Hey, all you dudes and (surprisingly) dudettes! If you're coming here, you've obvioulsy read one of my stories and want to learn a bit more about me. Either that, or you're a pedophile. Well, read on, me bitches. You're not going to find anything important.

Profile updated January 4, 2009.

Rather than beating around the bush, I'll dish out the news right at the start: I will no longer be making anymore Fanfiction stories.

Some of you are surprised, some of you saw this coming, some of you don't care. For those of you do, however, I'll explain why I've made this decision.

There is no way that I can make either the physical or mental sacrifice to sit down and crank out these stories during the school year. I have so much shit to deal with in terms of classes, clubs, work, and just life in general. When I'm not doing physical work, my mind is almost always distracted by video games or the tantalizing siren call of surfing the Internet randomly. More and more, it's getting harder for me to make making these stories a priority.

Although probably the even bigger reason I've decided to stop making these is that frankly, I've just lost interest. I can't spend hours writing and revising stories of an underage Mary Sue with the same enthusiasm that I used to have. I guess you could call it sheer boredom, or you could call it growing up. Maybe I should e-mail CrazyNinjaPenguin and ask him what keeps a guy in his early 20's to continue making perverted yuri stories. Probably just his passion, and mine's apparently gone.

You guys have all been great, favoriting and reading my videos for almost precicely two years. All of your comments and feedback have made it extremely worthwhile for me to make these as long as I did. It's really nice to get affirmation from others that I may actually have a sense of humor, however grotesque, juvenile, or just plain random it can be. I really feel like I should make one last story just thanking you guys, but sadly, technological and time constraints make even doing that pretty much impossible. I'll try to get around to that eventually.

So yeah, thanks again to all of you for sticking with me, and I'm extremely sorry to disappoint those of you who were eagerly awaiting new material. Hopefully CrazyNinjaPenguin, Fangz of Fire, Takuosuka and other yuri writerscan fill the void. But maybe I'll get an idea for an entirely different new series or whatever sometime in the future. As for now, farewell, and at the risk of being redundant, I thank you all!

Things I like: Yuri, sexy/cute female characters in anime, creepy little girls, video games, metal music, country music, people who pay attention to spelling, most mythical creatures including vampires, werewolves and dragons, fire, long books, fantasy fiction, sci-fi movies, anime that has both plot and action, people who update stories on a regular basis, writing in 1337 5p33X to confuse people, youtube, the Undertaker, Dane Cook, Jeff Dunham, Code Monkeys, cool science teachers, Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw, Red vs Blue, DigitalPh33r, all the good abridged serieses, Wikipedia, and telling people that writers are automatically legally entitled to have acid trips (Which I tend to do a lot).

Favorite japanese and french anime: Naruto, Death Note, Bleach, Blood, Hellsing Ultimate and Code Lyoko.

Hentai likes: Yuri, Breast/butt expansion, futanari, lolicon, yuri or straight incest, BDSM, bondage, use of toys and so on. The list could go on and on...

Hentaidislikes: Yaoi, shonen-ai, BL, guro, beastiality, sad sex scenes, emo characters, and so on and so forth.

Guess what? I have a blog now. It's called Kyouger's blog (At least until I come up with a better name) and the link is here: http://kyouger.blogspot.com/ It'd mean a lot to me if some of you guys commented. All it has now is some basic info, and a few game reviews, but it'll have some of my day-to-day activities, planned LM,LD omakes, and advice on making hentai writing. I'd really appreciate it if some of you guys commented (You can even do it anonymously), just telling me that you'll read it.

Works in progress:

Like mother, Like daughter: My third story, and the one that has made me famous throughout this site. Over 50,000 hits, 250 reviews and god knows how many favs and alerts. I honestly can't believe how fast this story has taken off. I'd like to personally thank each and every one of you that fed my ego. The crossover with Takuosuka is now finished; go check it out now.

Pale Eyes and Gentle Fists: My first attempt to make a not perverted oneshot. Made mainly because I like the pairing immensely, Hanabi doesn't get enough screen time, and that the other ones were a bit confusing.

A Little Sister's dream, a Big Daddy's nightmare: My first Bioshock fic. I had intended on making it just a normal one-shot, which seems to be a growing trend for me, but it seems too good to let go. Be on the lookout for a new full-length fiction that probably won't be getting many updates.

The true ending to Bioshock: I thought this was completely kick-ass, so I decided to put it up on here. But I suppose I should put a link to the real story on Deviantart so I don't get sued. http://lieunacy.deviantart.com/art/The-true-ending-to-Bioshock-64584388

Alright guys, it would seem that I've gone through another deleting spell. Both Angel's first time and Angel's travels are deleted. I was never going to pick up AT again, and AFT was just crap from my beginning days as a writer. Please don't message me or whine about it; I already know that they're down and they're going to stay that way.

Now for my much shorter favorite quotes section.

