Hi there, I'm Pryotra, a bored girl with nothing better to do then write Fanfiction. I've written stuff before on other sites, so I do know what I'm doing.

Favorite Catagories and why I like them. (listed by which one I think of first)

Naruto: Ninja are cooler then pirates, and it's probably the most interesting plotted story I've seen. Seriously, Forget Rowling, this is pure gold! It just keeps getting better!

Kingdom Hearts-The whole series rocks. Riddled with plot twists and humor. Because of the main characters, it can't be annoyingly dark and dreary, but it has enough darkness to make it interesting.

Harry Potter-Although I didn't like the last four books, I liked the first ones, so I'll be loyal. Also, it's a fun series to play with.

Pokemon-The manga rocks. I don't care what anyone says. Leave me alone.

Legend of Zelda-Twilight Princess rocked my socks. Midna was the neatest girl character I've seen in a while.

Yu-Gi-Oh (not GX)-I liked it. It was the anime that got me truely hooked.

Tales of the Abyss-It was so funny, and the plot was so fun.

Legend of Mana-My all time favorite RPG.

Favorite Characters and why I like them

Seto Kaiba (Yu-Gi-Oh)-I love characters like him. So calm, so cold, so collected. He should have been the main character. He was also the only main character with a past.

Kisara (Yu-Gi-Oh)-Although she wasn't there that often, I found her very interesting.

Silver (Pokemon GSC)-Shut up. He's cool in the manga.

Wes/Seth (Pokemon Coloseum)-So what, he never talked. The very idea behind him was interesting. A guy who ditches his team of thieves and steals a valuable item from them.

Ren Tao(Shaman King)-I love his weapon, and his attitude, and his dubbed accent was cute.

Luke Febre (Tales of the Abyss)-He was hilarious, also the replica thing was cool.

Riku (Kingdom Hearts)-His personality is funny in the manga, and he seems to plan more then Sora. I hope there will be more of him in the next game. I like guys who were once kinda bad coming back and being really cool. I'm weird that way.

Sirius Black (Harry Potter)-I cried when he died. He was so interesting. He should have had his own series.

Naruto (Naruto)-One of the few times I like a main character. I like his determination and how he copes with how much everyone hated him when he was young. One of the only times when I've really, really wanted to see the main character win.

Neji (Naruto)-He was cool once Naruto beat him up a little and he stopped ranting about destiny.

Hinata (Naruto)-She's so sweet. I just can't not like her.

Gaara (Naruto)-If anyone deserves a Highest Achevement Award, it's him. From sadistic murderer to actually kinda cool Kazekage.

L (Death Note) - Quirky, interesting, sugar addicted, liar with insomnia and a scary brain. What more could I want in life? I just want to take him out into the sun, hug him, and see if his dark circles go away... Also, the manga and anime both have a beautiful tribute to him: they're boring once he dies. Even the creators liked him better than the main character.

Favorite Parings:

Seto/Kisara (Yu-Gi-Oh)

Sora/Kairi (Kingdom Hearts)

Wes/Rui (Pokemon Coloseum)

Silver/Crystal (Pokemon GSC)

Draco/Hermione (Harry Potter)

Harry/Hermione (Harry Potter)

Riku/OC (Kingdom Hearts) (as long as their not a Mary Sue)

Kenshin/Kaoru (Rurouni Kenshin)

Ash/Misty (Pokemon)

Naruto/Hinata (Naruto)

Neji/Tenten (Naruto)

Sasuke/Sakura (Naruto) (I have never seen two people who deserved one another more.)

Least Favorite Parings:

Any and all Yaoi or Yuri parings

Ron/Hermione (Harry Potter)

Harry/Ginny (Harry Potter)

Seto/Serenity (Yu-Gi-Oh)

Seto/Tea (Yu-Gi-Oh)

Snape/anyone (Harry Potter)

Crystal/Gold (Pokemon GSC)

Ash/May (Pokemon)

Riku/Mary Sue (Kingdom Hearts)

Naruto/Sakura (Naruto)

Stuff about me:

Just because it's not cool, doesn't mean I don't like it.

I have this weird love of plot twists, love potions, memory loss, alternate universes, spells/potions that make people act out of character, bad guys really being good, good guys really being bad, and guys who are normally the rival/antihero of a story. If any readers have stories in a series/book/game I know that is rated T or less E-mail me, and I will look at it.

I can touch my nose with my tongue.

For all you who read my story, Hakumei, and who are interested in what the uniform actually looks like, the the link to my drawing is here. I hope you like it!

Update: Woot! I have Fanart!~ Here's the link: Enjoyand leave a nice comment!

