I'm Archontic. I'm a full-time musician, and occasionally I feel like writing a one-shot. Mostly for personal closure, like resolving how fucking miserable the end of the Berserk! anime made me feel. Don't expect much from my writing. It's cheesy and unrefined. I put little to no real effort into it; then again, less than a handful of people on this website are willing to put forth any effort.

Best tips I can offer?

Research. If you're unsure of something, don't write about it without looking into it. It's annoying to read about someone getting drunk or having sex when the writing makes it painfully obvious that the author has little to no experience with it. Get your fucking facts straight or get the fuck out. Always research your shit to get your facts straight. Writing should be a learning experience.

And use spellcheck for fuck's sake. There's no excuse when that shit is automatic in most word processors and Firefox itself. Not one fucking excuse.

Indent your fucking paragraphs. I can't read three pages of text without a single fucking indentation. Format is important. Write the best story in the world, but it won't be shit if I can't even read the fucking thing.

Use variety. Don't reuse the same verb for every action. If you can't think of another word, go to thesaursus(.)com. Trust me when I say that you won't pull a muscle.

Don't use internet acronyms (I.E. omg, lol, etc;). It pisses me off. I hope it pisses other people off too. While your at it, don't use one letter in lieu of an actual word (I.E. u for you) or butcher words to make them shorter (I.E. wat or wut for what). I don't care what the fuck you do on AIM or on your blog, but when you're writing a story, essay, report, or anything related, DON'T FUCKING DO IT. That shit is a fucking cancer.

It's right fucking obvious that questions end with question marks (Is it that difficult.) you FUCKING IDIOT.

@ Americunts: Don't fuck with this free education shit you assholes are getting. Pay attention in English class if you want to be a writer. Stop being douchebags.

98 percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you are a part of that 98 percent and had a damn good time doing it, put this in your profile.