UPDATE: I finally got a pic of Itachi's kids done! You can check it out over on Deviant Art. Just look me up under the same name and you can see it in my gallery. First of many pics, hopefully! I'm in negotiations for others...

Hello, all. I don't really have much to say except...I'm new to fanfic writing so please bear that in mind when reading my work. A lot of what I write will be related to Bonded in some way, but I've been toying with more and more ideas for unrelated stories.

DISCLAIMER FOR ALL MY MATERIAL: I OWN NOTHING, NOT THE CHARACTERS OR THE MANGA OR TV SHOWS THEY ARE DERIVED FROM.

About me: I'm just seriously fucked up in every way you can think of. I'm kind of happy with that fact, actually.

My Take On Reviews and Reviewers: I love reviews. I think many authors don't feel their writing is validated without a review or ten. I believe wholeheartedly in reviews and focusing on positive points in the work you're reviewing. If something that isn't positive simply must be said, then tact and diplomacy go a long way toward easing any hurt or resentment you may cause. I follow this policy.

What I don't believe in is flamers. Some people don't even necessarily flame, but they'll nitpick and focus on every fucking thing about a chapter that pissed them off or that wasn't right or that to them didn't make sense...and then they'll keep going back to read subsequent chapters and complain about those. Yes, I have/had someone doing that for Bonded and New Bonds. A word of advice: if after the first few chapters my writing style does not appeal to you then GET YOUR ASS TO ANOTHER STORY AND SHUT THE FUCK UP. Jesus, why keep reading something you don't like? I'll tell you why. Because people like that have such an inferiority complex that they have to belittle other people's work in order to make themselves feel good. I've even heard it said that some people bitch about other people's stories because the stories are too good. Not saying mine is...I know I'm untutored and my stuff is raw, but then take your sorry self to some story that agrees with you. Honestly, I don't mind constructive criticism on technical junk, but flaming the storyline? Please, there's plenty of fiction on this site, go find something you agree with.

No matter how bad a piece of work is that I read, I would never ever hurt the author's feelings by flaming or debase myself by being so negative. Seriously, is this site full of middle school brats?!

Personality Profile: ISTJ- Based on the standard measure of personality traits, you have a quiet determination and a sharp mind. You are adaptable and can work independently or on a team. You are a careful thinker and get all the details before making any decisions. While others provide emotional support in a situation, your clear and logical thinking allows you to solve the problem. And if some people think you are stubborn at times, they know that you are the type of person they look to in a crisis.

Favorites: I used to have a bunch of crap here about food, books and shows, but let's forget all that and get down to my real favorites. And they are (in no particular order): Writing, writing, writing. Pranking people. Laughing when other people get hurt. Making people mad. make-up. Yaoi (especially two seme oriented males). Seeing people run for their lives. Seeing people argue/fight.

Things I hate (with a passion): SasuSaku (seriously, any fic with these two just makes me want to take a machine gun and go on a killing spree. Any fic with Sakura having Sasuke's baby brings on the aforementioned rage squared.), Sasukarin (ugh! I hate how he let's her touch him in the anime! Narusasu 4life!) Twilight (how could bella do that to jacob, just how??), Weak, girly, crybaby ukes (ugh), Sports shit on Tv like baseball or march madness, crappy writing.

Progress:

1. Ties That Bind~ chapter 2 in the works.

2. Giftfics- Just waiting for SafireCharmz to specify a pairing!

Thanks for stopping by, check out my forums and homepage!

DMNQ8

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║║║║╔╗║╔╗║║║╠╗╔╣╔╗║║║Put this on your
║║║║╚╝║╚╝╣║║║║║║║║║╚╝page if you love
║║║║╔╗║╔╗║╚╝║║║║╚╝║╔╗Naruto!
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MISC

~19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity~

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Drugs".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. dont use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.Most
people dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right person to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. Then maybe you should have kept your mouth shut.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman. Try Vegas.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights. Go rent a movie, that's borderline incest. Gay incest.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time. Sad. Shit happens, though, people die all over the world.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room. It's called wearing a disguise, HELLO!

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me. If you're not adopted how are you living with them?

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. I suggest you buy a 9 mm or take up kung fu when that happy day arrives.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear. Yeah, high school's a bitch.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men. prank call her into submission.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me. Huh??

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. Ditch the woman if you want your kids, you selfish bitch!

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman. And what do you need the system for? All you need is a razor and some hair grease.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male. I suggest you man up or go watch 'Enough'. If that bitch could do it, then so can you.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men. Get over yourself.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that. And what they said matters...why??

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual. now that is some shit right there.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me. You could always move to the woods and go native...I hear it's very liberating. Lets see how guilty you feel without HBO.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind. Church is over rated anyway. Besides, you can watch that shit on TV.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. Actually what the world needs most is renewable energy but...whatever.

Here's 50 random questions:

1) Are you in a relationship with somebody? Yes, and I'm trying to get out of it just as quick as I possibly can.

