A proud member of the Sue Slayers
Oh, I type stuff now...
Quote of the week/day/month/whenever I can be bothered to change it: "Maybe we can attack them together!" Ross, off the Friends episode where Rachel and Phoebe take self defense classes.
ANNOUNCEMENT!! ANNOUNCEMENT!! FREAKING IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!! TWILIGHT MOVIE 12-12-08, THE TRAILER IS ON YOUTUBE, PEOPLE!! IT'S UP THERE!! IT'S HAPPENING!!
end announcement.
Who am I?
The Short Answer...
I am me. Hi.
Who am I?
The Long Answer...
Well, sup? My name's Nicola, but I prefer Nic. Or 'You', or Eppy, or Epitome, or O Ace One, or 'You, the One who's reading!' I do not answer to Mary, Sue, Knight of Ni or Beanpole. Sadly enough, I do answer to 'Stupid.'
I'm also prone to sarcasm, humor slightly above that of most of my friends and occasionally going completely and utterly insane, screaming about purple weasels and how my feet are going to take over DE VORLD!!
So you can hunt me down for updates, I have blue eyes, a big nose, light brown hair with a fringe and I'm really tall and skinny. And I have almost NO fashion sense!! My wardrobe staple is jeans and t-shirt. And some form of jacket, usually a hoodie. A purple one. Like the weasels.
GAH! Weasels!
I live near Melbourne, in Victoria (best state there is) in Australia, and contrary to popular belief, I do not wrestle crocodiles and hang out with kangaroos. I wrestle with bad spelling and hang out with Twilighters. Seriously.
I love Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Panic! At The Disco, Yellowcard, the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Paramore and the Plain White T's, Bond, and for some reason, lately I CAN'T STOP listening to Mozart, Beethoven and John Williams. Oh, and Alvin and the Chipmunks. Love the squeaky little buggers.
My favourite books are Artemis Fowl, Twilight (team Edward!!), Ingo, the Bartimaeus Trilogy, A Series of Unfortunate Events, Harry Potter, Uglies, Pretties, Specials, Extras, Peeps, The Last Days, So Yesterday, Vampirates, Anne Rice books, Jacqueline Wilson books, Roald Dahl, Narnia, Morris Gleitzman, Paul Jennings, Chasing Rainbows, Andy Griffiths, Chasing Rainbows, Maximum Ride, Magic or Madness and heaps more that I can't be bothered to type.
My favourite shows are Naruto, Avatar: The Last Airbender, the Simpsons, Death Note, Futurama, the Chasers War on Everything, Summer Heights High and Thank God You're Here. Unfortunately, I've had to exile myself from the Avatar section, because I've only seen up to where Toph joins the gang, and I keep reading spoilers. Ditto Naruto, and Death Note. Don't blame me, blame stupid Australian free-to-air TV!!
I also looove Princess Mononoke, Spirited Away and Howls Moving Castle. Hayao Miyazaki, you ROCK!
And my hobbies are reading (duh), writing (duh), singing out of tune, playing the clarinet (not very well), drawing really bad manga, criticising things, reviewing fanfics (woah, I'm a dork), irritating the living out of people, reading fanfics and being a total Fangirl-the Artemis Fowl Squee, of course.
Flamers. Feel free to flame me. I'll correct your spelling and send it right back.
You stare because i'm different...( 0.0) ('.'= ) ('.'= ) ('.'= )...I stare because you're all the same.
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MY FICS!!
MESSAGES AND ROMANCE
Much shorter. In science one day, my friend was emailing me as I tried to work. She sounded so much like a bimbo...like Lilli Frond. That night, after I'd put off doing my homework (procrastination is an art, so do it...later.) I sat down and started chatspeaking. I lost my first ever (and later abandoned) plot sheet, wrote the last chapter about eight times, but...
My longest, un-rant, un-OC filled story, was COMPLETE!
Yayness.
MY RANDOM RANT ON MARY SUES
Basically, I was like Hughsey. I lost it. (Aussie in joke) So many bloody Sues clogging up the Fandoms, drowning poor (as I understood it) Edward, Nathaniel and Artemis (Harry was with Draco at the time) So, as this was my pre-Twilight days, I threw Artemis a shining lifeline of raven tresses. And italiangurlinamessedupworld wrote an Edward Sue piece for me, so...Thanks! You is ROCKING!!
And a bunch of chapters (some short, most adequate-ish length) and reviews later, I created the Slayers.
THE SUE SLAYERS
So I'm going to write about the creation of the Sue Slayers. My favourite ever bit of paradology-a study of sueism with a few Fangirls thrown in. And also the most popular thing I've written. EVER!
So basically, I'd been trying to do something about Mary Sues. This was pre-My Random Rant on Mary Sues and everything. So I thought to myself, Nicola the wonderful, I thought, what if there were people who fought Mary Sues? And they used music (this is sounding familiar) what if the leader had been a rescued Sue? (record scratch noise). You see, the leader was named Christy, and lived in a sort of Utopian and Dystopia.
