Hello, my gender is female and a woman never reveals her age... its so rude to even ask! SHAME ON YOU!!...My height...4'7"...SHORT PEOPLE WILL RULE THE EARTH...MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!...still have a complex with my height...though...

Oh Yeah! The thing I hate most about fan fiction...are the MARY SUETHORS or the people who writes about those characters who are practically perfect that just popped out of no where and is perfect in every way possible...NO OFFENSE INTENDED for Mary Suethors... I just don't like those story much its a little cliche...for my taste...Not trying to piss anyone off...HOWEVER even though I HATE mary sues I don't dislike all OCs some of them are actually good...

My favorite pairings in PoT (prince of tennis):
Thrill pair...fuji is just so fun to read
Pillar pair...tezuka is cute when he blushes...
Royal pair...two cocky brats...who could resist
and finally OT5 so much drama, so cute!

or maybe i just like reading Ryoma/whatever male character (OC included) (FEMALES ARE SO BTCHY! and ANNOYING! in PoT)

My faovrite pairings in D. Gray Man:
Yullen...they're just so cute
or maybe a threesome...even a foursome...

My favorite pairings in Gravitation:
EirixShuichi...who else is there?!
Maybe a plausible OC...who really needs and Eiri was especially cruel to him!

I'm such a Yaoi fan girl...blushes

You know you live in the year 2007 when...

1) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years.

3) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have MSN or Myspace.

4) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.

6) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9) You were too busy to notice number 5.

10) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11) Now you're laughing at your stupidity.

12) Now you're thinking, "I have to put this on my profile!"

Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, blissfulmeme, AkatsukiReverie,EmoLollipop, Deidara-Kun-Fangirl, KillerLiger3000, moonlit fang, chibi kyuu-chan, Keeper.Of.The.Obsidian.Jewel, HiDiNgFrOmYoU, edenforest1

FAKE VS. REAL

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr./Mrs.

REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn … we really messed up … but that sure was fun!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.

REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it’s yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.

REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.

REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.

REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what’s wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE FRIENDS: Make you say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.

REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore this.

REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it

Her name was Aurora
She was only five
This is what happened
When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic

Her only friend
Was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair

She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound

Until her parents
Unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure

A bruise on her leg
And scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear
And softly cries
She loves her parents
But they want her to die

She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"God, why? Why is
My life always sinking?"

Such a bad life
For such a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did

Then one night
Her mom came home high
The poor child was hit and slapped
As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made

She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest
"You deserve to die
You worthless pest!"

The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying

Police showed up
At the small little house
They quickly barged in
Everything was as quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the sad little girl
Laying on the floor

It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms

Copy and paste this if you hate child abuse!!

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murderer chanted," Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiilling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen Teetering On The Brink Of Insanity Past The Point Of No Return Man Life Sucks, The Poisoned Doughnut of DOOM, outofstategrl, ZombieDragon, redwolfeyes, hamxham, Anime Wildfire, KarasuMurasaki, ActionBitch2011, HiDiNgFrOmYoU

If you ABSOLUTLEY REFUSE to die by suffocating, copy and paste this onto your profile.

My name is Tiffany

I am three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren’t ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can’t do a wrong

I can’t speak at all

Or else im locked up

All day long.

When im awake im all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren’t home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe ill just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie’s bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

I’m so afraid now

I’m starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

He’s already locked it

And i start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"I’m sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

Into a unimaginable shape

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While i lay there motionless

Brawled on the floor

My name is tiffany

I am three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me

And you can help

Sickens me top the soul,

And if you read this

and don’t pass it on

I pray for your forgiveness

Because you would have to be

One heartless person

To not be effected

By this Poem

And because you are effected,

Do something about it!

So all i ask you to do

Is pass this on!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE

On with it!

If you are against child abuse copy and paste this on your profile

I don't suffer from insanity I enjoy every minute of it.

When life gives you lemons... MAKE YAOI!

It takes 47 muscles to frown, 17 to smile but it doesn't take any to sit there with a dumb look on your face.

If you always stop to smell the roses sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.

I am worse than evil... I am the author!

Sorry about being late...I got lost on the path of life.

