Age: Do I look like I trust you?? Ahh.. You cant see me at all. Should've guessed. Lets just say 18 and be done with it.
Location: I honestly have no Idea. Lost somewhere between SB, TvTropes and TFF.
Looks: I'm blond, blue eyes, average built. About 5'8 tall.
Likes: Books, Reading, Manga(Anime to lesser degree), good Movies, TFF, SB, TvTropes, gardening, cooking.
Dislikes: Liars(I am a firm believer that you'd be better of keeping your mouth shut then trying to lie), slobs, drunkards(Don't have anything against about getting smashin' drunk once and again, but those who take it too far just piss me off), drugs(this shit took lives of a lot of good people), emos, dunderheads.
Crazy idea: Zangetsu has more then one shikai technique; the other one? It's none other then 'Hougetsu Jingen-tou'(Moon Crushing Dimensional Sword) from RV II.
Reproducing Administrative Prototype Emancipated Robo-Squid - ReAPERS
Ado Edem - The Most Badass Treehugger... Ever.
When the war of the beasts brings about the world's end,
Infinite in mystery is the gift of the goddess.
There is no hate, only joy
My friend, do you fly away now?
My friend, the fates are cruel,
Even if the morrow is barren of promises,
Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky,
One Ring to rule them all,
in the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
Tall ships and tall kings
Wizard's First Rule: People can be made to believe any lie, either because they want to believe it's true, or because they are afraid it's true.
Familiarity, the first myth of reality: What you know the best, you observe the least
Devotion, the second myth of reality: The faithful are most hurt by the objects of their faith
Conviction, the third myth of reality: Only those who seek the truth can be deceived.
Fellowship, the fourth myth of reality: As the tides of war shift, so do loyalties
Trust, the fifth myth of reality: Every truth holds the seed of betrayal.
Lament of the Galant Jiraiya
"The true measure of shinobi is not in how he lives, but how he dies... It's not what they do in life, but what they did before dying that proves their worth.
Thinking back on it, my life story is one full of failures. Tsunade turned me down every time. I couldn't save my friend. I failed to protect my student... and my teacher... Compared with the Hokages who came before me, my accomplishments have all been petty and insignificant. I wanted to die like them. A tale is only as good as its final turn of events, after all...
I had come to a 'conclusion' about how my life would end a long time ago. I lived believing my shortcomings were just amusing distractions! That my failings would build a character! I lived believing that. And in return... After all those losses and mistakes I would be granted one great, final adventure... And die a death befitting a true shinobi. I was really passionate about this... heheh... But this... isn't how I wanted it to turn out... my tale ending like this...
The Great Sage prophesied that I would rise a 'revolutionary'. Someone upon whom the fate of the entire shinobi world would rest... And that I would have o make a big decision... And when the time came, I decided to defeat Pain, stop the Akatsuki, and save the ninja world from ruin... Yet another entry in my long list of failures...
This is not how "The Tale of Jiraiya the Gallant" was supposed to end. Writing this story... It's all been just a waste off time."
The Truth of Orkz:
The Ork worship Gork (who is brutal but cunning) and Mork (who is cunning but brutal) - the subtle difference being that Mork hits you when you aren't looking, Gork hits you hard when you are. The Big Dakka, as theorized by leading Ork Oddboyz (generally Mekz and Weirdboyz), isn't so much an act of Gork and Mork as it was an act of the Orkz (all of the Orkz) of the previous incarnation of the Universe, and will also be the culmination of the existence of this universe (Da Big Krump, which is immediately followed by a new Big Dakka).
There is, of course, a rivaling school of thought that claims that the universe is actually just a part of Da Big Choppa, but the Shoota school keeps shooting them to bits when they try to present their argument, so no one has actually heard it.
- by Jonen C
Honorary Member of The Book of Log.
Position: Log Worshipper(Since 05/28/2011)
Possible Book of Log Positons:
Log Worshipper: Beginning position. No requirements
Log Priest: You have created at least 1 Naruto related fanfic that frequently (every 2-4 chapers) praises the almighty log and actually fits into the story
Log Pope (there can be more than 1 pope... its safer that way): you have created 3 naruto related fanfics that frequently praise the almighty log
OR the Fanfic that already occasionally praises the log has at least 400 reviews
OR you create a (decently made) Naruto fanfic focused on praising the log... log forbid.
Excerpt of the log number 124: When using the log to escape a fire jutsu, it is Konoha custom to write an apology letter to the log, and, depending on rank of jutsu escaped from, depicts how many words are needed. C-rank: two thousand; B-rank: one thousand five hundred; A-rank: one thousand. Only S-rank and higher or excused from the writing of the letter. Even then, it is still recommended.
Log excerpt number 231: If Konoha shinobi celebrate the holiday of Christmas, then it is required that they put gifts under the Christmas Log. Use of a full tree is an insult to the log and if found out that shinobi is uneligible from using The Log for a period of two months.
Log excerpt number 437: Use of the log in a situation that clearly could be avoided using a variety of other methods or techniques is looked down upon. In order to repent for such actions, the following steps should be taken:
- For every dent caused by your replacement you shall plant one sapling;
- For every stab wound caused by your replacement you shall plant five saplings;
- For every hole in the log caused by your replacement you shall plant ten saplings;
- For every detached piece of the log caused by your replacement you shall plant one sapling per square inch of detached log;
- For a destroyed and unusable log caused by your replacement you shall plant twenty-five saplings.
If your log is defective you may call 1-800-BAD-LOGS to file a complaint. If your case is proven correctly your next replacement will be half cost.
'And the willow sayeth unto the ninja: wherefore dost I weep? 'Tis tears of joy, as thy kin and mine together fell thine foes, those who would bring the axe and torch to the wood. The log is thine ally, and mine kin. Calling upon the log, is to call upon me. To aid thee in battle, I weep my tear of joy.
'As the log takes your place, you become the log. The log becomes you. For a moment, you are an extension of the logs blessing unto ninja.'
'You are fools! Your log is but a mockery of the power of ninja!- the ninja from the desert declared. And the people shook their heads.
'And as the smoke cleared, his foe stared in awe at the log. Blackened and charred, the log crumbled. The ninja, filled with righteous wrath, fell upon his foe and slew him. He made his way to the log, and wept. His companion, the log that had accompanied him through so many battles, was no more. he spoke thus to his fallen companion: though now you have fallen in battle, you rest where the logs forever grow. The forest of life called for you, and you answered its call, as you did mine. I thank you, my friend.'
'He despaired, for in this place of stone and earth, there was no logs to be found. Reaching out with all his might, he begged for a Log in the forsaken wasteland. And he was answered, and saved by the log, in a place where there were none.
'The Log took his place and fell, forever into the abyss. The people, hearing of this, railed against him, in such numbers he swore to never endanger another log again. For many years, he fought without the log, growing more and more weary with each passing day. Finally, he came across a foe that was too strong for him. As his life was about to end, he felt a familiar pull, and found himself out of harms way, seeing a log in his place. His stunned foe was felled in his stupor, and he approached the log, he knew it, for it was the same that fell so long ago. He asked of The Log: "Why did you endanger yourself for me again? Have you not done enough for me?" And The Log spoke: "It is my duty, and our bond. We exist to save the ninja, and they exist to save the trees. We both play a part, for which I am content".'
Let it be known that it is absolutely forbidden to willingly perform the technique known as "1000 years of death" on a log. It is also equally frowned upon for one to replace oneself with a Holy Log for the purpose of avoiding said technique. The punishment for such actions is at least 6 months of banishment from the use of The Holy Log.
Book Of Shinto:
'In the Beginning the land was filled with monsters, and men and woman alike sought refuge in their castles. They prayed to their goddess, who provided protection and guidance to their souls. From these stone fortresses they created recipes, and therefore food, to nourish and enjoy themselves. Each castle defended their recipe viciously, though many clambered for each other's recipes they held resolute their will that their delicacies stay in their lands alone. However, their bodies weakened with time and before long only their stone walls guarded them from the outside evils. The world became bleaker and bleaker, ancient walls slowly succumbing to ruinous powers. Until one day, He stood up from the darkness and strove to bring the path of Shinto to us all.' 'Verses 1-6, Roots Of The Warrior Chef'
'And so he rescued the village from destruction, and seeing that they were willing, his High Priestess gave them the template of His first monastery. Those who entered shed their old lives, and committed themselves to a life of hard-battles, procurement of secret recipes, and the making of feasts for their old families. Those who mastered the art of battle, left the monastery and traveled the lands, until they came across a village where Shinto is needed.' 'Verses 14-17, Branches of Flavor.'
'And he did open his palm and asked them, 'How can you be satisfied with this? For a thousand years you have held onto this recipe and not changed it. For a thousand years you have wasted its potential.' And they did scoff at him, mocking his words. And so the prophet did roll up his sleeves, washed his hands, and went into the kitchen. A mighty battle was waged against the Lord of the Kitchen, but the prophet did win through and gained control of the kitchen. And he created the recipe anew. Stars were born and worlds were created, they claimed as they ate the prophet's creation. And so they cast aside their old beliefs and followed him.' Renovation Verses 52-60
'Yet despite the Shining Greatness of his dishes, His noble Cause was not understood on first sight. A great many unenlightened did believe He was a follower the old ways, and that the old Goddess of the land was His guide. And so he did come to stand before the first of his many Cooking Sages, the one known as the King of Sabasa, and through the First Glorious Dish shared graciously by the High Priestess, started the first of many Enlightenments.' 'Verses 7-13, Light Upon the First Cooking King.'
