Hey, Y'all!

I'm not going to bore you with a history of my life. I LOVE horses and I love to write. I'm hopelessly a romantic, so it kinda shows up in my writing. For those of you who hate romantics, don't read my stories. Deal with it.

I am from Buttholeville, Ohio (a.k.a. a semiurban rural farming community so small it takes twenty minutes to find on a map and where everyone knows everyone. Not to mention its reputed area nickname, 'Sinus Valley,' because the weather there is deplorable.)

I am currently a student at the University of Kentucky and working toward a degree in Equine Science and Management. (So, now my residence and my time is divided between Lexington, KY, and Buttholeville, OH...which one do you think I like better?)

Oh, yeah. And I'm a kickass 4-H girl. I only do horses. I already qualified for 4-H Nationals twice this year, in case you're wondering. I ride 'em, handle 'em, and read all I can lay my hands on about 'em. (Seriously, this is coming from a girl who wanted a book about horse bits for Christmas.) Most anything you'd like to know about a horse, from feed nutritional content to intestinal parasites, I'm your girl.

I adore getting reviews on my stories! I am very appreciative of every single one I get, as I don't seem to attract very many of them. I love hearing what you have to say about my writings, so please, I'm begging you, REVIEW any of my stories you've read! You've had to have read something, or else you wouldn't be reading my profile right now! It's really not going to take too much of your day. In fact, it's taking you longer to read this imploring beggar's jargon right now than it would to leave me a decent review. I can't better myself without hearing what you have to say. So please, pretty pretty please with a cherry on top, REVIEW. I PROMISE I DO NOT BITE, PEOPLE. JUST PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK OF MY WRITING. If you do, I will love you forever. Seriously. No joke.

And I don't 'do' Suefics. Suethors are my fiends, my enemies. Seriously, their so-called 'writing prowess' is quite frankly a load of horse crap. Why people think Suethors are the most amazing, witty and talented writers on this site is beyond me. Suethors are no more than squealy fangirls that need to get over themselves and their strange fantasies enough to quit posting a bunch of cliche and predictable bull on this site. The enthusiastic reviewers are no help either. The art form behind the written word is going down the tubes here, and all because of one despicable creature: the Suethor. To avid readers far and wide: beware.

A lot of my favorite characters are male leads who make fascinating multi-dimensional character studies. My stories mainly concentrate on aspects of their personality, and exploring it through narrative. (Contrary to popular writing fashions, I like to keep my canon IN CHARACTER) And though I'm enough of a cynic to know better, I'd like to believe in the purity of human characters and make it my focus in most of my writing.

And I love Smarty Jones. LOVE. I had the privilege of meeting him at Three Chimneys Farm as a present for my 18th birthday. It was the most amazing experience in my entire life. I stood about three feet away from his face. We stood there, looking each other in the eyes, for about two full minutes while the tour guide droned on about him. I never heard a word the guy said. My eyes started misting up when I first caught sight of him in his stall, and when the guy brought him out, I could feel the tears running down my cheeks. I probably looked ridiculous to the other people on the tour, but I don't really care. I couldn't help it. To see him as a living, breathing, beautiful creature instead of just a handsome horse in a picture was overwhelming. He is the awesomest horse ever and he is so sweet and strong and fast and lovey and he's beautiful, intelligent...In other words, the PERFECT horse and I LOVE HIM!! (my squealy fangirl-ness cough over a HORSE cough ends, to your overwhelming relief, here.)

Favorite Book: Gone With The Wind, hands down.

I have a few other favorites (to a lesser extent, of course). My favorite nonfictional works include Ruffian: Burning Up the Track by Jane Schwartz (first book to ever make me cry), Frank Capra's autobiography The Name Above the Title (Amazing story about a VERY great man, also very humorous and witty), Anne Frank's The Diary of a Young Girl, and James Bradley's Flags of our Fathers. In the fictional realm, there's Nerve by Dick Francis (my personal favorite of all his mystery novels), Brighton Beach Memoirs by Neil Simon, Revolutionary Road by Richard Yates, and Gamble by Felix Francis. Don't say I'm not well-read. It's not worth debating.

