Hello all!

dagget here, and I'll tell you right now, I'm probably gonna be really lame a lot of the time! Why? Because none of you really know who I am. Bwahahahaha! No actually, I'm hard pressed to be serious in real life too. (which isn't to say that my constant jokes are any good)

I'm likely going to be infamous ( for the most part) for making my readers wait awhile for the smex. I was going to censor that stuff and send you to another site for the full version. But obviously that didn't happen. (lol) Dude there's so much smut in 'Jesus What The Hell Was That' even I can't get over it!

I really don't believe that every story should revolve around sex. I know that the main purpose of the internet is for porn though, and that most of the people surfing it are little smut freaks. And I respect that. (lol) I will write the occasional PWP when the mood strikes me but they would always be pretty short and funny.

I'm kind of on a Naruto kick right now but eventually I'll branch off. I used to love sasu/naru but I got sorta tired of it after a while. They're mostly either well written but uber angsty or just mega fluffy ooc. (That's right! I'm all about the yaoi! What ya gonna do about it? lol. Dude, I couldn't threaten anyone to save my life. .) I still like a good sasu/naru and to be honest, a lot of the pre-caught plot bunnies I have lying around are sasu/naru but I've got a thing for Itachi going on, (He's just so cool. XD) and I've got a major hankering to do a good Kyuu/naru now. I like Naruto with most people...I just like Naruto : ) I want to see him find love. (see what I mean about being lame?)

Anyway, what I don't like, is when people make Naruto a girl. What's up with that?!

Oh and I'm going to be posting some pics to go along with Art and Artifice on another site so I'll let everyone know here where to go for them a little later.

TTYL
dagget

Ok I've got a few up on yaoi gallery now. (yaoi.y-gallery.net/gallery/danget) You might have to join up temporarily to see them though. Actually that's only for when I get around to drawing something that needs to be filtered (meaning x-rated) and I probably will eventually.

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The Idiot's Guide to Flaming

Here it is ladies and gentlemen. I am going to personally hand out some tips on how to properly flame.

Now I will admit that I've only ever been flamed once, but let me tell you that it was a sore disappointment. I was waiting for my first flame and then when it came, it was a complete flop. I've seen an awful lot of poorly executed flames here and there and I think it's about time that people start spreading the word on proper flaming before one of these idiots hurts themselves. So here are the basic rules:

1) Please have a point. I can't stress this enough people. If you think something sucks, there has to be a reason. If you have no point then there's no point in reading your review.

2) Post some literary venture of your own before you attempt a flame. Think of it as your resume. We need to see some credentials damn it! You can't just walk in off the street! How do we know if you're qualified to be making this judgment? We can't let people go around writing these things all willy-nilly. (If nothing else, it's bad form not to give us something we can flame you back for.)

3) Check your spelling and grammar. There's nothing worse then making a bunch of grammatical errors right in the middle of telling someone else what's wrong with their writing. You lose all credibility. Yeah... You hear that?... They're laughing at you!

4) Do it with style. You've heard the saying, I'm sure. 'If a thing is worth doing it's worth doing well.' If you're actually going to take the time to cut someone down, the least you could do is get their attention. A simple 'duh... it sucks George' is not gonna cut it. Seriously. If you intend to be mean, then at least try to come off like the villain, and not like one of his nameless henchmen. (think scathing)

5) Read summary warnings. Trust me. You don't want to go ripping on people for content that you were clearly warned about. That honestly only makes you look like an idiot. Wait, what's that?... Oh, they're laughing at you again!

6) Throw in some amusing word play. When you step into the arena baby, you want to show off your skills. A truly good flame entertains the crowd. That way people don't just plain hate you outright. You want them to almost look forward to more of your acerbic wit.

A couple of new rules at the request of xxUnfortunateSoulxx ;

7) NO CAPS LOCK!! OR REPETITIVE PUNCTUATION!!. Not only does this make you look like a spazz, but it totally removes element of surprise. It's far too unsubtle. The author will immediately take note of what's going down and possibly not bother to read at all, and that's no fun. The best flames are sneak attacks. You want to lull your target into a false sense of security.