And there's more: http://stray-ink92.deviantart.com/gallery/26780922

Fanfiction survey

How many fanfictions do you have submitted?

3

Which one has the most reviews?

Hakumei (if it hadn't I would have been surprised)

Least?

Tom Riddle and the Order of the Phoenix

Which fanfiction has the most words?

Hakumei

Which fanfiction has the most chapters?

Hakumei

What category are the majority of your fanfictions in?

Harry Potter

What do you like most in reviews: Quality or Quanity?

I must admit I love quantity, but I really appreciate the quality ones.

Have any of your fanfictions made it into at least one C2?

41 (as of Dec 4, 2008)

Are any of your fanfictions on at least one person's favorites list?

Yes

Are any of your fanfictions on at least one person's alert list?

Yes

What genre do you most frequently write in?

Action/Adventure

Do you leave comments before and after a chapter?

Yes

Do you update frequently?

Every three weeks, unless there's something up with me.

Do you frequently use original characters?

Not if I can help it, but Hakumei demands that I use a few in order to make sense.

THE NARUTARD SURVEY! NARUTARDS UNITE!

1. Who is your favourite Naruto character(s)? Naruto, Itachi-sama, Gaara, Neji, Hinata, and Sakura (now that she's not a twit)

2. What is your favourite pairing(s)? NaruHina SasuSaku SasuFemNaru (I sware I would support that couple forever if Naruto was a girl) NejiTen ShikaTama IrukaAnko InoSai

3. Are you a Naruto yaoi or hentai fan? Neither

4. Ever cosplayed Naruto characters? If so, who, where and how many times? Nope, but I once carved a pumpkin that looked like Itachi-sama

5. List your collection of Naruto junk and merchandise, if any: I get everything from the internet like the anime and the manga

6. Have you ever felt that you were destined to be with a Naruto character? If so, who? Itachi-sama (for one thing, he's the only one that makes me feel like I'm not a cradle-robber)

7. NaruHina or KibaHina? NaruHina all the way

8. SasuSaku or SasuNaru? Sasusaku

9. Which team is your favourite? Team 7 (Old and new)

10. Do you support the obito theory? (Tobi=Obito) I support something more like Madarobito

11. Do you support the 'Yondaime is Naruto's father' theory? Yeah, it's proven too

12. Your favourite Akatsuki member? Itachi-sama and possible Deidara

13. Are you Pro-Sasuke or Anti-Sasuke? Anti-Sasuke. Someone needs to beat some sense into him very badly before I consider him somewhat decent.

14. Have you seen all Naruto episodes so far (including Shippuuden and filler)? I skipped a few of the Fillers, but other then that, yeah.

15. Have you read all the chapters so far? OH YEAH!

16. Do you believe Naruto has ADD? Nope

17. Sub or dub? Sub. The dub ought to die!

18. Pro-Sakura or Anti-Sakura? Pro Sakura now, but I used to be Anti.

19. Tobi = Annoying or funny? Evil. He used to be simply freaky, but now he's Evil

20. Do you even know who Tobi is? Yes, and he really kind of freaks me out.

21. Gai = Sexy beast or Ugly nerd? Ugly Nerd. Weird Ugly Nerd.

22. Which character would be the best crossdresser? Haku

23. Rock Lee = Weird or Awesome? Kinda weird kinda cute.

24. Which character would be best OOC? Who and how? Sasuke if he was little ball of sunshine like Naruto!

25. Do you like Naruto fanfics? Oh yeah!

26. Do you write Naruto fanfics? Of course!

27. Do you like lemons? No

28. Do your parents know about the Naruto characters? Not really.

29. Have you watched the Naruto Abridged Series? I saw one once, but I didn't really like it...

30. Have you seen The Naruto Ultimate Fanflashes? Over and over and over...

31. Have you ever gotten someone else hooked on Naruto? Nope, everyone I know hates it.

32. Have you ever been drawing Naruto in school and has someone recognized it? No, but I've recongnized someone else...

33. Have you ever been in class drawing Naruto and the teacher came up to you and

said 'WTF is this?' Nope

34. Has Naruto affected your school life and grades? Life no. Grades, no, I'm still getting A's mostly.

35. Are you broke thanks to Naruto? I don't worship fictional characters, I'm not that far gone...

36. Do you want to read Icha Icha Paradise? Not really. I would probably want to murder Jiraiya...or just resurrect him and kill him.

37. Do you support the 'Yondaime is the Akatsuki Leader' theory? It's amusing, and I've seen some good fics, but I don't support it. Also, it's wrong so who cares?

38. Do you draw Naruto fanart? If so, count how many there are in your gallery. I once drew a FemNaru pic, and I have my Hakumei Hinata one.

