JKR: There was once a plucky orphan boy called Harry Potter who was raised by crummy relatives, had a dirty-playing school enemy, a dead godfather, a bastard teacher who gave him hell, the burden of saving the world on his shoulders, a romantic rival who died on his hands, and any of a hundred reasons for bestselling adolescent angst.

Earthwalk: Boo-hoo. Wait, what about the bastard teacher who gave him hell?