stole stuff somewhere so its goes there the honor not to me so dont curse/bann/hate/sue/send-assasins/death-treats. etc...

peace lot of it im an anime fan i read too much i need a hobby

Tazuna, Sasuke and Sakura sweat dropped, Naruto on the other hand had just had his anger riled because Kakashi was late. Again.

“Wait, wait! Don’t tell me. You’re late today because you got lost on the road of life while helping some random old lady cross a random street; after saving her poor pooch from a rampage of S ranked criminals who had set a fire on the mime you were copying because you covered the wrong eye with your headband.”==

“Chakra is 50 spiritual energy and 50 stamina, there are also other types like Ki which is 93 mental energy and spiritual energy and 7 stamina, Psi 75 mental energy and 25 spiritual energy, and finally mana which is 40 Spiritual energy, 50 mental energy and 10 stamina.”==

I've done it! After eighteen weeks of hard labor digging out and building a secret basement lab, four months of hooking together unnessecarily complicated machinery, six days and nights of inputting incomprehensible code that even I can barely understand, and enough cups of coffee to fill a medium sized sea, I have finally completed my masterpiece! Now... if only I could remember what it does. Where are my notes?"==

Magic is the mental infestation of the life energy all humans contain, it is also known as mana. From the three forms of known life energy, that are able to be manipulated, magic users are recognized by there yellow auras. Where as the other two are recognized by their respective blue (chakra) and red (Ki) color. Ki is also called the physical infestation of life energy and Chakra is a combination of the physical and the mental. A Oniriyousha is easily recognizable by their yellow hair and blue eyes. The brighter the color, the greater their Mana supplies. It is even rumored that the really strong magic users eventually gain white hair and pure silver eyes and are able to increase their lifespan indefinitely. These are however rumors since nobody has ever been able to reach that level of power.-

"Chaos is the Ultimate Balance in the Universe. Both Good and Evil, both Right and Wrong, both Order and Darkness... to lose Chaos means to lose Everything."

Quotes:

--Don't piss me off today, I'm running out of places to hide to bodies XD
-- Evolution -- life's a niche, and then you die.
-- "The physiology exam was a piece of cake -- which was a bit of a surprise, actually, because I was expecting some questions on a sheet of paper."
-- If you can't live without me, why aren't you dead already?
-- If I seem to give a damn, please tell me. I would hate to be giving the wrong impression. XD
-- I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here.
-- I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
-- I find it rather easy to protray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
-- I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don't like?
-- Instant gratification takes too long.
-- Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked "Brightness," but it doesn't work.
-- Just when you realize life's a bitch, it has puppies.
-- The fellow that agrees with everything you say... is either a fool... or he is getting ready to skin you.
-- Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you mad.
-- I never forget a face, but in your case, I'll be glad to make an exception.
-- I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
-- I regard you with an indifference closely bordering on aversion.
-- Never raise your hand to your children; it leaves your midsection unprotected.
-- All the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
-- There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
-- When someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown about it, but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them.
-- Scientists say that 1 out of every 4 people are crazy... so go check 3 of your friends, if it's not them...
-- Ever notice how DYING is at the end of STUDYING?
-- I'm not antisocial, I just don't like you.
-- I ran into my ex the other day, then I put the car in reverse and ran over him again.
-- Life isn't about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away. Like choking.
-- I lay at my bed last night, counting the stars, and I thought to myself: Where the hell did my ceiling go?!
-- Finals equals academic suicide.
-- Well... The voices and I took a vote. It's unanimous; you suck.
-- I hear voices... They said they don't like you.
-- I'm sleeping...Please IM me quietly XD
-- Looking at the mirror. Enjoying the view. Be back later :D
-- Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
-- Leave a message, and I'll IM you back later. Leave a SEXY message and I'll IM you back sooner.
-- I'm not available right now so please leave your name, number, and address and I will Stalk you later.
-- You! Out of the gene pool--NOW!
-- Nostalgia? Revenge is a form of Nostalgia, right?
-- Due to circumstances within my control, tomorrow will be cancelled.
-- Due to recent cutbacks and until further notice, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
-- The shortest distance between two points is under construction.
-- Get your mind out of the gutter - it's blocking my view.
-- In man's struggle against the world, bet on the world.
-- If you can't say anything nice, then at least have the decency to be vague.
-- Depression n. - Anger without enthusiasm.
-- The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
-- Exhilaration is that feeling you get just after a great idea hits you, and just before you realize what is wrong with it.
-- I am currently occupied, give me a couple minutes to get frustrated and then I'll get back to you.
-- I'm drunk...I'm armed...I'm off my meds. You had better make your message really, really sweet.
-- Hi, I'm probably here, I'm just avoiding someone I don't want to talk to. Leave a message and if I don't IM you back, well, what can I say?
-- Nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it is time to get up.
-- That which does not kill me had better run pretty damn fast.
-- Money can't buy happiness, but poverty can't buy ANYTHING.
-- There are plenty more fish in the sea, but who wants to go out with a fish?

