"Look Floyd, just face the facts. To be interested in you,
she'd have to have been born with a spanner in her paws."

"You don't know what she's-"

"Look, you're a machine. A souless robot. He has a heart,
you have a circuit board. You don't have a personality,
you just mimic one. If I was a girl, I'd pick flesh and blood
over a hunk of hardware. What exactly can you offer her
that he can't?"

"Understanding. Compassion. Every whim she would have
me do."

Alvin gave the droid a look usually reserved for when
someone picks their nose and shows you it.

"Jeez, your operating system must be ancient. Nothing uses
the code of chivalry nowadays."

"Shut up."

Now and Forever - Preview

Recent News Other Information My OCs / Story Data

Media Animation Data I Hate Rayquaza Quotes

Shipping By Numbers Shipping By Numbers 2

Story Progress:
Last Updated: 16/10/09, 23:09 GMT.

Now and Forever - Chapter 1: (1,092 words) Struggling to make it work.

TAOS - Chapter 5 - (381 words)

IDMC - Chapter 2 - (1,360 words)

Flagship-E

Great Spirits Above - Chapter 1 - (1,144 words)

Revamps:
Last Updated: 11/10/09, 14:11 GMT.

The Guardian Father - Chapter 12 Revamp: (486 words)

Strangers In The Night - 9 of 9 chapters repaired.

Recent News:

116/10/09:
Ha ha! A new story at last!

11/10/09:
I've finally got around to repairing all of SitN, so I'm not dead yet. I'm still suffering from Coherancy Writers Block (Aka, I can make the scenes but I can't link them up), but at least I should be getting back into writing at least slightly more frequently. When I get Chapter 10 of SitN finished, I also have its new name ready

08/09/09:
Erm... I am definately overdue for an update or... a thousand...

06/08/09:
Now I seriously am trying to get some work done on these, I keep getting distracted with trivialities. I've still got 3 chapters of SitN to make coherant yet, as well as work on on with GSA, TAoS, and TGF. Definately must be over a year since I last put anything on here.

25/05/09:
Yes, I know I keep saying I'm going to get something done... and I will eventually get around to it. (Sweatdrops) I owe a lot of work for this site now... I'm what? 5 months or so behind? That was enough for most of The Guardian Father... Better get a move on with Great Spirits Above then...

29/04/09:
(Cue the noise of something heavy, and metal, falling over onto something equally heavy and glass) Spare time? What's spare time? Can't remember what it is.

... It's what?

Dammit I'm jealous now. (Goes off to hunt down some spare time)

12/03/09:
I've just come up with another wonderfully depressing Lati based story Great Spirits Above, which I've just started drafting up. Animation and story repairs are off until I've got something ready to be uploaded.

02/03/09:
Warning: Clumsy Author just woke up, and may bump into/break things.
I'm back to writing... Well... almost... I'm more intending to animate for a while before getting back into penning out a new chapter. But I will be back soon! And I will repair SitN and TGF! Especially since I should point out that TGF isn't actually finished yet. Anyway, I am alive.

Aww dangit I missed SU's Legendary x Regular challenge -.-" How depressing is that? Stuff it, I'll finish it anyway.

08/01/09:
About time I returned to this. Whilst university work hasn't really dropped in intensity, I am returning to writing stories using my free time above other things. As you'll see from the replacement of the Narcen Blade introduction I used to use, theres life in the old dog yet. Of course, none of it will make much sense yet, not until I update SitN a few times.

2/12/08:
University work really began to pick up in the last month, pressing my fiction works waaaaaaay back. I don't know when I'll be able to get back into writing properly, but I do intend on making an effort for SU's Legendary x Regular Challege. After all, the PMD2 based fic is using that.

19/07/08:
Woohoo! SilverLightshipping became the official name for the LugiaxLatios pair!
Search for SilverLight here.

Other Information About Lateral Ganon.

# # # Access Pokedex # # #

# # # Search Complete - 1 result found # # #

Species: Latios. Gender: Male.

Location: England. All times/dates used by me in my notices and Author Notes are GMT and dd/mm/yy.

Hobbies: Biology, Cooking, Animating, Metallurgy, and 'Inventing'. And writing fics of course.

Relevant Friend codes:
Pokemon Diamond - 2449 2671 8218
Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Exlorers of Time - 0688 8107 9886

# # # End of Results # # #

Current Pokemon Team (Diamond):
Name: Ganon. FC: 2449 2671 8218

Time for a change. It can be any six of the following, all at level 100. Readers of my work will recognise the first two, and having been on the recieving end of Melissa's ice, they hurt. Moxis has recently been put to the test, and he successfully took down a 5 members of a team of ubers single-handedly.

Glaceon, Lucario, Salamence, Starmie, Skarmory,
Togekiss, Houndoom, Medicham, Smeargle,
Gengar, Blissey, Final Enigma.