No you don't get it you think you get it which is different than actually getting it get it?

There are 3 kinds of people, those who make it happen, those who watch it happen and those who don't know what the hell is happening.

People are boring, they are only amusing if you push them down a flight of stairs.

When life gives you lemons make grape juice and let the world wonder how you did it.

I AM NOT CRAZY! My reality is just different than yours.

When life gives you lemons squeeze them in somebody's eyes and RUN!

Uh...define 'normal' for me again.

There are three rings in marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.

It's not incest! It's brotherly love! They're different!

"Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!"

"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings."

""Three blondes are in an elevator when the elevator suddenly stops and the lights go out. They try using their cell phones to get help, but have no luck. Even the phones are out.

After a few hours of being stuck with no help in sight, one blonde says to the others "I think the best way to call for help is by yelling together." The others agree with the first, so they all inhale deeply and begin to yell loudly "Together, together, together.""

Never raise your hand to your children; it leaves your midsection unprotected.

I ran into my ex the other day, then I put the car in reverse and ran over him again.

Life isn't about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away. Like choking.

There are plenty more fish in the sea, but who wants to go out with a fish?

Some people are like a slinky. They have absolutely no use; but you can't help smile, when you see one fall down the stairs.

Due to recent cutbacks and until further notice, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

I lay at my bed last night, counting the stars, and I thought to myself: Where the fuck did my ceiling go?!

Ever notice how DYING is at the end of STUDYING?

When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them.

There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.

I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don't like?

Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked "Brightness," but it doesn't work.

Money can't buy happiness, but poverty can't buy ANYTHING.

That which does not kill me had better run pretty damn fast.

Nothing travels faster than light, with the possible exception of bad news, which follows its own rules

…didn’t need an excuse to go over to the Dark Side…

True Love has no happy ending, because True Love has no ending.

Don't treat others as you want to be treated, treat others as they treat you.

“Is the world coming to an end?”

“No.” Kisame answered, confused.

“Did the leader send a urgent message?”

“No.”

“Did Orochimaru miraculously kill over and everyone is dancing on his rotting corpse?”

“No, but that would be-”

“Then leave me the fuck alone.” -

You laugh at me because I’m different, but I laugh because all of you shitheads are the same.

Don't like my attitude? Call 1-800-KISS-MY-ASS

Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them

Boys: can’t live with em, and it’s illegal to shoot em.

What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?

Smirk, it makes people wonder what you’re up to, while scaring the shit out of them at the same time!

If you act crazy all your life, they'll never be able to commit you

Mental Health is overrated

Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights do make a left

Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one

Me breaking the rules? No. I test their elasticity

A good lawyer knows the law, a great lawyer knows the judge

The road to success is always under construction

I'm looking forward to regretting this

Life is like a pack of chewing-gum; I've yet to figure out why

Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow

If electricty comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Don’t knock on death’s door…ring the doorbell and run. He hates that.

"Sasuke - Those clothes look good on you, they'd look even better on my bedroom floor."

"Tell me. What is it like living in a constant haze of stupidity?"

"Mommy... What're those two boys doing?"

"The more you piss me off, the longer I'll keep you alive."

"If you needed help in killing yourself, you could have asked. I'd be happy to oblige."

English! Who needs that? I'm never going to England!

Can I get your picture? I collect nature disasters

"Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted."

Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss

Who laughs last, thinks the slowest

Curiosity killed the cat...but it didn't do anything to the human, and the monkey got away with murder!

That money talks I don't deny... I just heard mine yell: Goodbye!!

Let's pass around the vodka and get wasted, lets see how many lies you've told in the past

First law of science: don't spit into the wind

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work

Men are like roses, you got to watch out for all the pricks

Behind every successful woman, is a man who is surprised

I don't hate you, I just need someone to take my anger out on

Whoever said nothing's impossible never tried to slam a revolving door

Whoever said nothing's impossible never tried to dribble a football

Virginity is like a bubble... One tiny prick and it's gone (so true...)

If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten

Earth first. We'll screw up the other planets later

Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception

Welcome to loserville. Population: you

Your village called, their idiot is missing

I have PMS and a gun... now what were you saying?