39. Is Sasuke still sexy in his second stage of the cursed seal? Absolutely not.

40. Do you have a Naruto OC? I have a few.

41. Looking back at some of your answers, do you think Naruto has taken over your life? It's taken over my fanfiction life...

Harry Potter Quiz from Princess-MackenzieJ's profile

1. Which is your favorite Harry Potter book? Prisoner of Azkaban

2. Which is your favorite Harry Potter movie? Order of the Phoenix (That's the only movie that I've actually liked so far...)

3. Who is your favorite HP character(s)? Sirius, Hermione, Harry (before the fifth book, when he wasn't a whiny, angsty brat (I want to see him and Sasuke have an Emo compatition))

4. What house do you prefer to be in? Slytherin (just to mess with people...)

5. But what house would you think you'll be in? Ravenclaw or Slytherin (everyone tells me I'm really smart, and I know I'm ambitious.)

6. Which ghost within Hogwarts is your favorite? Moaning Myrtle

7. What subject in Hogwarts do you like the best? Defence Against the Dark Arts (if it was done right), Potions, Charms, and History of Magic (as long as it's taught by someone other then Binns)

8. Who is your favorite teacher in Hogwarts? Lupin

9. Which position would you want to be in for Quidditch? Beater (If I played)

10. Which position in Quidditch do you think fits you the most? Beater (I've kind of violent at sports, but I hate most sports anyways, so I wouldn't try out...)

11. Who do you want to make friends with? Luna, Myrtle (the things she could tell you), Hermione (get her away from Weaselface), Fred and George.

12. If you were in Hogwarts, who would be your best buddy? Hermione

13. Why would he/she be your best buddy? We both understand the concept: knowledge is power.

14. Which character in the book can you relate to? None of them.

15. What pet would you get? A cat, owl, toad, or rat? Cat

Yes/No Questions:

17. Do you think Snape is on Voldemort's side? I really wanted him to be, just so that Dumbledore would be wrong for a change. (I hate that man so much...)

18. Did you cry when Dumbledore died? Actually I was more like HA! DIE YOU NASTY MANIPULATIVE OLD FOOL!

19. Did you cry when Sirius died? Oh yeah.

20. Did you cry when Cedric Diggory died? No, I really didn't have the feelings for him for me to cry.

21. Do you like the outcome of the Deathly Hallows? Not in the slightest

22. Did you like the couples that the books ended with? No. Hermione is too good for Ron (who's an idiot) and I swear Ginny was giving Harry a love potion.

23. Do you often dream of yourself in Hogwarts? I did once...

24. Would you freak out if you found out you had to come face-to-face to a dragon? Like the ones in that book? No, I'd probably be dead.