2) Do you hate more than 3 people? I generally hate everyone who's not related to me...and I hate a few relatives, too.

3) How many houses have you lived in? Actual houses or will apartments do? Ok, well I've lived in 15 apartments and houses.

4) Favourite candy bar? snickers and babe ruth

5) Favourite shoes? timberlands and anything with ed hardy.

6) Have you ever tripped someone? used to trip hubby daily.

9) Do you own a Britney Spears CD? hell to the no

10) Have you ever thrown up in public? once

11) Name one thing that is always on your mind. money

12) Favourite genre of music? punk rock

13) What is your zodiac sign? virgo

14) What time were you born? around 7 AM

15) Do you like beer? never tried it

16) Ever made a prank phone call? mmmm...no

18) Are you sarcastic? no, I tend to be very literal

19) What are your favourite colours? black, maroon, cream

20) How many watches do you own? one

21) Summer or winter? neither. I love fall.

23) Favourite colour to wear? any

24) Pepsi or Sprite? coke

25) What colour is your mobile phone? black and grey

26) Where is your second home? work, I guess

27) Have you ever slapped someone? yes, thankfully

28) Have you ever had a cavity? very few.

29) How many lamps are in your bedroom? None.

30) How many video games do you own? none

31) What was your first pet? seal-point siamese cat

32) Ever had braces? yes

33) Do looks matter? yes, in a way, but I don't judge by them. I just know that I'm judged on mine.

34) Do you use chapstick? no, I use lip balm from the body shop.

35) Name 3 teachers from your Secondary school. what the hell is secondary school? Is that like elementary? Um...Ms. Emma, Ms. Rogers and Ms. Cathy

36) American Eagle or Abercombie? Ugh, neither. I like goth wear

37) Are you too forgiving? I never forgive anyone anything ever.

38) How many children do you want? no more than what I already got.

39) Do you own something from Hot Topic? no

40) Favourite breakfast meal? steak and potatoes. With gravy.

41) Do you own a gun? No.

42) Ever thought you were in love? yes. And I now know love is nothing but poison that kills you slowly.

43) When was the last time you cried? yesterday while drafting a scene for Ties That Bind.

44) What did you do 3 nights ago? Let's see, that was Friday? I might have been watching TV.

45) Olive Garden? La Panera? T.G.I.Friday's all the way.

46) Have you ever called your teacher mommy? fuck no.

47) Have you ever been in a castle? uhhh...I think there was this haunted castle ride once...

48) Nicknames? for people? None. And I hate nicknames for myself.

49) Do you know anyone named Bertha? no.

50) Ever been to Kentucky? drove through a few times, I guess.

This next bit is inspired by those 50 random things up there, which I took from SexyKakashi99's profile.

50 random things about me

1. I write constantly with a break only once every week or so

2. I'll be using a beta for all future work

3. I started writing less than a year ago

4. I hate most fruit

5. I'm violent

6. I used to wish I'd be kidnapped so I could experience the adventure

7. I'm heartless, callous yet at the same time extremely sensitive

8. I like getting injections at the doctor's

9. I think marines are hot

10. I hate everything about Disney

11. Hope I never fall in love again

12. I like planting things

13. am lazy beyond imagining

14. I frequently curse, especially while driving.

15. the things I hate are the things I do well

16. love languages, especially japanese, croatian, spanish

17. I'm attracted to tall, corporate, ball-busting women who think they own the world (I would so dominate their asses)

18. I'm attracted to tall, hunky men with long hair (they could so dominate my ass)

19. I think angry people are funny

20. 99.9 percent of the time the stuff in my fics that people think is funny isn't funny to me (seriously, what did you guys find so funny about Just A Kiss?? o.0)

21. I miss NYC (home)

22. am depressed most of the time

23. love my reviewers

24. am a studious kind of individual

25. perfectionist (I don't know how those typos slip by me, I edit and edit and edit...hence the beta thing from now on)

26. have decided to buy a cow and raise it on my balcony since the price of cheese is so atrocious

27. I make my own sofrito

28. i like working out

29. I like lifting weights

30. i hate aerobics classes and yoga

31. I've been told I have great stamina and strength

32. I'm opinionated, but not judgemental

33. I'm a neat freak

34. I think philosophy is another word for insanity

35. I think psychology is fascinating

36. simple things surprise and please me

37. I can't watch TV without putting something in my mouth

38. I have black hair and brown eyes

39. I'm hispanic (with some other shit thrown in)

40. have my own personal library of over 300 books

41. I'm nerdy sometimes

42. I'm very very moody, but unfailingly polite to people (as I've been brought up to be)

43. extremely ignorant of almost all things social (grew up isolated)

44. terrified of getting lost

45. the sight of squid and/or jellyfish is enough to give me nightmares

46. I think mice are cute

47. I think revenge is a wonderful thing and a worthy way of life

48. I don't get the whole rp thing

49. I'm into alternative medicine

50. I have a big cyber crush on one of my reviewers (and I frequently fantasize about him)