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain

You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely

I dont need your attitude. I got one of my own

Your envy creates my energy, ever wonder why I'm so hyper?

Want my number?Call 1-800-GET LOST!!

"Yes. I had mixed feelings too when I came back from whatever world I had traveled to and read the words my hands had written.” This one is actually mine. From a review reply I wrote to one of my reviewers.

Don't pity the girl with one true friend. Envy her. Pity the girl with just a thousand acquaintances.

We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go, we take a little of each other everywhere.

Nations will rise and fall. Wars will be lost and won. Lives will begin and end, but a true friend is eternal.

~19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity~

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Drugs".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. dont use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

Drink Driving is bad. (Not Mine)

She was drinking at a party
On a raging New Year's Eve
She had to be home early
She knew she had to leave

"Honey do you need a ride"
Her boyfriend sweetly said
She just smiled back at him
And quickly shook her head

"I've got to leave right now
So I'll just take my car...
But don't you worry, sweetheart
Cause I won't drive too far"

Unaware she'd been drinking,
He watched her drive away
She knew that this was wrong
But she did it anyway
"I only had a couple drinks
I know that I'll survive"
She kept saying in her head
As she went for this short drive

The alcohol took over her
She wasn't thinking straight
She assumed that there was no one
Who'd be driving out this late

She ran all of the stop lights
As she sped along the road
Never thinking of the pain
This night would soon behold

But out of nowhere, came a car
She screamed as headlights flashed
She flew out of the windshield
As both of their cars crashed

She woke up laying on the ground
Sirens screaming in the night
She was bleeding quite a bit
But she knew she'd be alright

With dread, she saw the other car
That had rolled down the hill
She knew this was her fault
As she started feeling ill

But when she saw the body
Tears started falling down
As she looked down to find
Her dead boyfriend on the ground

Drink Driving again Not Mine again...

I went to a party
and remembered what you said;
You told me not to drink, Mum,
So I had a sprite instead.
I felt proud of myself,
the way you said I would;
That I didn't drink and drive,
though some friends said I should.

I made a healthy choice,
and your advice to me was right;
The party finally ended,
and the kids drove out of sight.

I got into my car,
sure to get home in one piece;
I never knew what was coming, Mum,
something I expected least.

Now I'm lying on the pavement,
and I hear the policeman say;
The kid that caused this wreck was drunk,
Mum, his voice seems far away.

My own blood's around me,
as I try hard not to cry;
I can hear the paramedic say,
"this girl is going to die".

I'm sure the guy had no idea,
while he was flying high;
Because he chose to drink and drive,
now I would have to die.

So, why do people do it, Mum,
knowing that it ruins lives?
And now the pain is cutting me,
like a hundred stabbing knives.

Tell sister not to be afraid, Mum,
tell daddy to be brave.
And when I go to heaven,
put "daddy's girl" on my grave.

Someone should have taught him,
that its wrong to drink and drive;
Maybe if his parents had,
I'd still be alive.

My breath is getting shorter, Mum,
I'm getting really scared;
These are my final moments,
and I'm so unprepared.

I wish that you could hold me Mum,
as I lie here and die;
I wish I could say "I love you Mum!"
So I love you and goodbye.

Remember: NEVER drink and drive!

DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE! If you too are against drunk driving, add this to your profile and add your name to the bottom.

~NoOnesGal1848, Sakura-Cherry-Blossom-Chan, AkatsukiDreamer, aussie_girl1990, animeprincess619, SasukeUchiha911, Fujin Chan, edenforest1

Forget (Not Mine either!)

Forget his name, forget his face,
Forget his kiss and warm embrace.
Forget the time you spent together.
Forget it all he is gone forever.
Forget the fact that he once cared,
Forget the love that he once shared.
Forget his love that once was true,
Remember now there is someone new.

Forget you cried all night long,
Forget him when they play your song.
Forget how close you once were.
Remember how he chose her.

Forget you memorized the way he walked.
Forget the way that he talked.
Forget the times he made you mad
Remember how he made you feel so sad.

Forget the thrills when he said, "Hi!"
Forget the times he made you cry.
Forget the way he said your name.
Remember now he is not the same.