Her world was like a Utopia for Suethors, and it was where Mary Sues were created, in sort of a boarding school.
But then I thought, as I wrote about Christy and her friends, Paige and Matt, that it was a dumbass idea. I had Christy fainting or having to block her ears whenever pop music could be heard, lest she relapse, from an OC to a Sue again. And she did, but Artemis saved her-well, her mind, so she was a super hot Sue Slayer. Like, she had the body of a Sue and the mind of Christy. Yeah. Bad idea, I tells ya. Artemis was bought into their world and I realised I was getting into a pattern with my fics: Artemis is either sucked into a world, or bought someone out of theirs. And I was going in circles.
So I ripped those up. Huzzah!
Then, a few months later I wrote My Random Rant.
And of course, I mention the Slayers in it. Originally, Hannah was yet to be classed (you know, Canonist, Fangirologist, Slayer) and was wondering what to do, when Artemis was kidnapped by Fangirls. Hannah ended up hooking up with the English Matthew Carney, who was much hotter and nicer back then. Still hot, still nice now but not as much.
And it showed Minerva in a bad light, and as a tentative MINAS supporter, not good.
So I abandoned it.
Then Elliot was already shot and they needed a replacement, so in came Hannah.
And then that was abandoned.
Then, as some of you may recall, there was a one chapter thing I published with Hannah in a tree, watching Artemis. It was so long ago, but I'm fairly sure she was a Canonist then...
But of course, I put out the call for ideas, and made some of you guys Slayers...then I asked amaya-black-wings very nicely, and she lent me Ame Shiku, her OC, for Hannah and the Slayers to hit over the head, kidnap, drench and hit over the head again. So thanks, amaya!
And 15 chapters, 17794 words and 205 reviews later, the rest is history.
Woah...long creation story.
I've got one thing left to say on this topic.
MODERATE, people, MODERATE!!
TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!
Everyone is welcome to be a Sue Slayer. Just add a line to your profile that says, 'A member of the Sue Slayers,' and you're in.
A fabulous piece of fanart by amaya-black-wings, Your Gun? My Gun.
Oh, and this is required watching for anyone who hates Mary Sues, I didn't make it, but it's actually a good song!
The Life of A Mary Sue
And a few litmus tests:
The Original Mary Sue Test
An Easier One
Artemis Sue Litmus Test (Warning, extremely long!!)
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A Harry Potter Mary Sue comic, hilarious, darlinks.
Sparklypoo
A Mary Sue Slash story generator, it's great for a laugh
Mary Sue Story Generator
The Ultimate HP Mary Sue fic
The Ultimate HP Sue!
PRAYER
My first Maximum Ride fic was a rush to write. I was rereading the Angel Experiment when I thought, during the church scene, I thought to myself, O Ace One, 'What is Fang praying for? We all know about Max's hopes and dreams (for crying out loud, she never shuts up!) but what about Fang?
I'd like to point out I hadn't read MR3 at this point.
So I wrote it. Originally it was just a big block of text, like Dear God, blah blah blah-dee-da for a whole page, but then I broke it up so it was more like Dear God, blah, Dear God, yadda yadda...
And I had to put Faxness in...
Yeah.
So I started scrawling, until Mum yelled at me to put the light out. I continued the next day, completely ignoring the delicious brownies in the oven, and posted it.
And that's the creation story of Prayer.
RIGHT, SUE SLAYER FANS!! THIS IS IMPORTANT!!
That got your attention, didn't it?
Now, as we all know, The Sue Slayers: A New Fangirologist is ending. And as much as it pains me to say, YENOYANM!
Basically, Yes! No! Yay! Damn!
You see, as fun as it was to write, and as much as I want to do a sequel, I am soooo sick of writing from Hannahs POV.
She's fun to write about, and it's great kicking Fangirl butt, I know, but seriously. It's called The Sue Slayers, and I'm writing about Fangirls.
So. We turn to the next problem: the sequel.
I want to do one.
Seriously. It's up there with visiting Tokyo and meeting Edward Cullen, write a Sue Slayers sequel.
I know what it's going to be about, Mary Sues.
But I can't have a Fangirologist tackling Mary Sues can I??
No I can't.
And I will eventually get the point, don't worry.
So, I need a Slayer instead of a Fangirologist. And I've got one. You all met her briefly in Artemis Fowls kitchen. Her name is Clare Martin, she's Hannah's best friend and she is, obviously, a Slayer. She's a bit like Hannah, in the way she has an obsession with lamingtons and despises Sues.
Are you guys OK with a sequel with Clare instead of Hannah? Hannah will be heavily featured, but Clare will be the main character.
