My Other Sites:

BiblioFaction

FictionPress

MaxRide UK

Name: Lauren Elizabeth 'Beth'

Age: 17! (Did you know I hadn't updated my age on here in THREE YEARS!!)

Sex: Not yet ... haha! Nah, I'm a female!

Hobbies: Reading and Writing, duh!

Recent Projects:

Be Careful What You Wish For - Max Ride One Shot. (Complete!)

What Should Have Happened - Max Ride Novel (Chapter eight up!)

How Do You Really Feel? - Max Ride Novel. (Complete) - Sequel Has Been Deleted =(

27/05/11 - Wow!

It's been a looong time since I properly came on fanfiction (to write anything, anyways), but I thought it would be fair to tell you that it is highly doubtful I'll be posting any more stories on here. I kind of lost the art of fan-fiction, and don't feel good writing about stories that have already been written. So, therefore, if you want to read any of my current stories I've been working on, go to my FictionPress page (link above) - although these aren't updated very often either.

Ciao bellas!

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Sayings from my actual everyday life!

Messing Round In The Math Room

Lisa: You smell like soap...

Me: There's a reason for that, you know!

Outside The History Block

Lisa: You smell like candyfloss...

Me: Why do you keep smelling me!!

A Converstaion On MSN

Me: I can't wait to be 16. I don't know why though

Alex: Legal age to have sex?

Me: O.o Eh...No...

Annoying My Friends

Me: You know you're parents hate you when they name you Kelly! (No offence meant to the Kelly's of the world!)

Kelly: Thanks, wait, that wasn't a compliment, was it?

My Friend Annoying Me!

Lisa: Hey, let's become like Lauren. Then we can recognise people by their butts!

An Attempt At Humour!

Me: The stone, it was like, lodged into my foot!

Sadie: Hope it was paying rent!

Confusing Animals

Sadie: I'm a Mockingbird! Woo!

Me: Did you just say "I'm a Mockingbird. Woof?"

Sadie: Rolls eyes

A Horrid Joke!

Kelly: Did you hear about the man who had, like, the entire left-hand side of his body cut off?

Me: No, really?

Kelly: Yeah, but he's all right now!

Lamposts

Lisa: He's straight!

Me: He's gay!!

Lisa: He's as straight as a lampost!

Me: But lamposts bend at the top...

Lisa: silence

Flirting

Lisa: You waved! Playing all 'hard-to-get'!!

Me: No, I was playing 'Ahhhhh, I'm scared!! Leave me the hell alone!!'

READ MY STORIES PLEASE! :)