8) Keep the cursing to a minimum. I know you may be tempted to show off that 'vast vocabulary' of yours. But while a single curse (or creative phrase) in the right placement can accentuate a point or give a flame some interesting flavor, an over abundance of cursing will make it seem that you're trying to cover the fact that you don't actually have anything relevant to say. Remember, there is in fact a difference between enthusiasm and Tourette Syndrome. (And those people have a real problem. You shouldn't mock them like that... you animal.)

On more, inspired by a sudden influx of irritation;

9) Think quality, not quantity. Please, for the love of god, refrain from spamming the author with mountains of inane reviews, especially for a fic that you know is already complete. You cannot automatically assume that your opinion is important enough to the author that they'll actually bother to read twenty-some-odd crappy (repetitive and/or conflicting) comments? -yawn- You have to earn that kind of importance through a demonstration of skill and intelligence. While one may be able to get away with the multiple review tactic if each review has real substance, generally one big well-executed flame at the end has much more impact.

There they are. Please feel free to rip them off and post them where ever the hell you like. Don't hesitate to let me know if there's anything that you think should be added to the list as well. I may think of some more later myself. Invariably you think of more of them when you happen to see a poorly executed flame. It's a real problem and we need to get people educated on the issue.
Thank you for taking the time to review the facts.

I'd like to finish with a moment of silence for all the poor, lame little flames out there who never really had a chance...

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Now that I've said all that, I'm going to let someone else enlighten all of the non-flamers out there who don't know how, or just don't bother to write a good positive review. Digital Skitty has given us all a wonderful run-down of the points on that issue. The link can be found on Digital Skitty's profile, entitled "Think before you type." I urge everyone to give it a read over and support the cause!

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No C2s

Well, I've had a few invites, so I'm gonna just go ahead and tell everyone right here (with the understanding, of course, that it may not be read anyway) that there's not a high probability that I'll end up joining any C2s. The thing is, I'm just extremely picky. I can read something and find enough entertainment value in it to make it to the end, but still not see it as worth any real 'honorable mention'. I don't really want to put anyone down. Like, not to say that a lot of fics suck... well, no wait. Yeah, a lot of fics suck. XP But usually it's not that they suck entirely. It's just an aspect or two that unfortunately brings down the quality level. There are so many things that can ruin a story. If the idea is interesting but the plot is rushed. If it's cute but there are so many technical errors that it's actually hard to read. Or it could be technically fine but so damn emo, it's reached the point of purely pathetic drivel. Which brings me to the beast known as over-kill.

If Naruto discovers a blood-line limited ability, that's cool. That can be a good plot device. If he discovers he has seven of them, that's overkill. If Harry Potter has an animagus form, that's cool. If he has three of them and five familiars and finds out he's the descendant of all four founders and Merlin himself, now you're being ridiculous. It makes the whole story sound juvenile.

I also have a bit of a problem with unfinished works, because I've seen lots of fics go sour. They can start out awesome and then completely change direction. My poor brain can't handle the incongruity. Or they hit the point where you can tell that the author is getting lost because they hadn't outlined this story to the end, and now they don't know where they're going with it. Usually this means you end up with several chapters where nothing really happens and you're left going 'huh?'. Then of course they could just never be finished at all. (that's a big one). You'll note that my favorites list doesn't include many incomplete works. They have to be exceptionally well written for me to show that kind of faith.

Actually, my favorites list is a great example of why I don't care for C2s. Look how short it is. You have no idea how much I've read, and my favorites number only 25. Basically, if I can look at a title and find myself saying, "now which story was that?" then it's not worth mentioning (or reading over again). I can't be part of a C2 whose quality control isn't up to my own, admittedly very harsh standards. It would grate on me. I'd want so badly to go through and throw all kinds of stuff out. You'd hate me.

Shit I'm sorry. I rant sometimes.

Thoughts on Gay Marriage! (as stolen from the profile of EmpyrealFantasy)

1) Gay marriage is not natural, and as Americans, we always reject unatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and lyposuction.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...

Have PRIDE! Support Gay Marriage!