So you can either PM me or vote on my poll (in fact, do both) and tell me what you think!!
Uh, thanks!
Ships:
Artemis Fowl:
Artemis and a brickwall (because, really, who could measure up to him?)
Artemis and an OC (not a genii, obviously.)
Artemis and Minerva (if I'm in a really good mood.)
Artemis and Holly (though I wrote a whole rant on the bad points of this, I still read it and have written a songfic. It wouldn't happen in canon, would it?)
Holly and Trouble (YAY!!)
Holly and Root (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! He's like, old enough to be her Grandfather. One more time, for good measure...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!)
Holly and Mulch (runs away crying)
Holly and Chix (falls on floor laughing)
Twilight:
Bella and Edward
Jasper and Alice
Esme and Carlisle
Emmett and Rosalie
Jacob and an OC
Mike and Jessica (just so Mike will leave Bella alone)
Bartimaeus:
Barty and Queezle
Nat and Kitty. Nuff said.
Vampirates:
Grace and Lorcan!!
Connor and Cheng Li ( I don't know why, just BECAUSE!)
Series of Unfortunate Events
Klaus and Isadora
Violet and Quigley
Duncan and Fiona (what, they both need a little lovin')
Sunny and a brickwall (she's, like two!!)
Actually...
Sunny and Claire from Twilight (what?)
Avatar:
Katara and Aang!! (SQUEE!!)
Zuko and Katara (still, forbidden love...SQUEE!)
Sokka and Toph (Might as well...)
Sokka and Suki (though they could be just friends...)
Maximum Ride
Max and Fang
Iggy and Nudge
Gazzy and some OC with no sense of smell
Angel and Opal Koboi (no, serious!)
Stats:
There have been 2536 hits to my profile page.
I have submitted 48,540 words.
I have submitted 1043 reviews.
I am on the favourites list of 36 people.
I'm on the author alerts list of 24 people.
My highest reviewed story is the Sue Slayers, with 299
The one with the most hits is also the Slayers...
And I really don't like tomatoes.
Quotes:
Homer Simpson: If you have to swallow a live frog, don't think about it and just do it.
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Zuko: You're just a child!
Aang: Well, you're just a teenager!
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Me: Save me, Patrick, God of Fallen Boys!
Emma: You really need a different God.
Me: Save me, Carlisle, God of Smexxi Vampires!-bus, on the way to school.
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Sally: Emmett!
Me: Jasper!
Sally: Emmett!
Me: Japser!
Tori: Edward!
Me: Carlisle!
Sally: Jacob
Tori and I: EWWWWW!!
Cathy: Emmett!
Sally: Yeah!
Tori: Yeah!
Me: Jasper
Cathy, Sally and Tori: Emmett!
Me: Edward!!
All: Yeah...
Sally: Emmett!
Tori: BILLY!
The rest of us: WHAT??-school assembly, an argument between us Twilighters.
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Tony Elliot, from Billy Elliot: FUCKIN' BALLET?
The entire population of Year 8: FUCKIN' BALLET!- film studies, school.
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Izzy: I think Billy Elliot is gay.
Me: I think he's straight!
Izzy: Gay.
Me: Uh, straight, he nearly makes out with the ballerina!
Izzy: But he kisses the guy!
Me: But he's HOT in Jumper!
Izzy: Good point. Still gay though. -film studies, school.
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Sea Shanty: I'll tell you a tale of Vampirates, a tale as old as true...
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Uglies: The afternoon sky was the colour of cat vomit-Tally Youngbloods thoughts, Uglies.
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Rachel: Nic, honestly, Paramore? You have no taste in music.
Me: You're right. (sarastically) Lets put on your Spice Girls and have no more talk.- the bus on the way to an excursion.
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Me: It's MANGA
Josh, over the phone: It's MAGNA!
Me: MANGA
Josh: MAGNA!
Me: MANGA!
Josh: MAGNA!
Me: MANGA!
Josh: MAGNA!
Me: MANGA!
Josh: MAGNA!
Me: MANGA!
Josh: MAGNA!
Me: MANGA!
Josh: MAGNA!
Me: MANGA!
Josh: MAGNA!
Me: MANGA!
Josh: MAGNA!
Me: MANGA!
Josh: MAGNA! I'm telling you, I'll look it up!
Me: Uh-huh...
Josh (typing noises and clicking): It's ...manga... Whatever.-an argument between my best bud and i about the pronunciation of manga.
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Patrick Stump, singing: The best part of believe is the lie-Sophomore Slump, Fall Out Boy
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Me, to Tori: I was writing this fic last night where this Sue like attacked all the Canons and I'm like, Oh my Carlisle but the Canons and Fangirls banded together and serumed the Sues and Stus and saved the fandom!
Tori: You were smoking what? -You don't realise FanFiction owns you until something like that happens. The library, school.
