I figured maybe I should say something here... huh?

So haythar. Right.

My name is Sizheng, sorta, but I'm not so secretive about my day-to-day name. It just seems kinda odd to stick it on a supposedly anonymous writing profile, so you'll have to make do with my Cantonese name translated into Mandarin, then romanised.

...mad? I know, isn't it brill? Capital, I knew you'd think so.

I live in Vancouver, BC--that's in Canada, for all the chaps and chappesses who are like me and fail at political geography. I like rocks, not borders. Trees don't change just because one particular type grows over the border in the United States of 'Merica and not in Our Frozen Popsicle Land (which is, by the way, a myth).

Digressing. Maybe I should just stick one of them Name/Age/Location ones... yeah. I think I'll do that. It'd at least put a stop to the monologuing, wouldn't it? Wouldn't it?

No, I didn't think so either.

Name: Zhang Sizheng

Age: Young enough not to know anything, but old enough to know she doesn't know anything.

Sex: Uhm. (points at the agecaption) I'm female. I've got some of my friends I convinced that I used to be male, but I'm female, last I went to the loo. Have been female since my mother's womb, even. Ask her if you don't believe me. :D

Location: Vancouver, BC. Pacific Time Zone (-8:00)

Occupation: Second year of BA at the U of BC. Wow, I'm practically spilling my location to you, aren't I? I'm stupid and trusting and very very stupid. But that's okay. People like me are what Mums around the world need as a not-so-shining example: "you shouldn't make friends with strangers, because then you'll find yourself hacked to pieces in a ditch of some kind".

Aaaaand, the following, in no particular order...

Likes: Her wives, her husbands, cracking racist jokes, anime, manga, her family, friends, rock climbing, Hatake Kakashi, lilies-of-the-valley (how do you pluralise them, anyhow?), fanfiction, well-written crossovers (thought I oughta emphasise the "well-written" part), her unofficial adopted family, skiing, Kaiba Seto, lemonade, needlework, embroidery, Star Wars, Darth Vader (Star Wars because of Darth Vader, just about!), Disney (sorta. They kinda screw things over with the happily-ever-after thing), Disney songs, musicals, grubbing around in the dirt, judo, poetry, books, fantasy, cats, Cats: the Musical (in your face, Ryanbunny), flowers, mountain-climbing, gay men... writing lists. Because this is solely for my benefit. It's not like I expect people to read through this crap.

Dislikes: People who turn their backs on friends, teenagers, fake wood (how are you possibly supposed to knock on wood if the shite's fake?), IKEA by default (I don't care how useful they are or the fact that I shop there--all there stuff's made of faux-wood!), violence, homophobia, people who call anime "cartoons", penises (I don't hold much affection for things that look like someone chopped a worm in half and turned it inside out), racism (in earnest), discrimination, people who think World Peace is plausible, meaningless conflict, hairy men, body hair in general (I don't have to shave and you didn't need to know that, but now you're jealous 'cause I'm made of win. Hah! ...ah, well. It's not like anyone reads these things, anyway).

Things That Fascinate Me Against My Will: Profiles. Sex organs (floral or otherwise). The strange squeaking noise my brother's kitten makes when I poke her or squeeze her. Frying oatmeal. Facial stubble (yuck. It's sorta fun to rub your face all over it, tho the burn afterwards is... less enjoyable. My roommate has been surprisingly tolerant of my wandering up to him and just smearing my face against his. What can I say? he doesn't like it, he can damn well do a better job shaving). E-cards. Young photos of old people. Religion. Standing on my head and waiting to see if I pass out if I'm upside-down long enough.

Endeth generic profile. Awaken, o flock of fickshunchickuns, that we might have ficcage!

...I am such a freak.

I guess I should point out that my homepage (livejournal) has a number of fics and fragments that I haven't posted here. They're all public, however, so you needn't an account, or to have friended me to see them. But friends are nice! So... hallo. Let us be friends! (Hides the jackhammer and thumbscrews behind her back).

Disclaimer: I don’t own the anime Naruto. ’Else some bad things that aren’t at all Naruto-like would be in there… and all homophobes watching it would be forever scarred. Heh.

Note: Disclaimer to be constant throughout all chapters and stories.