SORRY EVERYONE! I'VE BEEN ON A LONG HIATUS BUT I'LL TRY TO GET BACK ASAP!

Hi all!

Hmmm... there's not that much to tell about me.

Age- I'm 13 and a few months

looks- straight brown hair and blue eyes, 5' 5.5"

weight- try to find out. I dare you.

Favorites:

Animal: PENGUINS!! I also love dogs especially West Highland White Terriers (Westies) (my dog)

Color: Any shade of blue, purple, some greens and pinks

Books: Twilight (WOOT!!), Harry Potter, Among the Hidden, Maximum Ride

I also love to draw and write. I have a cute little 10 year old West Highland white Terrier, Scamper, whom i love and an older brother whom i annoy (avidly and with enthusiasm).

Stories

We Did Well- a simple (but long) story of Edward and Bella (all human) having three kids, Lucy, Mason, and Katie. Goes through their childhoods and love stories. COMPLETE!!

Smooth Sailing- Bella and Emmett are brother and sister working on a cruise ship. Things are normal for them until a certain green eyed man, as well as some new friends, comes crashing (rather literally) into Bella's life.

What to do Today Emmett?- A random story about Emmett being Emmett. PERMANENT HIATUS!!

Oneshot Mania- a collection of songfic oneshots.

Twilight Goes Amanda!- a series of Amanda show skits with Twilight characters. Just for fun!

Oneshots

When Cows Fly- there was this story on fark.com about a cow falling on a car in Washington! I just had to tweak some things and apply the Twilight characters to the situation and voila! A story was born!

How Alice and Jasper Came to the Cullens- a fun story using facts from the book about when Alice and Jasper first met the Cullens.

I Love the Whole World- a short songfic (I guess I could call it that) of the Twilight characters singing the Discovery channel commercial song. POST BD

When We Were Young- I was wondering what Seth and Leah were like when they were little, before all the unnatural stuff came into play. Just some cuteness!

Dating for Dummies- A funny story about Bella, Edward, Mike, and Jacob on a dating game show together. A strange host and weird questions complete this.

Lucy's Locket in chapter 23 of We Did Well: http://www.zales.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2452230&cp=&pg=3&sr=1&fbc=0&origkw=locket&kpc=1&kw=lockets&parentPage=search&searchId=24563654844

Lucy's wedding dress in chapter 29 of We Did Well: http://www.dress-my-wedding.bridalsnet.com/displayitem.asp

Lucy's hairstyle in chapter 29 of We Did Well: http://www.knotforlife.com/style/hairstyle/curls-updo-diamonds.shtml

Sophie's ring in chapter 39 of We Did Well: http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://a248.e.akamai.net/7/248/2375/v022/www.ice.com/productimages/rdb765450_b_b.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.justaskleslie.com/index.php/category/how-to-buy-a-diamond/page/2/&h=120&w=180&sz=7&hl=en&start=109&tbnid=uzdSB3lyDhGfUM:&tbnh=67&tbnw=101&prev=/images3Fq3Dwedding2Bring2Bwhite2Bgold2Bone2Bdiamond2Bthin2Bband26start3D10826gbv3D226ndsp3D1826hl3Den26sa3DN

Katie's shirt in chapter 44 of We Did Well (imagine it in brown): http://www.internet-workwear.co.uk/acatalog/946F.jpg

Katie's wedding dress in chapter 48 of We Did Well: http://weddingvendorguide.files.wordpress.com/2007/04/dress.jpg

Sarah's flower girl dress in chapter 48 of We Did Well: http://www.tinascollection.com/images/joleen/white_joleen01.jpg

Lucy and Sophie's bridesmaid's dresses in chapter 48 of We Did Well: http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41cl5Qv3yyL.jpg

The song I Love the World: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5BxymuiAxQ

READ MY STORIES!

If you're a proud stalker and obsessed love-struck fan-girl of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, copy this into your profile.

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile

If you've reread TWILIGHT over ten times...copy and paste this onto your profile.