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Tori: Oh
Sally: My
Both: Carlisle!!
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Me: I never was a Christian...
Sally: I was borderline...
Tori: I believed in God...
Katy: But he is our God now...
All: WE LOVE YOU, CARLISLE!
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We are the music makers and we are the dreamers of dreams.
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I'm a guest on planet Earth
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Normal? Me? Weasel?-Me, in maths.
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"My favourite band is Fall Out Boy. I've loved their music since, like, EVER! What makes Fall Out Boy different is that their lead singer, Patrick, wears glasses. And he doesn't write the lyrics. The bassist, Pete Wentz does. Pete is hot.-From my public speaking draft, that I read in front of my class.
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The only thing I haven't done yet is die-Patrick Stump, Thriller.
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This is how I picture Trouble Kelp . He just looks like Orlando Bloom to me!!
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I REALLY REALLY REALLY HATE:
Homophobia. Dude, God made them love each other.
Racism. Dude, God made them.
Techno music. Not all of it, I like the Chemical Brothers and DJ Zannon, just not the stuff that is just blips and beeping. That is not music. It's probably morse code telling us to buy more useless junk.
eXtreme Shippers. You know, the ones who flame anything that goes against their ships.
Lablers. For some reason, just because I listen to MCR, FOB, Red Jumpsuit, P!ATD, Hawthorne Heights and stuff like that, people call me emo. I don't cut myself, I don't wear all black, all the time. I just like the music.
Mary Sues. I've written rants, I've written fics, I've written reviews. TAKE A LITMUS TEST, PEOPLE!
Drugs. I've seen too many people get sick and die, or go into debt, or rehab. I will never take drugs. They make me sick.
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Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up
You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor
It's a matter of life after death-now that he's dead, I have a life
My Old Friend
I once had a really great friend. We did everything together, played, ate, danced, laughed, cried. Then something terrible happened. She grew up and I didn't.
I was still playing with my toys, and she was shopping. She was listening to rap while I listened to my parents golden oldies. She knew why eyeliner was important. I believed in fairies, and she worshipped Britney and Paris.
So we broke friends, and I realised all the other girls in my class were growing up too. They were wearing foundation, mascara and lipgloss and straightening their hair. I couldn't put on mascara without sticking myself in the eye.
My old friends got boyfriends, and crushes on movie stars. To me, boys were like my brothers. Friends sometimes, but enemies mostly.
My old friends listened to hardcore techno, rap about drugs and rape, and hip hop about things kids our age shouldn't have to know about. I loved Crowded House and Elton John.
I had no friends to turn to, so I hid in books and they became my friends. I was a Fangirl before I even knew what a Fangirl was. My old friends became addicted to stupid soapies, stuff like the OC and the Hills.
We were ten years old.
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•.¸ (•.¸ ¸.•´)¸.•´.¸.• (¸.•´ •.¸)•.
. + MY+ .. +CHEMICAL+ROMANCE+ . + ., RULES. + PUT+. IT + . ON. .
+ . YOUR. + . + .+ ..PROFILE.. + . «´¨•°•´¨»
.¸.• (¸.•´ •.¸)•.
One of my best friends died recently; I'm really upset. He was such a great guy and I miss him. Maybe you knew of him. Most people did. I hope it wasn't you who contributed to his death, otherwise I shall dispatch a vicious band of lions to disembowel you. Okay, I don't have a troupe of lions at my disposal, but I can find one, trust me. My friend was a paragon of amazing. His name was Common Sense. I am sorry to inform you of his demise. Mourn with me.
Dearly beloved…we gather here to say our goodbyes. Here he lies…
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.
Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate and teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student; but, could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm A Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone.
Rest In Peace, my old friend.
If you believe every child deserves a chance to grow up and go to school, copy and paste this into your profile
If you want world peace, a brighter future, and more chocolate, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want the planet to become more sustainable, copy and paste this into your profile, then go recycle something.
If you want to see Maximum Ride (the movie) on the first day it comes out, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile.
If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If you ever HAVE slapped someone, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want the actors and celebrities of Hollywood to be smarter and better role models, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want the drought to end, take shorter showers and then copy and paste this into your profile.
8 SIMPLE RULES FOR WRITING FANFICTION:
1. Everyone says you need a plot before you write. I find it hard to stick to a plot, so what I do is draw out the vague beginning, the muddly middle and the opaque ending. Like, you know the ending has to be with these characters, at a certain location. That's all you need. And then you can work backwards. How did they get to said location? Because the mutant flying children chased them there in the middle. And why were there mutant flying children? Because a certain boy genius created them in the beginning!
2. KNOW YOUR CANONS!
Even if you're a girl pretending to be freakin' EMMETT CULLEN, the manliest man of the Cullens (lol) try and get into their head. Like, why does Emmett make fun of Bella, why does he stay with Rose, how does he like to kill his grizzly...