Forget you saw him yesterday.
Forget his gentle and teasing way.
Forget the things you had planned to do.
Remember now he is not with you.

Forget the times that went so fast.
Forget it all it is in the past.
Forget he said, I'll leave you never.
Remember now he is gone forever.

Forget the past that I once knew.
Forget it all leave it too.
Because he no longer loves me...
….He loves you.….

Unspoken love (Not mine also)

She'd known him her entire life
She always dreamed to be his wife
Just his smile made her heart melt
But she never told him how she felt

Forever hoped to have him here
Always dreamed to hold him near
Time passed and they both did grow
But still she never let him know

Perfect chances passed her by
But she just couldn't tell this guy
No matter what she'd ever do...
He still didn't have a clue
But one day her whole world did end
When she heard news from a friend
About the wreck he'd gotten in...
She'd never see his smile again

Now at his grave she softly cries
The tears running from sad eyes
This hurting girl whose heart is broken
All because of love unspoken

Stupid Racist People...

A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
The white man said, "Coloured people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black."
"But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you grow up you're white,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple."
"And yet you have the nerve to call me coloured"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

Copy this onto your site and help stop racism!

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

It's always the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it?

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back.

When you're down I may not be able to pick you back up, but I promise I'll be willing to lay down right next to you.

You don't die of a broken heart...you only wish you did.

Sticks and stones may scar my skin but words slice through my soul within.

It's not until you're broken that you know what you're made of.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.

Guys should be like lattes-rich, strong, and hot.

A friend is the best weapon you can have in a battlefield.

Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days."

Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up.

Lets flip a coin-heads we'll be together, tails we'll flip again.

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Why are the Force and duct tape the same? Both have a light and dark side and hold the universe together.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

Procrastination isn't the problem; its the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off!

We use 10 percent of our brains. Imagine how much we could accomplish if we used the other 60. (If you don't get this, I'm sorry for you.)

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend laughs at you and trips you again.

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you, but a best friend will go up to him and say "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

Don't run in the halls, gliding is more fun!

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice and I'll kill you.

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

If it works, rip it apart and find out why.

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

There are very few personal problems that can't be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.

Never say 'Things couldn't get any worse.' God takes that as a personal challenge.

It's people like you that make people like me need medication.

Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.

People say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

When in life you fall down, do not look for the problem where you landed. Look for the problem at where you tripped.~Ancient African Proverb

Courage is not the absence of fear. No, courage is the realization that there is something you find more horrible than fear.-Unknown

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that ?

Fear can prevent people from making the hugest mistake of their lives...but it also can prevent them from making the best choice.

It is not a human’s power that rules the world; it is a human power that destroys it.

If a missing person sees their picture on a milk carton that offers a reward, would they get the money?

Why do people say, "You can't have your cake and eat it too"? Why would someone get cake if they can't eat it?

Work vs Prison

IN PRISON... you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.
AT WORK... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.

IN PRISON... you get three meals a day.
AT WORK... you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it.

IN PRISON... you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK... you get more work for good behavior.

IN PRISON... the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
AT WORK... you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself.

IN PRISON... you can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK... you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON... you get your own toilet.
AT WORK... you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat.

IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family.

IN PRISON... all expenses are paid by the taxpayers with no work required
AT WORK... you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.

IN PRISON... you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.
AT WORK... you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.

IN PRISON... you must deal with sadistic wardens.
AT WORK... they are called managers.

So why is it, again, that we work?

What makes life 100 percent?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100 percent? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants more than 100 percent. How about achieving 103 percent? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

then:

H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98

K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96

but:

A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100

and:
B U L L S H I T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103

So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close,
attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you over the top.

And look how far this will take you...

A S S K I S S I N G
1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118

Think about it... and have a nice day at work... :)

／l、
（ﾟ､ ｡ ７
l、 ~ヽ
じしf,)ノ

Yaaaay kitty!

This is Kitty. Copy and paste Kitty into your
signature to help him gain world domination.

DANG MY PROFILE'S SICKENLY LONG...I PRAISE WHOEVER GOT THROUGH THIS RANDOM SHT OF CRAP~! not that I'm saying my profile is crap...just saying..."even I don't think I have the time and effort to go through this..."