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darklove4ever
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beta: β Beta Reader Profile
email: Email
since: 03-19-07, id: 1241510, Profile Updated: 08-27-09
country: United States
Author has written 25 stories for Twilight, Fruits Basket, Vampire Knight, and Naruto.

Hello, lovelies. This is a first-ever update! Verbose is Dead.

Long live the typist!

My profilelette mourns for its old self, but it will get on with it...eventually...maybe never.


Basic Interrogation.

Because I'm sure one of my readers desires to be in the F.B.I.

Name: Alexa

DOB: Somewhere in time...

DOD:To be Announced...Prefferably before I get wrinkles (Sickly twisted, that is me.)

Eye Color: Amber. Possibly ocher...ha-ha.

Hair Color:Dirty blonde. I've crossed over to the D.S.

Alternate Names: 90's Freak, Miss Alexa

Favorite twisted quote: "The Hills are alive with the Sound of Satan." (Made by guess-who.)

The Scene.

What I'm Into:"Indie". I used to go Goth like a rebel, but now I've replaced the black and red striped tights with an Indie shag and Birkenstocks, but still with a healthy dose of REBEL.

Where I Shop At: The Mall. Ha. No, really. (Actually, I 'dig' Urban Outfitters and weird stores you only find in states beside mine that do not suck to hell.)

What I read A Lot. More specifically, slutty girl novels like A-list, and classic novels like The Catcher in the Rye. I'm a library nerd. Tried to apply to work there, but the Dewy Decimal-whatsit claimed that I was mentally insufficient. Damn you, Dewy...

What I like:Not much. It's not easy to get me to actually say 'I like _'. For the purpose of my pro-fi, I'll say...Nature, drawing, art, writing, books, Japan, aviator glasses, philosophy, and travel.

What I hate: A lot. Some included on my three-page long list are: stickers, cologne, buses, lakes, Bush administration, NRA, bad movies, sticky movie theatre floors, junk food, unsanitary gym equip., followers, 'white' sheep (I'm the black one), the Mall (evil in a strip of land), and Hummers. Especially Hummers.


F i c t i o n s.

I could kick myself.

Really, I could...

But my legs are too long.

I grew an inch and a half! Hoorah.

Anyway.

I'll be updating whenever inspiration strikes, which could mean:

A.) A really long time, or-

B.) Soon, if it just, you know, does.

My apologies are sent out to everyone waiting for these popular, rarely updated fictions:

1 - Vampire Boy Meets Gothic Girl

I never knew that this stupid plot line could attract so many readers that are like devoted spouses to an abusive husband. The husband meaning me, the authoress, also known as the AWOL writer because I disappear to go off and let loose...meaning, watch Degrassi TNG on my pathetic downsize-me flatscreen. Manny was the original Britney, you know. But back to the story- I outlined a plot for chapter 6, but I lack the brain power to write it. If I try, don't shoot me for it sucking terribly.

2 - Jacob Black Hate Club

Thank you my dearies! Not to channel Billy Corgan too much, but honestly, my readers of the Hate Club are so close to me. I have such respect for your Ness in the Hate department. I get tons of fan mail aka reviews about the Club that I'll try to make up something in my old emo-esque poetry notebook whenever I possibly can. Excuse my use of the word 'emo', but I used to be a Gothic girl and found them to be so...loud.

3 - Undying Love

I pretty much gave up on this without like, actually admitting it. Well, I sort of did right now, so...I'm sorry. I don't have any idea if anyone still cares about 'Isabella's diary', so maybe this whole story will go to hell unless I finish it with three chapters or less. Which is just not even flipping possible due to the elaborate story line I had in my head. I'll see what I can do. Shrugs on bullet proof vest for safety precautions with angry readers.


M I S C.

Et ceteras that don't actually count. X3

Part A.

Song-fest.

I live for music, after art. So it's only fair I give it a Part and a terrifically awful title. Song-fest?!FTW. It's 11:45.

