My Name:Mary

my bday:July 24th

age:17

Lives in USA

i'm obsessed with books specially twilight new moon eclipse and harry potter but i have glasses now but not lik harrys -.- lol

I'm not a journalist I'm a vet (or want to be)

though i do love writing

This stuff down here is hilarious

A good Friend helps you up when u fall...A best friend will say "walk much dumb-ass?"

a good friend will wipe your tears away when your rejected...a best friend will go up to him and say "its because your gay isn't it?"

a good friend will lend you there umbrella when its raining...a best friend will take yours and say "run bitch run"

Favorite Quotes

This Kitchen is Bitchin'

-- Accepted DEATH! YOU ARE MY BITCH LOVER!!--

Wedding Crashers

"Hello, I am Shannon the gay boy that wished you into existence, take care of my planet for me, I am gay, GOOOD - BYEEEEE!"

The good die young... Us bitches live forever!!

-emo accent- Hi... I'm cocoa, the happy fish...

Forever isn't as long as it use to be.

IT'S IN YOU FREAKIN CAT!! OMC

-Since Edward is a perfect angel, and God created angels, and Carlisle created Edward, into a vampire, so God is Carlisle. that and every one of us woke up, saw Carlisle, and thought he was God.

A good friend will comfort you when he breaks up with you.

A BEST friend will call him, whispering "Seven days..."

Huh, it figures. All the good guys are taken, vampires, or both.

All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

If you don't like me, there is nothing I can do. Here's a newsflash Honey, I don't live to please you.

Emmet Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You since 1901

Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!

After I read New Moon, I tried to book a plane down to Forks, so I could kick Jacob's werewolf ass!

There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...

Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back

Having the love of your life say "we can still be friends", is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it

. My knight in shining armour turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought

My Gay-dar is ponting at you madly, in your tight jeans and man make-up... I think there's something wrong with it...

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

Before you critisize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door.

An apple away keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole!

I live in a world of Rainbows, hearts and Unicorns. The rainbow is only in shades of grey and black, The hearts are broken and bleeding and the unicorn are cutting them selves with their horns... All in all it's my perfect life=D

Guys with Emo hair are like a billion times more sexy than other guys.

'It's always in the last place you look' Well DUR! Because you stop looking after you find it! HELLO!

My goal in life is to have everyone I have ever come into contact with fall in love with Twilight series, and, more importantly, EDWARD!

You're intoxocated by my very presence

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

Life was so simple when boys had cooties

I make the cowardly lion look like the terminator!

I stay as confused as a gangster with a skateboard

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I could tell you what happened in the first chapter of Eclipse, but then I would have to kill you.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

Did you stab Edward Cullen with a pencil or what?

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

Dear Heart, I met a boy today, prepair to shatter.

Oh him? He just has the most ah-dorable eyes you could ever fall for, and the cutest smile that will take your breath away And he has the ability to make you laugh when the world just wants you to frown. COPY AND PASTE!!

If people mistake you for a vampire (cough cough or you are one cough cough)...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If they are right...copy and paste this into your profile

If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

92 percent of American teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch/American Eagle told them it was uncool to breathe. If you are one of the 8 percent who would stand there and laugh, copy this into your profile.

If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which makes weird good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy & paste this onto your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.(All the time.)

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile (See above)

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile(it was hilarious to)

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy this into your profile

If you don’t dance to avoid injury to yourself and those around you, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever ran into a tree, copy this to your profile!

If you wish more people were like your friends on fanfic, copy and paste this onto your pro

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you know what a lemon fly is, copy and paste this into your profile(for those who dont, it is a mythicle lemon with wings. ha! now you know!!)

If you have a problem with counsoulors, copy and paste!!

If you've ever misspelled your own fanfic screenname, copy and paste this onto your pro

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

AACIBD is Addicted to All Cullen’s Including Bella Disorder.

AV is Addicted to Vampires

ADHD is Automatic Death by Hyperness Disorder

If you're a proud stalker and obsessed love-struck of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, copy this into your profile

If you are absolutly in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional charater Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Fred should just let Barney have the freakin' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, then copy and paste this in your profile.

98 of teenagers do drugs, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.

If you think the semi-colon is completely usless, stupid, annoying and plotting to destroy the English language as we know it, put this in your pro!

If you think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in ur pro!

If whenever you see or hear the name "Edward" you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much, and then people stare at you, copy and paste this into your profile

if you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been pushed into an ice-cold pool copy and paste this into your profil

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If keyboards hate you copy and paste this into your profile! (Especially the FREAKING CAPS LOCK!!)

If you horrible at taking directions... copy and paste to your profile...

If you've ever read/started to read a chapter in a fan fiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

If you think that losers hate/don't get Twilight, copy this into your profile.

If when you have a child, you'd consider naming them Edward or Anthony, copy this into your profile. (I think Edward's REALLY scared right now...)