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off

If whenever you see or hear the name "Edward" you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much, and then people stare at you, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile

My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend then copy this to your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If you are absolutly in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional charater Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste

If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy and past this into your profle

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile (hopefully evryone (excluding Edward/ all vamps) copies this one!)

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework insted of doing it.Crazy is when you try to make up the twilight characters signatures. Crazy is when you go on a sugar high when you haven't eaten anything sugary all day. everyone you know is thinking of committing you to an insane asylum for you addiction to the totally awesome Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer:-D OR you stay up until dawn reading fan fiction on weekends, but you made a 'curfew' for yourself at 12:30 a.m. on weekdays Crazy is when you seriously believe that you have not-so-imaginary vampire friends named Edward and Alice. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!

Yup, this is me!

Paranoid: Low

Schizoid: Moderate

Schizotypal: Moderate

Antisocial: Low

Borderline: Low

Histrionic: Moderate

Narcissistic: Low

Avoidant: High

Dependent: Moderate

Obsessive-Compulsive: High

c(")_(") this is to humor ducksrule71821 by helping bunny achieve world domination! support the bunny by copying and pasting him to your bio page.

Favorite quotes (Yes, i will add more!)

There's no i in team but there is one in pie and meat is an anagram of team so in meatpie there actually is an i in team...

A good friend bails you out of jail, a best friend is sitting on the bench next to you saying Wasn't that so much fun?"

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

Before you criticize you should walk a mile in their shoes. that way. when you criticize them you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

If your heart was really broken...you'd be dead so shut up.

Did you just call me a bitch? Well a bitch is a dog, and dogs bark, bark is on trees, trees are part of nature, nature is beautiful. So yeah, thanks for the compliment.

Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS

"Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss."

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

I accused your boyfriend of being gay and he hit me with his purse.

I don't want to rain on your parade, i just want to blow up all the floats!

"I have porn on my arm!" --Sabrina

"Orphans can't use ebay!" --me

"Argh! I keep exploding!" --Emily (we were playing a video game fotunately)

"Guess what? Ade and i got married!"--Mariah (holds up marriage certificate) "I'm leaving you for Sarah!" --Ade (tears up marriage certificate and we skip off)

Things to question

Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are
considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's
only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra
penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the
clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we
figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on
luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby"
when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still
called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?.

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being
would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool
lane ?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio
out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
fours? They're both dogs!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that
ACME stuff, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is
made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from elec trons, does morality
come from morons?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a
car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

A True Boyfriend:When she walks away from you mad
Follow her When she stare's at your mouth
Kiss her When she pushes you or hit's you
Grab her and dont let go When she start's cussing at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her When she's quiet
Ask her whats wrong When she ignore's you
Give her your attention When she pull's away
Pull her back When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful When you see her start crying
Just hold her and dont say a word When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind When she's scared
Protect her When she lay's her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her When she steal's your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a nightWhen she tease's you
Tease her back and make her laugh When she doesnt answer for a long time
reassure her that everything is okay When she look's at you with doubt
Back yourself up When she say's that she like's you
she really does more than you could understand When she grab's at your hands
Hold her's and play with her fingers When she bump's into you
bump into her back and make her laugh When she tell's you a secret
keep it safe and untold When she looks at you in your eyes
dont look away until she does When she misses you
she's hurting inside When you break her heart
the pain never really goes away When she says its over
she still wants you to be hers When she repost this bulletin
she wants you to read it - Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.- Tease her and let her tease you back.- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.- Give her the world.- Let her wear your clothes.- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.- Let her know she's important.- Kiss her in the pouring rain.- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking babe?"If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Call you.
Kiss you.
Love you.
Text you.Guys post as: "i'd be this boyfriend."
Girls post as: "A true boyfriend " or " what a boyfriend should do"

I want a guy like this more than anyone will ever know...