Best songs that are on my iPhone whenever the 3G hasn't eaten away the stupid battery:

-- "Luna" by The Smashing Pumpkins. I'm not a lovey-dove but this song brings back the '70s somehow.

-- "Rape Me" by Nirvana. Maybe it's because Kurt somehow managed to include the vile, le-gasp! word 'rape' into the song dozens of times, or maybe it's because of the deep rebel edge.

-- "I Think That I Would Die" by Hole. Bow down to Court! This is the holy of Grunge. Well, maybe not, but it's a great song.

-- "Bull in the Heather" by Sonic Youth. Tell me that you wanna whore me. No, seriously.

-- "Maps" by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. Karen O. is my Indie Goddess.

-- "Hole in the Earth" by the Deftones.An Obsession group of mine. How dare that stupid Underworld prequel for making a Renholder remix out of this song!!

Part B.

Melancholy Month-by-Month.

A depressing yet darkly humorous monthly account of my 'Life'. Channeling Angela much...? (See: My So-Called Life way back when.)

AUGUST: Month of Migraines and Wire Baskets.

It's back to school, and I can't help but feel Cheez-it vomit in the back of my throat when I watch Five Star commercials that show everyone drumming pencils against ugly looking notebooks that are like, eight dollars each. Maybe it's just those gross cheezy crackers but I really don't think so.

I'm going to a different school this year. Fun? Maybe. Possibly since I won't have to see the same drones I was forced to be with in classes and the science block for the past few years. I feel like a prisoner coming off Alcatraz or something. Glorious freedom from the Airhead Colony!!

Went to Staples and got a wiry basket that almost poked out my eye for school papers. Also, a reoccuring evil migraine has been in my head for DAYS. Bloody hell. I am british, you know.

So to everyone as August comes to a close: Merry Back-to-School-Mas. It will suck.

Part C.

New Stuff.

--August 27th:

I am considering changing my pen name from DARKLOVE4EVER to VEGANVAMPIRE. I am a Twilight fan, thank God from 2006, so I feel like I should give my heart and soul, or at least my pen name to the Cullens by showing how I am truly vegan-like.

--August 28th:

It's disgusting how this flipping H1N1 is taking over our sad little world. Thankfully I am in online school now, and I'll be a safe hermit from the icky school goers. I am staying in and hibernating from September to March. If I MUST leave the house I'm taking a bag of Lysol wipes and a hospital/dental mask with me. Bollocks, this is too much to handle. Even worse than when I got the regular flu shot and went off the handle from it.

Also: still pondering over pen name change...