If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've reread TWILIGHT over four times...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've had at least two friends move away from you...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever stayed up all night just to watch the sunrise, copy and paste this onto your pro

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

if there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile

if you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've met your not-blood related twin (in resemblance or personality), copy and paste this in your profile(dude, it was weird)

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever gotten a paper-cut on your lips from kissing Twilight, copy and paste this onto your pro

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you becasue of the effects, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight that whenever you hear thunder you think of vampires playing baseball.Copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever tried blocking your thoughts about how georgous Edward Cullen is because you don't want said georgous Edward Cullen to hear, copy and paste this into your profile

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy and paste this into your profile

If you are not one of those people who thinks having over 1 thousand friends on myspace is a contest copy this to your profile

You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volterra" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile

If you think that TWILGHT is the best book known to woman (and man)...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've reread TWILIGHT and NEW MOON and ECLIPSE over ten times...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever forgotten how old you are when someone asked you, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think iPods were gifts from the gods copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you cried when Edward left Bella in New Moon copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your family/friends/people around you stared at you when you did the aforementioned, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune. (okay, really, who the hell knew)

If you went to sleep at around 2 am reading Twilight and/or New Moon and/or Eclipse, copy and pastes this onto your profile.(3am-4am for me)

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have ever crashed into a wall while you were sugar high, copy onto profile

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your pro

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your

If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile

if you copy and paste stuff onto your profile cuz you want your profile to be really long, copy and paste this to make it even longer

If you truely believe, there is an Edward Cullen somewhere for you (Doesn't mean his name has to be Edward Cullen), copy this into your profile

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

Copy this into your profile if, even though he's a drug addict crazy depressed emo guy, you idolize Fang!

If you love Max Ride and cannot live without it, post this in your profile.

If Faxness is one of your obsessions, post this in your profile.

If you love the whole blind, pyro, mutant, baker thing about Iggy, post this in your profile.

If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.

If your view on Maximum Ride is that there are much worse things you could be addicted to, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have ever been kidnapped and nearly eaten by evil flying squirrels before your vampire boyfriend saved you, then you found a flamethrower and vanquished the squirrels shouting “Die, squirrel beasts, die!”, copy this into your profile.

If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend then copy this to your profile

believe it or not, i did all of these things xP

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why.
"5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favourite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I’m a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude

I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth.

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naïve

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.

I’m WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer.

I’m A GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress

I’m a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone’s ass

I’m a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian

I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant

I’m FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual

I’m a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict

I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian

I’m a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie

I’m INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs

I’m a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math

I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare

I'm PUNK, so I MUST cut my wrists

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist

I'm IRISH, so I MUST be a alcoholic

I'm BLOND, so I MUST be a stupid ditz

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore

I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy

I have A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS so I MUST be dating them all

I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd

I love RENT so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS.

I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST believe in heaven.

Stereotypes suck! Copy, paste & add.

you call me weird well-weird is different; different is unique; unique is what nature is; nature is beautiful; so you just called me beautiful thank you for the complement

Hey you! I know you're just dying to do this!!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, and green, yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7. Your favorite number?

8. Do you like California or Florida more?

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Are you done? If so, scroll down (Don’t cheat--)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose: Red: You are alert and your life is full of love. Black: You are conservative and aggressive. Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back. Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you Love. Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are Down.

3. If you’re initial is: A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life. L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to Blossom. S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in: Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you Fall in love with someone totally unexpected. Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but The memories will last forever. July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life Changing experience for the good. Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your Soul mate.

5. If you choose... Black: Your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time But will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change. White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do Anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose... California: You like adventure. Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose... Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved. Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

( ) ( )(")_(")
This is Bunny.
Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination.

You know you live in 2008 when...

1.) You accidentaly enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) and you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

~10 Ways To Act Like A Retard~

1.PULL ON A PUSH DOOR

2.TALK BACKWARDS

3.SAY YOUR GOING TO MOW THE CAT AND FEED THE LAWN.

4.SAY RAMDOM THINGS.

5.WHEN YOU HEAR YOUR NAME SAY DUMM DUMM DUMM.

6.GO TO A ITAL LION RESTAURANT AND ASK FOR SUSHI.

7.TRY TO SPEAK JAPANESSE TO A SPANISH LADY.

8.TRY TO PAY WITH A CREDIT CARD AT MC DONALDS FOR A 1 DOLLAR THING.

9.ASK YOURSELF A QUESTION AND THEN ANSWER IT.

10.RUN AROUND WITH YOUR EYES WIDE OPEN YELLING "I'M A TREE STUMP"!

~~10 Ways To Be S-T-U-P-I-D:

1. Ask For Directions To A Place You're Already At.

2. Try To Order Pizza From McDonalds.

3. Get Hit By A Parked Car.

4. Try To Watch Saturday Cartoons On A Thursday.

5. Try To Sell Your Money.

6. Try To Play The Alphabet On The Piano.

7. Eat All You Can Eat At A Store.

8. Get Into A Fight With Yourself And Lose.

9. Try To Go Swimming Without Getting Wet.

10. Ask For Diet Water At A Restaurant

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM IN THE SOUTH

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads: Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went for more ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls, they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside.

"Cooter"