hiya! i am bonkers and lv cheese! cheese, cheese, cheese! i also love foxes, ducks, bumblebees, ladiebirds and...FOXES! Foxes, foxes, foxes!

ok now i have got that over with i'll mention the more sensable side of my self. I am thirteen and adore writing stories, infact i drive my freinds nuts because i am writing so much! i hope you will read my stories and comment acordingly i put a lot of work into these and would like to know if there is any way to improve it.

Also I absolutly love the Sherlock Holmes books! yay S.H!

i have a twitter page

http://twitter.com/han8661

Fave colour- Orange and green

Fave food for eating - cheese, onion and potato pie

Fave food for cooking - Fish pie

oh yer i'm peskitarian

Fave random word - Cheese

Oh come on you purple curtian eating yellow kettle, you didn't really expect that retarded Christmas tree to eat that Manekin did you cheebus?

here is some funny stuffs i found

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this into your profile!

If you ever pushed on a door that said "Pull" copy this into your profile.

If you've ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects, copy this into your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

98 of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ran up a "Down" escalator, copy this into your profile.

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it's uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their asses off at the others.

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you think that Writer's Block blows (sucks), copy and paste this into your profile.

A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know ands wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

Just because we eat animals for food doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! Did you know that to get the fur, they club, drown, and anal electrocute the poor animals? And why are they so cruel? Because they don't want to ruin the furs! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc. copy this into your profile!

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, why aren't two mooses meese, or if two foots are feet, why arn't two footballs feetball? People call me crazy, but I'm just random!(but I'm crayzee too) If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

92 percent of the teenage population has switched to Rap. If you are in the 8 percent who still ROCKS, copy & paste this into your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this to your profile.

93 percent of american teens would have an emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?" or "Your point being?" or "You just realized this now?" or "Wow, you're even more stupid than you look." or nevermind, just copy this to your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy and paste this into your profile.

I prefer solitude over company. Copy and paste this in your profile you have the same feeling.

Copy and Paste this into your profile if you didn't know that the Alphabet Song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and Baa Baa Black Sheep all have the same tune, and all were composed by Mozart.

98 percent of the Internet population has a Myspace account. If you're part of the 2 percent that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

Insult marching band, and you insult an EXTREMELY fast mob of kids with various instruments that can be shoved into VERY unpleasnt places.

If you have ever burst out laughing about something in a book, and people look at you weird, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have a tendency to talk/sing to yourself copy and paste this to your profile.

fave quotes

My name is Sherlock Holmes. It is my business to know what other people don't know. ~Sherlock Holmes~

Strange how the symbol for "female" looks suspiciously like a magnifying glass... ~Nancy Drew~

Come at once, if it is convenient. If it is inconvenient, come all the same. ~Sherlock Holmes~

I have gone out to look for myself. If I get back before I return, please tell me to wait.~unknown (I dunno...I just thought it was kinda clever)~

"Detection is, or ought to be, an exact science and should be treated in the same cold and unemotional manner. You have attempted to tinge it with romanticism, which produces the same effect as if you worked a love story or an elopement into the fifth proposition of Euclid." - Sherlock Holmes, The Sign of Four

"Who on earth was Euclid?" - Jeremy Brett

only ever makes an attempt to leave it when his food is served.”

I bit back my immediate desire to remark that the cat sounded remarkably like Holmes’s brother Mycroft

The Inheritance of Barnabus Aloysius Peabody - charleygirl

Stupid Last Words:

What does this button do?

It's probably just a rash.

Are you sure the power is off?

The odds of that happening have to be a million to one!

Which wire was I supposed to cut?

I wonder where the mother bear is.

I've seen this done on TV.

These are the good kind of mushrooms.

It's strong enough for both of us.

This doesn't taste right.

I can do that with my eyes closed.

I've done this before.

Well, we've made it this far.

That's odd.

I'll just put my head in it to make sure.

Don't be so superstitious.

Now watch this.

Look Ma! No Hands!

Don't worry, It's not contagious

Of course it's safe

It can't get any worse...

There's only one way to find out_

The Insanity Test ( I've crossed the ones that apply to me)

X You have screamed at an inanimate object for 'hurting you.'
X You have ran into a glass/screen door.
You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
X You have thought of something funny and laughed, and then people gave you weird looks.
X You have run into a tree/bush.
X You have been called a blond.