'The dark knight, a corrupted star who fell from heaven touched what was sacred. And from the sacred, his beast emerged. It had seven eyes, ten horns, eight legs and was made of a boar. His might was great, and the two toghether destroyed the first temple of the south.' Chronicles 3-12.
'And the Prophet came from out of the fire, in the form of a child, innocent and unknowing of the ways of the Holy Kitchen.
'Thou shalt not make a mockery of food nor shalt thee waste it.
'And the high priestess in her arrogance sought to prove her capabilities in the ways of the knife(Kitchen), but she destroyth the holy implement of the savior. In her madness she forsook common sense, be when it returneth , she wept uncontrollably."What have I done" she said in nary a whisper, but the tears shed spoke volumes more.' - Verse 4-12 Fillet
'And the Holy Prophet grasped the Utensils of War, those that Were Always There and looked scornfully at the Sinner before him.
'Many moons after the enlightenment of Sabasa, a great opportunity presented itself amongst the common people. To celebrate the coming of an approaching rain bestowed by the heavens, the master of the castle's sacred grounds had decided to accept other apprentices amongst the common folk.
"And the God of Cuisine sent his prophet to the High Cook. He came to him and said to him,
'And lo to those who believe themselves masters, for brothers and sisters shall together say as the great prophet did: "There is no perfection, only improvement." The brother or sister, suitably chastened, will meditate in silence for three days, feeding only on water and bread. They shall enter the chamber man or woman, but shall leave a true Shinto for in their minds andhearts they know the verse is true. They shall not be met with celebration, but with the dish they found perfect, and they shall say "I can do better"' - Verses 3-7 Rites of The
'And so descended the false deity, come to face the prophet. She who had, for so long, led humankind and monsterkind alike into endless war, wherein even the art of combat was desecrated. She who abhorred the Way.
Verse 1 - Of Linux and Fun Time we had with It:
I guess, to explain my comment too, when I first poked around in linux I was trying to find and edit a particular config file somewhere in a folder. I had a vague idea where it was, and did a search.
My eyes gradually reached maximum width once I understood that I had just fallen into a hall of mirrors hell of recursive search results of infinite copies of the file in infinite hardlinked looped folders. So, as an example:
I was looking for the file sample.bin.
I searched \bin\ for it.
\bin\ contained folders \a\, \b\, and \c\
\a\ contained the file sample.bin and and a folder called \q\
the folder \q\ contained a hardlink to \bin\ - so when you opened \bin\a\q\bin\, you saw \a\, \b\, and\c\.
What this got me for search results was:
and on and on for infinity. I was slackjawed for 30 seconds before I magically spontaneously comprehended the existence of hardlinks by staring at these results, screamed, and tried to halt my CPU's gleeful descent into a bottomless pit. Fun times.
So yeah, for the comparison, world \bin\ might imagine world \a\, world \a\ would imagine world \q\, world \q\might imagine another \a\ or a \bin\ or anything, and if they're similar enough, all the other minor differences that \q\ tosses in would wind up in the first \bin\ and \a\, despite the 'deeper' ones being \q\'s creation. Heady stuff.
1. ''The nature and power of the tailed beasts.
2. "It was our innate love of watching things burn that made our ancestors the terrors of the Ice Age." - Nameless_Flame
3. "There is no word in the human languages for how thoroughly, inescapably screwed you are. There might be one in Eldar, though. They're arseholes like that." - Academia Nut
4. "The power of the Evangelion is like cursing ourselves with awesomeness. We can live just fine without it, the same way the human race has deserved its success with its own pain and suffering and learning from our mistakes, but we can't SURVIVE now without them." - Admiral Yang, Shinji and Warhammer 40000.
5. "Destructive Saviour:
6. "Bpen: "Shinji to be awesome doesn't need to be an asshole. Or be replaced utterly. One simple, simple thing. Just change his childhood. Make him happy. Everything pulls its own weight after that."" - as Per Word Of God.
7. "There's always room for More Dakka." -Me.
8. "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Pirates (Space Edition)
9. "Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain." - Lily Tomlin
10. "War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself." - John Stewart Mill
11. "The only thing worse than someone who thinks there's nothing worth dying for is someone who thinks there's nothing worth killing for; cowards at least have their instincts as an excuse." - Asuka Takami
12. "The conqueror is always a lover of peace; he would prefer to take over our country unopposed." - Karl von Clausewitz
13. "I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones." - Albert Einstein
14. "War is an art, and as such is not susceptible of explanation by fixed formula." - General George S. Patton Jr.
15. "It is well that war is so terrible, or we should grow too fond of it." - Robert E. Lee
16. "War is the most noble and honorable form of murder there is. And it pays better than serial killing, too." - Ken "Snake" Yakata
17. "You cannot simultaneously prevent and prepare for war."
18. "Preparation goes a hell of a long ways toward winning wars, though."
19. "Anyone who truly wants to go to war has never truly been there before!"
20. "In such a world of conflict, a world of victims and executioners, it is the job of thinking people, not to be on the side of the executioners."
21. "I really don't get this one at all. Does that mean that all the smart people are just victims?"
22. "Though we have heard of stupid haste in war, cleverness has never been associated with long delays."
23. "The main difference between being quick and being reckless is whether you win or lose; judgments like that are always made after the fact, I've noticed."
24. "A visitor from Mars could easily pick out the civilized nations. They have the best implements of war."
25. "How will we know when our military arsenal is "good enough"? When our weapons are so effective that wars aren't even worth fighting anymore. There's a reason that there have been no nuclear wars to date, and it's definitely not because people have stopped wanting to kill each other."
26."It is more difficult to organize a peace than to win a war; but the fruits of victory will be lost if the peace is not organized."
27. "You think our job is hard? All we have to do is shoot people and get shot at. Who I feel sorry for are the guys in charge of getting us to stop."
28. "Before I go I got a few things to say. SCREW YOU! Screw you Konoha, screw you Koharu, screw you Homura, let's not forget to screw you Danzou but most importantly SCREW YOU KAKASHI! Thank you all very much for being insufferable jackasses that wouldn't find their way out of a paper bag. So SCREW YOU BITCHES!"
29. “I’m not evil, my boy. I’m just selectively malevolent.” - Ku Lone
30. "I reject your reality, and Substitue my own" - Adam Savage
31. "I feel kinda sexy" - Jamie Hineman
32. "Of course you realize, THIS means war"
33. "You're not making any sense at-tall mate."
34. "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and that's not saying much for you."
35. "You ain't never had a friend like me."
36. "Jocks think having fun is playing football, getting drunk and fing a girl. Nerds think having fun is playing Team Fortess 2, getting some Mountain Dew, and watching Haruhi screw with the world. Doesn't take a genuis to figure out which one i like."
37. "The problem isn't convincing Naruto that Itachi is a pirate. The problem is convincing him that Kakashi isn't."
38. "You see children, unlike the Legendary Sucker Tsunade, whose luck is always in the pits when it comes to gambling unless something bad is about to happen, MY luck is like an unstable blind chipmunk on many, many drugs, meaning that one moment everything could be going my way, and the next I am being seduced by three overweight transvestites, oddly all named Bob, while tied up in a makeshift dungeon in one of their basements… only to escape seconds later, get them arrested and unknowingly gain a massive award for the aid in capturing three notorious rapist criminals. The lesson of the story children is that it is surprisingly difficult to find an overweight transvestite named Bob." - Ghost from 'Yet again with little extra help' by Third Fang
39. "And ya know' something, kid... We all gotta earn our own ihappy ending!"
40. "So which side are we rooting for here?"
41. "The truly legendary pranks were so astounding that simply telling stories about them was grounds for either exile or immediate termination. Naruto actually made himself a medal and certificate signifying that he is the only being to ever get kicked out of the Warp because he was a bad influence on the inconceivable horrors from beyond the veil." - The Big Book of Loops
42. "A thousand promises, all broken within you.
43. "Hebi-teme's a wannabe child molester, and apparently Tsunade-chan lusts after little boys and other women (though it DID explain why he'd never had a chance with her)." He looked up in consternation. "Fuck's sake, I'M the most normal one of us?"
44. "Gentlemen! It has been said I like explosions.
45. "The Imperium of Mankind exists in a universe wherein it is possible to doom an entire planet by masturbating too hard. Do the Minbari exist in a similar universe?"
46. "Being a Choosen One is not the safest occupation around."
47. A quote about the 40k universe sums it up:
48. "Still, if you need things broken in a hurry, there is no better ace to have in your back pocket than a firehouse connected to ten billion gallons of fuck you." - Naruto from 'Never Free' by Lord Raine
49. "In case you haven't noticed, I really don't like the Snake Sage. I'm not sure why. Either it's because he fucked up my life, turned Sasuke into a psychopath manchild, murdered my grandfather, declared war on my home, tried to assassinate my father, and convinced war orphans that he was a good guy so he could experiment on them in his fucked-up quest for immortality, or it's his choice in aftershave.
50. "Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with mustard."
51. "Abandon your fear. Look forward. Move forward and never stop. You'll age if you pull back. You'll die if you hesitate." - Zangetsu to Ichigo from Bleach
52. "The civilians are not for level grinding."