Other Wifi Games I have:

Mario Kart. (I never lose on Rainbow Road. If you meet a Ganon with a Latias icon on mixed blue backing, it's me you're about to lose to.)
Animal Crossing. (By now over-run with weeds)
Diddy Kong Racing. (Must be an acquired taste, since no-one plays on Wi-Fi)
Metroid Prime Hunters. (Not so good at this one)
Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Exlorers of Time (Fear Team Obsidian! Team number on Wi-Fi connection is 0000-0009-8920 if you want to try and beat them.)
Bomberman 2

If anyone wants my friend codes for any of these wifi games, PM me.

My Original Characters (based on their first appearance)
Total Count: 32

The Guardian Father: Ganon, Ganon-X (Darikos form), Laura the Latias, Moxis the Lucario, Sarah the Blaziken. Einar the Green Latios, Lombard The Latios, Benevuto the Red Latios.

Strangers in the Night: Martin the Mudkip/Marshtomp, Lomar and Mildred the Swellows, Eddie the human and his daughter Clair (half OC), General Kenai the Alakazam, Geraint, Melissa the Glaceon, Colonel Lazlo (Picture), Larkspur the Latias, Argent, Kotor the Gallade, Carol the Chansey, and Wolfram.

The Appliance of Science: Kelvin the Sneasel. Personality Robot.

A Kiss Of Fire: Sophie the Cyndaquil, Benjamin and Kelly Pepper, Major Cobalt.

Now and Forever: Floyd, Gemma the Quilava, and Peter Swanson the human.

If Dragons May Care: 'Snow Wolf' actually a friend on Runescape, but borrowed the name and some traits of her character, although aged slightly to fit the story. Certainly she and Harsune form the basis for the group she's working with (Laughs just thinking about it. Thank you Harsune for that one word that gave me the idea).

Rocking the Boat: Lime the Treecko, Crunch the Totodile. Layna

OCs not in count: SitN:Meditite Techies. Assorted Dittos. Assorted Brelooms. A Machamp. A Loudred. The Ribs. Carosso.
TGF: Gracilia the Gardevoir. More Meditie Techies. Narunia the Sneasel. Alicia the Marill.
AKoF:The Pepper's Nanny. Andrew and a Machoke.
TYLAM: Beryl Swanson. Arnold and Erkle.
IDMC: About ten fan-girls.

Story Data:

Writing Style: If I can make it awkward for a character(s), I probably will. I always find the scenic route more rewarding than the simple straight line path, and I like metaphors, obviously. I make really stupid typos occasionally, and some words in my stories may have words swapped around randomly.

I generally work with a minimum of 2k words per chapter, except in my flagship stories (TGF and SitN) which have a 5k minimum generally. The only exception is Contact, which I messed up anyway, even if my reviewers think otherwise.

Apparantly, every time you put real physics into an anime or fiction, God kills a catgirl. I deliberately put a lot of real physics in because of that, particularly in SitN.

Pending/ Ideas:

Great Spirits Above - Romance/Spiritual - The history of Kraith is saturated with myths, stories even from ages before human civilisation. A time of tribal communities, hunting and foraging for their existence. In an age unfettered by the chains of science, magic and spirits are very real things, to be revered and respected.

Gemstone - Adventure/Romance - Avoiding your ex is easy. Avoiding a hell-bent lizard and his cronies hell-bent on stealing your current girlfriend... quite a bit harder.

Snakes and Stones - Romance/Adventure - Generations back, legends told of how the Bane of the Eons had been sealed away in the Temple of Wind, never to be released, and to crumble to dust as the earth aged. However, a fanatical group of humans, calling themselves Team Ozone, have rediscovered the lost temple, and seek to liberate their captured idol from the prison binding it there.

Now And Forever -Sci-Fi - Something I came up with whilst taking a shower. It's amazing how many ideas emerge from the pursuit of cleanliness. Like A Kiss of Fire, it's set outside of my Ganon x Laura standard pairing, but still set in Kraith.

Tremors - General - This fic would explain exactly why Dowsing can't take place in the normal timeline, although there are three issues with it. A) It needs a lot more of SitN done before enough is known about it to make sense. B) It needs TAoS to be completely finished so No. 7 is started. C) It would probably turn up in No. 7 anyway about 8 chapters in

Opalescence - Response to SU's EspeonxUmbreon Challenge ages ago. Virtually guaranteed to be multi-chapter, and again set in a part of Kraith.

Of The Origin of Species - General - The MewxShaymin fic I'll make if the poll result is good. Mew and Shaymin stumble on a planet void of life (Earth in the distant past), and compete to decide the dominant organism: Plants or animals. Naturally, chaos ensues as the challenge gets dirty... quite literally when mud starts flying.

In Progress:

Rocking the BoatRomance/Adventure - I really need to work on a summary for this. All I can word so far is that it's a friendshipping thats not a friendshipping.

The Guardian Father - Action/Adventure/General - A rewrite I made of Pokemon Heroes. The first story I made on this site, and requires some repair.

Strangers In The Night - Romance/Adventure - A pet project of mine which is a prequel to The Guardian Father (well, it happens quite a while before TGF, at least 40-30 years previously). It's how my two main characters met each other, and became a pair.