Extras and Funny Lists I Have Found:

(Okay, I looked at the forty-nine laws of anime and I couldn't stop laughing because it's absolutely true)

Fourty- Nine laws of Anime:

Originally compiled and edited by Darrin Bright and Ryan Shellito

1. Law of Metaphysical Irregularity
The normal laws of physics do not apply.

2. Law of Differentiated Gravitation
Whenever someone or something jumps, is thrown, or otherwise is rendered airborn, gravity is reduced by a factor of 4.

3. Law of Sonic Amplification, First Law of Anime Acoustics
In space, loud sounds, like explosions, are even louder because there is no air to get in the way.

4. Law of Constant Thrust, First Law of Anime Motion
In space, constant thrust equals constant velocity.

5. Law of Mechanical Mobility, Second Law of Anime Motion
The larger a mechanical device is, the faster it moves. Armored Mecha are the fastest objects known to human science.

6. Law of Temporal Variability
Time is not a constant. Time stops for the hero whenever he does something 'cool' or 'impressive'. Time slows down when friends and lovers are being killed and speeds up whenever there is a fight.

7. First Law of Temporal Mortality
'Good Guys' and 'Bad Guys' both die in one of two ways. Either so quick they don't even see it coming, OR it's a long drawn out affair where the character gains much insight to the workings of society, human existence or why the toast always lands butter side down.

8. Second Law of Temporal Mortality
It takes some time for bad guys to die... regardless of physical damage. Even when the 'Bad Guys' are killed so quickly they didn't even see it coming, it takes them a while to realize they are dead. This is attributed to the belief that being evil damages the Reality Lobe of the brain.

9. Law of Dramatic Emphasis
Scenes involving extreme amounts of action are depicted with either still-frames or black screens with a slash of bright color (usually red or white).

10, Law of Dramatic Multiplicity
Scenes that only happen once, for instance, a 'Good Guy' kicks the 'Bad Guy' in the face, are seen at least 3 times from 3 different angles.

11. Law of Inherent Combustability
Everything explodes. Everything.
First Corollary - Anything that explodes bulges first.
Second Corollary - Large cities are the most explosive substances known to human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities, sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".

12. Law of Phlogistatic Emission
Nearly all things emit light from fatal wounds.

13. Law of Energetic Emission
There is alway an energy build up (commonly referred to as an energy 'bulge') before Mecha or space craft weapons fire. Because of the explosive qualities of weapons, it is believed that this is related to the Law of Inherent Combustability.

14. Law of Inverse Lethal Magnitude
The destructive potential of a weapon is inversly proportional to its size.
First Corollary - Small and cute will always overcome big and ugly. Also know as the A-Ko phenomenon.

15. Law of Inexhaustability
No one EVER runs out of ammunition. That is of course unless they are cornered, out-numbered, out-classed, and unconscious.

16. Law of Inverse Accuracy
The accuracy of a 'Good Guy' when operating any form of fire-arm increases as the difficulty of the shot increases. The accuracy of the 'Bad Guys' when operating fire-arms decreases when the difficulty of the shot decreases. (Also known as the Stormtrooper Effect)
Example: A 'Good Guy' in a drunken stupor being held upside down from a moving vehicle will always hit, and several battalions of 'Bad Guys' firing on a 'Good Guy' standing alone in the middle of an open field will always miss.
First Corollary - The more 'Bad Guys' there are, the less likely they will hit anyone or do any real damage.
Second Corollary - Whenever a 'Good Guy' is faced with insurmountable odds, the 'Bad Guys' line up in neat rows, allowing the hero to take them all out with a single burst of automatic fire and then escape.
Third Corollary - Whenever a 'Good Guy' is actually hit by enemy fire, it is in a designated 'Good Guy Area', usually a flesh wound in the shoulder or arm, which restricts the 'Good Guy' from doing anything more strenuous than driving, firing weaponry, using melee weapons, operating heavy machinery, or doing complex martial arts maneuvres.