I am also an avid reader of Jane Austen, and I read her novels as well as those of other Austenites. Pamela Aidan (Fitzwilliam Darcy, Gentleman trilogy) and Carrie Bebris (Mr. and Mrs. Darcy Mystery series) are the best. I also read several other notable authors such as Charles Dickens and John Steinbeck. A Far Better Rest, a companion novel to A Tale of Two Cities, is another one of my favorites. I love mystery series as well, and I read lots of Dick Francis and Agatha Christe, as well as the phenomenal Maisie Dobbs series by Jacqueline Winspear.

Favorite Movie: The Secret to a Happy Ending, WAR HORSE, all Frank Capra movies, Newsies, National Velvet, International Velvet, Hidalgo, Seabiscuit, The Black Stallion, Black Beauty, Randy & The Mob, Foul Play, Chrystal, Pride & Prejudice, The Accountant, Emma, That Evening Sun, The Librarian, Gone With The Wind, Revolutionary Road, Walk the Line, all Indiana Jones films, Scaring the Fish, Glory, Blood Drips on Newsies Square, GettysburgAlong Came Polly, Meet the Parents, Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Favorite Actors: Ray McKinnon, Lisa Blount, Walton Goggins, Vivien Leigh, Clark Gable, Matthew Broderick, Max Casella, Jean Arthur, Frank Sutton, Barbara Stanwyck, Bob Denver, Jimmy Stewart, Lucille Ball, Gary Cooper, Amber Marshall, Ben Stiller, Chevy Chase

Favorite Band/Music: DRIVE-BY TRUCKERS, Jason Isbell & the 400 Unit, Lucero, Alabama Shakes, Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins, Hank Williams, Sr., Lynyrd Skynyrd, James McMurtry, Charlie Rich, Booker T. Jones, Eddie Hinton

Favorite Song: A Ghost to Most by Drive-By Truckers, Birthday Boy by Drive-By Truckers, Carl Perkins' Cadillac by Drive-By Truckers, Where the Devil Don't Stay by Drive-By Truckers, The Living Bubba by Drive-By Truckers, Cottonseed by Drive-By Truckers, Daddy's Cup by Drive-By Truckers, Sounds Better In the Song by Drive-By Truckers, Cartoon Gold by Drive-By Truckers, I Hear You Hummin' by Drive-By Truckers, Zip City by Drive-By Truckers, Women Without Whiskey by Drive-By Truckers, Marry Me by Drive-By Truckers, One of These Days by Drive-By Truckers, Buttholeville by Drive-By Truckers, Never Gonna Change by Drive-By Truckers, Outfit by Drive-By Truckers, Decoration Day by Drive-By Truckers, Hell, No, I Ain't Happy by Drive-By Truckers, When the Pin Hits the Shell by Drive-By Truckers, Everybody Needs Love by Drive-By Truckers, Where's Eddie by Drive-By Truckers, Pulaski by Drive-By Truckers, The Weakest Man by Drive-by Truckers, Goddamn Lonely Love by Drive-By Truckers, Lookout Mountain by Drive-By Truckers, Rockin' Chair by Lisa Blount, Sinkhole by Drive-By Truckers, Panties In Your Purse by Drive-By Truckers

Favorite Music Video: Used to Be a Cop by Drive-By Truckers, Never Gonna Change by Drive-By Truckers, Working This Job by Drive-By Truckers (this one stars the wonderful Ray McKinnon)

Favorite Horse: Thoroughbred! (Any horse racing fans out there?)

Favorite TV Show: Bonanza, Survivor, The Amazing Race, Big Brother, I Love Lucy, Happy Days, Gilligan's Island, The Adventures of The Black Stallion, Gomer Pyle U.S.M.C., Liberty's Kids, Heartland, I Dream of Jeannie, Perfect Strangers, Family Matters, Roundhouse, Good Eats, Who Do You Think You Are?, Poirot, Ghost Adventures, The Andy Griffith Show, Doogie Howser M.D.