X You know that it IS possible to lick your elbow.
X You just tried to lick your elbow.
xYou never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star had the same melody.
X You just sang them to make sure.
X You have tripped on your own feet and fallen.
XYou have choked on your own spit.

You have seen the Matrix and still don't get it. (Of course I get it, I’ve whached it 5 times)
You type with three fingers or less.
X You have accidentally caught something on fire.
X You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose.
X You have caught yourself drooling

X You have fallen asleep in class.
X Sometimes you just stop thinking.
X Sometimes when you are telling a story you forget what you are talking about.
X People often shake their heads and walk away from you
XYou are often told to use your 'inside voice.'

xYou use your fingers to do simple math.
X You have eaten a bug accidentally...
X You are taking this test when you should be doing something more important.
X You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it.
X You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand/pocket the whole time.

XYou have posted bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen if you don't.
X You break a lot of things.
X You tilt your head when you're confused.
X You have fallen out of your chair before.
X When you're lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture on the ceiling.
X The word "um" is used frequently.
xYou don't know what "um" means.

X You say "what" and "huh" a lot.
X You plan to use a calculator to multiply your score for this bulletin. (a laptop’s a calculator)

GRAND TOTAL: 33

Now divide it by thirty eight and times by 100

I'm eighty seven percent crazy!

Stupid things to do in public (Some work best in a library)

1. Sit in your car and when a car passes by roll the window down and point at them with a hand puppet.

2. Using the same hand puppet start having loud arguments with it in the middle of a food court.

3. Go to a toy store and gather all of the soft Teddy's and make a den. When people stare yell loudly ' IM GOING TO SET THE BEARS ON YOU!' When they go away start singing a teddy bears picnic really loudly. Works best if your over the age of 12

4. Walk into an expensive store and proclaim you have new socks on really loudly at the cashier

5. When everything is quiet in a library walk up to an old man and stare at him for a short time and then say 'What are you doing here? I thought I got rid of you!' And leave the library.

6. Run up to all old women and yell ' GRAMSIES!!'. The woman could be middle aged XD

7. Tell a lame joke and if anybody laughs go 'Hahahahaha...NO!' And put your slowly nodding head into your hands

8. Go up to small children with balloons, steal the balloon and let it go in front of the child yelling' FLY MY PRECIOUS FLY!"' Then turn back around to the kid and say 'I'm ashamed of you'. Then walk away.

9. Go up to random people, put your arm around them and say how your Britney Spears and you've lost your knickers

10. Go up to random people and yell stupid nicknames or 'ENID!' and try to hi five them.If they look at you weirdly then run, if they hi five you back just go 'Excuse me, do I know you?'

11. Every often open up your hand-bag and yell 'ARE YOU ALRIGHT IN THERE?'.

12. Go to the Customer Service Desk and say you've lost your button. Say your name is Benjamin and you would like the store to be asked on the P.A to look for it. Laugh your butt off as the Server will say 'This is a person at the counter called Benjamin and they have lost there button. If anyone sees Benjamin's Button can you please return it to the Customer Service Desk. I repeat, Benjamin has lost his Button,'

Stupid things people say or ask:

1. When you just got smacked in the face by an object and people ask if you are OK. HELLO! I JUST GOT SMACKED IN THE FACE! OF COURSE IM NOT OK!

2. Can I ask you a question? What if I didn't want you to ask me a question? You've already crossed that line haven't you!

3. When people ask how much something is in a dollar/pound shop. Seriously. You want price tags or something?!

4. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.. I know where my watch is pal, where is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? No!

5. People who are willing to get off their bottoms to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

6. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it" Too right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it? Eh?

7. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would I keep looking after I've found it?

8. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". "No you stupid ignoramus, I paid 5 quid to come to the cinema and stare at the floor".

9. When something is "new and improved"! Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it. Make your mind up!!

10. When people say "life is short." What's that?? Life is the longest thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

11. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" "Yeah, the bus came and y'know I just decided not to get on it and wait for the next one!"

12. Drive carefully! No. I'm going to drive with my eyes closed and use my toes to steer. Seriously! Somethings don't need to be said. Though I would hate to see your driving if you have to remind yourself to drive carefully.

13. People who say things like "my eyes aren't what they used to be." So what did they used to be? Ears ?!Wellington boots?!

14. When you're eating something and someone asks "Is that nice?" No, it's really revolting I always eat stuff I hate.

He He

check out my storys grins