53. "We are Chaos. Raise your shields and give us a good fight. We will sacrifice your souls to our gods. Your culture will burn. Resistance is amusing." - The Chaos Undivided warship Stiletto to U.S.S. Enterprise from 'The Open Door' by Academia Nut
54. "That man [Batman] won't quit so long as he can draw breath. None of my teammates will. Me? I've got a different problem. [Punches Darkseid through the wall] I feel like I live in a world made of cardboard. Always taking care not to break something, to break someone. Never allowing myself to lose control, even for a moment, or someone could die. [Punches Darkseid again] But you can take it, can't you, big man? What we have here is a rare opportunity for me to cut loose, and show you just how powerful I really am." Superman just before uncorking an assbeating of a lifetime on Darkseid, reaffirming that he is indeed a bad mother f'er - Justice League Unlimited.
55. "Men choose darkness not because it is evil. Men choose darkness because in light they found only despair. - James D. Fawkes.
56. "When a politician opens his mouth, he might speak a thousand words and say nothing. The speech of a politician is all lies, misdirection, finger-pointing, and campaigning. Always question your government (or rather, the people who run it), for it is in complacency that tyranny and corruption are allowed to fester. After all, 'all that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.'" -James D. Fawkes
57. "Beams...are so unisex." - Neko-Arc Chaos, 'Carnival Phantasm'
58. "I... see," said Harry, as he trod through the halls of Hogwarts after Professor Quirrell, following him toward the Defense Professor's office. "So my chant, the way I wrote it, implies that the Outer God, Yog-Sothoth -"
59. "My paladin's battle cry is not "Good for the Good God" - parody on Khorne Bersercers battle cry.
60. "Blood is thicker than water, and much tastier" - Anonymous vampire.
61. "Drink my blood and live forever!" - another, somewhat more famous vampire.
62. "Still round the corner there may wait, a new road or a secret gate." - J.R.R. Tolkien
63. "Fly, you fools!" - Gandalf
64. "Rincewind had been generally reckoned by his tutors to be a natural wizard in the same way that fish are natural mountaineers." - Terry Pratchett, 'The Light Fantastic'.
65. "Gravity is a habit that is hard to shake off." - Terry Pratchett, 'Small Gods'.
66. "Not all who wander are lost" - J.R.R. Tolkien.
67. "Those who fear the darkness have never seen what the light can do." - Magic: The Gathering.
68. "Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it." - Reaper Man, Terry Pratchett
69. "Wizard's Second Rule: The greatest harm can result from the best intentions." - Terry Goodkind, 'Stone of Tears '.
70. "To be forgotten is worse than death." - Freya, Final Fantasy IX.
71. "If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals." - Sirius Black, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
72. "Great leaders are not those who seek great power, but rather, those who have great power thrust upon them." - Worf, Star Trek DSN.
73. "It does not do to dwell on dreams, and forget to live." - Harry Potter and the Philospher's Stone.
74. "The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution." - JK Rowling, 'Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone'.
75. "What's the point of living if you can't feel alive?" - Vivi, Final Fantasy 9.
76. "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you, half as well as you deserve." - Bilbo Baggins, The Lord of the Rings.
77. "Even the smallest person can change the course of the future." - Galadriel, the Fellowship of the Ring.
78. "To the well organized mind, death is but the next great adventure." - Albus Dumbledore.
79. "People who want happy endings have to write their own." - Paine, Final Fantasy X-2.
80. "All The people and friends that you have lost, or the dreams that have faded, Never forget them." - Yuna, Final Fantasy X.
81. "Strength without determination means nothing. Determination without strength is equally useless." - Magus, Chrono Trigger.
82. "Looking up too much makes you lose perspective." - Bugenhagen, Final Fantasy VII.
83. "What do you despise? By this are you truly known." - Frank Herbert's Dune.
84. "The existence of tricks does not imply the absence of magic." - Bernard Cornwell, Excalibur.
85. "We have choices. Some people like to stand in the rain without an umbrella. That's what it means to live free." - Roger Smith, The Big O.
86. "Torture is such a harsh word. We Inquisitors prefer to call it "active persuasion."" - Lord Inquisitor Maa'lek.
87. "I love the smell of napalm in the morning... Smells like victory." - Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore, 'Apocalypse Now'.
88. "I find your lack of faith disturbing." - Lord Vader.
89. "Holy shit! Naruto is moving up in the world. Luffy and Ichigo can suck it. King of the Pirates and Superhero don't hold much compared to the second coming of God." - Lord Raine.
90. "I am going to LOVE… and TOLERATE, the SHIT out of them." - Usagi Tsukino from "Sleeping with Girls - Volume 2 - Chaos Theory" by Admiral Tigerclaw.
91. "Heh. Just look at me. Here I am; running around, doing something...iii Saving the world, one random act of destruction at a time." - Harry Dresden, winner of Fifth Holy Grail War.
92. "Yes. Demoralizing a high level magic user is almost the same as defeating them. If they don't believe they can win, they won't. Psychology plays a larger and larger factor the higher up you go. In very heavily biased magics, like D&D Vancian magic, it doesn't matter if the mage is afraid or not. A Fireball is a Fireball, end of story.
93. "Newton was the closest real life ever got to a wizard. Tesla was the closest real life ever got to a mad scientist. I love them both dearly for it." - by Lord Raine.
94. "Actually, Tesla was not one of the closest we have ever come to a Mad Scientist, Mad Scientists were the closest fiction ever got to Nikola Tesla." - by parker.
95. "From what I can see, he means THE God, the Creator, The Watchmaker, The Grand Architect, The King Of All, The Alpha and Omega, the dude who can tell even the mightiest Epsilon to Sit Down, and Shut Up." - by parker.
96. "I've been busy." John Moses Browning.
97. “A lot of folk in Avalon likely seem a bit queer to a new arrival such as yourself, but as you’ve obviously figured out, it’s better to just roll with the oddities, as you’ll get used to it eventually. I bring that up on the off-chance that you see either a little purple-haired anemic girl in a frilly old-fashioned dress shelving and writing books, or an orangutan working one of the librarian islands. Don’t stare. They don’t like it.” - Merlin Ambrosius.
98. “When we fought, I saw the full face of war. I saw it in all of it’s atrocities, all of it’s horrors, all of it’s glories, and all of it’s valors. It was a wondrous, terrible, beautiful, painful thing, part of the very soul of humanity. It was a thing that gave birth to heroes and villains, and turned men more mad than sane into legends that would endure the test of time. What could I do but stand in awe? What could I desire but to be a part of it? And when that jeep overturned, when I was lain out on that bed, I could not help but laugh. Such irony, such terrible irony. I thought it was the end. I thought I was being punished for wanting to fight on. I was wrong. I wasn’t being punished. I was being promoted.” - George Smith Patton, 94th Grand General of the Immortal Army of Avalon.
99. “Never again will I wait for my opponent. Never again will I concede. This final plateau is infinite, and I stand at but the far edge of it. The time for waiting has past. None here has need such mercies, has need of such handicaps. Least of all myself.” - Netero, Divine Fist, Enlightened Master.
100. “. . .” - Kenpachi Zaraki.
101. "Roll the dice against the Devil, and turn his own luck against him. Reach beyond Heaven to an even greater glory, and never stop dreaming of what might yet be to come. Purge the Hells, surpass the Heavens, perfect the in-between, and stand in defiance of all that is unjust in these worlds. For we are the Children of the Gods, and these are the games we play. For we are the Authors of reality, and these are the stories we weave." Lord Raine, Bard of Tarot, Knight of the Blue Rose of Sharon, last of the Astumeton.
102. “We lost Earth, you know. It’s gone. Devoured, by one of the Elder Demons. And as long as that abomination endures, no power in the cosmos can bring it, and the people that were on it, back. Wizards and philosophers, seers and sages, they’ve all told us the same thing. Those of us from Earth. Just move on. Forget it. No one has ever managed to destroy one of the First. No man, no spirit, no god, no angel. Nothing. I guess there’s a first time for everything then, eh?” - Vexarian, Immortal Blade, Knight of the Crimson Magnolia, Lord of War.
103. “You stood up for what you believed in, every last of you. You stood in defiance of the tyranny of inaction, the injustice of a stalemate. And in doing so, you made enemies out of damn near everyone and everything else that matters in this world. Sounds like my kind of place.” - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill, Speaker of the People.
104. "Who can feel like a passionate, carefree, nuturing person of stability all at once?" - by Goldenarms.
105. "Dude! You just described Uzumaki Naruto! Throw in a 'boneheaded' and you've got a dead ringer." - by Da-Guru.
106. “I have reached a point in my life in which there are few things I actually care about. I won’t ask to be forgiven for that. My, is it tea time already?” - Higashiyama Yuri, The Proud and Beautiful Silver Lily of the Netherworld.
107. "In this new timeline, Naruto will train harder than anybody else. He will put behind the title of Hokage, even the title of Shinobi. They mean too little. The power of “Hokage” is not enough. The power of “Youkai” is not good enough. The power he will desperately seek; the power he will desperately strive for; is the power to protect those two little girls. To do that, he might need to step on the gods themselves." - Daneel Rush.
108. "Ten days. Just ten short, and at the same time infinitely long, days. But sometimes, ten days is all it takes." - Katsura Kotonoha.
109. "Some say he washed out of Cosmonaut training for going to fast, some say he has tried to strap himself to every Supersonic Missile in the Soviet inventory from Guideline through to Shipwreck... All we know is, he's not the Stig, but he is the Stig's Soviet cousin: MiG." - Jonen C.