Role Models: My Grandmother, Scarlett O'Hara, Frank Capra, Rachel Rowe

Favorite Quotes:

Evidently what rings true in one heart will toll the same bell all over the world. ~ Frank Capra

The tops of the mountains belong to God and He don't want His wild things disturbed. ~ Unknown

If a man builds a machine, and that machine conspires with another machine built by another man, are those men conspiring? ~ The Accountant, The Accountant

The more you toot, the better you feel, so eat some beans with every meal. ~ Mrs. Hutsell

The basic rule...was simple and heartbreaking. A story to be effective had to convey something from writer to reader, and the power of its offering was the measure of its excellence. Outside of that...there were no rules. ~ John Steinbeck

I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal. ~ Jane Austen, letter to Cassandra

How very little trouble it can give you to understand the motive of other people's actions. ~ Henry Tilney, Northanger Abbey

If I were them, I'd collect monies owed, then come back and kill everybody later...for a variety of reasons. ~ Charlotte Pearson, Randy & The Mob

I came here with the determined resolution of carrying my purpose; nor will I be dissuaded from it. ~ Lady Catherine de Bourgh, Pride & Prejudice

I believe animals are man's superior. Man is the only thing where supply exceeds the demand. How can he justify his existance? ~ Lucius Beebe

It's do-able but it ain't gonna be purdy. ~ The Accountant, The Accountant

Where's my fuggin' chair?! ~ Max Casella, Blood Drips on Newsies Square

Nobody hurts my horse. ~ Frank Hopkins, Hidalgo

Torture is the unforgivable sin. ~ Unknown

(Answer) Number two is A as in Dog. ~ Mrs. Hutsell

Pictures of perfection, as you know, make me sick and wicked. ~ Jane Austen, letter to Fanny Knight

The formula seems to lie solely in the aching urge of the writer to convey something he feels important to the reader. If the writer has that urge, he may sometimes but by no means always find the way to do it. ~ John Steinbeck

There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. ~ Elizabeth to Darcy, Pride & Prejudice

But I will not torment myself with conjectures and suppositions; facts shall satisfy me. ~ Jane Austen, letter to Cassandra

My good opinion once lost is lost forever. ~ Darcy to Elizabeth, Pride & Prejudice

I want it all so fast, so God won't stop and think and wonder if I've had more than my share. ~ Velvet Brown, National Velvet

Character; it's the only thing you can bank on and it's the only thing that'll pull this country out of the doldrums. ~ Thomas Dickson, American Madness

There is, I believe, in every disposition a tendency to some particular evil, a natural defect, which not even the best education can overcome. ~ Darcy to Elizabeth, Pride & Prejudice

...I've got a piece to speak, and blow hot or cold, I'm going to speak it. ~ Jefferson Smith, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington

I may be many things that are despicable, but I am not a coward. ~ Tino Armani, Randy & The Mob

I am convinced that there is a vast deal of inconsistency in almost every human character. ~ John Dashwood to Elinor, Sense & Sensibility

Disguise of every sort is my abhorrence. ~ Darcy to Elizabeth, Pride & Prejudice

Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around, he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he? ~ Clarence Oddbody, It's a Wonderful Life

The imaginations of other people will carry them away to form wrong judgements of our conduct, and to decide on it by slight appearances. ~ Sense & Sensibility

He can't trust his own reality; he don't know what it is no more. He starts ACTIN' COUNTRY instead of BEIN' COUNTRY! ~ The Accountant, The Accountant

After all, tomorrow is another day! ~ Scarlett O'Hara, Gone With the Wind

I will go so far as to say that the writer who is not scared is happily unaware of the remote and tantalizing majesty of the medium. ~ John Steinbeck

As he required the promise, I could not do less than give it. ~ John Dashwood to Fanny Dashwood, Sense & Sensibility

The import of kudzu was short-sighted. ~ Tino Armani, Randy & The Mob

Friend, you are a divine mingle-mangle of guts and stardust. So hang in there! If doors opened for me, they can open for anyone. ~ Frank Capra

Think only on the past as its remembrance gives you pleasure. ~ Elizabeth to Darcy, Pride & Prejudice