The Appliance of Science - General/Sci-Fi - Based on Pokemon Movie Seven: Destiny Deoxys, written like I did The Guardian Father for Pokemon Heroes.

A Kiss Of Fire- Romance/General - My first fic that isn't an Eonshipping. Even a fire type can fall in love, even if its kiss burns anything it touches. Benjamin Pepper is about to find this out to his peril as his mother rescues an albino Cyndaquil from the frozen wastelands of the North. It's Human x Quilava, although it may become Human x Typhlosion if she evolves further. May become quite dark. Well, not quite dark, but dark enough to scare people. The later events in it will become quite prominent in SitN, depending on the ending I choose.

If Dragons May Care - Romance/General - This is a remake of The Guardian Father like Kotor made a remake for Shadow Guardian. This version is made to contain considerably more Altoshipping than the original, and including the less prominent Dewshipping. Also, there are some major overhauls to the plot, including a very noticable change to the Latias, which the summary is based on.

Complete:

Murdered Mirth - Parody - Dracoshipping? Cute? Don't make me laugh. You want the real picture of what Rayquaza does when it encouters a Latias? Well... pull up a chair... and a blindfold because it's not pretty. You see, the carnivorous beast can't keep it's busy claws off those girls, but once it's finished with them, you might as well kiss them goodbye, because you sure as hell aren't going to see them again.

Forget-Me-Not - Romance - The worst thing, the absolutly worst thing you can do on Christmas Eve, is not overindulging on turkey, nor is it eating the inedible christmas decorations, it's forgetting the present for those who are dearest to you. Just a little thing for whilst I had writers block on SitN.

A Lover's Lament - Romance/Angst - Another fluffy romance one-shot. Among my worst attempts at fiction.

All Rivers Lead To The Sea - General/Response - Response to the LatiosxLugia challenge set by SilverUmbra. On the border of Rayquazas territory, a solitary Latios guards over a mountain spring. Due to the proximity of the Rayquaza, no Latias could ever settle with him without being savaged by the deranged snake. Dutifully resigning himself to a life of solitude, a botched attempt to capture him by Team Rocket dislodges him from his home, swiftly delivering him to the open arms of the sea.

The Dowsing Machine - General - All it was supposed to be was a glorified compass: A means to locate an end. But some people don't want to be found: Criminals thinking themselves above the rules. Those people will do anything to avoid being brought to justice, but no-one can outrun it for long. It's just a matter of time before you're caught, and sentanced.

Contact - General - AzelfxUxie. Set in the Diamond and Pearl Game Universe, just prior to the beginning of the plans by Team Galactic.

Story Link Overview:

Primary Storyline archive:
These are all the stories that are linked together, with events occuring in one directly affecting the contents of another. The Guardian Father should be read before Strangers in the Night. I wrote them to be read that way. This list is in chronological order, and they all affect each other.

1. A Kiss Of Fire

2. Strangers In The Night

3. The Guardian Father

4. Forget Me Not

5. A Lover's Lament

6. The Appliance of Science

7. Gemstone

8. Snakes and Stones (TBC)

Alternate archive:
Basically, stories that are not part of the main series above, or feature, but are inconsequential to the plots above.

1. If Dragons May Care

2. The Dowsing Machine

3. All Rivers Lead To The Sea

4. Contact

5. Murdered Mirth

6. Rocking The Boat

Media:

Images:
I have an Imageshack account which I use when I make a picture relating to my stories. Unfortunately, the profile editor is still incapable of using links that aren't simply the address.
http://profile.imageshack.us/user/Lateral_Ganon

Music:
When I mention music in my stories, their relevant links can be found here. I've now got a working Youtube account, so you can check that out. So far though, the tracks on it are only relevant to my pending story Then You Look At Me.

SitN:
Danny Elfman: Edward Scissorhands - This page isn't in English, but the track names are. It is reffered to from Chapter 6 onwards.

FMN:
Music for Forget-Me-Not - Read the disclaimer. I was lucky enough to get a copy of this CD at some point, but it may be harder for those that don't have it.

AKOF:
Mount Larsen Theme - You'll know how Youtube works. Technically, its a theme from 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory'. The Tim Burton one not the older one.

Animation Data:

SITN:
Attempt IX - This is waaaaay off in terms of the stories timeline, but it's one of the only parts I have a definate plot for, and half-the basis for making animation frames

The Indigo Effect:

When I write, I listen to a piece of music which I find activates a new level in my imagination. The first incident of this was a Jazz piece called 'The Indigo-Gos' by a fictional band under the same name. Hence the name Indigo Effect. Unfortunately, they periodically wear off, meaning I have to find a new one.

The current track that invokes the Indigo effect:

Down Once More - Phantom of the Opera

Why I Hate DracoShipping (Rayquaza x Latias) Ships So Much:

First, the obvious ones. Rayquaza is ten times bigger than her, and in most cases, thousands of years older. Two obvious enough reasons besides it being genderless. No trousers so to speak. And even if that weren't the case, totally incompatible body shapes: a snake, and a teardrop.

