Poll: In my story 'Max, Meet Your Sexist Self', do you think that female Max should get together with male Max, or Fang? Vote Now!
Author has written 4 stories for Maximum Ride, and Gemma Doyle Trilogy.
I have been so into and so out of this site lately...but I'm back in. I think. I really hope. I really, really hope because I like writing and I really enjoy having my stuff read and knowing that people like it. It's always great to hear things like that. And it's summer break and I'm free and my computer should be back up and running again soon (I'm on my sister's right now) and life should be pretty awesome. I hope.
Humor I have found:
This is my friendship w/ a few of my friends. I will not name them, but they know who they are.
1. When you are sad, I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard.
2. When you are blue, I will try and dislodge whatever is in your throat.
3. When you smile, I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.
4 When you are scared, I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could get until you stop whining.
6. When you are confused, I will use little words.
7. When you are sick, stay the heck away from me. I don't want whatever you've got. Jk (sort of).
8. When you fall, I will ask if you're okay, sit there and laugh at your clumsy butt.
This oath I pledge until the end. "Why?" you may ask. Because you are my friend. Friendship is like peeing in your pants. Other people can see it. But only you can truly feel it's warmth.
THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I EVER READ (see below, mind the language):
"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating student as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole."
Copy THIS onto Your Profile Stuff...
If you think George W. Bush is a complete idiot, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you/your parents did not vote for Bush, copy and paste this onto your profile.
IF YOU’VE BEEN ON THE COMPUTER FOR HOURS ON END, READING NUMEROUS FANFICTIONS, COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE.
If you're a fast runner...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writitng or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy this and paste it in your profile.
92 percent of American teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch/American Eagle told them it was uncool to breathe. If you are one of the 8 percent who would stand there and laugh, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever randomly fallen out of your chair, copy this into your profile
If you've ever pushed on a door that said pull (or Vice Versa) copy this into your profile
If you've ever gone into a laughing fit for no reason, copy this onto your profile
If you are obsessed w/ Fanfiction, then copy this into your profile
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which makes weird good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy & paste this onto your profile
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile
Ninety-Five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmuisc, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minamoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy the Mary-Sue Slayer, Harry's Girl 01031992, Dawn over the Valley, Captain Samantha Lovegood, LilyGinnyBlack, Lilyre, Hermione16, iLoVeMoOnYnPaDfOot, Someone aka Me,Yourcool79, Give up your Prejudices, MyNameIsCAB, Shatchi
Boys say that in everything they do, they can kick a girl's butt so bad that they cry. If you're a girl who kicks the boys' butts so bad they cry like girls, copy this into your profile and add your name. Moonstar of FireClan, Flamestar, Samishi Destiny, Silverstar's Shadow, Darkangel24700, iLoVeMoOnYnPaDfOoT, Someone aka Me,Yourcool79, Give up your Prejudices, MyNameIsCAB, Shatchi
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile.
If, for any particular reason, you have laughed during a movie that wasn't funny, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, danceswithwings119, gottaluvtwilight,freexflyer, Green.Winged.Mistress, MoonStarWithWings, Yourcool79, MyNameIsCAB, Shatchi
IF YOU'VE EVER LEAPED DOWN THE HALLWAY OF A HOTEL AND TURNED THE CORNER AND SAW PEOPLE STARING AT YOU COPY AND PASTE THIS IN YOUR PROFILE
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
if you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile.
If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination or something to that effect, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile
If you love Max Ride and cannot live without it, post this in your profile.
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, And you do so at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile
If you think Max and Fang should get together now copy and paste this into your profile.
If you relate everything to Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you still laugh rereading Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you wish that you could fly so much it hurts, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you absolutely KILLED yourself laughing when gazzy said "'I vill now destroy de Snickurs bahrs!' then copy this to your profile!
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs cpoy and psate it in yuor pofrile
If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites, copy this in your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile
If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.
If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you don't mind pervs as friends, copy and paste this into your profile
If you hate it when people label you, copy this into your profile
If you have ever insulted someone so stupid that they didn't get the insult, copy this into your profile
If you have ever wondered what the afterlife is like, copy this into your profile
If you love reading, copy this into your profile
If you love to reminisce about the past, copy this into your profile
If you love the whole blind, pyro, mutant, baker thing about Iggy, post this in your profile.
If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
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