Act out some scenes by yourself, or pretend to interview them, or be them and be interviewed. You will look like an idiot, but it's worth it.
3. KNOW YOUR OC's!
OCs are easier and harder, because you create them, and know them from the start, but of course, they can turn into Mary Sues or Gary Stus or one dimensional bits of cornflake. So make a MySpace page for them. That way you know heaps about them from their fave song to their heroes.
4. This one is for beginners mostly. Get. A. Beta. PLEASE! Some people (me included) don't have betas, but I've been writing since I was four. Doesn't mean I'm good at actually writing, butt mi spellun und grammir ROX!!
5. Rewrite. If you're not happy with a scene, rewrite it. If something seems off about a chapter, look at it and rewrite it. There's no point in posting something you aren't 95 percent happy with.
6. Smut, lemons and limes. If you're writing a romance fic, you do not need a lemon or smut scene. If you put one in in the original draft, fine, but if it lasts more than half a chapter cut it down. Or out. Or if you put one in just to bring in reviews, don't. Reviews should be because people want the story, not lots of creepy HollyArty action.
7. Summaries. I don't care if you 'suck at summarys.' No one cares. Don't put the disclaimer in the summary, don't use text speak or w/ for with. FanFic authors found their way around writing the ships out the long way, we come up with nicknames and shortened names, you know, Fax, HollyArty, ExB, EmxR, Kataang, Zutara, Brangelina. If you can't summarise your story in a few sentences, put in a line of text from your story as a teaser, e.g. 'I don't want to be like this anymore. I just...I can't take it!' she screamed, and pitched herself off the cliff.
8. We've all done it. You know. 'I need five reviews before the next chapter,' 'more reviews or no more fic!' stuff like that. Set yourself a private limit, like two good reviews, or post on a certain day. No, 'It's on hiatus because I only get 2 reviews a chapter!'
Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular and fitting in, the other five percent are liars. Asking me to define this statement, I answered: NO one is NOT concerned about fitting in. Everyone, in the back of their minds, needs companionship, and would like as much as possible. Even emos and goths are like that because they didn't get enough attention in the first place, so they decided to withdraw themselves from average society. Everyone wants to fit in, so give your best friend a hug today, give a stranger a pat on the back, and tell your parents you appreciate them. Everyone deserves to be loved, so give a little bit. Believe me, you'll get a lot in return. Copy and paste this if you believe this.
.•´¸•´¨) ¸.•¨)¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´~
pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer.
If you have ever tripped when there was a "watch your step" sign copy and paste this into your profile.
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, which I am, but I'm also random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
The World We Live In...
The World We Live In is a pretty amazing place...
It's where a man can't walk down the street holding his boyfriends hand without being called names...
It's a place where women are highly valued objects...
It's where people of different colours are treated like different species...
It's a place where we start wars over something we didn't need in the first place...
It's where homeless people sleep in the streets, while rich people step over them...
It's truly amazing the way we are heating up with our little conveniences, TVs, Cars, computers, just because people are too lazy to get solar panels...
It's a place where our role models are only famous because of the people they slept with...
It's where old men rule the old women, the young men, the young women, and the children and don't let any new ideas in...
It's a special place where it's normal to be overweight...
A truly wonderful world where three billion women feel inadequate because the models they look up to have just lost forty kilos thanks to a computer...
It truly is a wonderful, wonderful world.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile
If you or your best friend is insane copy and paste this onto your profile
92 percent of American teens would die if Abecrombie or Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this into your bio if you would be in the 8 percent laughing at them.
If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer
98 of teenagers do drugs, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.
If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!
If you have ever been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing maniacally, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever laughed so hard tears streamed down your face, you banged your repeatedly on a table, and received weird looks from everyone in the immediate vicinity, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile. (all the time)
If you ran up a "Down" escalator, copy this into your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile. If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
15.Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!!"
If you have ever referred to yourself as either Dairy Queen Cucumber, Ruler of the Ice Cream, or Mononoke-Hime, copy and paste this into your profile. (me? All three.)
If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
If you could read that put it in your profile!
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying 'Damn! That was fun!'
For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself. So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.
A true friend is someone who will try to answer the "eraser bits" question and have a long conversation about it. A friend is someone who won't say anything when you cry for no reason, but will start sobbing to, just help you cry. If you have a true friend, copy and paste this in your profile.
REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?
when )m 0 m( was your hero
and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings
and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this into your profile
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile. (it was actually fun, sadly enough.)
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.
You know you're obsessed with Twilight if...
You start going up to random people to tell them you want an Edward!
You think your next door neighbor looks like a vampire, or he really is a vampire.
You try to control your thoughts because Edward might hear them.
You've read Twilight and New Moon at least 5 times each!
You check on this site 5 times (or more) a day to see if there's any new Twilight news.