I also doubt that Latias would like someone that is trying to help an evil psycho put the entire planet into subspace. Brawl fans will know what I'm on about. Give that infernal lizard a good kick in the face for me, because I can't get a Wii because of needing the time for working at University

On another note, the seventh pokemon movie offered an insight into the Rayquazas mindset. Since it made an unprovoked attack on the Deoxys pair towards the end when they were celebrating being reunited, its fairly safe to say it has no ability to comprehend romance or affection. Also, exposing Latias to such violence would be life-threatening at the very least.

But the reason that seals it for me though, besides the physical dangers it would put her in, is that she is someone to be respected and revered. If whoever she's with has a status higher than her, then she doesn't get the respect she deserves. As Rayquaza has a much higher technical legendary status, it takes the attention off of her completely. That's just selfish.

Whenever I have to read a Dracoshipping, it physically makes my blood boil. It hurts a lot... an awful lot. Ideally, I avoid them like the plague. The more committing the relationship the story protrays, the more I burn. It actually does happen, and if it wasn't quite nasty to look at, I'd put a picture of the effect just a summary for a work not even written yet has had on it. I burn just thinking about it. Just for the love of god, do not let me read 'What's The Season Got To Do With It?', lest I spontaneously combust from the pain.

Quotes:
Everyone seems to have something on their profiles with humorous quotes. I got bored when stuck with writers block, so I decided I'd bring in my favorite quotes from some of my stories.

Ego:
“Kenai, you know the pink Typhlosion that came in with Geraint?” Moxis said on the radio. Geraint looked up with apprehension.
“Not personally, but I know of her existence. What of it?”
“She’s bored, and she wants to go around the town. Specifically with him.” Moxis said. Geraint beamed.
“I’m avail-”
“You’re not the only male in this building Geraint. Get a hold of your ego before it breaks something.”

Kenai to Geraint regarding Laura: Strangers In The Night.

Courage:
“Fine. But knock me out first.”
“Punch to the face or hypnosis? Which-” Kenai began.
“Hypnosis.” Kotor interrupted angrily.
“Very well. Look into my eyes.” Kenai said. The Gallade obeyed, but noticed there was nothing unusual about Kenai’s eyes.
“What sort of stunt are you trying to-” The Gallade was knocked to the floor as Kenai’s fist slammed into his jaw. Geraint winced.
“Was that really necessary?”
“Well what would you have done? Let him walk all over you?” Kenai answered, the barest hint of a smile playing over his face, “I was going to ask him which one he thought was the wusses option. He was going to get punched anyway.”

Kenai knocking out Kotor for a Blood Sample: Strangers In The Night.

Love:
“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. I wrapped a piece of cloth around the bad areas, and most of the pain is gone.”
“Most?” Ganon asked tenderly. Laura sighed to herself at the gesture.
“Well, it’s fine now. It was just a little pain in the chest, but it just disappeared about a second ago.” She purred softly.
“That’s the sternum. It does that.” Ganon said calmly. Laura looked up in shock.
“Ganon?!”
“What?” He called back. The boy was absolutely clueless sometimes.

Ganon and Laura on being jumped by bullies: Strangers In The Night.

Idiocy:
“What? Really? Well I hadn't noticed at all (!) I just thought someone was having a very large barbecue somewhere (!)”
“Shut up!” Moxis yelled. Both eons looked at him shocked.
“Lucario, don't you know that you shouldn't-” Loki began.
“Interrupt a conversation between men?” X interrupted. Moxis looked back at X and sighed.
“Do you have any idea how stupid you sounded then? You interrupted to tell me not to interrupt.”

Moxis (Lucario) interupting Loki's Melodrama and X's sarcasm: The Guardian Father.

Patience:
“I thought you didn't have time to catch up.” Melissa said smirking slightly. Ganon growled at her.
“Well if you would walk faster, we wouldn't have time to.”
“Well I'm an old girl now. I'm not as fast as I used to be. They say patience came with age too, which explains why you still look no older than seventeen.”
“Touché.” Ganon said, nodding slightly.

Melissa taking Ganon and Larkspur underground: The Guardian Father.

Two Left Feet:
“I shouldn’t have-”
“If you say you pushed her too hard, I’ll slap you. She wanted to come to this ball as much as any of us girls did. It’s just because of you two masquerading as humans, it’ll take longer for her to get ready.”
“Yeah...” Ganon said, nodded slightly as he thought it over. The Marill continued.
“Or she could be trying to spare her feet from you standing on them.” She offered helpfully. Ganon groaned.
“Thanks for the vote of confidence, Alicia (!)”

Alicia attempting to reassure Ganon: A Lover's Lament.

Magic:
“I wanted us to become friends.”
“So your idea of friendship is trying to punch me?” Tory asked quietly. May took the opportunity to argue their cause.
“That’s just temper getting the better of him. He’s not really as bad as you think he is. He’s really sweet when you get to know him.”
Ash blushed at May’s compliment, and Max’s glasses whited over again suggesting another scathing remark was imminent.
“And May’s a magician with food. She’s just turned Ash into a beetroot.” He said cheekily. May glared at her brother evilly, and Ash’s blush turned an even deeper shade of scarlet.

