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Author has written 72 stories for Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, House, M.D., Jaws, Good Omens, Misc. Books, Tom Stoppard, and Metalocalypse. Now in college graduate flavor, with a full-time job that has nothing whatsoever to do with anything I studied. My main fandom right now is Metalocalypse. I often write slash -- generally Nathan/Charles and Skwisgaar/Toki, but I'm pretty flexible about pairings. A lot of what I write, though, tends to be gen with subtext, or slash-if-you-squint, and should be labeled accordingly. (See below re. labels.) Every once in a while I might write some Ros & Guil Are Dead, Good Omens, or Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. The latter is particularly close to my heart because it helped me through a tough time and I still keep a towel in my bag everywhere I go. That's... about it. For the record, I try to label all my fics pretty well. If there's slash in it, the Warning label at the top of the story says "slash". If there is a metric ton of subtext per paragraph, the Warning label at the top of the story says "slash-if-you-squint". That second one means that you can read it as gen if you want, or you can choose to read it as slash. So please, don't review a fic clearly labeled as slash to say that you really like it... except for the slash. That's like saying you really like chocolate chip cookies except for the chocolate chips. If it's a story labeled slash-if-you-squint, keep in mind that I intended it to be read either way... and if you want to suggest that it should actually be labeled as slash instead, if you're not a jerk about it I would be happy to consider changing the label. :) I take requests that come with prompts, though I make no promises that I'll manage to write something for them. (Motivation has been a problem, recently.) Metalocalypse, Ros & Guil, Hitchhikers, and maybe Jaws. | |||||||
1. Sleepwalking » reviewsNathan did it knowing that if Charles told him to stop, he would. Warning: contains slash.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 20 - Words: 7,655 - Reviews: 9 - Updated: 12-3-10 - Published: 3-3-10 - Nathan E. & C. F. Ofdensen2. Drabble Collection » reviewsA series of Metalocalypse drabbles. Lots of slash or slash-if-you-squint, mostly either Nathan and Charles or Skwisgaar and Toki right now. Each drabble is stand-alone.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 7,546 - Reviews: 15 - Updated: 10-8-10 - Published: 3-28-103. BarrelsBarrels. That's interesting. Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead.Tom Stoppard - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 471 - Published: 10-1-10 - Complete4. Beds reviewsInspired by the book's comments that, first, the beds plural in Crowley's flat are always made, and that, second, there is one and only one bedroom.Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 518 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9-30-10 - A. Crowley & Aziraphale - Complete5. Giraffe reviewsThis is a hypothetical scenario in which Toki has just come out of the closet, it's seriously fucking up the band, and due to attempted therapy Skwisgaar accidentally him into a miniature giraffe.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,890 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 9-25-10 - Skwisgaar S. & Toki W. - Complete6. Blue Sheets reviewsSkwisgaar needs to go to bed. Toki helps.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,178 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 9-23-10 - Skwisgaar S. & Toki W. - Complete7. Finds Me A Fathers reviewsSkwisgaar decides he doesn't want to be the only guy in the band who never had a father. Set during Dethdad.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,127 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 9-21-10 - Skwisgaar S. & C. F. Ofdensen - Complete8. Hilo Is Not Brutal reviewsAn anti-honeymoon seemed like a good idea at the time…Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,554 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 9-19-10 - Nathan E. & C. F. Ofdensen9. Lessons reviewsSkwisgaar shows Toki the fingering, and is pretty sure the younger guitarist is watching with rapt attention. Slash. Do not expect the hot water in your shower to last this long at home.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,100 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 7-21-10 - Skwisgaar S. & Toki W. - Complete10. Hard » reviewsIt started with silliness and cupcakes. Drabble-length chapters, Skwisgaar/Toki slash later on.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,057 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 7-1-10 - Published: 6-28-10 - Toki W. & Skwisgaar S.11. What Happens in Vegas Stays With Your Lawyer » reviewsActually, there are three things to do in Vegas: get drunk, gamble, and be married by Elvis. Contains slash.Metalocalypse - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,141 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6-10-10 - C. F. Ofdensen & Skwisgaar S.12. Rooftop reviewsCharles is back. Nathan doesn't know what to make of this.Metalocalypse - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,593 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5-17-10 - Nathan E. & C. F. Ofdensen - Complete13. Night in the Dethbus reviewsIt's the night after the attack on Mordhaus, and no one really wants to be alone.Metalocalypse - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,706 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 5-16-10 - Toki W. & Skwisgaar S. - Complete14. Thanks For All the Love reviewsFord returns to Earth to find Arthur in love with Fenchurch.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,452 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5-14-10 - Complete15. It's Too Dark for I See reviewsArthur is sure. Or is he? Warning, contains Ford/Arthur slash.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,369 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 4-2-10 - Complete16. Behind Schedule » reviewsWhat if Charles hadn't been able to get there in time to keep the renegotiated contract from being signed? Some N/C, but if you don't like slash you can still read part one.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,177 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 4-2-10 - C. F. Ofdensen17. He Came Back reviewsCharles needs Nathan to do this for him. Slash. Dark.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 405 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 3-28-10 - Nathan E. & C. F. Ofdensen18. Guitar Beer Fest reviewsCharles' POV. Hints of slash.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 916 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 3-28-10 - C. F. Ofdensen & Nathan E.19. Midnight Show » reviewsFord had finally invited Arthur to come and see a play. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,964 - Reviews: 10 - Updated: 3-25-10 - Published: 5-17-0820. Don't Hang Up reviewsDethklok had discovered Skype. Slash-if-you-squint.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,013 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 3-3-10 - C. F. Ofdensen & Nathan E. - Complete21. Good Idea, Bad Idea » reviewsIt seemed like a good idea at the time. Nathan/SethMetalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,069 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 3-2-10 - Published: 2-12-1022. After Charles reviewsNathan nearly *killed* the guy who finally told them. Spoilers for end of season two/beginning of season three, sort of. Slash-if-you-squint.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 435 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 2-2-10 - Complete23. One, Two, Three, Exactly One Hundred, Floored reviewsAs far as Nathan was concerned, it was only a stupid bet if he lost. Losing hadn't actually been on his to-do list.Metalocalypse - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 906 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2-2-10 - Nathan E. & Toki W.24. Can't Stop The Madness reviewsWhat Toki's daughter wants, Toki's daughter gets. One OC and vaguely mentioned slash pairings.Metalocalypse - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 740 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 1-18-10 - Complete25. Christmas reviewsNathan's first babysitter.Metalocalypse - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,743 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 1-1-10 - Nathan E. & C. F. Ofdensen26. A Solid Gold Telephone » reviewsEventually they'll figure out that there is such thing as too much, but they're not going to admit that until they absolutely have to. S/T slash.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,377 - Reviews: 5 - Updated: 10-29-09 - Published: 9-29-09 - Skwisgaar S. & Toki W.27. Toki's Worst Fear reviewsEven Skwisgaar has noticed by now that terrible things happen to everyone Toki loves. Contains implied S/T slash.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 391 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 10-20-09 - Skwisgaar S. - Complete28. Pigsty reviewsRosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead, the teenage years. Being of so young days brought up with him, they probably wouldn't be surprised that Wittenberg needs better locks to keep Hamlet from wandering around at night.Tom Stoppard - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 499 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 9-16-09 - Complete29. PawnsPlaying chess to pass the time. Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead. Drabble.Tom Stoppard - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 156 - Published: 9-16-09 - Complete30. HickeyThe title should tell you plenty. Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead. Slash.Tom Stoppard - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,062 - Published: 9-16-09 - Complete31. Name That SnakeklokThe internet had assured Toki that a good trouser snake would earn him respect. So he got a pet snake what lives in his pants, and now it needs a name. PART OF A SERIES, please read the author notes first or confusion will ensue.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,729 - Published: 9-14-09 - Complete32. OkaySometimes, when the band is away, Charles finds himself in the need of a Nathan substitute. Warning for... sleepy cuddling, I guess.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,190 - Published: 9-14-09 - C. F. Ofdensen - Complete33. You Make Bathtime Oh So Fun reviewsRos & Guil Are Dead. Rosencrantz's best friend besides Guildenstern is a rubber duck.Tom Stoppard - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 698 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 7-20-09 - Complete34. The Endless Time of Always Coming Back reviewsRos & Guil Are Dead. Written for the prompt of, "You promised!"Tom Stoppard - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 683 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 7-20-09 - Complete35. This One Time, At Band Camp reviewsA drum and bugle corps has formed in Dethklok's honor, but the boys still have yet to decide if it's brutal enough to perform their songs. Ofdensen has arranged for a special rehearsal at Mordland - so let the marching begin.Metalocalypse - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,998 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 7-12-0936. Accident reviewsHooper had an accident...Jaws - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 673 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6-26-09 - Complete37. Liquor Monkey reviewsIf you'll pardon the pun. Contains Ford/Arthur slash.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,381 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 6-26-09 - Complete38. Take Me Home reviewsThe only things keeping the Bentley on the road were a string of increasingly desperate miracles and sheer force of will. Slight hurt/comfort.Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,433 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 6-14-09 - Aziraphale & A. Crowley - Complete39. Bad Apples reviewsFamine and Pollution receive a housewarming present.Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 350 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6-14-09 - Famine & Pollution - Complete40. PIRATES! reviewsRosencrantz & Guildenstern are stuck in a barrel. Lightly slashy.Tom Stoppard - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,717 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6-14-09 - Complete41. Lemon Curry reviewsStealing Wilson's lunches was one thing. Coming home and stealing bites of his dinner was... well, technically another, but it was still the same basic idea.House, M.D. - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 629 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3-16-09 - G. House & J. Wilson - Complete42. Houses of Cards, Flat on the Table reviewsCrowley and Aziraphale are both somewhat at loose ends after the Apocaly-oops-nevermind. C/AGood Omens - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,237 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 3-13-09 - A. Crowley & Aziraphale43. Believe Them reviewsIn which Wilson watches a chick flick and House interrupts.House, M.D. - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 703 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 3-7-09 - J. Wilson & G. House - Complete44. Gifts reviewsIn the end, surprisingly, no one made much of a fuss. C/AGood Omens - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 751 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 3-6-09 - A. Crowley & Aziraphale - Complete45. Whether reviewsShort story based on Sherman Alexie's "The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian". No pairing.Misc. Books - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 948 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2-24-09 - Complete46. Even If reviewsThere's really only one thing that makes falling in love with an angel a terrible idea. Crowley/AziraphaleGood Omens - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 375 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 2-20-09 - A. Crowley & Aziraphale - Complete47. Big Bang reviewsHooper has decided, and not even Brody will be able to talk him out of it. Hooper/Brody PWP.Jaws - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,311 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 2-13-09 - Complete48. I'll Keep You » reviewsWith the shark gone, Hooper has no real reason to stay on the island. But he doesn't exactly want to leave, either. Brody/Hooper.Jaws - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 12,056 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 2-2-09 - Complete49. Sweet reviewsArthur Dent's horoscope: "A friend will do something sweet for you soon. Get excited! It will knock your socks off. Things will turn out very differently than you thought they would, but it will be good for you in the long run."Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 530 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 1-29-09 - Complete50. Sometime Around Midnight reviewsThis is not based on the song of the same name. Much. But it IS Ford/Arthur pwp.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,711 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 1-28-09 - Complete51. They Waited For the Shark reviewsThree guys on a boat. A brief deleted scene from aboard the Orca.Jaws - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,424 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 1-13-09 - Complete52. Zen & the Art » reviewsSet shortly after Arthur Dent's spectacular failure to order a green salad. This, of course, is impossible. Ford/Arthur, TV-verseHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 42 - Words: 30,759 - Reviews: 93 - Updated: 1-6-09 - Published: 5-24-08 - Complete53. Disquiet reviewsThere are accidents in every relationship. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,002 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 11-27-08 - Complete54. Chisholm's Third » reviewsProposals, as understood by the proposer, will be judged otherwise by others. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 17,602 - Reviews: 18 - Updated: 11-22-08 - Published: 11-10-08 - Complete55. First Time » reviewsA drabble arc of Ford/Arthur firsts. Slash, mostly fluff.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,548 - Reviews: 8 - Updated: 10-30-08 - Published: 10-26-08 - Complete56. Visitation reviewsThis is kind of ridiculous. Spoilers for episodes 1 and 2 of season 5.House, M.D. - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,363 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 9-28-08 - J. Wilson - Complete57. London Dairy Rum » reviewsArthur had just woken up, and without even opening his eyes he was already very disconcerted. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 7,824 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 9-12-08 - Published: 9-1-08 - Complete58. Won’t Make It Through the High Noon Sun reviewsLike what happened in a room on the Vogon constructor ship, only not. Unrequited Ford/Arthur.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 550 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8-19-08 - Complete59. Striped reviewsRated for suggestive mental typos and hands where they shouldn't be. This is very silly. Ford/Arthur.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 530 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8-18-08 - Complete60. See the World reviewsIt's just now some time well after four in the afternoon and Arthur Dent is already smashed, in two very distinct ways. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 907 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8-1-08 - Complete61. Loud & Clear reviewsWilson feels the need to mark his territory. Chase wishes he wouldn't. Spoilers for 3-15 Half-Wit. House/WilsonHouse, M.D. - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 724 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 7-23-08 - R. Chase & J. Wilson - Complete62. A Toast reviewsIncludes two cons, three different kinds of alcohol, Ford in a sink, and one very simple answer. Oh, and lots of fooling around. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,126 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 7-18-08 - Complete63. The Arthur Dent Guide to Seduction reviewsFord has stolen Arthur's dressing gown. Arthur retaliates.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,208 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 7-1-08 - Complete64. Mr Sneakypants reviewsThis is silly.Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 440 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6-30-08 - Complete65. Miserable Weather reviewsFord doesn't like being stuck on Earth. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,147 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 5-18-08 - Complete66. Yellow » reviewsLooking at the stars. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,026 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 5-16-08 - Published: 5-15-08 - Complete67. Let It Be reviewsAnd in my hour of darkness he is standing right in front of me... Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 500 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5-14-08 - Complete68. Nowhere Man reviewsHe's a real nowhere man, sitting in his nowhere land... Nowhere Man, can you see me at all? Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 565 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5-14-08 - Complete69. The Hitchhiker's Guide to Titles reviewsThis is a silly title. But then they all are, so, really, why complain? This is the same kind of logic that drives the plot. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,038 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 5-12-0870. Not So Subtle reviewsIn which Ford does something uncalled for, Arthur stops the car very suddenly, and a New Year's resolution is made. Set before the Earth was destroyed. Ford/ArthurHitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 831 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 5-12-08 - Complete71. Five Ways Wilson Could Have Reacted reviewsEverything House does is based on other peoples' reactions. Why would that be any less true when he's around Wilson? House/WilsonHouse, M.D. - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,299 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 5-8-08 - G. House & J. Wilson - Complete
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