You think your best friend's crazy for not reading/liking/becoming obsessed Twilight or New Moon.
You give your teachers Twilight and/or New Moon for Christmas.
When you see a box labeled "Forks", you think there's something imported from Forks, Washington in there.
Twilight has ruined any and all future reading for you.
You use Twilight for every single school project that pops up.
You break up with your boyfriend because he doesn't glitter in the sun like Edward.
You have nothing to do, so you go to www.stepheniemeyer.com and count along with the Breaking Dawn countdown.
If you recycled something this week, buy yourself something and copy and paste this into your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile
98 percent of the teenage population has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the two percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile.
Ninety-Five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list, Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmuisc, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minamoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy the Mary-Sue Slayer, Harry's Girl 01031992, WanderingTeen, Erik's Muse, comix-freak, the epitome of randomness
If you dance in the shower, copy this into your profile.
If you are a chocoholic copy this into your profile
If you solemly swear you are up to no good copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile
My best friend is insane! If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, then copy this to your profile.
If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.
If you're stalking a fictional character copy this to your profile. (Artemis Fowl. Readers: No, really?)
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up.
He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had.
I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me. I
am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me
. I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.
Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it
If someone you thought was your best friend betrayed you, stabed you in the back, embarrassed you, made you cry on purpose, or told bunch's of people your secrets post this on your profile.
If your unpopular and had a a friend who's popular and you aren't friends anymore post this on your profile
Child Abuse:
My name is Sarah, I am but three,
My eyes are swollen I cannot see,
I must be stupid, I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mummy
Would still want to hug me
I can't speak at all I can't do a thing wrong
Or else I'm locked up all the day long
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home
When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just-
Don't make a sound! I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar I hear him curse
My name he calls I press myself
Against the wall I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid I'm starting to cry
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more, I finally get free
And I run for the door
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me against the hard wall I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken, and my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken "I'm sorry!", I scream
But its was much too late
His face has been twisted into unimaginable hate
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor
My name is Sarah and I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
Murdered me.
Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!
Please, be aware that child abuse happens everyday, and it's not just physical, it's emotional too, and sometimes that hurts more than a beating from your parents. Physical abuse scars you on the outside and that pain will go away, but emotional abuse scars you on the inside and the pain of being called worthless never goes away. So please, help stop the abuse.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc, and the people who kill the animals don't use the meat, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you becasue of the effects, copy and paste this into your profile.
My name is Nicola and I am a FanFiction Addict. If you're a FanFiction Addict, copy and paste this onto your profile.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm WICCA so I MUST be an evil, soulless witch.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MUM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big DICK.
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.
I have BOOBS, so I MUST be a ho.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so i must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I listen to HEAVY METAL so I MUST be a drugged up skinhead.
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7.
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be fucked up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect.
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I Love SHOPPING so I must be rich.
I'm an OG so I must be Mexican.
I go to PUBLIC SCHOOL so I MUST be a Bogan.
I love READING so I MUST be a geek.
If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...(taken from Sir Spamalots profile)
You talk to yourself a lot. (e.g. Hmm, what would happen if it was sunny the day Bella got hit by the van? Oh, story idea!! Must get computer!)
You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')
When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')
After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'
You live off of sugar and caffine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)
You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then dissappear off the face of the earth.
You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.
You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.
No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.
The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.
Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.
People think you have A.D.D.
You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.
You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.
You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason
Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.
And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.
(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)
You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volterra" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile.
If you kinda think mosquitoes are a little bit cooler now because they suck blood (which makes them kinda like a vampire) copy this into your profile.
if you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile.
If you refer to yourself in the third person, copy and paste this into your profile.
When primitive humans first came along, they did not engage in business
as we now think of it. They engaged in squatting around in caves naked.
This went on for, I would say, roughly two or three million years, when all
of a sudden a primitive person, named Oog, came up with an idea. "Why not,"
he said, "pile thousands of humongous stones on top of each other in the
desert to form great big geometric shapes?" Well, everybody thought this
was an absolutely terrific idea. It wasn't until several thousand years
later that they realized they had been suckered into a classic "pyramid"
scheme, and of course, by that time, Oog was in the Bahamas.
lol.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject
Child Abuse
Her dad was a drunk
Her mum was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic
Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair
She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound
Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure
A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?
But she grabs her bear
And softly cries
She loves her parents
But they want her to die
She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"Please God, why is
My life always sinking? "
Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did
Then one night
Her mom came home high
And the poor child was beaten
As hours went by
Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made
She thrust the blade
Right in her chest,
"You deserve to die
You worthless pest!"
The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dieing
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying
Police showed up
At the small little house
Then quickly barged in
Everything quiet as a mouse
One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the little girl
Lying on the floor
It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms
if there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile
if you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile
If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.