17. Law of Transient Romantic Unreliability
Minmei is a bimbo.

18. Law of Hemoglobin Capacity
The human body contains over 12 gallons of blood, sometimes more, under high pressure.

19. Law of Demonic Consistency
Demons and other supernatural creatures have at least three eyes, loads of fangs, tend to be yellow-green or brown (but black is not unknown), and can only be hurt by bladed weapons.

20. Law of Militaristic Unreliability
Huge galaxy-wide armadas, entire armies, and large war-machines full of cruel, heartless, bloodthirsty warriors can be stopped and defeated with a single insignificant example of a caring/loving emotion or a song.

21. Law of Tactical Unreliability
Tactical geniuses aren't...

22. Law of Inconsequential Undetectability
People never notice the little things... Like missing body parts, or wounds the size of Seattle.

23. Law of Juvenile Intellectuality
Children are smarter than adults. And almost always twice as annoying.

24. Law of Americanthropomorphism
Americans in Anime appear in one of two roles, either as a really nasty skinny 'Bad Guy' or a big stupid 'Good Guy'.
First Corollary - The only people who are more stupid than the big dumb Americans are the American translators. (Sometimes referred to as the Green Line Effect.)
Second Corollary - The only people who are more stupid than the American translators are the American editors and censors.

25. Law of Mandibular Proportionality
The size of a person's mouth is directly proportional to the volume at which they are speaking or eating.

26. Law of Feline Mutation
Any half-cat/half-human mutation will invariably:
a) be female
b) will possess ears and sometimes a tail as a genetic mutation
c)and wear as little clothing as possible, if any.

27. Law of Conservation of Firepower
Any powerful weapon capable of destroying/defeating an opponent in a single shot will invariably be reserved and used only as a last resort.

28. Law of Technological User-Benevolence
The formal training required to operate a spaceship or mecha is inversely proportional to its complexity.

29. Law of Melee Luminescence
Any being displaying extremely high levels of martial arts prowess and/or violent emotions emits light in the form of a glowing aura. This aura is usually blue for 'good guys' and red for 'bad guys'. This is attributed to Good being higher in the electromagnetic spectrum than Evil.

30. Law of Non-anthropomorphic Antagonism
All ugly, non-humanoid alien races are hostile, and usually hell-bent on destroying humanity for some obscure reason.

31. Law of Follicular Chroma Variability
Any color in the visible spectrum is considered a natural hair color. This color can change without warning or explanation.

32. Law of Follicular Permanence
Hair in anime is pretty much indestructable, and can resist any amount of meteorological conditions, energy emissions, physical abuse, or explosive effects and still look perfect. The only way to hurt someone's hair is the same way you deal with demons... with bladed weapons!

33. Law of Topological Aerodynamics, First Law of Anime Aero-Dynamics
ANY shape, no matter how convoluted or odd-looking, is automatically aerodynamic.

34. Law of Probable Attire
Clothing in anime follows certain predictable guidelines.
--Female characters wear as little clothing as possible, regardless of whether it is socially or meteorologically appropriate. Any female with an excessive amount of clothing will invariably have her clothes ripped to shreds or torn off somehow. If there is no opportunity to tear off the afore-mentioned female's clothes, then she will inexplicably take a shower for no apparent reason (also known as the Gratuitous Shower Scene).
--Whenever there is a headwind, a Male characters will invariably wear a long cloak which doesn't hamper movement and billows out dramatically behind him.
First Corollary (Cryo-Adaptability) - All anime characters are resistant to extremely cold temperatures, and do not need to wear heavy or warm clothing in snow.
Second Corollary (Indecent Invulnerability) - Bikinis render the wearer invulnerable to any form of damage.

35. Law of Musical Omnipotence
Any character capable of musical talent (singing, playing an instrument, etc.) is automatically capable of doing much more "simple" things like piloting mecha, fighting crime, stopping an intergalactic war, and so on... especially if they have never attempted these things before.

36. Law of Quitupular Aggultination
Also called "The Five-man Rule," when "Good Guys" group together, it tends to be in groups of five. There are five basic positions, which are:
a) The Hero/Leader
b) His girlfriend
c) His Best Friend/Rival
d) A Hulking Brute
e) A Dwarf/Kid
Between these basic positions are distributed several attributes, which include:
--Extreme Coolness
--Amazing intelligence
--Incredible Irritation

37. Law of Extradimensional Capacitance
All anime females have an extradimensional storage space of variable volume somewhere on their person from which they can instantly retrieve any object at a moment's notice.
First Corollary (The Hammer Rule) - The most common item stored is a heavy mallet, which can be used with unerring accuracy on any male who deserves it. Other common items include costumes/uniforms, power suits/armor, and large bazookas.