Knowledge Questions

25. Who was the first to ever beat Harry in catching the Snitch? Cedric Diggory

26. What did Hagrid give to Harry at the end of The Sorcerer's Stone? A photo album

27. Whose eyes does Harry's resemble? His mom's

28. Who was crying in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom in year 6? Draco

29. Where does Harry suspect Hagrid's wand is hidden in? His flowery pink umbrella

30. Who created the flying keys obstacle in the Sorcerer's Stone? Flitwick

31. How many keys were there in Mad-Eye Moody's trunk? 7

32. What spell is used to give light at the end of the wand? Lumos.

33. What are the three Unforgivable Curses? Avada Kedavra, Crucio, and Imperio

34. What do the Three Unforgivable Curses do? Crucio tortures. Avada Kedavra kills. Imperio controls.

35. Who said "To a well organized mind, death is but the next great adventure."? Bumblebore

36. Who was the werewolf that bit Remus Lupin when he was a kid? Fenrir Greyback (what an original name...)

37. What does Sirius and James used to use to communicate? twin mirrors

38. How many brothers does Ron have? 5

39. What is Ron very good at? Chess?

40. What Quidditch Team does Ron like? Chudley Cannons

41. What's Harry's worst fear? Dementors.

42. What is Hermione's favorite subject? Transfiguration? Or Arithmancy? Arithmancy.

43. What is the spell used to put out the light casted by the incanation "Lumos!"? Nox.

44. What exactly is Peeves? Poltergeist

45. What did Draco Malfoy once bought in Borgin and Burkes? The Hand of Glory

46. What creature petrifies the person who looks indirectly into its eyes? Basilisk

47. Where did James Potter rescue Snape when they were in Hogwarts? The Whomping Willow

48. Where can you buy delicious sweets in Hogsmeade? Honeyduke's

49. Where did the first DA meeting took place in? The Hog’s Head.

50. Where did the Order of Phoenix meetings took place in? 12 Grimmauld Place

51. Who did Hermione Granger go to the Yule Ball with? Viktor Krum.

52. What did Fred and George drink to get themselves old enough for the Triwizard Tournament? Aging Potion

53. What other foriegn wizarding schools are joining the Triwizard Tournament? Beaubaxtons and Drumstrang

54. What did Snape brew for Lupin to keep him safe from the full moon? Wolfsbane Potion

55. What is Madam Pince's job in Hogwarts? Librarian

56. Who is the Quidditch referee? Madam Hooch

57. What color hair does Parvati have? Brown.

58. How many OWLs did Fred and George each recieved? 3

59. What did Dobby give Harry for the second task? Gillyweed

60. Who was Barty Crouch's house-elf? Winky

61. What is Neville's best subject in Hogwarts? Herbology

62. Who did Ginny go to the Yule Ball with? Neville

If:

63. If you happened to discover the Mirror of Erised, what would you see in it? Myself as a published author

64. If you had a choice between a Firebolt and an Invisibility Cloak, what would you pick? Invisibility Cloak hands down.

65. If your friend was pulled into the Whomping Willow by a black dog, would you jump in and rescue him/her? Yes, with a gun.

66. If Sirius Black turned up in your doorstep, what would be your reaction? open door blink point shake head decide that I've been reading too much fanfiction, and have gone insane Would you like to come in?

67. If you found out you could speak Parseltongue, who would you tell to (characters in the HP book)? No one, I'd have it as a useful ablity that may come in more handy if no one knows about it.

68. If you landed yourself in the same situation as Harry was in with Umbridge's detention, would you tell anyone about the marks on your hand? Yep.

More questions:

69. Who do you want to go to the Yule Ball with? Sirius (if it was Marauder Era) or one of the lesser Slytherins (I don't really have a crush in the Trio Era)

70. Post a HP character that has the same hair color as you do. Hermione

71. Post a character that has the same eye color as you. Harry

72. What color comes into your mind when Sirius Black is mentioned? Silver, I really don't know why.

73. What color comes into your mind when Tonks is mentioned? Purply Green (I still don't know why)

74. What color comes into your mind when Ron is mentioned? Orange

75. What color comes into your mind when Hermione is mentioned? Tan.

76. What color comes into your mind when Harry is mentioned? Red.

77. What color comes into your mind when Draco is mentioned? Green

78. Is this quiz getting boring and too long? Nope I like it.

79. If you got hold of a bottle of Felix Felicis, what would you drink it for? (Note: it makes you lucky in everything and everything you do won't go wrong.) My exams.

80. Do you like the books more or the movies? Books, I don't like the movies much. I hate the actor who plays Sirius.

81. Who's your favorite out of the Marauders? Sirius

82. What would your Patronus take shape in? Wolf, Fox, Raven, or Cat

83. What would be your Animagus form? Fox.

84. What subject do you want to be the best in? Potions. (The possiblies...you could make Voldemort a pasifist...)

This or that:

85. Sirius Black or Remus Lupin? Sirius Black

86. Severus Snape or Sirius Black? Sirius Black

87. Hermione or Cho? Hermione.

88. James Potter or Snape? This ones kind of hard...James I suppose...

89. Hagrid or Snape? Snape.

90. The Marauders or The Trio? The Marauders Forever

91. Ability to become Invisible or become an Animagus? Both

92. Harry or Ron? Harry

93. Fleur or Tonks? Tonks

94. Hermione or Ginny? Hermione

95. Cedric Diggory or Viktor Krum? Viktor

96. Luna Lovegood or Cho Chang? Luna

97. Dumbledore or Peeves the Poltergeist? Peeves (I have a better chance of survival)

98. Aragog (Hagrid's dead spider) or Grawp (Hagrid's giant brother)? Grawp

99. Zonko's Joke Shop or Honeydukes? Honeydukes

100. Bertie Botts' Every Flavour Beans or Chocolate Frogs? Chocolate Frogs

101. Death Eaters or Aurors? Aurors...I guess...

102. Dumbledore or Voldemort? > Voldemort...the world may be a safer place...besides...genepool purification might not be a bad idea...if it's only stupid people...

103. Bellatrix Lestrange or Narcissa Malfoy? Narcissa

104. Would you rather go through the first task or the third task in the Triwizard Tournament? Third

105. Is this survey fun or boring? Fun

Number your 12 fave Naruto characters (In no order) and answer the questions!

1. Naruto

2. Itachi

3. Gaara

4. Sakura

5. Hinata

6. Neji

7. Anko

8. Temari

9. Kakashi

10. Tenten

11. Sai

12. Deidara

1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fanfic before?