Come back soon, my children of the corn :3

-Missy Alexa


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

1. The Guide to New York's Rich and Famous » reviews
Bella Swan is a Townie girl who moved from WA to NYC's Upper East side. With everyone against her and looking down at her, Bella might just have to make herself over into beauty with the help of a guide and new BFFs to step up to healthy competition. BXE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 12,290 - Reviews: 74 - Updated: 10-13-09 - Published: 12-12-07
2. Vampire Boy meets Gothic Girl » reviews
Bella Swan wears her sorrow as she takes abuse from her father, Charlie, and people assume she's a strange Goth in prejudicial Forks, but that's not the truth. Edward Cullen and his coven return from Alaska, though he hates it. Two worlds collide...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,964 - Reviews: 149 - Updated: 9-19-09 - Published: 11-4-07 - Bella & Edward
3. Jackass Dares With the Cullens » reviews
You think Jackass is bad? One-shots about Bella & the Cullens doing dares with cow tipping, pissed off bulls, giant balls, escalator sliding, velcro trucks, and human rockets that pay tribute to the best dare devils. R/R/.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,953 - Reviews: 30 - Updated: 8-21-09 - Published: 11-21-07
4. Lament » reviews
Sakura let out a shaky breath, timidly touching her stomach. "Hello, Baby. . .I'm sorry that I haven't been around." It's beautiful blur, yet nothing seems real. In life you're never ready for anything. SasuSaku. R/R.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,217 - Reviews: 10 - Updated: 8-21-09 - Published: 5-21-09 - Sakura H. & Sasuke U.
5. Flawless » reviews
For Isabella Swan, the only outlet to relieve her pain of loss is bulimia. When her father finds out about her problem, she's forced to go to a Self-Help Group and she meets Edward Mason, a boy who seems flawless but is not. All Human. R/R. C4 is up.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 15,212 - Reviews: 48 - Updated: 8-11-09 - Published: 5-15-08 - Bella & Edward
6. The Au Pairs reviews
Who wants to spend the summer before college working as an au pair? Alice and Bella are two nannies for 3 bratty children, with nothing to do but pick up toys and cater to all their whims. But can the 3rd au pair Edward Mason make summer hotter? AU. R/R.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,705 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 6-24-09 - Bella & Edward
7. From Eggs To Apples » reviews
Akatsuki-AU: In a boring city like Konoha, all they have is each other. "Ab ovo usque ad mala" - from beginning to end. We watch our lives pass us by in blurs. Pein's fiery hair, old nose rings, cover up, and lisptick that matches Konan's eyes. One-shots.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 897 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 6-18-09 - Published: 6-17-09 - Konan & Pein
8. This Temporary Life reviews
Sometimes things happen that make no sense. Haruno Sakura wonders, why couldn't things have stayed the same? Now her family is broken, and her Former Friends don't act the same. Then she meets Ino Yamanaka, and coping is no longer a secret. E.D. fic. R/R
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,341 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6-7-09 - Sakura H.
9. Never Forget reviews
Planet Earth is a very cruel and bitter place. “Oh, you mean Haruno Sakura? She’s the girl who was driving that car that got Yamanaka Ino killed.” We never know who we really are, especially when 'empty' means 'strong'. SasuSaku. Read/Review.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,471 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 5-30-09 - Sakura H. & Sasuke U.
10. Sickness reviews
When Naruto is half-posioned by air freshener and Sasuke is his metrosexual-bat-thing nurse. A crack fic. R.R. Bizarre humor one-shot.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 675 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 5-22-09 - Naruto U. & Sasuke U. - Complete
11. Speak » reviews
Isabella Swan is a silent Outcast at Forks High School, drifting alone and constantly hated after breaking up a party by calling the cops last summer. She rarely speaks, but Edward Cullen's arrival helps her reveal the horrific truth of that night. BXE.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,059 - Reviews: 47 - Updated: 5-9-09 - Published: 3-24-09 - Bella
12. Edward and Bella's Infinite Playlist » reviews
Edward: Please, do one thing for me, and I'll never go near you ever again- be my girlfriend for the next ten minutes, okay?: Bella: I answer his question by wrapping my hands around his and bringing his face close to mine for one quick kiss. Read&review.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,370 - Reviews: 27 - Updated: 2-5-09 - Published: 4-25-08
13. For Now reviews
Are you happy?" It was a simple question, her eyes filled with curiosity, trying to decode the world. Uchiha Sasuke, on the anniversary of his suicide, recounts his Final Day on Earth and the girl named Sakura who made him say "For now." AU. SasuSaku.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,858 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2-1-09 - Sasuke U. & Sakura H. - Complete