110. "There must be something worth living for,
111. "We’re just trying to ease the truth in bit by bit. "I’m kind of sort of maybe a God now" isn’t something you can just work into any random conversation, you know." Asuka Langley Soryu from 'Surrogate of Zero by bluepen.
112. ""Aren't you supposed to be a driver?"
113. "In another part of the world, a certain masked madman growled at his copy of Jinchuriki Rangers Nine.
"Hey!" Madara Uchiha growled. "It's Mangekyō Sharingan! Not Mary-Sue Steal-Again!"" - from Naruto Uzumaki and the Deus Ex Machina no Jutsu.
114. "Indeed. For those who don't know who Yukari Yakumo (or Yakumo Yukari) is, she is The Youkai of Borders. Otherwise known as Yog-Sothoth in a dress and fancy hat." - Robo Jesus.
115. "COME OVER HERE!! I'LL TEAR YOU TO SHREDS!!! - Kurama(Kyuubi no Kitsune) to Namikaze Minato.
116. "Saying you're gonna tear me to shreds isn't gonna make me wanna come over there." - Namikaze Minato answering to Kurama.
117. "Did he just heal out of sheer spite?" - by Gullwhacker on episode 11 of Carnival Phantasm.
118. "Humans are... as we said... how should I put it... They hate giving up... or maybe they are just bad losers. For me, I don't particularly like it much. Well then, Farewell!" - Yoshitsune the Rumble King.
119. "From Hagrid I've got a package of cake-shaped bricks. Needless to say they were disposed of in most timely manner possible." - Harry Potter from 'Profession - Chosen One'.
120. “Subtlety is only necessary for those without the power to otherwise accomplish their goals.” - Uzumaki Naruto from A Certain Nameless Fanfic.
121. "Who hasn't been killed yet?" - Tempus
122. "There are skeletons in there." - DM
122a. "Are they alive?" - Chiru
123. "What be-ist thy alignment?" - Erystelle to Auslin
124. "It's only a baby Tarrasque." - Sargon
125. "What's the cost range?" - Auslin to Bog's clerk
125a. "Anything from 100 gold pieces to your very soul." - Solannus
126. "Why does a Moon Elf worship a sun god?" - Auslin to Solannus
127. "Any helpful or strategic hints before we go into this battle?" - Auslin to Tobias
127a. "Yeah, avoid the sword of soul-sucking!" - Sargon
128. "I check my maps of Faerun for Menzoberranzan." - Chiru
129. "He committed suicide by natural causes." - Sargon, about Tempus aging himself
130. "Aw crap! We have to go through Hell to get there!" - Sargon, looking at the map and seeing that they'd have to journey the Zhentil Keep Dungeon Torture Room, described as "Hell"
131. "Maybe if she's not a virgin anymore, it could save her life." - Erystelle, speaking of the sacrificial virgin
132. "I'm not a clone, dammit!" - Tempus
133. "We've figured out the first level version of Power Word: Kill... the components are a potion of Dragon Control and a red dragon." - Yugar
134. "Are you a were-tarrasque or something?" - R'llathnillarian to Sargon
135. "I got a 96, or a 69, depending on how you look at it." - Andy, after rolling dice
135a. "69 is always better." - Rich
135b. "Yeah, we were doing that the other day but I don't know why." - Jeff
136. "My, aren't we pompous already, Mr. I-Saw-God!" - R'llathnillarian to the newly converted Tempus
137. “I was beginning to get attached to that bear,” He said, more to himself then to anyone else. “I was going to give it wings and turn it strange colors just because.” - Harry Potter from The Master of Death by Ryuugi
138. "Science marches on. Progress is inevitable. Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. Any sufficiently studied magic is indistinguishable from technology. It was only a matter of time until they converged. That's when things got interesting." Leonardo da Vinci
139. "Honestly, Sarutobi was a little flattered by that. How many other Kage had their students make up an entire Ninja village specifically to kill them? None, that’s how many." - from 'And then suddenly Ninjas!' by The Ero-Sennin.
140. "Naruto: "Ero-sennin, wherever you are, mom was a BABE." *thinks about it* "... I'm going to hell." *pauses* "Again.""
141. "We will not gattai the Evas or their pilo- the Eva and the Bolo, as such thoughts invariably lead to transformation sequences." - from 'The Open Door' by Academia Nut.
142. "You start to see the pattern, hear the rhythm of the world."
143. "It was quite evident that even though there were plenty of barriers protecting the outside world from my workshop, my experiments were what required my workshop to have a case of fire extinguishers in a brightly painted red box outside my workshop with several manuals on how to operate them in every language." - Shirou Emiya from 'The Flight of Mad Bomber' by Sage of Eyes.
144. "I think it might have the closest thing I've gotten to commendations really, not even the most foolhardy mages before myself ever forced the Clock Tower to shell out currency for modern equipment." - Shirou Emiya from 'The Flight of Mad Bomber' by Sage of Eyes.
145. "The destruction of that particular workshop was painful, but easily done. The day I heard of my sealing designation I had just-oh-so-happened to be experimenting with some more… lethal combinations of several runes.
'Phosphorous' and 'Hydrogen' for the regular folk or 'Demon Salts' and 'Dry Water' for those who speak Alchemic terms of course.
I actually saw a news report a few weeks into my stay in Shin Tokyo, talking about a extremist left-wing terrorist attack deep in England." - Shirou Emiya from 'The Flight of Mad Bomber' by Sage of Eyes.
146. "Now I only needed to find out the addresses of those who dared to put the sealing designation onto me and I'll be home free…
It would be glorious…
However, before I could lose myself in my grand machinations, something I learned was a familial trait and that I hoped my child would not acquire. Though with the fact her mother is an heiress with an aptitude for taking control and her first teacher was a ruthless king, the chances of the trait staying recessive may have been shot to hell and revived into an eldritch abomination that even most magi would fear." - Shirou Emiya from 'The Flight of Mad Bomber' by Sage of Eyes.
147. "It is impossible, said the doubt. It is dangerous, said the fear. It is unnecessary, said the reason. Do it anyway, whispered the heart."
148. "Never trust anything you can eat." -A draconian proverb
149. "Among the many signs you know you're up against an Epic Caster: They just set water on fire." - Narf the Mouse about yet anouther snippet of 'The Master of Death' by Ryuugi Shiki.
150. "I'm just not cut out for a princess, I'm afraid. Pirating's much more my style." - Faris Scherwiz.
151. "You know you're up against an Epic Fighter when their opening move is to pull Artifacts out of thin air." - Narf the Mouse about Epic Lists.
152. "This is the First Rule Of Spacebattles: The most important factor of any emergent technology is how soon we can kill people with it."
153. "Vanguards can officially, canonically, charge through cover, obstacles, walls, and other people like the Ghost of Christmas Fuck You to deliver a headbutt like a freight train that is also a lightning bolt and a professional boxer." - Lord Raine in a 'Brief History of Mass Effect Vanguards'
154. "I've survived getting shot. By a Reaper." - quoted for awesome fro Com. Shepard by Kelenas.
155. “You’re locked in an inescapable barrier with your teacher, who taught you everything you know, and is already fed up with your asinine shit.” - Sarutobi from 'And then suddenly Ninjas!' by The Ero-Sennin.
156. "“Whatever you’ve got, do it!” Sasuke looked back. Behind them was Konoha, and if whatever that thing was about to do fired, it would hit the village.
Naruto nodded, and broke into a run, straight towards Shukaku, before he disappeared in a body flicker. Shukaku felt something on his nose, and his eyes opened for him to see Naruto standing on his snout, grinning as he pushed his glasses up into place with his middle finger.
“Let’s step out for a moment.” He said. An instant later, Naruto, the Shukaku, and almost all the sand that had pooled around it were gone." - 'And then sudenly Ninjas!' showing the world how awesome Hiraishin is on behest of The Ero-Sennin.
157. "Sasori was certainly surprised. He’d never seen anyone fight off the One Hundred Puppet Performance successfully before, not only that but destroy many of them in the process. Orochimaru didn’t look it, but he was surprised as well, he didn’t think that Sarutobi could pull off such a feat. Sarutobi, definitely not showing it, was surprised that an army of low-level Ninja Monkey Summons could be so useful against puppets. Seriously, who knew?" - 'And then suddenly Ninjas!' by The Ero-Sennin on why it is never a good idea to forget basics.
158. "In ancient days, sorcerers sought to learn the One True Spell that would give them power over all the world and understanding of all magic... The One True Spell was a woman, and her name was Mystra - and her kisses were wonderful." - Priest Halivon Tharnstar, 'Tales Told to a Blind Wizard'.
159. "The white queen is troubled but can't say why. The black queen hates the white and gives the assassin a black coat. The assassin steals upon the white queen. She can't see him gliding through the shadows. The sword screams. The white queen falls. Her city falls. Stones fall in the cavern to crush the soothsayer. The tree burns and thrashes in agony. Branches break. Branches twist and grow together..." - from a vision by the diviner Yaphyll in 'Undead' by Richard Lee Byers
160. "A Human can live whole life in peace with End of the World in his pocket." - TmDagger
161. "On other hand - you can't trust humanity with a particularly heavy rock." - Doomsought
162. "There is no such thing as a voice that cannot reach someone." - Shino, .hack// series
163. "There's only one thing real about this world and that's us! The players! Getting stronger and defeating others! That's the way this game is played!" - Haseo, .hack// series
164. "It is arrogant for one to reject change because it is undesirable. Rejection of change is the rejection of possibilities." - Harald Hoerwick
165. ""Human: "If it's crazy and it works, it's not crazy."
