Hello and welcome to my little corner of this website!! (Actually this isn't a website--it's heaven on Earth.)

My friend everyoneisMISunderstood and I have decided that we are going to take over the world with her ability to predict stuffs, kidnap Greece, and rename it PAM. (You know...the cooking greese? Get it? It's a PUN! WE'RE BEING PUNNY!!...Just laugh already, okay?)

Anyways, My name's Alex and the co-person who sometimes comes on here is Julie, world's most dramatic person in the world. She's also a stalker too!!

So...you've probably come here because:

a) You actually liked one of our stories (XD, yeah right).

b) Someone told you there were come crazy people over here and you wanted to see if it was true.

c) You wanted to look at our very large selection of favorites that mainly revolve around Maximum Ride.

d) You thought the picture looked awesome.

e) You like nachos. You REALLLY like nachos.

f) You've discovered our bacon plots.

g) We reviewed your story, so you decided to stalk our profile and find out more about us before giving a reply. (Courtesty of Miss Summer's Winter.)

My Random Sites:

Artemis Fowl-HQ: Amber Shadow (I sadly don't get on this much anymore.)

deviantART: Alexandria Shadow Ride

Max-Dan-Wiz: Alexandria Shadow Ride (Ditto to this one -- it just kind of died after a while.)

GoodReads: Flame

My Religion:

Flying Spaghetti Monster

Quotes I've Found, Said, Heard, Or Read Over The Years:

Ari's Friend: Who are you?
Me: A crazy sadistic tomboy intent on killing all Iggy and bacon hating Fangers in this world.
Ari's Friend: Oh. You must be Alex.

Luke: You make me want to murder small children.
Me: You make small children want to take on Chuck Norris!
Ashley: Isn't that the same thing?

Luke: You make me want to scream profanities at small children.

Julie: JIGGLY JIGGLY JIGGLY JIGGLY!! IT'S NOT JIGGLING ENOUGH!!

Taylor: I asked him if I could touch his wenus, but he wouldn't let me!

Julie: I like your knees. And your elbows are very nice.

On A Piece of Flair: Give me my fanfiction and no one gets hurt.

Flair: FanFiction--because it's cheaper than therapy.

Flair: FanFiction--It's like crack, but cheaper.

Holly: RUB SOME DIRT IN IT!

Football Coach: Rub some salt and vinegar on it. It'll be okay.

Holly and Me: -cue British accent- SHOT THROUGH THE HEART, AND YOU'RE TO BLAME DARLIN YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME.

Holly: SUV!
Me: SUBURBAN!
Holly: SUV!
Me: SUBURBAN!
Holly: SUV!
Me: SUBUR--BACON!
Holly: That was weird.

Holly: I want an orange elephant too!

Ari: You're obsessed with Iggy.
Me: I swear to Iggy--ah dammit.

Sam, Andrew, and Me: -does Iggy cheer- PELVIC THRUST, PELVIC THRUST, HOO, HOO, HOO!

Luke: (drops apple juice jug) Alex, you friggin' terrorist.

Me: Son of a goddamn bacon eating, unicorn stealing, Iggy hating, Nazi unicorns!

Holly: I want him. I need him. Oh baby, oh baby.

Aimee: That guy is a lying Ronald McDonald fag bag! DUMP HIM, HOLLY.

Me: YES!! DR. M IS A FREAKING EVIL MOM WITH AN EVIL GRIN AND AN AWESOME EVIL CACKLE THAT TURNS EVERYTHING PINK INTO NACHOS AND BACON! WIN! SCORE!

Me: HolyfreakingiPodsofdoommixedwithbaconandnachosandglue.

Me: I will poke you with a pink Barbie spork if you don't fudging back off!

In a chat room on ArtemisFowl-HQ Holly: So close...so close...
Me: Are you screwing Myers while talking to me?

