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Wilfred Humbug
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email: Email
since: 01-08-07, id: 1191039, Profile Updated: 10-03-09
country: New Zealand
Author has written 5 stories for Naruto.

Name: Holly, Lolly, Wilfred, Willer, Wilbur, Wilberforce, Lousy Minger, Willy

Age: Older then some, younger then most

Eyes: blue

Hair: Hmm, hard to say. Browny-blonde? More brown nowadays. It's two-tone. Apparently it's mousy blonde.

Likes: Reading, writing as a stress reliever, talking

Dislikes: Going places to hang out with friends, having friends over. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends, I just hate the whole social thing. I don't like people who pose, nor wannabe "Gangstas" and homophobes. I really hate it when people use the word gay to mean bad.

You can tell when I'm happy because: I hum The Omen the myself. Strange, I know.

You can tell when I'm upset because: I'll be humming the strange "Bluebirds" song to myself. Don't know the title, don't know most of the lyrics but I know the tune and it's beautiful.

You can tell when I'm really angry because: I'll be humming Yellow Submarine to myself.

So. Yeah. I love Yaoi, by the way. I think it is utterly amazing in every way.


Heh, random stuff that's killed me with laughter:


Art teacher: Rosie, you need to put some shading on that.

Rosie: How do you shade with a pencil!?


Me and my friends talking about going for our drivers license

Me: The driving test should be easy, It's more common sense. Just stick to the right side of the road and you'll be fine.

Nicole: We drive on the LEFT side of the road.


Gyusle: Did you know that a sneeze is one eighth of an orgasm? And running a hand over the knee is one fifth?

Male maths teacher who honestly came out of nowhere!

Maths teacher: No I did not.


Me on crutches for second time that year because I'd broken my ankle, P.E. teacher filling in the substitute

P.E. teacher: And this is Holly, she's incredibly accident prone, watch out for her.

Another time

History teacher: Hey Holly! How are you?

Me: Good!

History teacher: Anymore injuries? You're not on crutches, that's a good sign!

Me: Yeah, I sprained my back.

History teacher: You're a barely walking disaster zone!

Yet another time

Science teacher: Carefully Holly, I know how accident prone you are.

The science teachers comment made me blink. It was the first day of the year and she'd never taught me before. I didn't think she even knew my name before that.


Me having just bought a poppy and come home.

Mum: Oh! A poppy! Give me!

Me: Go get one yourself! They sell them everywhere!

Mum: But I'm not going out anytime soon, and I need one, a relative of mine died in the war!

Me: ...Mum, I am your daughter, that means they are also my relative.


ASDA automatic answering machine: We are a 24 hours store. Press one for our opening hours.


Newsreader: Police are now telling local fruit pickers to keep their eyes peeled.


Elmie: It was last night! No, wait, last week, last night!


Me: Thank God I'm not religious. -Facepalm-


Geography teacher (after explaining something): Everyone happy now?

Some of the class and myself: No.

Geography teacher turns to me: I didn't mean in life!

(I start screeching at him indignantly)


(I walk into the kitchen, I'd been trying but unable to sleep for two hours)

My sister turns around and jumps backwards in shock: God, Holly! You look like crap!


Rosie: -Picks up bag of chips- ...Does Harry Potter like Poppa Jacks?


Dad: This is bad. My nose hair is starting to join with my beard.

Room is thrown into a sudden awkward scilence

Me: ...Ew.


Nicole: Hey! My boobs jiggle when I sit down! See! -Sits down again-


On DVD, one sticker reads: 19.99, another larger and more colourful sticker further down reads: HOT PRICE, UNDER 20.


Teacher hands out various mini chocolate bars during a Classics lesson about ancient Greek parties

Teacher: There! Now it's like a real symposium

Gyusle: Great! Now all we need are strippers!

(later)

Me: This lesson is boring. I'm with Gyusle, we need strippers.

Rachel: Why? You volunteering?


Geography teacher talking about Las Vegas

Rona: I want to get married in Las Vegas.

Teacher: If you can find someone stupid enough.


(Girl to male history teacher): If Stalin and Hitler asked you out, who would you go out with?

History teacher thinks carefully: I don't know...I'd probably ask for a threesome.


Friends and I discussing what USB means: It's Universal for the U, know about that much.

Geo teacher: Universal Son of a Bitch?


Dad: Tim Burton? Ain't he the guy that does Wagon Wheels?

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1. Ice Falling reviews
Naruto and Sasuke spend some quality time together ice-skating. Or Falling really. Yaoi. Sasu/Naru
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,703 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 3-26-08 - Naruto U. & Sasuke U. - Complete
2. Three Simple Words reviews
Naruto wants to hear three little words from Sasuke. Humor... I hope.
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 432 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 3-23-08 - Naruto U. & Sasuke U. - Complete
3. Konoha Academy of love? reviews
Team 7 is assigned a mission to help out at the academy. One shot. Kaka/Iruk and Sasu/Naru. Yeah title sucks but I'm not very imaginative.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,393 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 2-10-08 - Naruto U. & Sasuke U. - Complete
4. Raging Storms reviews
Naruto has a fear of storms. He and Sasuke have to share a bed for the night. Non-lemon Basically fluff without a plot. Yayness for yaoiness! Sasuke/Naruto. Un-beta’d.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,779 - Reviews: 11 - Published: 2-6-08 - Naruto U. & Sasuke U. - Complete
5. Four Years For You reviews
Sasuke follows Naruto home late one night. Yaoi. This means Male/male love. basically PWP, lemon. Don’t like then don’t read. Sasu/Naru
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,526 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 1-11-08 - Naruto U. & Sasuke U. - Complete
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