38. Law of Hydrostatic Emission
Eyes tend to be rather large in Anime. This is because they contain several gallons of water, which may be instantaneously released at high pressure through large tear ducts. The actual volume of water contained in the eyes is unknown, as there is no evidence to suggest that these reservoirs are actually capable of running out. The reason water tends to collect in the eyes is because Anime characters only have one large sweat gland, which is located at the back of the head. When extremely stressed, embarrassed, or worried, this sweat gland exudes a single but very large drop of sebaceous fluid.

39. Law of Inverse Attraction
Success at finding suitable mates is inversely proportionate to how desperately you want to be successful. The more you want, the less you get.
First Corollary Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real world...

40. Law of Nasal Sanguination
When sexually aroused, males in Anime don't get erections, they get nosebleeds. No one's sure why this is, though... the current theory suggests that larger eyes means smaller sinuses and thinner sinus tissue (see Law #38 above). Females don't get nosebleeds, but invariably get one heck of a blush along the cheeks and across the nose, suggesting a lot of bloodflow to that region.

41. Law of Xylolaceration
Wooden or bamboo swords are just as sharp as metal swords, if not sharper.

42. Law of Juvenile Omnipotence
Always send a boy to do a man's job. He'll get it done in half the time and twice the angst.

43. Law of Quadrotriscadecophobia
There is no Law #43.

44. Law of Nominative Clamovocation
The likelihood of success and damage done by a martial arts attack is directly proportional to the volume at which the full name of the attack is announced.

45. Law of Uninteruptable Metamorphosis
Regardless of how long or involved the transformation sequence or how many times they've seen it before, any 'Bad Guys' witnessing a mecha/hero/heroine transforming are too stunned to do anything to interrupt it.

46. Law of Flimsy Incognition
Simply changing into a costume or wearing a teensy mask can make you utterly unrecognizable to even your closest friends and relatives

overlord credits go this site

http://minievil.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well, there are all sorts of perks and you can set your own hours. However every Evil Overlord I've read about in books or seen in movies invariably gets overthrown and destroyed in the end. I've noticed that no matter whether they are barbarian lords, deranged wizards, mad scientists or alien invaders, they always seem to make the same basic mistakes every single time. With that in mind, allow me to present...

The Top 100 Things I'd Do
If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear plexiglass visors, not face-concealing ones.My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.Shooting is not too good for my enemies.The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.I will not gloat over my enemies' predicament before killing them.When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No." and shoot him. No, on second thought I'll shoot him then say "No."After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks' time during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out.I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labelled "Danger: Do Not Push". The big red button marked "Do Not Push" will instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard it. Similarly, the ON/OFF switch will not clearly be labelled as such.I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum -- a small hotel well outside my borders will work just as well.I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker enemies alive to show they pose no threat.One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any other form of last request.I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation.I will never utter the sentence "But before I kill you, there's just one thing I want to know."When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice.I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt to usurp power would easily fail, it would provide a fatal distraction at a crucial point in time.I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was evil, but one look at the hero's rugged countenance and she'd betray her own father.Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman footsoldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated and I want my troops to have a more positive mind-set.No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops in their use. That way -- even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless -- my troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and rocks.I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line "No, this cannot be! I AM INVINCIBLE!!" (After that, death is usually instantaneous.)No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and virtually inaccessible vulnerable spot.No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there is probably someone just as attractive who is not desperate to kill me. Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my bedchamber.I will never build only one of anything important. All important systems will have redundant control panels and power supplies. For the same reason I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at all times.My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble.I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion.All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards, and cowardly thieves in the land will be preemptively put to death. My foes will surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic relief.All naive, busty tavern wenches in my realm will be replaced with surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected reinforcement and/or romantic subplot for the hero or his sidekick.I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad news just to illustrate how evil I really am. Good messengers are hard to come by.I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions.I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of Generation X.I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a battle, I will believe him. After all, he's my trusted lieutenant.If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me in my old age.If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite number among his army.I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable superweapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve.Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel devices.When I capture the hero, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around.I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my plans.I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds to give the other guy a sporting chance.I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up I will not draw my weapon, point it at him, say "And here is the price for failure," then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.If an advisor says to me "My liege, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?", I will reply "This." and kill the advisor.If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for him to mature.I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge.If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell, I will immediately transfer him to a less people-oriented position.I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned tunnels that I might not know about.If the beautiful princess that I capture says "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!", I will say "Oh well" and kill her.I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary.The deformed mutants and odd-ball psychotics will have their place in my Legions of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention.My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice.Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will carefully read the owner's manual.If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose dramatically and toss off a one-liner.I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am.My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds, it will not be used. Note: this also applies to passwords.If my advisors ask "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?", I will not proceed until I have a response that satisfies them.I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight.Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And they will be kept hot, with none of that nonsense about flames going through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals.I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage.If I must have computer systems with publically available terminals, the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The actual main control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment.My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for fingerprints then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence will trigger the alarm system.No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a full-scale emergency.I will spare someone who saved my life sometime in the past. This is only reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they'd better save my life again.All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in foster-homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of the wild.When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering around a corner.If I decide to test a lieutenant's loyalty and see if he/she should be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen standing by in case the answer is no.If all the heroes are standing together around a strange device and begin to taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my unstoppable superweapon on them.I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged contest, even though my advisors assure me it is impossible for them to win.When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not label the disk "Project Overlord" and leave it lying on top of my desk.I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en masse, instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack one or two at a time.If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutentant, I will retain enough sanity to wait until my current trusted lieutenant is out of earshot before making the offer.I will not tell my Legions of Terror "And he must be taken alive!" The command will be "And try to take him alive if it is reasonably practical."If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins.If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress.If I am fighting with the hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him, and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat, I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out what he saw.I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure.If I'm eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex.I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, e.g. "Align the 12 Stones of Power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total eclipse." Instead it will be more along the lines of "Push the button."I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly grounded.My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them.If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again.After I captures the hero's superweapon, I will not immediately disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I took it from him. I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is facing away from the door.I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment is finished. It might actually be important.If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him. Instead I will say this his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of righteousness. (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and an underling who failed or betrayed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first.When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells the guard it's an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead of opening up the cell for a look.My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the control panel on the outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside opens the door, not vice versa.My dungeon cells will not be furnished with objects that contain reflective surfaces or anything that can be unravelled.If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I will ignore them. However if circumstance have forced them together against their will and they spend all their time bickering and criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when they are saving each others' lives at which point there are hints of sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45Mb in size.Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access.