AI: "Humans are the only sophants in the galaxy to have that saying. Everyone else stops with, 'it's crazy.'"" - gladiusone
166. "Pansies." - Night_stalker
167. "All of them." - Face in Night
168. "So humanity achieves more by being suicidal maniac's? I approve." - Gore17
169. "Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing." - SR-71 pilot
170. "SB.com: Our admins can disable hell itself." - The Martin
171. "You can fight like a Krogan, run like a leopard, but you'll never be better then Commander Shepard!" - one nameless anonymous.
172. "If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be called research, now would it." - Albert Einstein
173. "Against Alduin, World-Eater and Bane of Kings, the Dragonborn came as a mortal man. For only men could slay gods." - Lamora
174. "I'm not Superman. So I can't say anything big like I'll protect everyone on Earth. I'm not a modest guy who will say it's enough if I can protect as many people as my two hands can handle either. I want to protect... a mountain-load of people." - Kurosaki Ichigo
175. "Ah, the Extranet. Where the Humans are Humans, the Salarians are Turians, the Turians are underage Quarians - baiting Batarian molesters, the Batarian molesters are underage Quarians - seeking other underage Quarians, the underage Quarians are Specters ... and Geth Infiltrators are college students. We have dismissed that claim." - Jonen C
176. "I'll show all these bastards, Konoha will pay for how it treated me. I'll become the most powerful ninja alive and when they ask me to become Hokage, to lead and protect them, I'll look them all in the eye and say, 'fuck you'." - Uzumaki Naruto from 'Morph' by Kolarthecool
177. "From that day forth...my arm changed...and a voice echoed: 'Power...Give me more power!' And if I become a demon, so be it, I will endure the exile...Anything to protect her!" - Nero, Devil May Cry 4
178. "Where other men blindly follow the truth, remember, nothing is true. Where other men are limited, by morality or law, remember, everything is permitted. We work in the dark, to serve the light. We are assassins." - Assassin's creed
179. "Let me correct myself. I feel a little bit dirty looking at your body." - Koyomi Araragi
180. "Rejoice human! We have been in the presence in the Sky Mother when she was pissed and remain alive and unmaimed! I'm so happy I feel like I just killed an entire town of humans!" - Ichibi no Shukaku from 'Yet again, with a little extra help' fic by Third Fang
181. "UNIX: It's also probably the only OS that came into existence specifically because a bored programmer wanted to play a game." - TvTropes
182. ""Windows 95 and Mac OS are products, contrived by engineers in the service of specific companies. Unix, by contrast, is not so much a product as it is a painstakingly compiled oral history of the hacker subculture. It is our Gilgamesh epic.
183. "To be The Best - it does not mean to always only win." - some motivational song
184. "Magical Ranking:
...Rank 3 = You can cast True Magics, accidentally kill you own army, use magical WMD as a bowling ball."
185. "I did not know gods had such a blanket immunity in DnD, as they most definately do not have it in Exalted. Not even machines are outright immune to sufficiently potent social dickery." - Hazard
186. "As great as this meal is looking to be, I think you've moved past your skill in cooking and moved onto the Angel's at this point..." - Tohsaka Rin from 'Dissonance Record' Omake.
187. "Didn't I read somewhere about a Paladin succubis? So does that count as a magic change?" - Gore17
188. "That sound's like a cabal of high level wizards plus their assorted apprentices making a bet with a Cleric while drunk, and deciding to go through with it." - Doomsought
189. "After a couple of chapters, it became implicit that those reasons for joining Akatsuki ("because I wanted to") were just their ways to say "Not your f*ing business" to whoever asked. Deidara was forced to join because he lost to Itachi. Pain wanted global peace, his motivations for joining Akatsuki were to promote peace, protect the people and be with his friends and his motivations for turning Akatsuki into a ring of psychotic S-class nuclear-happy terrorists-for-hire were vengeance and world peace by nuclear threat. Konan was following Pain. Itachi was keeping tabs on them all. Sasori needed some shelter after his status in Suna was compromised due to him killing the Kazekage. Hidan wanted to spread Jashinism and learn about immortality from Kakuzu. Even Tobi had stronger reasons than just being bored. Orochimaru joined because he was after Itachi's body and a great deal of his atrocities was just part of a bigger Gambit Roulette, his real reasons, after some digging, turning out to be him wanting to see his parents again. Kisame is the only one, who looks to be there because he felt like it. And even he turned out to want a world without lies." - TvTropes, On Blue and Orange Morality, Naruto section.
190. "I see the Turians being in DEEP shit. The humans were content just to sit back and be left the fuck alone... and the turians pretty much kicked the sleeping bear in the nuts.." - PsyckoSama
191. "Whoever stated that dead men tell no tales clearly wasn't a necromancer." - tzeench
192. "Still, your relatively sure locking someone in place, then sealing their individual peaces into no less then one hundred and eight, separate, sub dimensions is a relatively impressive feat to manage in a single spell." - Stelladextarin the Purple Dragon.
193. "You still can’t believe vampires of all things have ended up kings of the monster world. Even if the local breed are apparently real powerhouses." - Stelladextarin the Perple Dragon.
194. "Behold our power and know despair, Kurosaki Ichigo!" - Nazi Quncies
195. "It's adorable how they think they're actually dangerous." - Kurosaki Ichigo thinks in response to previous post
196. "It amuses me that all of the Quincy higher-ups seem to know exactly how dangerous Ichigo is, and have basically written off everyone in the area as being dead already, even while they cheerfully encourage the cannon fodder to go after Ichigo with a "no, really, you can totally take him." Evilgetsu flat-out admits it's just a stalling tactic to keep Ichigo occupied while they rip Soul Society a bazillion new assholes. They even launched their attack early specifically because Ichigo left for Heuco Mundo.
197. "I think Aizen had the same chance, but he got cocky and blew it dickin' around. If he hadn't played with his food too much, and not wondered around for the fuck of it when he got to the real Karakura, he could have had his shit done with before Ichigo's dad even had a chance to show up, let alone to do the whole time warp training." - whitewhiskey in response to Lord Raine
198. "Aizen screwed up the minute he got the power he wanted. After than, his plans went out the window and he was tripping balls on ascendance. Which also led to him not using illusions and getting his shit wrecked by Gin." - shinzero01 answering to whitewhiskey
199. "Somewhere there is a soulreaper having an aneurism because of us. EVERY time we rip open a hole of Kumon a seated officer is going to be forced to investigate." - Menos Quest on SB.com
200. "My face is threatening to split in two now. Run, little soul reaper, run! Get angry. Also, I now want our Menos to do a jig in front of the reaper just before we enter back into Hueco Mundo..." - Menos Quest on SB.com
201. "Take this! My love, my anger and all of my sorrow! SHIINIIING CEEEROOO" - Menos Quest on SB.com
202. "Turns out having your soul redesigned really really hurts." - Menos Quest on SB.com
203. "Relax guys, the Moon isn't going to be a giant Hollow or anything. Because then you guys would just want to eat it." - Menos Quest on SB.com
204. "Our existence is as mutable and incorporeal as is the morning dew or a flash of lightning" - Nyoronyoden motto
205. "Deranged Exploding Laser Chainsaws on Fire." - an unnamed TSAB Intel Officer when asked to analyse Earth Mages combat potential
206. "I imagine Yuuno's poor ferret heart is about to explode out of his chest! From his perspective everything has just started exploding non-stop, even the explosions are exploding because they can't keep up." - XenonPrime about second 'scrape' between Raziel and his then unnamed 'rival' in ShotaQuest RP
207. "You should know better than to pick up a duck in a dungeon." - unspoken rule of RPG
208. "Bugs Bunny is wise and clever, and would make an excellent Lunar." - Sesif, Radiant Dragon of the West
209. ""Some people[prodigies] will never learn anything for this reason, because they understand everything too soon." - Alexander Pope
210. "I am alive and I am dead. I have a soul and I have none. I have taken countless lives and lived every last one of them. I devour the dead and become their strength, while they become mine. I have destroyed and saved hundreds of worlds. I am sane and have given into madness. I am Blacklight Strain DX-1118. I am Alex Mercer." - badass creed of Alex Mercer
211. "The strong have the right to be condescending toward the weak. Likewise, the weak have the right to tell the strong to stick that condescension up their collective asses." - Alex Mercer
212. "If there is one thing I fear, Shinigami-san...it is neither you nor your domain." - Alex Mercer
213. "Let us see who is superior, the Professor or the Scholar."
214. "Do you know why the pen is mightier than the sword? Because the pen creates the word. But even before words, there are ideas. Ideas, m'boy, are the seeds that grow into worlds."
215. "Afraid? I, the oldest Gorem alive, afraid of a man with a sword and a missing eye? No, I am not afraid of him. I am afraid of his rage. His scream is so horrifying that I must erase it from my mind entirely. That is what I am afraid of."
216. "Like a moth senses motions on the air, so too does the current tell me your movements."
217. "You see, my dear fellow, I was paid by this man to watch his back. I was not yet paid. Nor will I be, seeing as you just killed him. Do you understand the situation? Good. Now die."
218. "Why do I love life? Why do I shy away from being cast in a good light? Because both things were foreign things to me in my youth. The former I took in when I was taken from...that place. The latter, I'm afraid, I am still not used to. Nor, I fear, will I ever be.