Ash trying to make friends with Tory, assisted by May and Max: The Appliance of Science.

Absolutely Clueless:
“Look. Sometimes I feel… feelings… that I don’t understand.”
“That’s called confuse ray.”
“It’s not a confuse ray!”
“Tormented?”
“No!”
“Attracted?”
“N-Yes! It’s like attract.”
“Ooh.” He whispered. Laura blushed.
“Yeah. I think I-”
“Has Larkspur been putting something in your food?”
“No!” Laura shouted at him. Ruining the moment again.

Laura trying to confess her love to Ganon... again: Strangers In The Night.

Truth:
“Then why are you so shaky.” Moxis asked. Ganon blushed.
“Well… nah… you won’t believe it.”
“Try me.”
“Well… Teal… kissed me.” Ganon said. Laura looked scandalized, and Moxis snorted.
“I don’t believe you.”
“I told you you wouldn’t.”

Ganon getting kissed by Teal: Strangers In The Night.

Even A Genius:
“Calm down Lazlo.” Kenai said, spinning around slowly to face them in his swivel chair at the end of the table. Lazlo frowned.
“You look like a typical clichéd evil boss when you do that.” He answered. Kenai raised one bushy eyebrow at him.
“Well… do I look like your evil cliché boss if I do this?” He placed his feet on the floor underneath his chair, and kicked. The chair began spinning around in a flurry, and Kenai could be heard yelling something from the middle.
“WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
Everyone at the table face faulted. As the chair began to slow down, he put his hands on the table to stop himself.
“Now how do I look?” He said to Lazlo. The Lucario made twitching movements at his nose. Kenai sighed and turned his moustache so it was no longer vertical, “Now to business.”

Kenai heading a meeting among his Head's of Staff: Strangers In The Night.

She's a Friend:
“It just… Loki… you kissed Bianca.” She answered. Loki’s eyes widened to dinner plate proportions.
“She kissed me!” He answered quickly. The Latias didn’t look convinced.
“You kissed her back.” She answered irritably. Loki started blushing profusely.
“But… just… it was only a peck on the cheek.”
“Oh. So you were trying to attack her?!” She fumed. Loki started babbling too quickly to understand, and she shook her head.
“You’re just unbelievable.” She said angrily, swooping down among the racers.

Lani (Latias) confronting Loki (Latios): If Dragons May Care.

Innocent as Candy?:
“Hey Mew...” Cresselia whispered, shaking the brightly coloured bag in front of her, “I brought candy.”
Mew took one glance at the confectionary, before sending it flying towards a corner of the room with a violent swipe of his tail. Within seconds, the tiny cats face was a matter of millimetres from her own.
“All of you... every time one of you visits, you bring candy. Sugar. Sweets. I'm diabetic for goodness sake! Stop trying to kill me!”
“Whats w-wrong with th-that? Everyone g-gives cuties c-c-candy. D-doesn't mean you have t-to eat it. Its the g-gesture that counts.” Cresselia stuttered, uncomfortable with the close proximity. Mew grimaced, deeply offended, floating over to a predominantly black poster on the wall, featuring a very spiky rock band. Pinned to the corner was a photo of Mew adorned in a spiky belt and bracelets, black eye shadow, and black streaks of dye in his fur. The image of a heavy metal fan.
“I'm not cute! Put me in a mosh-pit, and I'll kick your ass!”He shouted back to her, before smoothing out the fur on the top of his head, “I need a drink. Where's the bar?”

Potential for a multi-legendary fic in future. Likely to be a T.

Melting points:
“Everyone's left because phosphorous is dangerous. It can melt people.” Moxis said matter of factly. Lani tilted her head at the canine.
“Erm... what's the chance it's going to melt him?”
“Just 60 percent...” He answered, checking the clock again. Lani gasped, pressing her claws to the glass.
“60 percent?!”
“Hey, relax. We got it down a lot, its not like we don't know what we're doing.”
“What did you get it down from?”
“100 percent...”

Moxis and Lani - situation classified: Gemstone.

Above Emotion:
“Hey, don’t back mouth me, snack, it’s not my fault.”
“Am I supposed to take pity on you?” She asked, “The people that need pity the most are the ones that give it the most. You never pitied any of your victims.”
“So what?!” It snarled, “I don’t do pity. I don’t do love. They’re soppy, worthless things.”
“You should learn then.” She said, “Maybe then you’d actually find someone that welcomed your presence.”

A Rayquaza talking to a Latias: Murdered Mirth

Story Off-Cuts:

All Rivers Lead To The Sea: After the Rawst Berry Incident.

“How long do I have to wait before I can go?” He asked her calmly.

