My name is Commodore Chillidog

My favourite fanfics are about Pirates of the Caribbean- my favourite character is James Norrington

Jack: I found a jellybean!

Will: No Jack NO!!

(snatches jellybean away from Jack)

Elizabeth: What are you on about Will?

Jack: Yeah! I was just about to eat that!!

Will: This isn't just ANY jellybean! It's a magical jellybean that can destroy the entire world if anybody eats it!!

(a long silence follows)

Elizabeth: I think all those squid-fingers you eat must have gone to your head.

Will (frowns): Fine, (continues to grumble) blow up the world, see if I care

Jack (snatches back the jellybean): Goodbye cruel world! Goodbye!

James: Hey guys,

(The characters mumble hello, scuffing feet on ground and looking at their dirty fingernails)

James: What are you doing on Commodore Chillidog's profile?

Will: Jack's about to blow up the world- and this appears to be the best place to do it is all

(Jack starts to eat the jellybean)

James: Blow up the world? But I have a new phase going on! I throw about jellybeans that turn people into kitty cats!

Elizabeth: How the hell is that your new phase? That does not make any sense!! That's not even worth doing!!

(Jack begins to splutter)

Will: ...Jack...Are you okay?

Jack: No! My world is beginning to shrink! I can feel myself grow a tail! my senses are becoming more feline!

James: Oh no! He's eaten one of my jellybeans! Quickly! You must get on all fours and begin to meow to reverse the spell! It's the only way!

(Jack gets on all fours)

Elizabeth: Quickly! I think I see a tail growing!

Will: Er...I don't think that's a tail

(Awkward silence as the naughty joke dawns on Elizabeth)

Jack: Meow!! Meow!! It's not working!!

James: Put on this bonnet! Suck on this dummy! And let me take a picture! I do it all the time with my cats!

(Jack puts on a frilly pink bonnet and starts sucking dummy and lets James take a picture. James begins to subtly walk away)

Jack: Am I human again?

Elizabeth: You haven't even turned into a cat!

Will: (blinks) This story is becoming more stupid by the minute...Hey...Where's James?

(The pirates and the cat-man turn around to see a billboard with the picture of Jack wearing a pink frilly bonnet, sucking a dummy and on all fours. They realise that James is missing...)

Will: Now that is quite embarrassing, after all this time James has finally gotten his revenge on Jack for ruining his life.

Jack: So...I'm NOT turning into a cat?

Elizabeth: Well that's a relief, and it's a good thing the world didn't explode either.

Will: I'm sick of jellybeans- let's all have some squid-fingers

(so the pirates all joined hands and walked out of Commodore Chillidog's profile to get some squid-fingers)

That was just a short story to make this profile seem a bit more interesting by the way.

>3 Commodore Chillidog >3