219. "Let me give you a bit advice, my boy. Stay away from a Yandere if you want that harem! Trust me, otherwise you'll end with a broken heart and a knife in your throat."
220. "It's like being high, except it isn't!
221. "Whenever I open my eyes, things tend to die." - Xellos
221a. "Of course, if I killed everything, what'll keep me from getting bored?" - Xellos
222. "Huh, I suppose I can't let you die here..." - Xellos to Lina
222a. "Well, I did warn you. Don't hold me responsible for your untimely death." - Xellos to Lina
223. "Silly Ullqiuorra, that's not 'The Heart.' This--" [GANK] "--is it right here, still beating." - Xellos to 'Sad Clown'
224. "The Reapers do not believe in overkill. They believe in eternal overwhelming supremacy." - GreggHL
224a. "You'd think that'd frustrate the Hell outta 'em. The concept of being incapable of understanding something, that is. It's the principle of the matter." - Darth Sonic
224b. "Oh, the Reapers rationalize anything they don't understand as not mattering." - GreggHL
224c. "They would ever be utterly, spectacularly fucked if they met bigger fish." - Maes
224d. "The Reaper's methodology is built around never letting a fish get big enough, though. It's like their art form." - GreggHL
225. "Let's be perfectly honest. Just like Malfeas, there is a reason why the Reapers can get away with that kind of rationalizing: BECAUSE IT WORKS. For millions, billions of years." - Cornuthaum
225a. "Everythingworks until it doesn't. If you're not 1000% prepared for it to fail catastrophically, you deserve to be killed by it. Michael Crichton's fiction in a nutshell. Everything breaks. Have backups. Have backups for the backups. And be prepared to give up and run like hell if all else fails. Skip any one of those steps and Mummy Dearest Nature will kill you and eat you. If you're lucky it will be in that order." - Kalaong
225b. "When the Reapers started taking organics for granted, an anomaly such as Commander Shepard became inevitable." - Kalaong
226. "Yeah. Takes us a while to get any traction, I'll give you that. But! Let's do a headcount, here; The Asari, heirs to the Protheans. The Turians, super soldiers who put the Soldier in the Super. The Krogan, an entire species with breathtaking anger-management issues. The Salarians, an entire species of mad scientists. The Quarians, gadgeteers who can turn school busses into dreadnoughts. The Geth and the Rachni, a couple of hive minds with near-limitless resources. And you, big fella, you've managed to piss off every single one of us." - Tony Stark Shepard
226a. "That was the plan." - Harbinger
226b. "Not a great plan, then." - Tony Stark Shepard
227. "Optimus Prime died for your sins." - Epsilon
227a. "It was good the first time. Then he kept fucking dying." - GreggHL
228. "Considering he joined the military when his bones break like stage glass, Joker probably flies warships because he needs the intense eezo fields to keep his giant balls from dragging on the floor." - Kalaong
229. "It's like she's the lovechild of Tatsuki and Orihime. If it was a ninja. And was raised by Kenpachi." - Lord Raine on Uzumaki Kushina
230. "Anything is possible; especially to those too stupid to realize it isn't!" - Master of Squirrel-Fu
231. "His Exaltation said, “Hereis the point in realspace where the daemons gather in the Warp, but this point five centimeters away is completely different – it's where the Warp is glorious and starry and void of all things and beautiful and Secretive. Right?”
231a. "I think I would make a great Raksha." - linkhyrule5
232. "Nothing we do works!" - a panicked Sidereal
232a. "Quick, try failing!" - another, more optimistic Sid. Pretty much their modus operandy.
233. "Harry was keeping one[vampire] back with combination of force-blasts and judicious use of his shield. He was being sparing with the fire magic, since he was in an old building with people still inside it. Besides, he'd just recently found out that the Sidhe, all three vampire Courts and the younger Wardens were all using his last name as a verb. Apparently, 'to Dresden' meant 'to burn down a building all by yourself without apparently meaning to'. There was also 'to Dresden up', meaning 'to burn down a building all by yourself with disastrous political results'. When four 'nations' and your own allies are making jokes about you, maybe it's time for a little change." - from When Wizards Meet by Shadow Crystal Mage
233a. ""What you do to that boy is sick," Murphy said.
234. "One does not simply walk into Mordor. One struts." - OniGanon
235. "I love Autobot more than any other primordial - he's the ultimate embodiment of every shunned nerd getting his revenge in the most cosmically thorough fashion - but he does need to get whacked on the head with a newspaper (or a goremaul) right now." - Cornuthaum, from ME: Glorious Shotgun Princess discussion thread
236. "One Ramiel is bad. Ten thousand Ramiels is just mean." - Variel
237. "Mad Science" means never stopping to ask "what's the worst thing that could happen?" - Maxim 14
237a. "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a big gun." - Maxim 24
238. "Once you have Enuff Dakka, there is nothing left to shoot; because everything was used up making the dakka!" - Protodermis
238a. "That's not actually Enuff Dakka, so much as it is the Big Dakka, where you take everything and shoot it to make everything again." - Jonen C
238b. "In my headcanon this is now how Orks believe the universe was created." - Random832
239. "Ah, ork political campaigns... Probably the most civilized politics in the multiverse." - AdmiralTigerclaw
240. "To Dresden: to burn down a building[anything/one really] all by yourself without apparently meaning to."
240a. "To Dresden Up: to burn down a building[anything/one really] all by yourself with disastrous political results."
241. "This is why we have never will not have had nice things!" - She Who Lives In Her Name from ME:GSP
242. "Fuck you internal combustion for I'm powered by teenage hormones and ANIME PHYSICS!" - Forgetful about that one Golden Boy episode
243. "Garrus can ride a bicycle with the performance of a lamborghini diablo, driving backwards with one hand steering and the other aiming his sniper rifle at his hundred pursuers. If things get hairy, he ditches the ground and drives on the nearby walls." - on Lunar Ride Charms from ME:GSP DT by Synapse
243a. "And powerlines?"
244. "Some say that his spirit animal form is an E-type Jaguar, and SWLIHN can't affect him because he never speaks..." - about Stig from ME:GSP DT by Variel
245. "Doing an unspecified favor for a Sidereal is never a good idea. Doing an unspecified favor for a Sidereal when you have to win a martial arts tournament in two weeks and you don't have a single martial arts Charm to your name suddenly seems more attractive, however." - Aaron Peori
246. "Autochan is what would happen if Wheatley's incompetance were replaced with perverse genius. Imagine Portal 2, where instead of coming across crippled, badly made turrets, you found turrets that sang memetic kill sounds and had fully functioning reproductive organs. Imagine, instead of pressing a single button in the first puzzle room, that button transported you to Tamriel, where you now accompany the Dovahkiin in a massive adventure while trying to find the exit to the puzzle room, and that second button hidden in the corpse of the World Eater.
247. "Rule one of demonology; never let an uppity git think that just because he has a pair of horns and a pitchfork, he can boss you around. You know what else has horns? Sheep!" – Gnarl
248. "Evil always wins, because Good is dumb. And when you look at your average Brown, that's saying something!" - Gnarl
249. "Who knows what Evil lurks in the hearts of mankind? Well, me. Most of the time it isn't that impressive compared to a brand new Minion, let alone one who's had time to get up to speed and pick up a few shinnies." - Gnarl
250. "Louise, you have to realize that not everyone is nice all the time. Sometimes even I can be a real bitch. But there are people who try to be nice and sometimes fail, and there are people who don't even try. Try to be one of the first type, 'kay?" – Cattleya Yvette La Baume Le Blanc de la Vallière
251. "You're using words, and I know what they mean, but when I look at them together, I get all swirly-eyed." - 00idiot
252. "I was slackjawed for 30 seconds before I magically spontaneously comprehended the existence of hardlinks by staring at these results, screamed, and tried to halt my CPU's gleeful descent into a bottomless pit." - Gloden Lark of Fun Times and Linux
253. "Some call our realm a world of shadows, but that makes it sound unpleasant...The twilight there holds a serene beauty...you have seen it yourself as the sun sets on this world. Bathed in that light, all people were pure and gentle...But things changed once that foul power pervaded our world..." - Midna, after the Mirror of Twilight is restored from 'TLoZ: Twilight Princess'
254. "Whenever there's a meeting, a parting is sure to follow. However, that parting need not last forever. Whether that parting is forever or only for a short time, that is up to you. " - The Happy Mask Salesman from 'The Legend Of Zelda: Majoras Mask'
255. "My son... gives me Helpful Nintendo Hints that are far too complex for the adult mind to comprehend. Here's a verbatim example: "OK, there's Ganon and miniature Ganon and there's these things like jelly beans and the miniature Ganon is more powerfuller, because when you touch him the flying eagles come down and the octopus shoots red rocks and the swamp takes longer." And the hell of it is, I know he's right. " - Dave Barry, describing what may very well be 'Zelda II: The Adventure of Link', "Un Nintended Benefits".
256. "Many games have a story, only one is a legend." - The Legend of Zelda: Collectors Edition
257. "Even if everything in this world is your enemy, I will become your shield." - Nana Mizuki, Pray.
258."Father left me his burning desire. Mother gave me her eyes." - Azumi Inoue, Kimi wo Nosete.
259. "The rabbit is trying to wave in they sky..." - Chata, Dango Daikazoku.
260. "The meaning of my life here... Will be heard in song and thought by someone." - KOTOKO, Koe Ga Todoku Nara.
