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Author has written 24 stories for Discworld, Lord of the Rings, Pride and Prejudice, and Emma. Hi, I'm Virtuella - well, not really, but it's a cool internet name, you must admit. I am a middle-aged special needs teacher, born and raised in Germany, but transported to Scotland by the lures of Very Attractive Scotsman Who Was Brave Enough To Marry Me. I have two children aged five and four, theological, political and feminist Views, and a permanent crush on Lord Vetinari. My favourite haunts on ffn are the Discworld and LOTR fandoms. Those who share my soft spot for His Lordship might enjoy the collection of Vetinari stories in my C2 The Vetinari Files. If you crave Vetimance, try A Winter's Tale, it is really rather good, though I say so myself. ;-) There are two sequels to it, The Vetissey and The Return of the...?, which is in the process of being posted. A sequel to The Measure of a Man is also under way and is being posted under the title Truth Be Told. I have created another C2 called Young Talent in which I showcase quality stories by authors under eighteen. English is not my native language, and though I make an effort to get it right, some errors may remain. Most of my stories are proofread by my husband, and some have had the advantage of a good beta. If you notice something we have overlooked, please let me know. I virtually always reply to reviews, so if you haven't had a review reply from me, the system has probably eaten it. I'm not a great artist, but here are some scribbles that didn't turn out too bad: Characters from The Measure Of A Man: http://www.saltzenmund.co.uk/measure.jpg Angelina from A Winter's Tale: http://www.saltzenmund.co.uk/Angelina.jpg However, a much, much better rendition of Angelina has been created by DarkTari and can be seen here: http://darktari.deviantart.com/art/Angelina-Winter-121873883 . Thanks so very much, DarkTari! The following of my stories have been nominated for MEFA 2009: The Measure Of A Man Eight Elven Cloaks Mrs Maggot Gives Directions Worse Than The Witch King The Gift Of Iluvatar (In: Pebbles From Arda) Taking Stock (In: Pebbles From Arda) Tidings Of Doom And Gloom (In: Pebbles From Arda) I am pleased that some of my stories have also been listed on Archives of Excellence: http://archives-of-excellence.9f.com/ You might want to check out this interesting resource. | |||||||||||
1. Truth Be Told » reviewsDéoric, the newly appointed Chronicler of the Mark, is faced with new challenges. When he finds that not all is truth that the Eorlingas hold to be true, will his break with Éomer end his career? Sequel to Measure Of A Man, but prior reading not required.Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - General/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 35,369 - Reviews: 45 - Updated: 11-21-09 - Published: 7-22-09 - Eomer & Eowyn2. The Return of the ? » reviewsThe Vetinaris are back in Ankh-Morpork and Havelock wants his chair back, but Downey is stubbornly sitting on it. Will one of them kill the other? Will Angelina get to eat figgins? And what other calamities will befall? Sequel to The VetisseyDiscworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 55,800 - Reviews: 73 - Updated: 11-17-09 - Published: 6-5-09 - Vetinari & Sam Vimes3. A Strange Case Of Magical Inheritance reviewsFifteen years onwards, Magrat is still the butt of the joke - or so it seems.Discworld - Rated: K - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,139 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 11-16-09 - Magrat & Verence II - Complete4. First Glimpse reviewsMr Knightley has a surprise in store for his wife.Emma - Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,680 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 10-24-09 - Complete5. Ladies’ Guide To Middleearth’s Eligible Bachelors reviewsDoes exactly what it says on the tin.Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,443 - Reviews: 18 - Published: 9-12-09 - Aragorn - Complete6. Pebbles From Arda » reviewsA collection of shorter stories. Chapter 1: Arwen reflects on the fate of the elves. Chapter 2: Before setting out from Rivendell, Gandalf is taking stock. Chapter 3: A rather silly poem. Chapter 4: When Éomer meets Lothíriel, he is in for a surprise.Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,629 - Reviews: 27 - Updated: 7-21-09 - Published: 7-6-08 - Eomer & Lothíriel7. Worse Than The Witch King » reviewsThere are certain old customs in Gondor of which Éowyn cannot approve. Unfortunately, one of them concerns her wedding...Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 8,958 - Reviews: 58 - Updated: 7-1-09 - Published: 6-22-09 - Eowyn & Faramir - Complete8. Three Servants » reviewsOn the day she departs from Lambton, three servants indulge in musings about Elizabeth Bennet.Pride and Prejudice - Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,542 - Reviews: 10 - Updated: 4-14-09 - Published: 4-5-09 - Complete9. The Measure Of A Man » reviewsDéoric has lost a leg and his best friend on the Pelennor. He is set to lose even more after his return home, but Éomer discovers the young man's unusual talent. A coming-of-age story, OC centred, but Éomer and Éowyn play substantial roles.Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - General/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 49,886 - Reviews: 127 - Updated: 1-7-09 - Published: 10-15-08 - Eomer & Eowyn - Complete10. The Vetissey » reviewsThrough the petty revenge of a jilted opera singer, Lord Vetinari and his new wife find themselves lost at sea. It looks fishy, and Vimes decides to find out the truth. Sequel to A Winter’s Tale, set post-MM.Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 16 - Words: 62,144 - Reviews: 140 - Updated: 1-6-09 - Published: 8-6-08 - Vetinari & Sam Vimes - Complete11. Lydia Gets Lost reviewsA wandering shop drops Lydia Bennet into Ankh-Morpork, where she encounters - gasp! - a man in uniform. Jane Austen/Discworld crossover, written for Rowena de Vandals 1000 Words Or Less Challenge.Crossover - Discworld & Pride and Prejudice - Rated: K - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,095 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 12-9-08 - Complete12. Lines reviewsA lady discovers an unwelcome change in her mirror image. Who she is and what else distresses her is for the reader to find out.Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,241 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 9-23-08 - Complete13. A Week In The Life Of A Simian Bibliophile reviewsL-Space: The final frontier. These are the adventures of the individual formerly called Dr Horace Worblehat, now simply known as The Librarian. He's lost something and needs to get it back. Written for the Fireplace Writing Challenge "Credible Crossovers"Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,404 - Reviews: 15 - Published: 9-14-08 - The Librarian - Complete14. Eight Elven Cloaks » reviewsGaladriel has a special assignment for her maidens. As eight elven cloaks are made in a bower in Calas Galadhon, the maidens reflect on each member of the fellowship in turn and decide on a blessing for each cloak. Winner in its category at 2008 MC AwardsLord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - General/Spiritual - Chapters: 10 - Words: 6,372 - Reviews: 96 - Updated: 9-9-08 - Published: 8-12-08 - Galadriel - Complete15. Falling Off Roundworld reviewsAfter a lengthy session on the lavatory, Rincewind returns to his desk and finds himself confronted with a corpse. Written for Rowena DeVandal's One Thousand Words Or Less Challenge.Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,555 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 7-10-08 - Rincewind & Mustrum Ridcully - Complete16. Elevator Malfunction reviewsA bout of silliness prompted me to dream up my own idiosyncratic self-insert drop-in story. You may find it moderately amusing. Fangirls: It's got Legolas in it! Flamers: Please flame, it's got a Mary Sue!Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,482 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 6-30-08 - Gandalf & Aragorn - Complete17. Mrs Maggot Gives Directions reviewsFrom the very start, Frodo's quest stood on the edge of a knife. He might have never made it to Bucklebury Ferry, had it not been for the quick thinking of a farmer's wife. A glimpse into one ordinary hobbit's life and the appearance of the shadow in it.Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,227 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 6-29-08 - Complete18. Dwarf Fashions » reviewsJust a bit of fun: Ioreth and her country-bumpkin cousin have a peculiar encounter of the Pratchettian kind in the streets of Minas Tirith.Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,108 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 6-23-08 - Complete19. Angua Loses It reviewsMoonlight, a random discharge of magic and a little switch. Written for Rowena DeVandal's One Thousand Words Or Less Challenge.Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,092 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 6-10-08 - Angua - Complete20. Tales of Promise » reviewsThe end of the war has opened up new prospects for many. A counterpart to The Unsung Sorrow. 2008 MEFA 2nd place in combination with The Unsung SorrowLord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,654 - Reviews: 22 - Updated: 6-7-08 - Published: 5-29-08 - Complete21. Verity Pushpram's Diary reviewsA Nobbymance. Need I say more?Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,609 - Reviews: 14 - Published: 6-6-08 - Verity P. & Nobby N. - Complete22. The Unsung Sorrow » reviewsThe War of the Ring is over, but all is not well. A look at the losses of the unnamed and unknown. 2008 MEFA 2nd place in combination with Tales of PromiseLord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,560 - Reviews: 23 - Updated: 5-23-08 - Published: 5-16-08 - Complete23. A Winter's Tale » reviewsPride & Petri dishes! It is a case of Pterry-meets-Jane-Austen when a genteel but naive alchemist comes to Ankh-Morpork and Vetinari discovers his Darcy side. Canon compatible up to Making Money.Discworld - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 43,240 - Reviews: 50 - Updated: 5-5-08 - Published: 2-27-08 - Vetinari & Drumknott - Complete24. A Surprise For Mr Boot reviewsJust a bit of fun, inspired by a footnote. How did Denephew Boot get his name?Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 880 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4-8-08 - Complete
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