14. Forks High Newspaper » reviews
Emmett and Alice run Forks high school's first ever, totally awesomeish newspaper! Emmett is editor in chief, writing about totally randomness like exploding pies, pan flutes, and Spongebob. Alice is the fashion girl & article diva! Review for more.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 7,494 - Reviews: 37 - Updated: 11-20-08 - Published: 11-24-07
15. The Leech Diaries reviews
With a Headmaster "father", a hormonal Bonnie partner in crime for a friend, a roomate who has Steven Tyler screams and a Math Book Mountain, and a crush that will never become anything like in 90210, Yuki Cross chronicles her life trying to win her love.
Vampire Knight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,022 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10-6-08 - Yuuki
16. Say What ? » reviews
What would happen if Edward said 'IDK, my BFF Jill' or, if Bella said, 'Let's get some shoes! ' Here is a fanfiction based on the crazy, insane, and slightly bizarre things our favorite Twilight saga characters would never say. Chapter 4- Rose- is here!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,235 - Reviews: 45 - Updated: 9-26-08 - Published: 3-31-08
17. Footsteps In The Snow » reviews
100 serious, romantic, light, and comical drabbles centered around Fruits Basket couple, Machi and Yuki. Includes shorties about pepper spray on Kakeru, burning hate mail and yearbooks, school trip memories, detention and cute notes, and more. 20 is up.
Fruits Basket - Rated: T - English - Romance/General - Chapters: 20 - Words: 3,441 - Reviews: 37 - Updated: 5-8-08 - Published: 5-5-08 - Yuki S. & Machi K.
18. Ivory White » reviews
Poem one-shots featuring the emotional spectrum of the Twilight saga's characters, telling of depression, love, devotion, and loss. Read of Bella's love for Edward, Alice and Jasper's yin and yang relationship, and Rosalie's need for Emmett. Read & Review
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/General - Chapters: 8 - Words: 3,058 - Reviews: 25 - Updated: 4-7-08 - Published: 4-5-08
19. The Twilight Obsession fan club » reviews
Are you obsessed with Twilight? Do you dream about Edward? Do you wish you were Bella? Do you wish Edward could come into your window at night like he does in the book series? Join the official Twilight fan club, made for true fans. Review to be a member.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,692 - Reviews: 173 - Updated: 3-31-08 - Published: 11-9-07
20. The Twilight Zone » reviews
Jesus Christ Superstar? Rocky Road ice cream like ding-dongs? Papasan chairs and plank hair? Welcome to the Twilight Zone, starring our favorite Twilight characters in funny, random one-shots. Read and Review for chapter four! Three is now posted. R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,091 - Reviews: 15 - Updated: 3-8-08 - Published: 2-19-08
21. Summer Hearts » reviews
Bella: I'm with Trevor, but why does Edward look so good? Rosalie: Emmett left me and I cant let go. Will we ever be together again? Alice: I want to be with Jasper, but why is he pushing me away? 1 summer, 3 girls, & 3 boys equals love, hate, and drama.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 26,209 - Reviews: 86 - Updated: 2-13-08 - Published: 9-26-07
22. Jacob Black hate club » reviews
I never liked Jacob Black, not ever. Join me if you hate Jake black with a passion. Includes short stories, reasons to hate, and hate scenarios. Read and review if Jake is your least favorite character! The rage continues: C13 is up! LOVERS STAY OUT.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 12,282 - Reviews: 406 - Updated: 2-12-08 - Published: 10-26-07
23. Undying Love: Isabella's diary » reviews
Isabella Swan is a rebellious, carefree teenager in 1917. Her mother, who is always complaining about her not being 'ladylike', falls in love with Mr. Black, and Isabella hates his son. Then she meets Edward Masen and falls in love. Read and review plz!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 19,172 - Reviews: 85 - Updated: 12-15-07 - Published: 11-6-07
24. A bittersweet love » reviews
Bella is a emotionally scarred teenager who starts her life over in Forks with her father, hiding her true self from everyone. She vows to not grow too attached to anyone so she can't hurt them, but Edward Cullen comes into her life and she falls in love.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 29,652 - Reviews: 72 - Updated: 11-4-07 - Published: 8-29-07
25. He's in love with my Gym shorts » reviews
This is the funny, weird diary of Isabella Swan as she tries to win Edward Cullen's heart. But will their love withstand Jess, Slutty Debbie, Mike Newton, Bella's bizzare family, and social class? Read and review, please. T for sadly humorous angst. R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 24,924 - Reviews: 67 - Updated: 10-28-07 - Published: 9-6-07
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