Hello to the people who take the time to read profiles! As per instructions to not give away any personal information, I will not tell you anything about me! They're very touchy about that.

I will probably read end up reading more than I write, as inspiration comes at the most random times.

If I do write, they will mostly be one-shots and have as little dialogue as possible. I'm trying to do longer, chapter stories, but have discovered that keeping in touch with the character of the characters (or lack thereof) in the stories is very hard. So for those who have accomplished it, if I wore a hat, I would take mine off to you. I also found out that writing good comedy is hard. So if you are reading "Mister Potter Meets The Doctor," then please bear with me.

Anyway, the only things that I will tell whoever is reading this is that I love black olives, the SciFi Channel, Discovery Network, utterly despise the whole concept of the SATs, ACTs, and SAT IIs (damn the people who come up with those!).

I have a philosophy about people that may seem unorthodox, but here it is anyway, and please take no offence:

You can insult a person's home, ethnicity, race, background, choice of political standing, their current government, their mothers, and pretty much anything else there is that I'm leaving out, but insult someone's religion and then you're screwed.

Do YOU remember the Nineties??

Just because you were born in '97 doesn't mean you're a 90's kid. It's not like you could remember the original Simpsons. I am sorry, but three conscious years of the 90's just wont cut it. You're a 90's kid if... you remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!, Rocko's Modern Life, Animaniacs, Gargoyles. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!" You just can't resist finishing this... "in west Philadelphia born and raised..." You remember Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, Boy Meets World. You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons. You remember reading Goosebumps. You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence... not. When everything was settled by rock-paper-scissors or "bubble gum, bubble gum in a dish" or Ms. Mary Mack. When kick ball was a daily activity. When we used to obey our parents. You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time on a tape. You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genesis became popular. You remember the ORIGINAL Game Boy. You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos... but never taped anything funny. You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, Reading Rainbow, andGhostwriter on PBS. You remember when Yo-Yos were cool. You remember those Where's Waldo? books. You remember eating Warheads and Splashers Gum. You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Ghostbusters. You remember Ring Pops. If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!" You remember boom boxes vs. CD players. Making those little paper fortune cootie catcher things, and then predicting your life with them. You played and/or collected "Pogs." You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere. One word... Trolls. Windows 95 was the best. You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Wild Thornberrys, Power Rangers, Rocket Power. All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand. You collected those Beanie Babies. You remember Carebears. Lambchop's song never ended. Silver dollars, which were cool to have. Everyone watched the WB. If you even know what an original Walkman is. You know the Macarena by heart. "Talk to the hand" ...enough said. You went to McDonald's to play in the Playplace. You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground. Before the MySpace frenzy . . . Before the Internet & text messaging ... Before Sidekicks & iPods ... Before PlayStation3 or X-BOX 360 ... Before Spongebob ... Before Tupac was shot. When light-up sneakers were cool. When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs. When gas was 95 cents a gallon. When we recorded stuff on VCRs. You had slap bracelets! You actually played outside until it was dark! Way back. Before we realized all this would eventually disappear. Post this in your bulletin if you remember these days...

ON A VERY IMPORTANT NOTE!!

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.
Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it

GAY MARRIAGE:
1) Being gay is not natural. People always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.
2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Briteny Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.