How Nerdy Are You?

x you wear/own a pair of glasses
x you've played some sort of video game 5 hours straight
x you have GI Joes or toy dinosaurs
x you pack your lunch to school
x reading books are fun
x sometimes you go to the library to 'hang out'
x you like eating chinese food with chopsticks
x you don't need a calculator to ... add this up.
x you get good grades
x you've corrected people's grammur =
x math class rocks!
x you've told someone a joke and nobody laughed
x you've won the ... spelling bee in elementary school
x girls/boys have cooties! EWWWWW
x you've watched t.v. for 4 hours straight
x sports are just not my thing
x you have/had a pet tarantula, snake, and/or lizard
x you cried because you got an F on something
x your homework is always turned in on time
x you're NEVER late for class
x Batman is the coolest superhero EVER!! DUUHHH
x youve corrected the teacher
x you want to be a doctor or surgeon when you grow up
x you have a napolean dynamite t-shirt
x you always have a pen or pencil for class
x you're an honor student

Multiply your score times 4 to find out how nerdy you are.

Great. I'm 72 percent nerdy.

This is a really sad poem. I didn't write it! (My name is Sarah too...)

My name is Sarah,
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen,
I cannot see.

I must be stupid,
I must be bad,
What else could have made,
My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better,
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my Mommy,
Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all,
I can't do a thing wrong,
Or else I'm locked up,
All the day long.

When I awake I'm all alone,
The house is dark,
My folks aren't home.

When my Mommy does come,
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just,
One whipping tonight.

Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car,
My daddy is back,
From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse,
My name he calls,
I press myself,
Against the wall.

I try and hide,
From his evil eyes,
I'm so afraid now,
I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping,
He shouts ugly words,
He says it's my fault,
That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me,
And yells at me more,
I finally get free,
And I run for the door.

He's already locked it,
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me,
Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor,
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues,
With more bad words spoken.

I'm sorry! I scream,
But it's now much too late,
His face has been twisted,
Into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain,
Again and again,
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops,
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless,
Sprawled out on the floor.

My name is Sarah,
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
Murdered me

25 reasons I owe my mother

1) My mother taught me to appreciate a good job done (If your going to kill each other go outside, I just cleaned up)

2) My mother taught me Religion (You better pray that comes out of the carpet)

3) My mother taught me about time travel (If you don’t straighten up, I’ll knock you into next week)

4) My mother taught me logic (Because I said so, that’s why)

5) My mother taught me more logic (If you fall out of that swing and break your neck you can’t come to the store with me)

6) My mother taught me foresight (Make sure you wear clean underwear in case your in an accident.)

7) My mother taught me irony (keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about)

8) My mother taught me about the science of osmosis (shut your mouth and eat your supper)

9) My mother taught me about the weather (that room of yours looks like a tornado went through it)

10) My mother taught me about contortionism (Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck)

11) My mother taught me about stamina (You will sit there until all that spinach is gone)

12)My mother taught me about hypocrisy (I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times, don’t exaggerate)

13) My mother taught me about the circle of life (I brought you into this world and I can take you out)

14) My mother taught me about behavior modification (stop acting like your father)

15) My mother taught me about envy (there are millions of children in the world who don’t have great parents like you do)

16) My mother taught me about anticipation (Just wait until we get home)

17) My mother taught me medical science (If you don’t stop crossing your eyes their going to freeze that way)

18) My mother taught me about receiving (Your going to get it when we get home)

19) My mother taught me about Esp (put your sweater on, don’t you think I know when your cold)

20) My mother taught me about humor (when that lawnmower cuts off your toes don’t come crying to me)

21) My mother taught me genetics (You’re just like your father)

22) My mother taught me how to grow up (If you don’t eat your vegetables you’ll never grow up)

23) My mother taught me about my roots (Shut the door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?)

24) My mother taught me about wisdom (when you get to be my age you’ll understand)

25) and my favorite: My mother taught me about justice (One day you’ll have kids and I hope they’re just like you)

MURPHY’S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS:

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright

Until you hear them speak.

2. He who laughs last thinks slowest.

3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

4. Those that live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.

5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something

Right, there’s a 90 probability you’ll get it wrong.

7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be

Stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the

Fog.

8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those who got there first.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he

Will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren’t smart enough to get out of Jury duty