•.¸ (•.¸ ¸.•´)¸.•´.¸.• (¸.•´ •.¸)•.
. + FALL+ .. +OUT+..+ BOY + ., RULES. + PUT+. IT + . ON. .
+ . YOUR. + . + .+ ..PROFILE.. + . PAGE«´¨•°•´¨»
.¸.• (¸.•´ •.¸)•.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've reread TWILIGHT over four times...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
You Know You’re Addicted To Twilight When…
You have seriously considered cliff diving.
At the zoo, you give the wolves a wide berth.
Whenever someone asks how your food is, you say, ‘Well, it’s no irritable grizzly…’
Any time you hear the name Edward, you spin around going ‘WHERE?’
Anyone with pale skin and strange eyes is subject to strange looks from YOU
It’s perfectly acceptable to camp outside the bookstore for Breaking Dawn.
Harry Potter is old news.
You've added 'Volturi,' 'Volterra,' and 'Quileute' to your computer dictionary.
You jump at the chance to move to small, rainy towns.
People with extremely good looks and nice clothes are subject to RVT (Random Vampirism Tests)
It's normal to hold 'Bella MUST BE CHANGED' protests in the middle of large cities.
You create Random Vampirism Tests, which usually involve you, a knife and an artery.
Hot doctors are subject to RVTs. No exceptions.
Anyone who listens to Debussy/Muse/Claire DeLune is subject to glaring.
You aren’t scared of thunderstorms, you just wonder where they’re playing baseball this time.
It’s perfectly acceptable to edit your thoughts.
It’s perfectly acceptable to carry around a vial of animal blood, JUST IN CASE you get changed.
If you're planning to form a mob to attack Stephenie's publisher because you want Breaking Dawn before August 10th, 2008, copy this into your profile. (I'll personally supply the pitchforks.)
If you get pissed and throw a fit until all the people in the room run away whenever someone says that the characters of Twilight aren't real, copy this into your profile.
If you want Bella to turn into a vampire, copy this into your profile. (This one better spread like wildfire.)
If you could own a library with every book you have ever wanted to read and or liked/loved copy and past this on to your profile and add yourname to the list Italiangurlinmessedupworld the epitome of randomness
if you think twilight is the best book in the world and most of the people who haven't read it are morons and losers copy and paste this on your profile and add your name Italiangurlinamessedupworld the epitome of randomness
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.
If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!
If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile
If you are convinced you really do have wings and Itex( aka Walmart or Microsoft or something) has put a chip in you to make the wings invisible and has erased all of your memories of being a bird kid, copy and paste this into your profile.
My friends are the type of people who would try to drown a fish, but I love them anyway
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."
If every time someone asked you about what Maximum Ride was about you got a crazy look from them saying am-I-really-hanging-out-with-you type of look and you don’t care copy and paste this in your profile
If you'll take first watch copy and paste this is you profile.
Give a person a fish, you feed them for a day; Teach a person to use the Internet, they won't bother you for weeks.
Some people are like a slinky..not really good for anything, but you can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
If you think the writers of movie scripts that were once books or who ever forces them to run away with the real plot and hacks it up with an ax deserves to go to a mental institution put this on your profile
If you are proven to be a "mythical" creature copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have broke out in tears for no reason, and then laughed while still crying copy and paste this onto your profile!
If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile!
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDGE!! ... copy and paste this into your profile
If you love the whole blind, pyro, mutant, baker thing that is Iggy, post this in your profile.
If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.
If you relate everything to Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you still laugh rereading Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you are crazy and/or insane and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile
(o.o) Help pokmeon rule the world!! Copy this on your profile!!
If you have ever been in a website that is rated T when your only ten copy and paste this to your profile.
If you know someone who is four and watches movies rated PG-13 (Australians, that's M 15+) copy and paste this to your profile.
åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ765Just random84548µ¡™£¢∞§§¶•ªºº–≠.†¥¨ˆøπ““‘«
The Review Revolution...
Even if the fic has 10002464 reviews already...
Even if the fic is older than time itself...
Even if it was abandoned a loooooooooooooooooooooong time ago...
Even if the author turned out to be a total psychopath...
Even if the OC is a Sue and the spelling would make a dictionary cry...
I will review every fic I read. What goes around comes around, and more people will review my own fics. I have joined (another) Review Revolution.
åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ765Just random84548µ¡™£¢∞§§¶•ªºº–≠.†¥¨ˆøπ““‘«
MY FICS!!
MESSAGES AND ROMANCE
Much shorter. In science one day, my friend was emailing me as I tried to work. She sounded so much like a bimbo...like Lilli Frond. That night, after I'd put off doing my homework (procrastination is an art, so do it...later.) I sat down and started chatspeaking. I lost my first ever (and later abandoned) plot sheet, wrote the last chapter about eight times, but...
My longest, un-rant, un-OC filled story, was COMPLETE!
