Hi! I'm Liana-Wolfe to you. And that fine looking gent in my avatar is Dr. Nicholas Rush from Stargate Universe.

I strive to become a professional writer someday.

Anyway. I hope you enjoy my stories.

--quotes--

"I don't know what Jak's last name is but people online say it's Mar... But isn't his real first name Mar? If that's true his father named him Mar Mar... GO MAR MAR!" -Me after excessive amount of sugar

"Daxter get out of the metaphor!" -Me while playing Jak 3

Dad: (In reference to my five hour Jak 3-a-thon) Remember to blink
Me: (Deadpanning) It's hard to.

Maegan(Little sister): (Coming into room after hearing me listening to Taylor Swift) Got ya hooked, didn't I?
Me: Dmn you!

Me: (After my cat jumps from the floor to the top of my 4 1/2 foot dresser) Holy sht Elvis!

Me: Oh... Bloody jump! (Bloody jump = Fck or Dmn)
Jill(Older sister): "Bloody jump"?
Me: I'm trying to cut back on swearing.
Jill: But it creates such a weird mental image.

(Watching return of the king after clicking onto it on TV)

Me: Is that Arwen?
Jill: No.

(Five seconds later)

Me: Is that Arwen?
Jill: No!

(Five seconds later)

Me: Is that Arwen?
Jill: That's not even a woman!

(Five seconds later)

Me: Is that Ar-
Jill: When she comes onto screen I'll tell you!

(Ten seconds later)

Me: Is that Arwen?
Jill: Yes Emma... That is Arwen.

(Five seconds later)

Me: Is that Aragon?
Jill: (Screams)

Me: (After discovering I've been unconsciously giving everyone the vulcan salute) Oh good god... I'm a trekkie.

"If you ever come across someone you think is sane... Run the other way." - my family's motto

Me: I have (I'm making this word up) Hylandrocobaphobia...
Maegan: What's that?
Me: It's a fear of stupid people... And corn.

Maegan: OMiGawd! You have a dckfor on your forehead!
Me: What's a dckfor?
Maegan: (Giggles) procreation.
Me: (Runs words through head until it makes sense) You. Are. A. Sick. Little. Jumper. (Jumper = btch)

"At this point it's no longer about which series has the widest fanbase but about which group of fans can go the longest without sleep..." - Me, in reference to the fact that it is an all out voting war between SGA and Supernatural on Tv.com.

Dad: How did you get so smart?
Me: The UPS guy.
(In reference to an ongoing joke of ours)

Me: Quit sexing me with your eyes!
(... It's a long story)

Dad: (Putting his orange hat away) And that's where it is in case you want to go running around the back yard decked out in orange
Me: But then I'd be stealing your weekend plans...

Jill: Emma, quick, on you're computer, what's the rock's real name
Me: (Not even bothering to look up from my book) Dwayne Johnson
Maegan: Even I knew that

Me: I don't like people, people confuse me.

Me: We all have words that help us to not swear. Mine are various forms of the words 'jump' and the word 'fudoodle'
Mom: "Fudoodle"?
Me: It was a slow day.

Eye doctor assistant: Hello, my name is Annie
Me: Tell me, is this a hard knock life?

"Most families argue over the last piece of pie... My family argues about whether or not 1 is a prime number." - Me, contemplating my strange family.

Mom: Why is there PEZ in the bag?
Me: Because I put it in the cart and you didn't notice?

Me: Enchanted... Die hard 2... Enchanted... Die Hard 2
Maegan: Just choose one! We've been here for twenty minutes!

Me: And I shall become... Mujer Del Queso
Jill: "Woman Of Cheese"?
Me: Si!
(I never did become Mujer Del Queso...)

Me: (Slipping in to a British accent) Oh bloody hll
Tori: (Friend) Since when are you British?
Me: (Still in the British accent) When I'm bloody frustrated, that's when!
(Sorry if this offended anyone.)

"Look, the first loon of the year" Points at bird, man wearing a traffic cone on his head walks by. "And the second" - Me.

(Me and Maegan are reminiscing)
Me: I do remember that in the game we represented the portal with a pillow.
Maegan: We entered the inter net through a pillow?
(Bursts out laughing)

"The way I see it, there is a way to do everything, nothing is impossible, don't ever let anyone discourage you from following your dream" - my motto

Heather(Friend): (After me asking if I should have my birthday party at chuck-e-cheese) There are only two types of people who have their parties at Chuck-E-Cheese. Little kids and insane teenagers.
(Pause)
Me: So that's a yes then?
Heather: Duh.

"In your face elf boy" - Lexi, a character in a comic book I'm working on.

Heather: What's new?
Me: (Running by, Maegan told me about the conversation later) I'm completely and utterly insane!
Maegan: (Watching me) Nothing's really new.

"Okay my little stalker." - My dad after he read the first verse of my SGA version of "The twelve days of Christmas.

"Easiest quest ever - now hand over my 100 gold, wizard." - Me, after getting a box of Band-Aids from the car for my mom.

Melinda(Yet another friend): Emma, why do you have a pair of handcuffs?
Me: It's not as kinky as you're thinking.

"I'm so sinister, just watch me hide behind my cape and twiddle my mustache." - Me, miming the appropriate actions (I seriously feel out of touch with society because none of my friends get the reference.)

"I'm going to have a slice of muffin." - Me.

"It's a figure eight of citrusy goodness." - Me

Abby: I'm a Leoplurodan (Spelling, please?)
Maegan: A magical leoplurodan?
Abby: Yup.
Me: Are you gonna lead us to candy mountain?
Abby: No...

"It's like she sees it but it's not really there." - Me, works best if you put on an awestruck voice and are waving an arm in front of someone's nonreactive face.