“Well… whenever you feel ready now.” She said remorsefully. He looked at his wing, the burn mark fading quickly. He flexed it experimentally, with no signs of pain. He looked over his shoulder as he heard the girl move over next to him. Her face was pensive

The Lugia settled down opposite him, looking out into the ocean.

“It’s a lovely view here isn’t it?” She asked him. He nodded absently as he looked at her, then jolted and quickly spun around to look at the ocean outside when he realised what he’d effectively just said.

DAMN! He thought loudly to himself. She blushed as she noticed his response, and smiled. There were no other Lugia in the oceans around Kraith, and like the Eon had been, she often found herself lonely. Even if there were any more nearby, she was still very young by Lugia standards, and she was only the size of the Latios anyway.

She got back up, moving towards the back of the cave, and the Latios turned around to watch her. She was a graceful mover at the very least he thought as he watched her. He mentally slapped himself for even thinking it.

“What’s your name?” She asked him casually. He coughed, still trying to regain his composure.

“Lolonyo.” He answered, his voice croaking slightly in embarrassment.

“Oh.” She said blushing, “Mine’s Felicity. It means happiness.”

Lolonyo turned away from her to hide the fact his face was now crimson.

“I really should be going now.” He said, his voice breaking as he struggled to maintain the proud demeanour. Felicity looked around at him, noticing he was shaking a lot.

At this point, I gave up with this line as it would have become very fluffy very quickly, and frankly dull. Besides, giving them names with meaning turns them into Mary Sues.

Shipping by numbers

Having seen about half a dozen of these, I thought I might as well too. They generally end up funny.

List twelve of your favorite characters from your fandom, in no particular order.

1. Lucario

2. Glaceon

3. Mew

4. Quilava

5. Lugia

6. Latios

7. Darkrai

8. Feraligatr

9. Riolu

10. Swampert

11. Latias

12. Blaziken

1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven (Latios/Latias) fic? Do you want to?

Read them? I write them! And obviously if I write them, I'd want to read them. Shame there aren't really that many.

2. Do you think Four (Quilava) is hot? How hot?

Is that a trick question? 800 Centigrade? I dunno. I don't carry a thermometer.

3. What would happen if Twelve (Blaziken) got Eight (Feraligatr) pregnant?

The Blaziken would need to be hospitalised from the love bites.

4. Can you recall any fics about Nine (Riolu)?

Well, Kotor started one ages ago, and I've got one as a main sideliner, but none as a main.

5. Would Two (Glaceon) and Six (Latios) make a good couple?

Maybe, but it's one of my favorite pairs for throwing sparks off each other so definately not going to become a couple in my stories.

6. Five(Lugia)/Nine(Riolu) or Five (Lugia)/Ten (Swampert)? Why?

Well Riolu isn't physically possible cos its a baby pokemon, so I guess only Swampert can apply.

7. What would happen if Seven (Darkrai) walked in on Two (Glaceon) and Twelve (Blaziken) having sex?

He'd make everyone else suffer that image in their worst nightmares.

8. Make up a summary for a Three (Mew) /Ten (Swampert) fic.

A Mew, bored of the usual life of being worshipped, plays a prank on an unsuspecting and lonely Swampert by transforming into another Swampert, offering a glimmer of companionship before snatching it away.

9. Is there any such thing as One (Lucario) /Eight (Feraligatr) fluff?

Only for those with a rather warped imagiantion... like the person that invented Dracoshipping...

10. Suggest a title for a Seven (Darkrai) /Twelve (Blaziken) hurt/comfort fic.

Ashe's to Ashe's

11. Does anyone on your friends list read Three (Mew) het?

Only someone that showed me a Mew catgirl picture once (after which all catgirls had to die)

12. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven (Latias)?

Well, there are a lot of us that adore her like the godess she is, so yes.

13. Would anyone on your friends list write Two (Glaceon)/Four (Quilava)/Five (Lugia)?

I suppose KotorPlayerVII might if he got some good inspiration for it.

14. If you wrote a Song-fic about Eight (Feraligatr), what song would you choose?

'Never Smile At A Crocodile' (Yes, this actually exists.)

15. If you wrote a One (Lucario) /Six (Latios) /Twelve (Blaziken) fic, what would the warning be?

Warning: May mirror Chapter 14 of 'The Guardian Father'.

16. When was the last time you read a fic about Five (Lugia)?

Actually quite a long time ago now...

17. "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (9) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3).

Lucario and Darkrai are in a happy relationship until Riolu runs off with Quilava. Lucario, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Latias and a brief unhappy affair with Blaziken, then follows the wise advice of Lugia and finds true love with Mew.

17. What title would you give this fic?

'You Steel My Heart Away'

18. How would you feel if Seven (Darkrai) /Eight (Feraligatr) was canon?

I'd wonder how much paint thinner the writers had been drinking. Probably several gallons. Per night.

Shipping by numbers 2

Chose 10 of your OC's. Or ten of your favourite people. (Like friends, family, celebrities. Anyone you think is cool.) But you can't choose yourself.