Yayness.
MY RANDOM RANT ON MARY SUES
Basically, I was like Hughsey. I lost it. (Aussie in joke) So many bloody Sues clogging up the Fandoms, drowning poor (as I understood it) Edward, Nathaniel and Artemis (Harry was with Draco at the time) So, as this was my pre-Twilight days, I threw Artemis a shining lifeline of raven tresses. And italiangurlinamessedupworld wrote an Edward Sue piece for me, so...Thanks! You is ROCKING!!
And a bunch of chapters (some short, most adequate-ish length) and reviews later, I created the Slayers.
THE SUE SLAYERS
So I'm going to write about the creation of the Sue Slayers. My favourite ever bit of paradology-a study of sueism with a few Fangirls thrown in. And also the most popular thing I've written. EVER!
So basically, I'd been trying to do something about Mary Sues. This was pre-My Random Rant on Mary Sues and everything. So I thought to myself, Nicola the wonderful, I thought, what if there were people who fought Mary Sues? And they used music (this is sounding familiar) what if the leader had been a rescued Sue? (record scratch noise). You see, the leader was named Christy, and lived in a sort of Utopian and Dystopia.
Her world was like a Utopia for Suethors, and it was where Mary Sues were created, in sort of a boarding school.
But then I thought, as I wrote about Christy and her friends, Paige and Matt, that it was a dumbass idea. I had Christy fainting or having to block her ears whenever pop music could be heard, lest she relapse, from an OC to a Sue again. And she did, but Artemis saved her-well, her mind, so she was a super hot Sue Slayer. Like, she had the body of a Sue and the mind of Christy. Yeah. Bad idea, I tells ya. Artemis was bought into their world and I realised I was getting into a pattern with my fics: Artemis is either sucked into a world, or bought someone out of theirs. And I was going in circles.
So I ripped those up. Huzzah!
Then, a few months later I wrote My Random Rant.
And of course, I mention the Slayers in it. Originally, Hannah was yet to be classed (you know, Canonist, Fangirologist, Slayer) and was wondering what to do, when Artemis was kidnapped by Fangirls. Hannah ended up hooking up with the English Matthew Carney, who was much hotter and nicer back then. Still hot, still nice now but not as much.
And it showed Minerva in a bad light, and as a tentative MINAS supporter, not good.
So I abandoned it.
Then Elliot was already shot and they needed a replacement, so in came Hannah.
And then that was abandoned.
Then, as some of you may recall, there was a one chapter thing I published with Hannah in a tree, watching Artemis. It was so long ago, but I'm fairly sure she was a Canonist then...
But of course, I put out the call for ideas, and made some of you guys Slayers...then I asked amaya-black-wings very nicely, and she lent me Ame Shiku, her OC, for Hannah and the Slayers to hit over the head, kidnap, drench and hit over the head again. So thanks, amaya!
And 20 or so chapters, 30 000 words and over 300 reviews later, the rest is history.
Woah...long creation story.
TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!
Everyone is welcome to be a Sue Slayer. Just add a line to your profile that says, 'A member of the Sue Slayers,' and you're in.
A fabulous piece of fanart by amaya-black-wings, Your Gun? My Gun.
Oh, and this is required watching for anyone who hates Mary Sues, I didn't make it, but it's actually a good song!
The Life of A Mary Sue
And a few litmus tests:
The Original Mary Sue Test
An Easier One
Artemis Sue Litmus Test (Warning, extremely long!!)
TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!TRA LA LAAA PAGE BREAK!!
A Harry Potter Mary Sue comic, hilarious, darlinks.
Sparklypoo
A Mary Sue Slash story generator, it's great for a laugh
Mary Sue Story Generator
The Ultimate HP Mary Sue fic
The Ultimate HP Sue!
PRAYER
My first Maximum Ride fic was a rush to write. I was rereading the Angel Experiment when I thought, during the church scene, I thought to myself, O Ace One, 'What is Fang praying for? We all know about Max's hopes and dreams (for crying out loud, she never shuts up!) but what about Fang?
I'd like to point out I hadn't read MR3 at this point.
So I wrote it. Originally it was just a big block of text, like Dear God, blah blah blah-dee-da for a whole page, but then I broke it up so it was more like Dear God, blah, Dear God, yadda yadda...
And I had to put Faxness in...
Yeah.
So I started scrawling, until Mum yelled at me to put the light out. I continued the next day, completely ignoring the delicious brownies in the oven, and posted it.
And that's the creation story of Prayer.
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Yeah.
Random.
And just remember:
LIVE LIFE-OR DIE TRYING!!
If your profile is long, copy and paste this onto it to make it even longer.
Lotsa Luv,
Nicola!
FanFiction.Net - unleash your imagination
Poll: The Sue Slayers sequel-are you ok with the new character.... Vote Now!
