Hey people. Thanks for visiting my profile. About my story, "Mistaken Events of Sam and Jake". Should it have a sequel? Please vote on my poll! Thanks so much for reading it though if you did. It's my most successful fanfic yet!
Okay, so I'll get the important stuff outta the way--
Name: Brittany
Age: 1_
Location: a rural area in the Midwestern plains
Appearence: Tall. Brownish/blond hair
Fav. Book(s): Maximum Ride, Alex Rider, Phantom Stallion, Warriors, Heartland..., basically anything I get my hands onto
Fav. Songs: 4 minutes, Bleeding Love, No Air, Take a Bow, Don't stop the music, Our Song, Picture to burn, See you again, Highway to the danger zone, That song in my head, Cleaning this gun, Back when I knew it all, Gunpowder & Lead (I'm not going to list them all)
Fav. Singers/Bands: Taylor Swift, Alan Jackson, George Strait, Dierks Bentley, Bryan Adams, Carrie Underwood Def Lepperd, Tim McGraw, Martina McBride, Rhianna (lots more)
Fav. Sports: Softball/baseball, volleyball, track, watching ML Baseball (Go Cubbies!)
Hobbies: Sports, animals, reading, WRITING
More...
I love watching baseball, and I was seriously ticked off when the American League won the All-Star. I mean; it went into what, 16 innings, and the National League actually had a chance to win once.
I also like College Basketball, and the Illini, but they use to have better players than they do now.
I have two bunnies, two cats and fish! I love animals, specially cats, and I might get more rabbits!
I have three younger sisters who are fairly cute but can be quite annoying.
How to Tell if You're a Writer
-If you talk to yourself.
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. ‘I wonder why I talk to myself so much?’)
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. ‘Okay, so have you ever noticed that the word ‘deliver’ could mean removing someone’s liver?’)
-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, ‘Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!’
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine.
-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.
-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
-If, when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.
-You get so involved with a book that you start thinking the characters are real.
-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.
-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard.
-If people think you might have A.D.D.
-If you think it’d be cool to have A.D.D.
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.
-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no ‘apparent’ reason.
-If your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.
-And finally, the number one way to tell if you’re a good writer: If you worship English 101.
Copy and Paste this if you're a writer
1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.
2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places
in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers,
large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in
America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway
and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't
miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
8.
Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages
of eight.
9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to
describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics'
meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'
.
10. Only in America...do they have
drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why are cigarettes legal at age 18 but you have to wait to drink until you're 21?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
On McDonald's coffee: "Caution: Hot"
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."
On frozen pizza: "Thaw before eating"
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands."
On Germ-X hand sanitizer: "Kills 99.99 germs." (Why doesn't it kill 100??)
~Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! :)~
If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future?
If our body temperature is normally 98.6 degrees, how come when it's 98 degrees outside, no one is comfortable?
Why is it the TWELVE days of Christmas when there is only one day of Christmas?
Since a running back runs forward, why is he called a running back?
Why is "number" abbreviated as "no"? When there is no "o" in number?
When a boy is named after his dad, he is called 'Junior,' but what do
you call a girl that is named after her mother?
If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?
364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from
strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?
Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say "do you find something funny?" When obviously we do?
Why is everything funnier when you're at church?
Why do you call jeans "a pair" if there is only one?
COPY AND PASTE THESE IF THEY APPLY TO YOU:
(the poem about Child Abuse made me cry!)--
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.
If you think Jake is the hottest/annoyingest/awesomest cowboy ever, CP this!
If you love animals, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think Jake is the hottest cowboy ever, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you are actually one of those teens who doesn't text none-stop, C&P!
Don't mess with a country gal. C&P if you are a country girl and proud of it!
Fang: 98 human, 2 Avian, 100 HOT!
If you are overly-obsessed with reading and writing, copy this and paste it to your profile.
More than half of the teenagers in the world are concerned about being popular. If you don't give a crap, copy and paste this.
If your profile is a super long and it'd take an hour to read it, Copy and paste this to make it even longer.
If you want child abuse to STOP, copy and paste this into your profile
This story is about a little girl that was abused. If you care about it, copy and paste it to your profile:
My name is Sarah I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see,
I must be stupid, I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better, I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong Or else I'm locked up All the day long
When I awake I'm all alone; The house is dark; My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come, I'll try and be nice, So maybe I'll get just one whipping tonight
Don't make a sound! I just heard a car. My daddy is back from Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse; My name he calls; I press myself against the wall.
I try and hide From his evil eyes; I'm so afraid now, I'm starting to cry.
He finds me weeping, He shouts ugly words, He says its my fault That he suffers at work.
He slaps me, and hits me, And yells at me more, I finally get free, And I run for the door.
He's already locked it, And I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor, With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream, But it's now much too late; His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain; Again and again; Oh, please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops And heads for the door, While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah And I am but three, Tonight my daddy, Murdered me.
Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!
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