Ashely: I had a dream about you last night, Alex.
Me: I'm scared.
Ashely: EEEWWW! Not like that! I dreamed that you were a vampire, and you ate Taylor. Then you spat her back out, cut off her head, and drank her blood.
Taylor: WHY!!
Me: I wouldn't eat Taylor. She's my best friend.
Ashely: Well, you did, and then you ate all the fat people of the world and ruled it with wolves.
Me: YES!! DRAGONWOLVES OF THE WORLD UNITE!!
Taylor: Dragonwolves?
Me: Yeah! Oh, and I'll keep a few of you alive.
Ashely: Like?
Me: Oh Shelby, Taylor, Sandt21, TheFlyingCamster, EdwardLeftMeHere, everyoneisMISunderstood, and pretty much anyone on fanfiction.
Shelby: Who are those guys?
Me: WAIT, YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT FANFICTION IS??
Shelby: ...no...
Me: Oh you are ssoo on my eat people list.

Aimee: Kitties?
Me: Kitties
Aimee: Kitties?
Me: Kitties
Aimee: Kitties?
Me: Kitties
Logan: SHUT UP!!

Me: So, you know how we said that one guy liked that one girl?
Holly: Yeah.
Me: Well, it turns out that that one guy actually liked that one other girl, and that one girl we thought that one guy liked actually likes the guy we thought liked her, and the girl who we thought liked that dog that belonged to that one girl's sister's cousin's brother happens to be dating that one fish from that one store, and that one fish from that one store likes that dog we thought was dating your sister's stuffed reindeer.
Holly: So what about that one cat we thought liked that guy?
Me: The cat? How the fudgemuffins am I supposed to know about the stupid cat?! I can't keep up with everything!

Julie: -shoves me-
Me: Gah! You violent person!
Julie: I'm not a violent person! I'm the victim in this situation!
Me: Then why did you just push me?
Julie: I didn't push you. You simply fell onto me and I helped you back up.
Me: So you were helping Will when you beat him up with a purse?
Julie: That's different. That was for a commerical. It was acting.
Me: He was covered in bruises.
Julie: He probably has sensitive skin, like me.
Me: Oh yeah, that'll hold up in court.

Me: MUWHAHAHAHA!
Julie: Oh no...
Shelby: Alex, what did you do? You did something didn't you? Didn't you? Ohmygod, you didn't kill someone again, did you? ALEX! What did we tell you about killing people? It's not nice!
Me: MUWHAHAHAHA!
Julie: Oh no! Get AWAY from me you evil twisted person that keeps cackling madly and looks and awful lot like--Ohmygoodness! Look, there's Joe! YAY!

Me: -cocks head to side and gives evil grin- Why so serious?
Sam: Because you just frickin killed that guy!

Me: YES! THEY HAVE NACHOS! -drops down on knees and begins that weird bow thing-
Waiter/Cashier person: So...erm...I take it you want nachos?
Taylor: Haha. No kidding. I wonder how you figured that out? Could it be the crazy girl who is currently bowing in front of your shop because you have nachos?
Waiter/Cashier person: It may have a little something to do with that, yes.

Sydeny: I don't get it! If x equals six, y equals seven, then how does b equal ten? It should be nine! There is no justification in this! There is no logical explantion for why this is true!
Me: Just put what I put.
Sydeny: And that would be?
Me: Because seven ate nine.
Sydeny: -sighs and shrugs- It's worth a shot.

On my answering machine: Hello, you've reached Alexandria. She cannot come to the phone right now, for she is currently battlelingfor world dominance using Coke and bendy straws. Sadly, the Happy Fairy Bunnies have fart arrows, so it may be a long battle. Please leave your message/death threat/scream/cackling laughter/stalkermessage after the C-4 Snicker Bar explodes.

Ms. K: This took me the whole period to write. And I have an English degree. An English degree. What does that tell you?
Brandon: That we need English degrees!

Sub: Where's Connor?
Sam: Dead.
Sub: That's very sad. How did it happen?
Me: He was attacked by the Happy Faerie Bunnies. They're a gang.

Sub: This is the U.S.S...crap.

Ray William Johnson video: You ain't got no pancake mix!

(Random Files Saved On My Computer, Written By Me And Meh Friends)

Dyna: We can't be together Iggy...because...I'M GOING TO LIVE FOREVER!
Iggy: Woah, I did not see that one coming.

Iggy: (picks up the dead Dyna) Dyna, no! Don't go into the light! That's Max's territory, and she still hates you!

