snails-on-the-french-riviera

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since	: 01-22-09, id: 1813357, Profile Updated: 08-25-11
country	: USA

Author has written 12 stories for Of Mice and Men, Harry Potter, Batman Begins/Dark Knight, Shakespeare, Stargate: Atlantis, Law and Order: SVU, and Redwall.

Hoo, boy... It's been a while since I've updated this, hasn't it?

Lessee now, what can I say about myself? I'm in high-school, although my maturity level is highly debatable. I'm a dancer, a singer, an actor (a truly, truly atrocious actor, but an actor nonetheless), a voracious reader, and a writer. My writing tends to fluctuate between crack and full on angst. I aspire to be a novelist or a screenwriter, but will probably end up teaching kindergarten. I'm totally fine with that, though.

I'm a shameless little slasher. Boys with boys? yep. Girls with girls? like that too. And as a result of far, far too much time reading fanfic, I'm incredibly hard to squick. So if you're here trolling through people favorites list looking for good fics, be forewarned: there may be some truly bizarre ones in mine.

That's about it. My stories tend to be infrequently updated, these days. I'm working on it, really, but an incredibly short attention span and an incredibly heavy homework load (I'm going to be taking four APs and a creative writing course in the fall) make for an incredibly small amount of time to be devoted to my fic. *le sad*

But hey- one of these days, right?

Mental Hospital Phone Menu

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental
Hospital .

Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2
for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you
want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be
forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little
voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which
number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the
beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have
short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss,
press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our
operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn
on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.

If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just
mess it up.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

1. Between Ivory Keys reviews
When he was younger, Rodney always rather loved the piano.
Stargate: Atlantis - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 758 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7-12-10 - Rodney M. - Complete

2. Eccentric Ideas reviews
Not to be taken seriously. Lucius and Harry end up in Mossflower via some weird trick of magic. now, they must work together to get home, but that may be easier said than done.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Redwall - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 893 - Reviews: 14 - Published: 2-26-10

3. Left Alone to Wander reviews
Why do I do this? ...Helena reflects on her reflection, and on the years of her life. a death-fic of a sorts. Feedback is, as always, very much appreciated.
Shakespeare - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 567 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5-26-09 - Complete

4. As Yet Unseen » reviews
When Olivia and Elliot are kidnapped -yes, you read that right- in the middle of an investigation, things start to get a little odd. not to mention confusing. a Harry Potter/SVU crossover featuring Gay!Fey!Harry. Majorly AU for HP. XD
Crossover - Harry Potter & Law and Order: SVU - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Crime - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,985 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 5-25-09 - Severus S. & O. Benson

5. Paper Rains » reviews
Draco gets partnered with that darn Potter kid for a term project. Fun times are ahead! And what does the mysterious sketchbook Draco found in the library have to do with it? Prologue now deleted, editing undergone. UPDATED, AT LONG LAST!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,436 - Reviews: 19 - Updated: 5-21-09 - Published: 2-25-09 - Draco M. & Harry P.

6. Why do You reviews
Hermia is in need of reassurance, which Lysander provides. Shamelessly fluffy, slightly ridiculous. enjoy!
Shakespeare - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,060 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 5-21-09 - Complete

7. Why do I reviews
A poem about being in love with someone you know isn't good for you. anonymous PoV. angst-y, I guess. feedback appreciated.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 280 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 5-20-09 - Complete

8. A Moment in Time reviews
A fluffy one-shot featuring Hermia and Lysander. Takes place Pre-Midsummers Night Dream.
Shakespeare - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 713 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5-20-09 - Complete

9. A Snake in a Fabric Shop reviews
A very short and utterly pointless one-shot about little Draco Malfoy in Madam Malkins, thinking about fabric... yeah, i don't understand it either. please read.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,208 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 3-2-09 - Draco M. & Narcissa M. - Complete

10. Bruce's Lips
There's a crazy person in Gordon's office, babbling about lips. what the heck? a crack fic-esque oneshot. luv you!
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,381 - Published: 2-18-09 - J. Gordon - Complete

11. The Consequences of Boredom reviews
Poor Draco is bored! whatever shall we do? Blaise has an idea... first attempt at fluff, so be nice, please. contains minor slash, i.e. kissing.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 405 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 2-12-09 - Draco M. & Blaise Z. - Complete

12. Invisible reviews
um.. this is my first fic, so I'm sorry if its horrendous... its my view of how Curley feels. Please don't kill me for being awful. rated T for angsty-ness. one-shot I DO NOT OWN! i forgot to put it in the actual story, so there it is. please review?
Of Mice and Men - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,474 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 1-25-09 - Complete