"Going senile, back in... Who are you?" - Me, after excessive amounts of pop.

"Stay away from my fat, ticklish knees!" - Me, long story.

(Discussing dinner after seeing Surrogates)
Me: How about Taco Bell?
Dad: We'll think about it.
Me: Better think quick, we're about to pass it.

--Not yet posted fan fiction--

Iron McKay~
This one may take a while, Ironman SGA style (Movie based because that's the only version I've seen.)

Like Father, Like Son~
Old idea, a Canadian intelligence agent comes to Atlantis, guess who he is.

--In progress fan fiction--

Dr... I'm sorry, what was your name again?
Allie's secret is out, but things aren't as easy as she'd hoped.

All in the family
"Who are you? What have you done with Jasmine?"

A New Story
Jak is banished to the wastelands a year early. With Daxter not knowing where he is and rising feelings for a girl banished with him... Can Jak still be the same hero he was destined to be?

McKarter drabbles
A series of drabbles dedicated to my favorite pairing.

Meg Apparition
Meg is sick and tired of being the butt of everyone's jokes and her family not caring for her, with the help of a dreamwalking ghost she gains powers she never dreamed of, but this power comes with temptation, and enemies, will Meg be able to survive?

--Completed stories and songs and crap--

Just another

Star Gatin'

Silly Old John Sheppard

Rodney the red-faced scientist

Stuck In My Dream

I tried so hard

Dr... I'm sorry, what was your name again? Prologue

I want a wraith drone for Christmas

The twelve days of Christmas

'Tis the time

Hidden Pain

Just Another

--Odd facts about me--

1. I will eat practically anything if it has ketchup on it

2. I have what I like to call a catalographic memory. It allows me to catalog things such as what episode goes in which season

3. When I was little I had a nightmare of people in panic the night before 9/11

4. I find slash fiction addicting yet am unable to write it myself

5. Despite the fact that several people say I'm a comedic person I am unable to write very good comedy stories.

6. I'm terrible at naming things

7. I figured out the ending of the sixth sense long before I watched it.

8. I can change the subject very casually.

--My other accounts--

My Fictionpress

My DeviantArt

My LJ account

My RP boards (Check it out)

My Web Comic

--notice board--

24/06/08:
Just accept my apologies for not updating as of late, I was banned from my computer, anyway, it may still take some time because my browser of choice keeps shutting down when I try to go to my account page, leaving me with one I'd rather not use. Wish me luck.

25/06/08
Weird, my story "Brothers?" just disappeared, it may have deleted itself by accident. I'll have it reposted soon, sorry.

25/06/08:
Hidden pain chapter 8 posted.

03/08/08
All in the family posted in Aladdin. Angst/Family

11/10/08
Whoo! Chapter nine of hidden pain finally posted!

11/22/08
There will be no new chapters of any of my stories until January '09. NaNoWriMo (November) And NaNoEdiMo (My little pet name for December) will be taking up my time.

2/12/08
Okay! I lied, chapter ten of hidden pain now posted.

7/12/08
"Dr... I'm sorry, what was your name again? Prologue." Posted in Stargate: Atlantis. Humor/Suspense

13/12/08
"I want a wraith drone for Christmas" posted in Stargate: Atlantis. Humor/Parody

17/12/08
"Dr... I'm sorry, what was your name again?" Posted in Stargate: Atlantis. Humor/Friendship

18/12/08
"Hidden pain" Chapter ten posted.

24/12/08
"The twelve days of Christmas" Posted in Stargate: Atlantis, humor/Parody

25/12/08
" 'tis the time" Posted in Stargate: Atlantis, Humor/Parody

27/12/08
"Hidden pain" Chapter 12 posted

27/12/08
After a long absence on it, "McKarter drabbles" Chapter 14 posted

29/12/08
"McKarter drabbles" Chapter 15 Posted

29/12/08
"McKarter Drabbles" Chapter 16 Posted

07/02/09
Today's headline: "Hidden pain chapter 13 posted: Much rejoicing in Munchkinland"

07/02/09
Extra, Extra: "Chapter 17 of McKarter drabbles posted: Author loves pudding"

07/02/09
Nightly edition: "Author on frenzy: New story 'Meg Apparition' added to Family guy Humor/Supernatural"

09/02/09
"Meg Apparition" Chapter two added.

10/02/09
"Meg Apparition" Chapter three added, also, 'tis my 14th birthday.

11/02/09
"Meg Apparition" Chapter four added.

05/03/09
"Meg Apparition" Chapter seven added, forgot to put the last two chapters on the board and can't remember when I posted them.

08/03/09
"Hidden Pain" Chapter 14 posted.

11/03/09
"Meg Apparition" Chapter 8 Posted

13/03/09
"A different story" Chapter 2 posted.

15/03/09
"Meg Apparition" Chapter 9 posted.

18/03/09
"Hidden pain" Chapter 15 Posted.

19/03/09
"Meg Apparition" Chapter ten posted. W00T!

28/03/09
"Hidden pain" Final chapter posted.

01/04/09
"Meg Apparition Chapter 11 posted, also, hiatus for Script Frenzy, see you all in May.

10/05/09
"How To Survive Atlantis for Dummies" Uploaded to Stargate: Atlantis Humor/Parody

29/05/09
"Meg Apparition" Chapter 12 Uploaded

05/07/09
"Just another" Added to the Stargate: Atlantis Angst

05/07/09
Also the start of my hiatus until County and State Fair are done

20/09/09
First chapter of "Experiment 13" posted To Stargate: Atlantis Drama/Sci-fi

27/09/09
Chapter two of "Experiment 13" posted.

--end note--

And that's that. This program has been made possible be the public broadcasting foundation and from annual donations from viewers like you.

~These mean that I haven't started on them yet.