overlord credits here

http://minievil.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

Everyone shuddered. Two screeches coming from a pink haired girl and duck-ass haired boy, is all greeting they received. "YOU'RE LATE!"

Kakashi scratched his head sheepishly. "Now, now. Calm down. We both have a perfectly good reason for being late, don't we Naruto-kun?" The blonde next to the man nodded in agreement.

Sakura glared hatefully at the two of them, tapping her foot. "Well!? Let's hear it!"

They nodded and Kakashi started. "We were on our way here when,"

Now Naruto spoke. "A black cat appeared in the road,"

Kakashi... "So naturally we had to take another route."

"Then we came across an eagle that was trapped in a bin and we freed it, earning it's gratitude..."

"Then when we started walking again, we noticed the Hokage tower on fire, so naturally..."

"We saved the day and lives of those poor paper- and pencil-pushers... so..."

And in unison. "We're hero's!!" They chirped, smiling happily.

Silence is all that greeted them... for several seconds anyway. Again, two screeches, the some ones as before, could be heard. "LIARS!"

Right after the two had screeched, a small Eagle flew into the clearing and landed on the shoulder of Kakashi. It then nipped his hair affectionately, and flew over to Naruto and did the same, then flew off into the sun's direction. Everyone blinked at the odd occurrence.

Kakashi coughed to clear his throat. "Anyway... Let's start this test. This alarm clock here is set to noon. I have on my belt, two bells, as does Anko over there. Your objectives is to get a bell. Each person that gets a bell passes. Simple as that. Understand?"

from http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1077352/ToxicManipulator fanfic

I have discovered the equation to go over the top in everything!

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98 percent
and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96 percent

but
A-T-T-I -T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100 percent

and,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103 percent

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118 percent

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while HARDWORK and KNOWLEDGE will get you close, and ATTITUDE will get you there, its really the BULLSHIT and the ASS KISSING that will put you over the top.

( )_( )
(='.'=) Rabbit-kun says, "YAOI SUCKS AND YOU KNOW IT!"
(")_(")

(\_/) ('")('")o Usagi-chan says, "Itachi-kun kicks ass, and Sasuke-teme takes it IN the ass"

(..)'(..)
(='.'=) This is Bunny. Put him on your profile to help him achieve World
(")_(") Domination and come join the Dark Side! We have cookies! MWAHAHA!