261. "Connected by this warm wish..." - Minami Kuribayashi, United Force.
262. "I swear to God when I evolve I'm gonna Kill you all." - Anonymous Magicarp, full of world-rending RAGE.
263. "Munchkin: One who, on being told that this is a game about politics and intrigue in 17th century Italy, asks to play as a ninja." - Andrew Rilstone, an 'Assassin's Creed 2' shout-out.
264. "I have been accused of being unrelenting. Merciless. Perhaps I am. For I have looked into that heart of darkness. I know the chill of evil. I have clearly seen that, no matter what, sometimes the night cannot be kept at bay. So I carefully choose my battles. I fight those I can win. And make sure the ones I can't win are worth dying for." - Doctor Strange, Marvel EU.
265. "When - if ever - will the bandwidth of the Internet surpass that of FedEx?" - Johan Öbrink.
265a. "Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon full of tapes hurtling down the highway." - Andrew Tanenbaum, 1981.
266. "Did they add the position because the king's idiot son wanted to play?" - One Extremely Rational Harry Potter, about Seekers and Quidditch.
267. "No! This cannot be! This will not be! I will not let a von Zerbst, of all people, be my downfall! Well know this, Abraham! You could have saved her! But you chose to pursue me even when I damn well gave you the chance to rescue your wife! She was a bitch to the end… but now it’s more true than ever! You heard that howling, did you not? Viktoria von Zerbst… show yourself and kill your fool of a husband! Ah ha ha ha ha!" - Louis de la Vallière, the Bloody Duke from Overlady by EarthScorpion
268. "Curiosity did kill the cat, after all. And unless the cat happens to be the familiar of an epic-level spell caster, even a dragon youngling when acting smart and cunning is quite a bit harder to kill." - SakSak, 'In the Shadow of Zero part 2' thread, of curiosity.
268a. "Ignorance killed the cat, curiosity was framed." - The Unicorn.
269. "To make an analogy:
270. "Oh, Gamesverse. So many collapses. They're standing on the shoulders of so many giants that their heads are brushing the upper atmosphere. Or would be, had most of the giants not tripped one another up, stabbed each other in the kidney and generally fallen over in various different ways, in ages past. So what they're really standing on is a pile of giants' skeletons, some of which have still-spiky bits of ribcage and femur sticking out to gore whoever's currently on top in the ankle.
270a. "Game Theory is not merely a post-apocalypse setting. It's a post-post-post-etc-apocalypse setting, and some occasional post-singularity bits. " - Earth Scorpion
270b. "One of the things that Game Theory has as a major theme is that reality ensues, and that doing something crazy-awesome and insane... is crazy and insane, and doesn't have to work just because it's the hero doing it." - Aleph
270c. "Nanoha showed us that the Monsters of the Week could be a backdrop to the real meat of the plot, the character interaction, but then Madoka came along and showed us that the Monsters can still be legitimately, vividly scary. And Game Theory is very much a post-Madoka story, with the harsher rules and the scarier monsters and so on." - Aleph
270d. "My method for working out (Precia's) plan was basically to carefully consider all the variables she's aware of, and put together a strategy that takes all kinds of factors like those into account, and which could not possibly fail.
270e. "... I cannot tell you how awesome it is that my fic has got people saying that they hope the insane, child-abusing psycho villainess of the first season survives longer, because they want to see more of the character I've made her into. If ever there was evidence that a character reinterpretation has succeeded, I think that would be it. " - Aleph
271. "But mostly? The assorted plans at play here would be going very, very wrong due to the actions of a no-name, no-count, utterly talentless Magus by the name of Shirou Emiya. He had no magic worth mentioning, no combat experience of note, and no plan for or knowledge of the War he was about to enter. He did, however, have one trait that had derailed a countless number of such grand, far-reaching schemes throughout history.
272. "I just don't feel safe anymore. You know? At first it was like a story, and I was the heroine and helping people and saving a little girl's life. But now… everything's complicated, and the TSAB are meant to be good but they're doing bad things, and we're hiding and scared and… It's nothing like it is in the stories. " - Nanoha, describing the story's progression in a single heart-wrenching piece of dialogue.
273. "Whatever naïve innocence had sparked that attitude, it had already been broken. She knew – Heidi could see it – she knew that the world didn't always work like that, the kind of knowledge that came from personal experience. And yet she was trying anyway, determined to prevent a catastrophe by sheer willpower and effort. Heidi shivered. A look like that, the half-hidden hurt and guilt and age, did not belong in the eyes of a nine-year old. Freakish powers, unnatural strength, older than her years and yet still trying to be hopeful… who was this girl? " - Heidi, reflecting on Nanoha
274. "I wish things could have been different. Maybe… maybe in another life… " - Nanoha, during her last conversation with Yuuno.
275. "We need not go to Alhazred, children, because we no longer need them. I… I have rivalled, and possibly even exceeded their accomplishments! The Promethean mechanism I designed was not merely a form of life support like the tank, to keep her in stasis where her condition could not worsen. It was a full revival, bringing Alicia completely and entirely back into the world of the living. " - Precia, doing it thirty-five minutes ago.
276. "No, that was not a native. I refuse to believe that. For crying out loud, she has to be at least AA-rank! And with a Device, to boot. Not to mention the magic she was using - I certainly don't see any Mid-style academies on this world, do you?" - Chrono Harlaown
Kuchiyose: Banshou Tanho [Summoning: All Creation in One Step] Upper C-rank chakra intensive jutsu. Extenshion of Kage Bunshin no Jutsu that allows clone to summon its creator 'into' its current position. In process clone sacrifices clone's existence and returns its remaining chakra(as well as memories) to creator. It is possible to refine jutsu to the point when user replaces clone so seamlessly that for outside observer nothing seems to happen at all.
A D&D Spells Not Worth Memorizing:
20 Bad Lighting
41 Can Trip (And does!)
74 Dalamar's Whoopee Cushion (things that make you go hmmmm)
111 Earthly Chorus
124 Face Grasp
150 Gaze at Reflection
159 Hair Extension I, II, III
173 Illusion Debugger (for Badly Programmed Illusions)
188 Kender Summoning I, II, III
194 Legend Bore
216 Maggot Missle
256 Nahal's Banana Peel (appears under random ally's foot)
260 Otiluke's Happy Fun Sphere
265 Paraphrase Magic
295 Rainbow Enhancer
316 Sepia Cake Sigil
336 Tape Mount
371 Undefined Symbol
378 Vampiric Breathing (perfect for harassing phone calls)
395 You Wish!
396 ZX-Spectral Force
Dresden Alert Levels:
Dresden regained snark: Alert over.
Key of Revelation - Ten bulls of Zen:
1. In the pasture of this world, I endlessly push aside the tall grasses in search of the bull. Following unnamed rivers, lost upon the interpenetrating paths of distant mountains, my strength failing and my vitality exhausted, I cannot find the bull. I only hear the locusts chirping through the forest at night.
2. Along the riverbank under the trees, I discover footprints! Even under the fragrant grass I see his prints. Deep in remote mountains they are found. These traces no more can be hidden than one's nose, looking heavenward.
3. I hear the song of the nightingale. The sun is warm, the wind is mild, willows are green along the shore, here no bull can hide! What artist can draw that massive head, those majestic horns?
4. I seize him with a terrific struggle. His great will and power are inexhaustible. He charges to the high plateau far above the cloud-mists, or in an impenetrable ravine he stands.
5. The whip and rope are necessary, else he might stray off down some dusty road. Being well trained, he becomes naturally gentle. Then, unfettered, he obeys his master.
6. Mounting the bull, slowly I return homeward. The voice of my flute intones through the evening. Measuring with hand-beats the pulsating harmony, I direct the endless rhythm. Whoever hears this melody will join me.
7. Astride the bull, I reach home. I am serene. The bull too can rest. The dawn has come. In blissful repose, within my thatched dwelling I have abandoned the whip and rope.
8. Whip, rope, person, and bull - all merge in nothing. This heaven is so vast no message can stain it. How may a snowflake exist in a raging fire? Here are the footprints of the patriarchs.
9. Too many steps have been taken returning to the root and the source. Better to have been blind and deaf from the beginning! Dwelling in one's true abode, unconcerned with that without - the river flows tranquilly on and the flowers are red.
10. Barefooted and naked of breast, I mingle with the people of the world... My clothes are ragged and dust-laden, and I am ever blissful. I use no magic to extend my life; Now, before me, the dead trees become alive.
Murphy's War Law:
1. Friendly fire - isn't.
2. Recoilless rifles - aren't.
3. Suppressive fires - won't.
4. You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.
5. A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.
6. If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.
7. Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.
8. If at first you don't succeed, call in an air strike.If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.
9. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
10. Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.
11. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
12. If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
13. The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.
14. The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
15. No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.
16. There is no such thing as a perfect plan.
17. Five second fuses always burn three seconds.
18. There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
19. A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.
20. The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.
21. The easy way is always mined.
22. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.
23. Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire... For this reason, it is not at all uncommon for aircraft carriers to be known as bomb magnets.
24. Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.
25. If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.
26. When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.
27. Incoming fire has the right of way.
28. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
29. No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
30. If the enemy is within range, so are you.
31. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
32. Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.
33. Things that must work together can't be carried to the field that way.
34. Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.
35. Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather (and especially during both).
36. Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing.
37. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.
38. Tracers work both ways.
39. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.
40. When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.
41. Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.