Saphire: Yeah, well, it's kind of important.
Gazzy: Yeah, well, she kinda jumped off a cliff.

That feeling? Which feeling? My overwhelming paranoia, which was pretty high on even my best days, or the heart-pounding, mushy feeling I was getting from him being so close? Both were very prominent right now. --Max

That would be Iggy. He loved bacon like I loved Fa--excuse me, nachos.--Max

Gazzy: I just let loose a 10.5 on the Richter scale! There is no way you didn't smell that!

Seth: That was pretty philosophical of you.
Alex: And that was a big word you just used. Guess those English classes you took actually managed to stay in your brain.

Seth: So what if I had been lying in that patch of sunlight over there, completely naked?
Alex: I would have melted into a puddle at the doorway, for my face does not take well to so much concentrated ugly.

Mortal Instruments:

Okay, I would totally pair up Jace Wayland and Church for a fight to the death for the last delicious piece of moo shu pork. I think it would be a tough competition if those two went at it; Church is hard to budge when it comes to getting food scraps (he didn't get that big without some determination on his part), but when it comes to moo shu pork, Jace is the one who's gonna fight like a horde of demons is after him - failure will not be an option, and the enemy must be obliterated. So obviously, I think Jace would win. Moo shu pork is to important to him. He would never let it go! -- Shelley, winner of the Epic Fight of Doom contest.

To love is to destroy, and to be loved is to be the one destroyed. -- Jace

If you were half as funny as you thought you were, you'd be twice as funny as you are. -- Madame Dorthea

You two can't fight forever you know.
Techincally, I can. -- Clary and Simon

"Have you fallen in love with the wrong person yet?'
Jace said, "Unfortunately, Lady of the Haven, my one true love remains myself."
..."At least," she said, "you don't have to worry about rejection, Jace Wayland."
"Not necessarily. I turn myself down occasionally, just to keep it interesting."

"Is this the part where you start tearing off strips of your shirt to bind my wounds?"
"If you wanted me to rip my clothes off, you should have just asked."

"I don't want to be a man," said Jace. "I want to be an angst-ridden teenager who can't confront his own inner demons and takes it out verbally on other people instead."
"Well," said Luke, "you're doing a fantastic job."

Team Simon, because every vampire should wear nerd glasses.

Maximum Ride:

You Know You're Obsessed With Maximum Ride When... (Bold iz me!)

1. You're friends think you're crazy for being obsessed with six flying kids and their talking dog.
2. You see someone in a white lab coat then run off screaming.
3. You've called one of your siblings/friends/family members Max, Fang, Iggy, Nudge, Gazzy, or Angel.
4. You refuse to talk to anyone who's named Ari. (Ari was semi-kewl)
5. You claim you have wings.
6. You drool when you hear the word 'Fang'.
7. You daydream about meeting the flock.
8. You've reread Maximum Ride about 3 times or more.
9. You look for the flock's theme songs and get excited when you find one that fits perfect.
10. You study about birds.
11. You hate science class/refuse to dissect any type of animal.
12. You have a crush on Iggy or Fang or both.
13. You read Fang's blog daily. Even though you know it's JP talking. (Eh...not anymore.)
14. You're waiting for your 'Nick Ride'.
15. You are counting down the days for the next book. (Which is coming out March 15, 2010 -cackles- I'm going to camp out at the book store!) (Well, that book sucked, and I'm crossing my fingers for the next one to be better. COME ON ANGEL. (ANUSMUFFINS IF THE LAST ONE ISN'T FANGING BAD-A I'LL MURDER JP.)
16. You will go to the first opening for the movie, even if it's at midnight.
17. You look in the mirror cautiously to make sure your reflection is not an Eraser.
18. You hate dog crates.
19. You think scientists are evil.
20. You argue with people if Max is a girl's name or a guy's.
21. When your spending the night at a friend's, you say you'll take first watch.
22. You've found a new respect for blind people.
23. You think MR is the best series ever and you want to meet James Patterson, author. (I thought this until the last four came out.)
24. You say 'U and A' a lot.
25. You think you have a Voice like Max.
26. You've gotten your Online Friends hooked on it.
27. You use sarcastic remarks from MR.
28. You know what 'Fax' is.
29. You were one of the characters from MR for Halloween.
30. You claim to have brain attacks.
31. You protect your thoughts. Angel might be reading them.
32. You give a crazy look to people who don't know what MR is.
33. You daydream of flying.
34. You love chocolate chip cookies.
35. You seriously felt like you were in the book.
36. If you want to become a writer because of MR
37. If they make a poster, shirt, key-chain, button, anything MR you will buy it.
38. If you love Fan-fiction. (This is a must even without MR.)
39. In school, it's hard to concentrate because you're thinking of Maximum Ride.
40. You want a talking dog.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