1. Quilava
2. Lugia
3. Glaceon
4. Lucario
5. Darkrai
6. Latias
7. Feraligatr
8. Latios
9. Mew
10. Alakazam

1) 4 (Lucario) invites 3 (Glaceon) and 8 (Latios) to dinner at their house. What happens?

Lucario: Can I have a promotion yet Melissa?
Glaceon: No.
Lucario: Damn it. But you gave Ganon a promotion.
Latios: Yeah, but I can eat bolognaise properly.
Lucario, struggling to disentangle himself from the pasta: Not my fault!

2) 9 (Mew) tries to get 5 (Darkrai) to go to a yoga class. What happens?

Darkrai Dark-Voids Mew, and gives him curls with the help of Lugia.

3) You need to stay at a friend’s house for the night. Do you choose 1 (Quilava) or 6 (Latias)?

Latias definitely. If they were both friends of mine, I’d no doubt have proposed to Latias already, so we'd be on very friendly terms.

4) 2 (Lugia) and 7 (Feraligatr) are making out. 10 (Alakazam) walks in...What is their reaction?

Alakazam: What the hell?! Adam, you said you were just going for a coffee! Now I find you tangled up in the wings of a Legendary?!
Lugia: (Flies off in embarrassment.)
Feraligatr: Come on! She was hot and lonely! I couldn’t say no.
Alakazam: You’re still cleaning up after Clair.
Feraligatr: Noooooooooo!!

5) 3 (Glaceon) falls in love with 6 (Latias). 8 (Latios) is jealous. What happens?

Latios: Melissa, do you know what gender all Latias are?
Glaceon: You mean that’s not Lazlo?
Latios: How much have you been- (spots half a dozen empty vodka bottles behind her) Ah.

6) 4 (Lucario) jumps you in a dark alleyway. Who comes to your rescue? 10 (Alakazam), 2 (Lugia) or 7 (Feraligatr)?

Feraligatr. No one would argue with those teeth.

7) 1 (Quilava) decides to start a cooking show. 15 minutes later what is happening?

The whole studio is on fire, as well as the next seven buildings downwind.

9) 3 (Glaceon) has to marry either 8 (Latios), 4 (Lucario) or 9 (Mew). Who do they chose?

Mew. Don’t know why, but since Lazlo’s as good as dead, she won’t be going for another Lucario.

10) 7 (Feraligatr) kidnaps 2 (Lugia) and demands something from 5 (Darkrai) for 2 (Lugia)'s release. What is it?

Feraligatr: Hey! Get me a jetpack, or Lugia gets killed.
Darkrai: Do I care?
Lugia: Hey… weren’t we making out earlier?
Feraligatr: What? You’re the same Lugia from earlier?
Lugia: (Nods)
Feraligatr: Oh! I didn’t know! Sorry.
Lugia: Now where were we? (Continues making out, much to Darkrai’s terror)
Darkrai: Argh! Fine! Here’s your jetpack! Just don’t do that in front of me!

11) You get to meet either 1 (Quilava) or 6 (Latias). Who do you chose?

Why would I propose to someone I wouldn’t yearn to meet? Latias of course!

12) 10 (Alakazam) challenges 4 (Lucario) to a chariot race. Why?

He needs to test out a new chariot-like gadget he just invented, and rather than crash tests, he decides to have fun for once.

13) Everyone gangs up on 3 (Glaceon). Does 3 (Glaceon) have a chance in hell?

Erm… no.

14) Everyone is invited to 2 (Lugia) and 10’s (Alakazam) wedding except for 8 (Latios). How do they react?

He didn’t need to be invited. He was the best man.

15) Why is 6 (Latios) afraid of 7 (Feraligatr)?

Have you seen those teeth?

16) 10 (Alakazam) gathers everyone around to tell them a fairy tale. How does it go?

Alakazam: Once upon a time, there was a big bad Pokemon named Deoxys. He was very powerful, and tried to bring an end to all happi-
Feraligatr: Dude, quit it with the war stories. Lazlo told it better.
Alakazam: Shut up.

17) 1 (Quilava) arrives late for 2 (Lugia) and 10 (Alakazam)'s wedding. What happens? And why are they late?

Quilava: Stop the ceremony!
Everyone else: What?! Why?
Lugia: (shuffles awkwardly)
Quilava: You see… (Dramatic pause) We’re lovers.
Everyone else: (gasps)
Alakazam: Is this true?!
Feraligatr: Trust me. It’s true. She wouldn’t even go as far as tongues with me.
Alakazam: Yeah, because you’d probably bite it off.
Feraligatr: Take that back!
A massive brawl ensues between Alakazam and Feraligatr, whilst Lugia and Quilava slip out unnoticed. Mew starts playing Bohemian Rhapsody on the church organ, turning the whole chapel into a giant mosh pit.

18) 5 (Darkrai) and 9 (Mew) get roaring drunk and end up at your house. What happens?

Mew starts smashing up the furniture, bawling lyrics about death and blood, whilst Darkrai is huddled up in the corner, holding a fly-swatter, swatting at the air.