Sai/Neji...um...yeah...that's creepy...

2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

Um...I'm a girl, and Sakura's a girl...no

3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant

Deidara and Temari would have a very scary child.

4) Do you recall any fics about Nine?

No, not anyones that I like

5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?

Neji/Itachi...no

6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten?

Neither

7) Make up a summary of a Three/Ten fic.

He thought that she was beautiful when he first saw her attacks in the Exams. She was untamed, precise, deadly, and she would not take anything from anyone. She spoke to him after the retrevial. She was lovely, concerned, and gentle. He met her again on a mission to deliver him a message. He was determined to marry her.

8) Is there any such thing as a One/Eight fluff?

Naruto/Temari, yes I've seen it.

9) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic.

Of Dango Sticks and True Art

10) What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One?

Um...actually that's kind of scary... I'd have Sakura accidently be hit by some experimental Jutsu and have her start stalking Naruto. It would probably be humor. Just because Naruto's so dense, and Sakura would be scary...

11) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?

I haven't asked.

12) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?

No, I'm one of the only people who likes him...

13) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five

No.

14) What might ten scream at a moment of great passion?

I'M GOING TO TURN YOU INTO A PINCUSHIN!

15) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?

Bimbo by Lambretta where she walked in on Ino trying to flirt with Shika, get it wrong, and get mad.

16) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

WARNING: The writer is possessed so the fic has yaoi and is probably horrible.

17) What might be a good pick-up line for Ten use on two?

Your gaze has me breathless (get it? Itachi can kill a person using the Mangekyo? Dead? Breathless?)

18) How might Eleven describe a relationship between Two and Eight?

It's hard to say who wears the pants...

19) How emo is Seven?

Not emo.

Things I Must Not (Must) do at Hogwarts

1.I will not sing "we're off to see the wizard" when sent to the Headmaster's office.

2. I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class. It will not get me extra credit.

3. Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda.

4. I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his "time of the month", no matter how sympathetic I think I am to the situation.

5. I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my older brother's old Calculus book.

6. I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music when wandering the halls. Nor am i allowed to use the theme from Mission Impossible.

7. I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.

8. "Draco Malfoy, Is My Snuggle Bunny" is not an acceptable quidditch chant.

9. I will not dress up as Voldemort for Halloween. Or Lucius Malfoy. Or Hitler.

10. Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.

11. Bringing fortune cookies to Divinations class does not count as extra credit.

12. I will not attempt to magically animate my marshmallow peeps. Why Chocolate Frogs are allowed and not these is beyond me.

13. I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintball.

14. I will not wear A MUDBLOOD AND PROUD OF IT shirt to DE meetings and act surprised when they attack me.

15. I will not tell first years that they should build a tree-house in the whomping willow

16. I will not use silencing charms on my professors.

17. I will not scream bloody murder everytime I see Filch

18. I will not ride around hogwarts in an uncontrollable cart going really fast with no breaks, and chase Snape around while causing general chaos.

19. I will not throw a surprise party for Snape and write him romantic poems no matter how much I think he needs a hug.

20. I will not purposefully run face on into every wall I see.

21. I will not make popping sounds with my mouth(like Donky from Shrek)and laugh when the teacher gives you a funny look.

22. I will not look at the ceiling for along time, and when I see other people looking at the ceiling too, trying to figure it out, say "What are you looking at?".

23. I will not grimace painfully while smacking my forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!" while around the younger students.

24. I will not answer the professors' questions with meows.

25. I will not draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other students that this is my "personal space."

36. I will not get a black dog, name it Grim, and take it to Divination class.

27. I will not invent a cereal. There are no such thing as Voldios, and they are not magically delicious.

28. I will not yell "Pick me! Pick me!" when Snape hands out detentions.

29. I will not sing The Song That Never Ends. While drunk. In the Great Hall. To the first years..

30. I will not wait for Snape to run away from me to yell "Why are you doing this, Severus? YOU KNOW THIS IS YOUR BABY!"

31. I will not send Snape love notes signed "Wormtail"."

32. When called upon in class, I will not insist that the correct answer is 42

33. I will not add "according to the prophecy" to raise my Divination grade (though that could work)

34. I will not tell Muggleborn first-years that Bertie Bott's Every-Flavor Beans taste better if you them all at once

35. Im not allowed to bother Snape and Dumbledore does not do "naked time"

36. I will not sing "Defying Gravity" during Quidditch practice

37. The four houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Brainiacs and the Junior Death Eaters.

38. My headmasters name is Albus Dumbledore, not Gandalf

39. Yelling "to infinity and beyond" was only funny the first time I took off from my broom.

40. I will refrain from calling Fred and George - Merry and Pippin, Harry and Ron - Frodo and Sam, and it probably isnt smart to call Draco Legolas either.