"Yes! Freaks rule!" -Fang

Nudge: "I look like a prep school Barbie. (sees Max) Actually, you look like a prep school Barbie. I'm just Barbie's friend."

"Pick a tree. I'll go carve our initials in it." -Fang

Max: "Fang, Fang, Fang. I love you. I love you sooo much." (tries to hold out arms to show how much)
Fang: "Oh, jeez." Maximum Ride: Saving the World And Other Extreme Sports

Fang: "There is one bright side to this."
Max: "Yeah? What's that?" The new and improved Erasers would mutilate us before they killed us?
Fang: grins "You loooveme. (holds out arms) You love me this much." Maximum Ride: Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

'I vill now destroy de Snickurs bahrs!' Gazzy.

If you are like Max, copy and paste this onto your profile.

"Not so fast. I'll take a cookie. I'm not proud" -Total

"Besides my fashion sense? I play a mean harmonica." -Fang...well, duh

"What is a stink bomb, anyway?" -Gazzy

"I feel like pudding. Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain." -- Iggy

Favorite Books:

Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare

Maximum Ride by James Patterson

Percy Jackson and the Olympians by Rick Riordan

Killer Unicorns by Diana Peferfruend

Zombies vs. Unicorns: Anthology edited by Justine Larbelstier and Holly Black

Nevermore by Kelley Creagh

Song of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce

Beka Cooper by Tamora Pierce

The Immortals by Tamora Pierce

The Circle of Magic/The Circle Opens by Tamora Pierce

Vampire Academy by Richelle Mead

Harry Potter by J. K. Rowling

Lord of the Rings by J. R. Tolkien

Inheritance Cycle by Christopher Paloni

Graceling/Fire by Kristen Cashore

ANYTHING by Anne McCaffery

Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer

Wicked Lovely by Melissa Marr

Uglies by Scott Westerfield

Iron Fey by Julie Kagawa

Lament/Ballad by Maggie Steivfajkflajgelgkjsgkjrslg (I CAN NEVER REMEMBER HOW TO SPELL HER LAST NAME. -headdesk-)

Least Favorite Books:

Twilight by Stephanie Meyer

Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold

The Night World series by L.J. Smith

The Awakening/The Struggle by L.J. Smith

Wake by Lisa McMann

Uninvited by Amanda Marrone

Fever Crumb by Phillip Reeve

Personal Demons by Lisa Desrochers

Fallen by Lauren Kate

Voices of Dragons by Carrie Vaguhn

The Immortals by Alyson Noel

Time of the Witches by Anna Myers

Dragon's Keep by Janet Lee Carey

The Sight by David Clement-Davis

Unleashed by Kristopher Reisz

Skinned by Robin Wasserman

Random People Who I Tend To Talk A Lot To Or Somehow Know Because I'm Just Weird Like That:

everyoneisMISunderstood

Daughters of Shadows

Daughters of the Darkness

Daughter of the Twilifire

bookworminpeace

Summer's Winter

MaxRide101

DarkAngelWings159

Swing Girl at Heart

ALEXANDRIA PICTURES:

Shadow

Rough Gaia

Alex's Eyes

Fang (Looking very emo, I must say. :D But I love the picture.)

Alex' Necklace (Drawn by the insanly awesome MaxRide101)

Alex and Fang

Rough Alex(The middle person, mkays? Not the other two. The girl in the middle.)

Fang/Alex Awkwardness...AKA: Umm... (I love you Max!!)