42. Military Intelligence is a contradiction.
43. Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.
44. Weather ain't neutral.
45. If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed toward you.
46. Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground. 'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go.'
47. The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.
48. Napalm is an area support weapon.
49. Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
50. B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.
51. Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.
52. Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.
53. The one item you need is always in short supply.
54. Interchangeable parts aren't.
55. It's not the one with your name on it; it's the one addressed "to whom it may concern" you've got to think about.
56. When in doubt, empty your magazine.
57. The side with the simplest uniforms wins.
58. Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.
59. If the Platoon Sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
60. Never stand when you can sit, never sit when you can lie down, never stay awake when you can sleep.
61. The most dangerous thing in the world is a Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass.
62. Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the battle plan.
63. Everything always works in your HQ, everything always fails in the Colonel's HQ.
64. The enemy never watches until you make a mistake.
65. One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many.
66. A clean (and dry) set of BDU's is a magnet for mud and rain.
67. The worse the weather, the more you are required to be out in it.
68. Whenever you have plenty of ammo, you never miss.
69. Whenever you are low on ammo, you can't hit the broad side of a barn.
70. The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.
71. The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
72. Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
73. No matter which way you have to march, its always uphill.
74. If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove anything.
75. For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism (in boot camp).
76. Air strikes always overshoot the target, artillery always falls short.
77. When reviewing the radio frequencies that you just wrote down, the most important ones are always illegible.
78. Those who hesitate under fire usually do not end up KIA or WIA.
79. The tough part about being an officer is that the troops don't know what they want, but they know for certain what they don't want.
80. To steal information from a person is called plagiarism, to steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence.
81. The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is the M60.
82. The perfect officer for the job will transfer in the day after that bill is filled by someone else.
83. When you have sufficient supplies & ammo, the enemy takes 2 weeks to attack, when you are low on supplies & ammo the enemy decides to attack that night.
84. The newest and least experienced soldier will usually win the Medal of Honor.
85. A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
86. Murphy was a grunt.
87. Beer Math: 2 beers times 37 men equals 49 cases.
88. Body count Math: 3 guerrillas plus 1 probable plus 2 pigs equals 37 enemies killed in action.
89. The bursting radius of a hand grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range.
90. All-weather close air support doesn't work in bad weather.
91. The combat worth of a unit is inversely proportional to the smartness of its outfit and appearance.
92. The crucial round is a dud.
93. Every command which can be misunderstood, will be.
94. There is no such place as a convenient foxhole.
95. Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
96. If your positions are firmly set and you are prepared to take the enemy assault on, he will bypass you, if your ambush is properly set the enemy won't walk into it, if your flank march is going well the enemy expects you to outflank him.
97. Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.
98. Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one.
99. The more stupid the leader is, the more important missions he is ordered to carry out.
100. The self-importance of a superior is inversely proportional to his position in the hierarchy (as is his deviousness and mischievousness).
101. There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work.
102. Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the General is watching.
103. The enemy never monitors your radio frequency until you broadcast on an unsecured channel.
104. Whenever you drop your equipment in a fire-fight, your ammo and grenades always fall the farthest away, and your canteen always lands right at your feet.
105. As soon as you are served hot chow in the field, it rains.
106. Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.
107. The seriousness of a wound (in a fire-fight) is inversely proportional to the distance to any form of cover.
108. Walking point = sniper bait.
109. Your bivouac for the night is the spot where you got tired of marching that day.
110. If only one solution can be found for a field problem, then it is usually a stupid solution.
111. No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy.
112. The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map.
113. The problem with taking the easy way out is that the enemy has already mined it.
114. The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.
115. If your advance is going well, you are walking into an ambush.
116. The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.
117. If you really need an officer in a hurry, take a nap.
118. The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.
119. There is nothing more satisfying that having someone take a shot at you... and miss.
120. Don't be conspicuous; in the combat zone it draws fire, out of the combat zone it draws sergeants, if they can see you, so can the enemy... All or any of the above combined.
121. Avoid loud noises, there are few silent killers in a combat zone.
122. Never screw over a buddy; you'll never know when he could save your life.
123. Never expect any rations; the only rations that will be on time and won't be short is the ration of shit.
124. Respect all religions in a combat zone, take no chances on where you may go if killed.
125. A half filled canteen is a beacon for a full loaded enemy weapon.
126. When in a fire fight, kill as many as you can, the one you miss may not miss tomorrow.
127. It is a physical impossibility to carry too much ammo.
128. If you survive an ambush, something's wrong.
129. If you can see the flashes from the enemies' guns in battle, he can see yours too.
130. Flashlights, lighters and matches don't just illuminate the surrounding area; they illuminate you too.
131. Just because you have nearly impenetrable body armor and a hard-ass Kevlar helmet, doesn't mean you don't have exposed areas.
132. There are few times when the enemy can't hear you: When he's dead, you're dead, or both.
133. Never cover a dead body with your own in hopes of looking like you're one of the casualties. Even using his cadaver is a stretch to avoid being shot "just in case."
134. You're only better than your enemy if you kill him first.
135. Never underestimate the ability of the brass to foul things up.
136. You have two mortal enemies in combat; the opposing side and your own rear services.
137. You think the enemy has better artillery support and the enemy thinks yours is better; you're both right.
138. Three things you will never see in combat; hot chow, hot showers, and an uninterrupted night's sleep.
139. "Live" and "Hero" are mutually exclusive terms.
140. Once you are in the fight it is way too late to wonder if this is a good idea.
141. NEVER get into a fight without more ammunition that the other guy.
142. Decisions made by someone over your head will seldom be in your best interest.
143. Sometimes, being good and lucky still is not enough.
144. If the rear echelon troops are really happy, the front line troops probably do not have what they need.
145. If you are wearing body armor they will probably miss that part.
146. Happiness is a belt fed weapon.
147. Having all your body parts intact and functioning at the end of the day beats the alternative.
148. If you are allergic to lead it is best to avoid a war zone.
149. Hot garrison chow is better than hot C-rations which, in turn, are better than cold C-rations, which are better than no food at all. All of these, however, are preferable to cold rice balls even if they do have little pieces of fish in them.
150. A free fire zone has nothing to do with economics.
151. Medals are OK, but having your body and all your friends in one piece at the end of the day is better.
152. Being shot hurts.
153. Thousands of Veterans earned medals for bravery every day, a few were even awarded.
154. There is only one rule in war: When you win, you get to make up the rules.
155. C-4 can make a dull day fun.
156. There is no such thing as a fair fight -- only ones where you win or lose.
157. If you win the battle you are entitled to the spoils.
158. If you lose you don't care.
159. Nobody cares what you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow, what is important is what you are doing -- NOW -- to solve our problem.
160. Always make sure someone has a can opener.
161. Prayer may not help . . . but it can't hurt.
162. Flying is better than walking, walking is better than running, running is better than crawling. All of these, however, are better than extraction by a Med-Evac even if it is technically, is a form of flying.
163. If everyone does not come home none of the rest of us can ever fully come home either.
164. Carrying any weapon that you weren't issued (e.g, an AK) in combat is NOT A GOOD IDEA!
165. As has been noted, "Friendly fire isn't!"
I know what you're thinking... Did I fire six shots or only five? To tell you the truth, I forgot it myself in all this excitement.
This here's a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and it can blow your head clean off. Now, you must ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky?
Well, do you, punk?
Full trace, release!"
"Oh, dear. This has never happened before..."
"I've never Sorted someone who was a reincarnation of Godric Gryffindor AND Salazar Slytherin AND Naruto."
...if the whole thing is enclosed, with just a non-lethal barrier for a floor, it'd end up being balanced on top of the building... Meaning it could tip over if somebody demolished it right...
...then the ninja could just keep rotating the damn thing like a demented, flaming Katamari, all while the inside hosts a Kage-level showdown...
A short snippet on what happens when you cross Battlestar Galactica 2003 and Warhammer 40k:
The invasion of Agra Secundus began. The ships massed over the planet, sending down wave after wave of ships to pacify the small human population. And this is how it was for several months.
Eventually, a small Imperial battle group was alerted to the situation on the planet. Not because the invasion had any great importance. But because the ships were going that way anyway so they might as well stop for a bit to clean it up.
Private Gartz's face was lit up from the red light of lasfire as he sprayed his lasgun into the enemy encampment.
He and a regiment of the Verhoven 468th had arrived with the ships to clean out any ground infestations of the xenos. And there were a lot of them. The xenos had sure been busy!
A few bursts of machine gun fire answered him, woefully off target. The xenos were using primitive slug-throwers, which had a range far inferior to their lasguns. He curled his lip in disgust as what seemed to be a human was mown down, severed in half.
They weren't real humans though. The true xenos, the metal men, had grown them somehow. It was disgusting. Not only did the xenos dare to set foot on a human planet, they went even further by daring to despoil the sacred human form.
Their blasphemy knew no bounds.
Fortunately, Gartz thought as he blew a large hole in one of the metal things, they died easily. Real easily
He turned to Private Constantin beside him.
"When was the last time we actually fought something which died when you shot it with a laser?"
He thought back. Before this, they had helped in cleansing a Tyranid infestation, before that, a small force of Traitor Marines, before that, a fledgling waagh of Orks, before that…
"Actually, I don't think we ever have before now."
Constantin nodded as he blew the head off another Centurion.
The Situation in Hell
The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I go out with you", and take into account the fact that I went out with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct . . . leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."
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