TO ANYONE WAITING FOR THERE WILL BE VOMIT: K has a major case of writer's block, and she has given up, so my lovely friend LH, listed below, is working on writing up an uber-long final chapter for it, simply because she wanted to, and I didn't want any unfinished stories, and was threatening to take it down.

Not much to say about me, I'm kinda boring. Most of my stories involve inserting my own cast of characters in to shows, books, etc. Though I do try to make stories not involving OCs, but I'm better with them.

My Favorite Whatevers: (If you don't care, skip 'em.)

My favorite shows are, and this is a long list, (deep breath): Supernatural, House, Smallville, Bones, Numb3rs, NCIS, The Closer, Burn Notice, In Plain Sight, Psych, Reaper, Scrubs, Dark Angel, Moonlight, The Mentalist, Sue Thomas F. B. Eye and many others, like The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, and The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. I have also seen probably every episode of Angel ever made, as creepy as that is...But not really a lot of Buffy...huh.

My favorite music:I am a HUGE music finatic and can name a song title and artist after the opening chords a lot of the time, and I love putting lyrics in my stories. My favorite band is Bon Jovi (WHOO!), but I also love (Huge List) Shinedown, Three Days Grace, Matchbox Twenty, Linkin Park, Sum 41, Anna Nalick, Goo Goo Dolls, Evanescence, Fall Out Boy, 3 Doors Down, Weezer,Papa Roach Apocalyptica, Rev Theory, Theory of a Deadman, The Killers, The Fray, The Foo Fighters, Paramore, Seether, Rise Against, Rob Thomas, Santana, Sara Bareilles, Simple Plan, Sixx A.M., The Smashing Pumpkins, Five Finger Death Punch, Guns N' Roses, Hedley, Hinder, Kansas, Motley Crue, Nickelback, Staind, Tantric, The All-American Rejects, The Last Goodnight, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Vanessa Carlton, Our Lady Peace, Panic! At the Disco, Finger Eleven, Avril Lavigne, Maroon 5, Pink, I like Stone Sour better than Slipknot, but both are fine (and have Corey Taylor as the singer if you don't know), AFI, Atreyu, Bush, Colplay, Depeche Mode, The Offspring, some AC/DC and Metallica, Green Day, Disturbed, Avenged Sevenfold, Korn, Tears For Fears(I LOVE Shout (And I have no idea why that is)), and of course, classics like The Beatles and some older groups, and almost everything else. Tell me if I doubled any of those!

My favorite authors:Anything by Meg Cabot, Eoin Colfer, Stephen Cole, Deb Caletti, Darren Shan, Sarah Dessen, James Patterson, etc.

My favorite books/series: Stephen Cole's Thieves series, including Thieves Like Us, Thieves Till We Die (also known as The Aztec Code), and The Bloodline Cipher, and also his Wereling series. Melissa Marr's Wicked Lovely and sequels, Kelley Armstrong's Darkest Powers, James Patterson's Maximum Ride, Alex Sanchez's Rainbow Boys and sequels, L.J. Smith's Night World, Meg Cabot's Princess Diaries and Mediator series as well as Size 12 is Not Fat and it's sequels, Eoin Colfer's Artemis Fowl series, and Darren Shan's Cirque Du Freak and Demonata series. And that's just what I can name off the top of my head.

My view on asking for reviews:

Okay, read the next paragraph after this one, and it will show you how I used to be. I am a reformed (slightly) Review Junkie. But I have learned my lesson the hard way: Asking for a number of reviews usually ends with disappointment! While asking for reviews can often get you some results, you may come across the situation I did: You ask for "x" reviews before you'll post again, and you don't get them. Asking for reviews is what many, especially new writers, do because reviews are the only way the writer can get feedback on how they're doing. If you are not a writer, I'll explain it for you: Writers are like lovesick puppies. We need that sense of security that someone cares enough to review, and we need constant praise and attention. Yes, most of us are very needy when it comes to feedback. For those of you who have done what I refer to below as "Pulling Rank", I say this: Saying that you won't post until given a certain number of reviews can often dissuade a reader from reviewing because they think you're arrogant and needy and only want to feed your ego. Well, readers, like I've already said, Authors are needy! Everyone wants their ego stroked, and reviews are the only way you can do that. But what many authors should think of before demanding reviews: What happens if you don't get the reviews you ask for? I'll tell you- It sucks. You get depressed about your story because you think that no one cares, and you sit there not posting hoping in vain that someone will review. You shouldn't let a lack of reviews get you down.While you're moping about not getting your reviews, you could be writing, and getting your story out there. the more often you post, the higher up your story is in the archives, and the more likely it is that someone will read. By refusing to post, YOU are the one who gets hurt. Everyone, here is the lesson of this rant: DON'T WRITE FOR THE REVIEWS; WRITE FOR YOU. IF YOU LIKE YOUR STORY, AND YOU ENJOY WRITING IT, THEN WHO CARES IF NO ONE READS? YOUR STORY MAKES YOU HAPPY, AND THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS.