41. Telling Draco to "make like a ferret and bounce" is always a bad idea.

42. When Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout “To the Batmobile, Robin”

43. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of the fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

44. No matter how creepy and abandoned some of the towers are, I will not find Johnny Depp with scissors for hands in any of them.

45. I will not tickle the sleeping dragon “just to see what happens”

46. I am not allowed out of my dorm when visitors from the Ministry are here

47. I will not refer to the DADA profs or Gryffindors as “Red shirts”

48. I will not sweep the Gryffindor common room with Harry’s prized Firebolt

49. I will not scare the First years with wild tales of an omniscient Author who controls our very destinies.

50. Making a Polyjuice Potion and walking up to the person I copied to make them act crazy/ act like a human mirror is not funny

51. Ron Weasley does not appreciate being called “Boy Wonder” and he definitely does not want to wear green tights

52. Putting a Snitch in Malfoy’s pants really isn’t funny, even if it does make him scream like a girl.

53. Putting fake spiders in Ron’s bed is certainly not funny, especially when he tries to jump out the window.

54. I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their House colors indicate that they are "covered in bees".

55. No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can produce, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

56. Growing marijuana (or weed for everyone else) is not an extra credit project for Herbology. Although it might win the war if I can get Voldemort addicted.

57. "I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.

58. The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball

59. I will not use Umbridge's quill to write "Let me out".

60. I will stop referring to showering as "giving Moaning Myrtle an eyeful".

61. Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept.

62. House elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers

63. The Forbidden Forest is forbidden for a reason.

64. Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar.

65. I will not lick Trevor. or kiss him. Even if he could turn into a Prince. It might be Snape anyways, and he wouldn't be too happy with me.

66. Calling Lucius Malfoy "Luscious Mouthful" is just plain gross.

67. I will not change the password to the prefects' bath to "Makes getting clean almost as much fun as getting dirty".

68. There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong.

69. It is a bad idea to tell Professor Snape/McGonagall s/he takes himself too seriously.

70. I will not ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

71. I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

72. Tricking a school house elf into stripping does not mean that they are now mine, even if I yell "Pwned!"

73. Speaking like Yoda, does not a happy professor make. Funny, it is not.

74. During the Spring Annual Good vs. Evil Match I will not raise my wand in the air and yell “THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!”

75. “Ooh ee oo ah ah ting tang walla walla bing bang is not a spell.

76. I am not a sloth Animagus.

77. I am aloud to have a toad, rat, cat, or owl. I am not, however, allowed to have a reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or a piranha.

78. I do not weigh the same as a duck

79. I will stop asking my Arithemancy teacher what the square root of -1 is.

80. Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul are completely coincidental

81. Professor Flitwick does not wish to be addressed to as: Admiral Naismith or Mon Capitan or Napoleon.

82. Asking a Gryffindor, How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense? and walking away is only funny the FIRST time.

83. 42 is not the only answer to every questing on the OWLS

84. I am not allowed to owl suspected Death Eaters a list of Evil Overlords.

85. I will not offer to make tandoori owl.

86. I will stop asking Snape when we will make Love Potion No. 9

87. Sirius Black did not found the Sirius Cybernetics Corp.

88. My name is not Captain Subtext

89. I cannot Hadoken anything into oblivion.

90. I am not the Defense Against Boring Classes professor.

91. I am not allowed to use the words pimp cane in front of Draco.

92. It is generally accepted that cats and dragons cannot interbreed, and I should not attempt to disprove this theory no matter how wicked the outcome would be.

93. Gryffindor courage does not come in bottles labeled Firewhiskey.

94. Using the Engorgio charm on certain parts of the human anatomy is not permitted on school grounds, not even for entertainment purposes.

95. First years are not to be fed to fluffy.

96. A wand is for magic. Not for picking noses, playing snooker, or practicing my drum playing no matter how bored I become.

97. I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in potions class

98. First years should not be encouraged to befriend the Whomping Willow.

99. Novelty and Holiday themed ties are not appropriate for school uniform.

100. I will not use my socks to make hand puppets of the Slytherin house mascot

101. I should not refer the DADA teachers as the canaries in the coalmine.

102. I will restrain myself from saying: Dude, get a life. When facing Lord Voldemort.

103. I am not allowed to place muggle fairytale books under the history section of the library.

104. There is not now, nor will there ever be a fifth house at Hogwarts. I am not a member of this house, or the founder.