Achmed the Dead Terrorist: "Killing is easy; being politically correct is a pain in the ass."

My motto: All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and higher pay for not getting it done.

"As for the guns, I could mention the hugely satisfying penis extension gun that pins baddies to walls with entire trees, but all you need to know is that there is a gun that shoots shurikens and lightning. I wish I could make something like that up; it shoot shurikens and lightning. The only way it could be cooler was if it had tits and was on fire." (Zero Punctuation, Painkiller review)

"What's the difference between Sarah Palin's mouth and her vagina?" "I have no earthly clue." "Only one of the things that's come out of her vagina has been retarded." "Oh, that's cold, Yahtzee." (Australian Gamer podcast)

(If you like video reviews with a hint of schizophrenia, check Yahtzee Croshaw's videos out NOW! I command you, mind slave! http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation)

CAPS LOCK IS LIKE CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL: AJW1893

Dave from Code Monkeys: "Dude, no. We have to go. When I'm the voice of reason, reason is in deep fucking trouble."

"How do you sell anything and everything? GIVE IT FUCKING BOOBZ!" Jollyjack from Deviantart.

Number your 12 fave anime characters (In no order) and answer the questions!!

1. Hinata
2. L (Or Ryuzaki, or Lawliet, or whatever you want to call him)
3. Tohya
4. Jan Valentine
5. Misa-Misa
6. Toph
7. Largo
8. Diva
9. Seras
10. Katara
11. Hagi
12. Aelita

1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fanfic before?
No. That would be exceedingly odd.

2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Um, I guess to a girl he might be hot, but not to me.

3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
I would be the one filming the birth.

4) Do you recall any fics about Nine?
A... couple. I don't read Hellsing fanfiction as often as I should.

5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
L and Toph. Huh. Truth be told, I haven't the foggiest idea. Now I'm going to have to wear out a couple hundred brain cells thinking about this. Thanks a lot, internet meme! You're making me dumber than when I started!

6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten?
Hm. I think Misa-Misa would get together better with Katara, but it would be much sexier with Seras, so... I don't know which.

7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex? :3
Considering he'd probably be carrying enough firearms to supply a small Third-World country for war against the United Nations Space Command, I'd say we'd have to call Chuck Norris, Bruce Lee and MC Hammer's parachute pants to handle the situation.

8) Make up a summary of a Three/Ten Fanfic.
Uhhhhhhhhhhh... Let me get back to you on that.

9) Is there any such thing as a One/Eight fluff?
Only in my mind. There should be, though.

10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic.
"Largo's Avatar?" Give me a break people! I'm not God! I can't make things like this work!

11) What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One?
"Cause statutory rape's the coolest way to get laid." Adam and Andrew, men much wiser than me.

12) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
Not me, I'm sure of that.

13) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Could be. Hagi is a pretty popular character.

14) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five ?
I don't know! Hell, L is pretty cool, so maybe someone does.

15) What might seven scream at a moment of great passion? :3
"PH34R M4H 1337 VV0/V\31\1 5K1LLZ!"

16) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?
I got nothing. Probably some sappy opera song with a female singer.

17) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?
Inspired by a dream I had while falling asleep on my computer with a bag of Cheetos in one hand and a hentai novel in the other. So, it probably sucks. But that's why you're reading it, right?

18) What might be a good pick-up line for Ten to use on Two?
(First, Katara fakes being beaten. L comes into hospital to investigate) "Hey L, are you doing an investigation?" "Yes, I am." "Well, aren't you going to take my clothes as evidence?" (Winks.)

19) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Yesterday! Crazyninjapenguin fucking OWNS!

20) What is Six's super-secret kink?
Dude, do I even need to say it? Foot fetish, obviously.

21) Would Eleven get in bed with Nine? Drunk or sober?
I could see that happening, but only if Hagi had a blood-alcohol of about 16.9.

22) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
Well at least they're in the same frigging series this time. Probably Largo, since he's always wanted to kill her.

23) "One (Hinata) and Nine (Seras) are in a happy relationship until Nine (Seras) suddenly runs off with Four (Jan). One (Hinata), broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven (Hagi) and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve (Aelita),then follows the wise advice of Five (Misa-Misa) and finds true love with Three (Tohya)."

What title would you give this fic?
"The Night of the Purple Mushrooms." Because that's what I would have to be on to do something like that.

24) Name three of your friends who might read it.
Probably no one. I mean, they may skim over the first chapter and realize it's not their thing and leave a review saying so, but I think that's about it.

25)Name one person who should write it.
Crazyninjapenguin, obviously. Or Roxius. He might be able to pull it off.

26) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Are you familiar with the term "laugh my fucking ass off?"

Wow, you actually made it to the bottom. To you I give this message: read my stories, dammit! I don't write this crap for my health! Thank you for that line, Takuosuka. I am not ripping you off. Please don't sue me.