This next paragraph is how I used to be, so let it be a lesson to you all!

What is "Pulling Rank"?:Pulling rank is the name I have given to deciding to go on a mini "strike" and not writing the next chapter to a story until you get a given number of reviews. I don't do this to be petty, I do it because when I feel that no one/almost nobody is reading a story, I'll "pull rank" and see what happens. For some reason, reviews fluctuate greatly when people think you may stop. People who've never reviewed before, and may not ever again, in my experience. And sadly, it helps my insecure mind realize that someone actually cares. I also ask that when I pull rank, I only receive 1 review per person, though trying to fill out the remaining reviews yourself (many from one person) is very endearing.

DON'T BE LIKE I WAS!!

Now, I heard some...disturbing things recently, and I wanted somewhere to rant about it, so here it is. I happened to hear some girls talking about how they'd seen some girls kissing, and they continued on about how "raunchy" and "gross" and "wrong" it was. But after that, they went on to say, "But I'm not homophobic." I'd just like to set some things straight here: If you think any of those things about a homosexual couple kissing or even being together, you ARE a homophobe. You can't say that their relationship disgusts you, but then say you don't condemn them for it. Also, some of them said, and I quote on this, "I'm just afraid that she's going to come on to me or something." I must say, don't think so highly of yourselves, people. Even though these girls are pretty, it's not like anyone is falling over at the sight of their ravishing good looks. Let me put it this way: If heterosexual people are nervous to tell others how they feel about them and that they have a crush on them, what makes them think it would be easier for a homosexual to share their feelings? Most, but not all, are nervous to come out in the first place, and the fear of rejection is so strong that they wouldn't even try to come on to anyone, let alone the obvious homophobes in denial. I am a slash fan and I believe that homophobia is wrong, if you can't tell; the reason that I don't out in copy 'n pastes about it is because I don't like having too many cluttering my file, but I DO believe that it should be put to an end. I just thought that someone should hear this little story.

I often get my friends to review things, and they are/go by on here: Bisquik, LH(Who enjoys reviewing under Your Favorite Lab Partner (This is occasionally followed by Ever)), and Kelly/Bucky. They're labeled in the quotes below occasionally, and are sometimes mentioned in the notes in my stories. Just so you know who they are if you're confused. Though I highly doubt that their identities were keeping you up at night, going "Who could they possibly be?!" Because you probably don't care.

The Quotebook:

"I like ketchup...on my food."

"If you listen to Jeopardy! music will that help you?"

"I'm confuzzled."

"Schlap!"-LH

"Blank is a pillow, soft and fluffy." "Peanut Butter."

"I sent it by way of flying hamster."

"Or I'll be forced to take away the freedom of your socks!"-Me

(On frozen seal eyeballs) "They're a fun filled frozen treat! You bite them and it's like 'Wow! It's filled with frozen fun!'"-Me

"Usually they just throw us in the backyard with a toothbrush"-Me

"Just because someone has something doesn't mean you have to touch it."

"You have a rash on your five o'clock shadow."-Me

"We didn't hurt him or anything. He was just dead."

"Only special-ed emos cut other peoples wrists."-Bisquik&Me

"What? I have a special power that allows me to randomly cry out of one eye only?"-Me

"School food is made of the souls of dead children."

"I put my kitty on a treadmill once."-Bisquik

"That makes me feel all flowery and giggly inside."-Me

"You flirt with your grandma?"-Me

"The cell membrane separates the cell from-" "-And Twinkies." "-it's environment and Twinkies."-LH, Me, & LH again

"Grrr. Rarr. Fear me."-Me

"Lil Baby Chicken Bits."-Me

"I want to be a blotch!"-LH

"Mmmmm. Just how I like it. No taste."

"Stupid mustard. I hope you go to Hell!"

"Don't make me throw Jeff the Christmas Dinosaur at you!"-Me

"It's in my cheese!"

"You look like a radioactive lemon."-Me

"I wish my lysosomes would clean the windshield!"-LH

"Oh, Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! I just got robbed!"

"I feed off of your pain and suffering."-Me

"I'm in a box. No, I'm not in a box, I'm in a sphere."-LH

"-This would be a regular polygon, it's a rectagon." "New shape!"-The second person is LH

"I'm like the touch of death!"-LH

"Mmmm...Frozen Orange Juice..."-Me

"Potato Time!"-LH

"Tater tots are Potato Children."-Me

"Water breaks stuff."