19) 3 (Glaceon), 8 (Latios), 6 (Latias) and 4 (Lucario) all go to the zoo for 8 (Latios)'s birthday party. How does it go? What presents do they get 8 (Latios)?

Within ten minutes, they get bored, causing Lucario to ‘accidentally’ release half of the animals. After hiding and watching hordes of tourists being chased by Rhyhorns, they call it a day and return to the Hotel. Glaceon got Latios a pack of playing cards, Lucario got him a DVD of The Nightmare Before Christmas, and Latias keeps putting it off, saying that she’d give him his present ‘tonight’, before breaking into giggles again.

20) Everyone gets together and starts protesting something outside your house. What are they protesting? What do you do?

They are protesting that I don’t write often enough. I open a window and yell at them that I’m too busy with work for University, and most of them continue pacing around. The Latias looks up forlornly, tugging at my heartstrings, and forcing me to live up to my rule of always making time for a Latias, and I resume writing about her.

21) 9 (Mew) murders 2 (Lugia)’s best friend. What does 2 (Lugia) do to get back at them?

Lugia: Mew, I’m going to make you wish you were never born.
Mew (not really caring): Yeah sure…
Lugia: (Pulls out a box of very girly fur accessories) Are you sure?
Mew: (Screams in terror as Lugia forcibly applies the makeup)

22) 6 (Latias) and 1 (Quilava) are in mortal danger. Only one of them can survive. Does 6 (Latias) save themselves or 1 (Quilava)?

Under normal circumstances, a Latias’s priority is to help others, but just as she’s about to rescue Quilava, Lugia dives in and snatches her fiancée out of harm, allowing Latias to escape unharmed.

23) Which one of them is most likely to fail at life?

Ooh… tough one… I suppose Feraligatr because he’d never be able to get a kiss in his life with those teeth.
Feraligatr: Oh thanks for the confidence booster(!)

24) 5 (Darkrai) is trapped in a cave. 10 (Alakazam) comes to rescue them. What happens?

Darkrai: Go away. I’m meditating.
Alakazam: May I join you?
Darkrai: Sure. Just don’t distract me.
They start meditating together, and as far as I’m aware, they’re still in that cave.

25) 3 (Glaceon) starts a day camp. What happens?

Glaceon: Hi-de-hi campers! Who knows what we’re going to do today?
Lucario: Yeah, we’re-
Glaceon: Shut up! I’m in charge here, so don’t talk unless I tell you to.

26) 4 (Lucario), 6 (Latias), and 7(Feraligatr) are doing the Hokey-Pokey. 8 (Latios) walks in. What happens?

Latios: Hi sweetheart. What’s with the dancing?
Latias: Well, Mew made a rock version of this, to try and show he could still rock even though Lugia made him pink and fluffy again.
Latios: He failed… badly.
Feraligatr: Hey! Wait up; I can’t do all the ins and outs! My legs are too short!
Everyone else: (facefaults)

27) 1 (Quilava) starts to write a fan-fiction where 9 (Mew) and 10 (Alakazam) are going out. What is 2 (Lugia)'s reaction?

Lugia: (Inspects the story) Ooh my! Nice way to tell my ex he was a jerk. Can I have a copy?
Quilava: Sure. (Photocopies the page)
Lugia: Heh heh heh. (Mails it to Alakazam) That ought to teach him to actually delete my cell-phone number rather than prank me with it. Can I have another copy?
Quilava: Why?
Lugia: So I can blackmail him again later. Once it not enough.

28) 7 (Feraligatr) makes an apple pie. Is it any good?

What apple pie? He ate it before we knew it was finished.

29) 8 (Latios) and 3 (Glaceon) go camping. For some reason they forget to bring any food. What do they do?

Latios: Sod this, I’m going home. Latias will be waiting for me.
Glaceon: Sure. I don’t like the outdoors, I think I’m allergic.

30) While they are camping, they run into The Blair Witch. What do they do? (If you haven't seen that movie pretend they ran into the Bogyman or something like that instead.)
(Used: Oogie Boogie from The Nightmare Before Christmas)

Oogie Boogie: Well well well, what have we here? A Latios, huh? Ooh, I’m really scared (!)
Latios: What the hell are you?
Oogie Boogie: Mr Oogie Boogie says, there's trouble close at hand, you’d better pay attention, ’cos I’m the bogeyman!
Latios: Whatever. (Continues past)
Oogie Boogie: Hey! You’re supposed to pay attention.
Latios: (Sprays Oogie Boogie with pesticide. Oogie Boogie collapses.)

31) The quiz is over. What does everyone go do now?

Latios returns to the warm embrace of Latias, Lugia and Quilava arrange a marriage, Darkrai and Alakazam are still in the cave, Glaceon resumes having shouting matches with Lucario, Feraligatr pines over his inability to kiss anyone, and Mew has taken over the chapel and uses the organ twenty-four hours a day as a gothic rock-venue, writing his own tracks of general woe and misery, although the girlish trinkets in his fur leave a lot to be desired for his reputation.