105. I will not refer using the Accio charm as Using the force.

106. Albus Dumbledores proper title is Headmaster, not: The Gandalf Wannabe

107. I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I prophesized her death.

108. I will not use Gryffindors and Slytherins as Christmas decorations.

109. Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel and sick joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists.

110. If asked in class what the Avada Kadavra curse does yelling, IT DOES DEATH!! I not the appropriate response.

111. I am not allowed out of my dorm when visitors from the Ministry are here.

112. Ravenclaws do not in any circumstance find a sign saying: The library is closed for an indefinite time. Amusing in any sense.

113. I will not try to recreate the Key of Time in Transfiguration class.

114. A time turner is not a flux capacitator, and I will not install one in one of my muggle cars.

115. I am not allowed to use any silencing charms on my Professors.

116. I will not set Hermiones time turner to rotate every half hour.

117. If the thought of a spell causes me to giggle for more than 15 consecutive seconds, I must assume that I am not aloud to use it.

118. I will not refer my X-files videos to be: Auror Training Videos.

119. When being interrogated by the staff, I am not allowed to wave my hand and announce, These are not the droids you are looking for.

120. Albus Dumbledore is not the devil.

121. I am not authorized to negotiate a peace treaty with Voldemort.

122. I will not follow potion instructors in reverse just to see what happens.

123. I am not to claim that there is a prequel to Hogwarts, one that explains the about Bilbo Baggins.

124. I will not, under any circumstance, ask Harry Potter who died and declared him boss.

125. I am not allowed to refer Susan Bones, Hanna Abbot, and Justin Finch-Fletchley as Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles.

126. I will not cast the occasional Obliviate spell on Dumbledore, even though it would be amusing.

127. I am not allowed to give the Gryffindors Pixie Stix.

128. I will not lock the Gryffindors and Slytherins in a room and make bets on which House will come out alive.

129. I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him that they are, in fact, real animals.

130. I will not teach the house elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks.

131. I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin Quidditch matches.

132. I will not douse Harry Potters invisibility cloak with lemon juice to see if he becomes visible when walking in front of the fire in the common room.

133. I will not tell the first years that Moon Prism Power is the basic spell for Transfiguration.

134. I will not yell, Believe it. OR NOT! in random parts of Dumbledores speeches.

135. My name is not Dark Lord Happy Pants and I am not allowed to sign my papers as such.

136. There is no such thing as the Chamber of Double Secret Probation.

137. I will not try to magically animate my marshmallow peeps.

138. Never ask Harry if is Scar Senses are tingling.

139. Voldemort is not Gonandorf and the Triforce is not hidden in Hogwarts.

140. I am not to sing the entire Multiplication Rock, song during Arithmancy exams.

141. I will not charm the suites of armor in the Great Hall to do a reenactment of the musical number, Were knights of the Round Table. For the Christmas Feast.

142. I will not refer Professor McGonagall as: McGoogles.

143. I am not aloud to make lightsaber noises with my wand.

144. Wearing my DEATH EATER AND PROUD OF IT shirt to school is not a good idea

145. I am not allowed to recreate famous battles of the Revolutionary War in the Charms corridor.

146. I am not to declare an official: Hug a Slytherin day.

147. I am not to refer myself as Tim the Enchanter to first years.

148. I am not Xena: Warrior Princess and I shall not use my war cries every time I enter a classroom.

149. It is not necessary to yell, BAM! every time I apparate.

150. I am not allowed to commandeer Gryffindors sword from Dumbledores office and use it to patrol the hallways.

151. I cannot sing Attack of the Killer Tomatoes theme song during Herbology.

152. I am not allowed to pain the house elves blue and refer to them as smurfs.

153. I will not organize the Hogwarts Fight Club

154. It is a bad idea to tell Snape that he takes himself too seriously.

155. I will not tell first years that Snape is the voice of God.

156. I will not dress up as a Dementor and use a dust buster to use on Harrys lips to try to convince him to do what I want.

157. I will not start food fights in the Great Hall

158. To conquer the earth with my army of flying monkeys is apparently not the best career option..

159. The Whomping Willow is not an Entwife

160. It is not necessary to yell, Oooo BURN! every time Snape takes points from Gryffindor.

161. Yall check this bad boy out! is not the appropriate way to announce that you are about to perform an experimental spell.

162. I will not hold my wand up in the air before casting a spell and shout, I have the power!

163. I am not the king of the potato people and I do not have a flying carpet.

164. Getting everyone in the Great Hall to do a time warp will not get me extra house points.

165. I will not tell Sir Cadogan that the knights who say Ni have challenged him to a duel and have students say Ni while hiding about the corridor

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and sit back and smirk as everyone wonders just how the heck you managed it

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isnt for you

If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door

The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on

I'm smiling. That really should scare you.

Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience

Someday, we'll look on this, laugh nervously and change the subject

I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me

Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them

Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas

If I had any dignity that would have been humiliating.

That which does not kill me had better run pretty dang fast.

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

When in doubt, push random buttons!

Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter

If you can't beat the computer at chess, try kickboxing.

When you talk to God, that's religion. When God talks to you, that's psychotic.

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

Last night I was looking up at the stars when suddenly I wondered..."Dude, where the heck's my ceiling?"

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

They say guns don't kill people; people do. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled 'BANG!' I don't think you'd kill many people...

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking

He who laughs last thinks slowest

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work

I'm not cynical, I just see things the way they are

I respect your opinion, I just think it's stupid

It's not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

A clear conscience is usually a sign of memory loss.

There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots.

The secret to success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’re good

I'm not as dumb as you look

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

Sarcasm is one more free service we offer.

I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.

Anything thrown hard enough should hurt.

Flying is simple, you just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Some say the glass is half full, some say it's half empty, I say, "Are you gonna drink that?"

When I was born, I was so shocked that I didn't talk for a year and a half.

Where there's a will...I want to be in it.

Do not disturb, I'm disturbed already.

The trouble with life, is there's no background music.

I couldn't repair you brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A clean house is a sign of a broken computer!

Do not walk behind me for I may not lead, do not walk in front of me for I will not follow. If you want to walk besides me, go far it, but don't expect a big reaction...

For people who like peace and quiet: Get a PHONELESS CORD!

I don't get even, I get odder.

I have a photographic memory, but it takes a day to develop.

I've learned from my mistakes, and I'm sure I could repeat them exactly, if it's worth it.

Light travels faster than sound. That is why...some people seem bright until you hear them speak.

You have the right to remain silent, anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

An optimist is someone who falls off the empire state building and after 50 floors says "So far so good!"

If Fed ex and UPS merge, they would be called Fed UP.

Chaos, panic, pandemonium, my work here is done.

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

Love me, Hate me, make a voodoo doll of me and stick it full of pins, I will continue to be indifferent to you.

To be alone is to be different; to be different is to be alone.

The beatings will cease once moral improves.

Excuse me while I find a container for my joy.

People who think they know everything annoy those of us who do.

Laws to live by:

Murphy's law: 1. If anything can go wrong, it will." 2. "If there's more than one possible outcome of a job or task, and one of those outcomes will result in disaster or an undesirable consequence, then somebody will do it that way" 3. "Whatever can go wrong will go wrong, and at the worst possible time, in the worst possible way."

Godwin's Rule of Nazi Analogies: As a discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches one.

Hanlon's razor: 1. Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. 2. Never assume malice when stupidity will suffice.

Amara's Law: "We tend to overestimate the effect of a technology in the short run and underestimate the effect in the long run.

Benford's law of controversy: The Passion of an agruement is inversely proportional to the amount of real information available.

Dilbert Principal: The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management.

Gall's Law: "A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that worked."

Herblock's Law: If it's good, they'll stop making it.

Hutber's Law: "Improvement means deterioration".

Littlewood's Law: Individuals can expect a miracle to happen to them at the rate of about one per month.

Meadow's Law: One is a tragedy, two is suspicious and three is murder, until proved otherwise.

Muphry's Law: If you write anything criticizing editing or proofreading, there will be a fault of some kind in what you have written.

Okrent's Law: The pursuit of balance can create imbalance because sometimes something is true.

Parkingson's Law:Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.

Peter's Principle: In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.

Reilly's Law: People generally patronize the largest mall in the area.

Roemer's Law: A hospital bed built is a bed filled

Rothbard's Law: Everyone specializes in his own area of weakness.

Sayre's Law: "In any dispute the intensity of feeling is inversely proportional to the value of the stakes at issue." By way of corollary, the law adds: "That is why academic politics are so bitter."

Schneier's Law: Any person can invent a security system so clever that she or he can't think of how to break it.

Segal's Law A man with a watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure."

Skitt's Law: a corollary of Muphry's law, variously expressed as "any post correcting an error in another post will contain at least one error itself" or "the likelihood of an error in a post is directly proportional to the embarrassment it will cause the poster."

Stigler's Law: No scientific discovery is named after its original discoverer.

Sturgeon's Revelation: 90 percent of everything is crap.

Sutton's Law: Go where the money is.

Wiener's Law: There are no answers, only cross-references.

Please look at my stories, read the stories and authors on my favs lists, and enjoy yourself.