"I always smile when I cut cucumbers."-LH

"Be a bear. Rip someones head off."-Bucky&Me-Happy now Bucky?! (My friend bugged me that this wasn't posted up here.)

"Don't be suprised if I spit up blood."-Me

"Do I have a sticker on my back?" "Would you like to have a sticker on your back?"-Bisquik&Me-This goes along with the next one.

"Are my teeth still blue?" "Would you like your teeth to be blue?"-LH&Me-I was being special that day.

"I was about to say a lack of oxygen to your soul."-Me

"Flip the page. At least try to pretend you're paying attention."-Ah, my friend LH. Without her, I'd probably be failing right now.

"So you're illiterate in two languages?"

"Don't eat yogurt and then spin around in a chair. The yogurt is not happy."-Me, and let that be a life lesson to you all!!

"It squeaks."

If you like any of these or if any make you laugh, PLEASE tell me!! I want to know if these are okay or if you don't like them and they should be removed. I personally love 'em, though, but I want to know YOUR thoughts on them! OTHER than LH's!!(She said a lot of them)

My thoughts on Copy N' Pastes:

I like most copy and paste things that I read, and I agree with many of them, but I don't post them because I've seen some very messy profiles due to too many copy n' pastes. Just because I don't post them, don't say that I don't support them without asking me first.

Here's my one exception to my self-imposed copy and paste ideals, because I have something to add to it.

12 (Now 13) Fun Things To Do To Get Salespeople on the Phone to Hang Up

1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. Ask, "How long can I keep it? Do I have to ever pay it back, or is it like the other money I borrowed before my bankruptcy?"

2. If you get one of those pushy people who won't shut up, just listen to their sales pitch. When they try to close the sale, tell them that you'll need to go get your credit card. Then, just set the phone down and go do laundry, shopping or whatever. See how long that commission based scum waits for you to get your credit card.

3. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "Why do you want to know?" Or you can say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one seems to care these days and I have all these problems, my sciatica is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died..." When they try to get back to the sales process, just continue on with telling about your problems.

4. If the person says he's Joe Doe from the ABC Company, ask him to spell his name, then ask him to spell the company name, then ask where it is located. Continue asking personal questions or questions about the company for as long as necessary.

5. This one works better if you are male: Telemarketer: "Hi, my name is Julie and I'm with Dodger & Peck Services... You: "Hang on a second." (few seconds pause) "Okay, (in a really husky voice) what are you wearing?"

6. Crying out, in well-simulated tones of pleasure and surprise, "Julie!! Is this really you? I can't believe it! Julie, how have you BEEN?" Hopefully, this will give Julie a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where the heck she could know you from.

7. Say, "No," over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each no, and keep an even tempo even as they're trying to speak. This is the most fun if you can keep going until they hang up.

8. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up with their Family and Friends plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can muster, "I don't have any friends...would you be my friend?"

9. If they clean rugs: "Can you get blood out, you can? Well, how about goat blood or HUMAN blood - chicken blood too?"

10. Let the person go through their spiel, providing minimal but necessary feedback in the form of an occasional "Uh-huh, really, or, "That's fascinating." Finally, when they ask you to buy, ask them to marry you. They get all flustered, but just tell them you couldn't give your credit card number to someone who's a complete stranger.

11. Tell them you work for the same company they work for. Example: Telemarketer: "This is Bill from Widget & Associates." You: "Widget & Associates!! Hey I work for them too. Where are you calling from?" Telemarketer: "Uh, Dallas, Texas." You: "Great, they have a group there too? How's business/the weather? Too bad the company has a policy against selling to employees! Oh well, see ya."

12. Tell the Telemarketer you are busy and if they will give you their phone number you will call them back. If they say they are not allowed to give out their number, then ask them for their home number and tell them you will call them at home (this is usually the most effective method of getting rid of Telemarketers). If the person says, "Well, I don't really want to get a call at home," say, "Ya! Now you know how I feel." (smiling, of course...)

13. Pretend that you are a cop and are at your house to investigate your own murder. Ask their relation to the victim (you), where they were during the crime, their name, address, phone number, etc. and if anyone can vouch for their alibi. Continue to interrogate them and ignore all of their protests that they do not know you and were just calling to solicit you. End in any way you see fit, such as waiting for them to hang up, telling them someone will be in contact with them, asking them not to leave the area, or, if you want to blow your cover, once they admit to soliciting you, shout "Ha! I knew it!" and hang up.

My brother heard a recording of a guy actually pretending to be a cop to a telemarketer once and saying that he was investigating a murder, and made it sound like the telemarketer was their new prime suspect. I thought it was a good idea.