hi! I'm I lov Puck

A few of my FAV things are writing, dancing, drawing/painting, hanging out withs friends and playing violin. in Sept I will have been playing for 7 years.

Name: I bet you'd like to know

School: Home schooled.

Hair: Long brown.

Eyes: Brown.

Age: I'll give you a hint, I'm between 12 and 16.

Fav food: IDK, but nothing meat, I'm a vegetarian.

Fav dessert: ICE CREAM! I LIVE FOR ICE CREAM!

Fav

"I'm not suffering from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it."

"Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have the film."

"The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do."

If you secretly wished for a Hogwarts letter when you were 11, copy and paste. (I actually pranked my friend! Me and my sis copied it word for word form the book, then mailed it 2 our friend, she didn't believe it, because we forgot to write it in green ink...lol )

If your so obsessed with something that you can quote it word for word, and do at random moments, copy and paste.

If music is in your soul, copy and paste.

If you want to play Quidditch so bad, copy and paste.

Remember

1.) Do not use an axe to kill a fly on your friends' head.

2.) Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

14.) Oh god! They took my freaking kidney!

19.) "Some people are like Slinkies. They're really good for nothing. But they still really bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs."

Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. Either it's my mom or my dad. Or my older brother Collin. Or my other brother Ho-Chan-Chu. I think it's Collin.

Guns don't kill people. I do.

My imaginary friend doesn't like you either.

32.) The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

34.) Assassinations is an extreme form of censorship.

I'll be rich and famous when I invent something that will stab people over the internet

39.) Somebody needs a Happy Meal.

42.) Please Note: CHRISTMAS IS CANCELED Apparently you told Santa that you have been good this year...he died laughing.

46.) I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you.

Although, chainsaw beats scissors, paper, AND rock!

If Tylenol, Duct Tape, & a Band Aid can't fix it, you have a serious problem.

Would you like a cookie? So would I.

56.) You don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy running from the bear.

57.) Well the voices and I took a vote. It's unanimous; you suck.

58.) A day without sunshine is like... night.

59.) A rejected invention:Instant water! just add water!

61.) Don't make me mad...I'm known to bite at random!!

65.) I put the 'fun' in 'dysfunctional'.

68.) If you wish on a falling star it might come true... Unless it's a meteor hurdling to earth... Then no wishes come true... Unless your wish was to be killed a meteor hurdling to earth.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

America is a free country. Of course, you can't get that freedom untill you are eighteen, but that's okay, because when you do turn eighteen, you get a bunch of privlieges, like doing jury duty, paying taxes, and paying off bills...

A stranger will stab you in the back, a friend will stab you in the front, a boyfriend will stab you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.

Be a loser! Because being cool is so overrated!

Remember what you just said, because tomorrow I am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be devastated then!

I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not.

My favorite word is sarcasm.

"I know water doesn't bite! What a stupid thing to say! Water doesn't have to bite you! You drown in it you moron!"

It's all fun and games until the other person loses their sanity.

I've got things to break, people to laugh at, objects to drool over and who knows what else.

Guys should be like lattes-rich,strong,and hot

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

At the start of your life, you will be awarded a lifetime supply of air. Use it wisely.

I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

When I say LOL I'm not laughing out loud. I just have nothing better to say.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

"Wal-Mart, do they like, sell walls there?"

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

The dark side has cookies, but we have pie. Blueberry, to be exact.

Be who you are and say what you feel for those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind

Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved problems?

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

Education is important. school however, is another matter.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic...

"Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"

Why do people say, "You can't have your cake and eat it too"? Why would someone get cake if they can't eat it?

Don’t mess with me, I've got a stick

A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.

If you can stay calm when all around you is complete chaos, you probably haven't fully understood the situation.

Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.

People like you are the reason why we have middle fingers.

When life gives you lemon, throw them back and tell life to make its own dang lemonade!!

When life gives you lemons, throw it in the trash and tell life you'd rather have money.

My mind works like lightning...one flash and then it's gone.

1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you.

there are 3 kinds of people in this world. those who can do math and those who can't.

dont worry about the people in your past, theres a reason they didnt make it to your future.

How To Annoy People
At An Amusement Park

Dress up like one of the photographers and follow people around asking them repeatly if they would like their picture taken.

Leave large gaps in between you and the people in front of you while waiting in line.

Every time you pass a chain restraint not in use, clip it on and use it to hold back the people behind you in line.

Ask the person running the roller coaster if someone has recently thrown up on it.

Pretend to freak out on a ride so they stop it to let you off.

Offer people money for their spots in line...MONOPOLY money.

Speak in Spanish, or pretend you're deaf and start making rapid hand movements.

Start talking about shaving your excess body hair in line while everyone around you is silent.

Find someone and tell them you're lost. Use your best acting skills.

Steal all of the pennies out of the water fountains.

Go up to the boy band wanna-be group and pretend to be really excited and ask for their autographs, reassuring them that they're gonna make it big soon.

Take an Alka-Seltzer tablet and begin to have spasmatic movements in your body while foaming at the mouth at the very top of the tallest ride.

Ask the ride attendant if you cannot ride because you are under the influence of herione, marijuana, crack, and every other drug you can think of.

Begin to cry when they start the merry-go-round and have them stop it because you're too scared to go all the way.

Start talking loudly about the last time you got stuck upside-down on this ride, scaring everyone in line around you.

Ask someone that looks like they're in a hurry for directions.

Complain about how dirty the seat is, and demand they clean it off.

Walk up to anyone in the park, and say "Hi, my name is your name" and offer a handshake.

Ask ANYONE for their autograph.

Advertise for a theme park...one you're not at.

Find someone to tell your life story to.

Whisper right in someone's ear, "I know what you did last summer."

Comment how good you look in every picture of you on a ride.

Make fun of everyone else in every set of pictures taken during the rides.

Go up to every character walking around and give them a big hug and call them your "hero."

Ride every water ride and inform everybody with you that you can't swim and everyone's gonna drown.

-x-x-x-x-

Ways to Annoy people at the movie theater:

Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"

Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.

Clap when the good guy gets killed.

During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"

Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"

Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.

Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.

Yell out what is going to happen.

Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.

Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.

Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.

Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.

Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.

Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.

Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.

Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)

Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.

Try to start a wave.

Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.

Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.

Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"

Sing with the theme music.

Bring and use your own air freshener.

At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."

Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.

Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.

Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.

Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"

Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.

Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen.

Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.

When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"

Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.

Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"

Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.

Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.

Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"

Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.

Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.

Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.

Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.

Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room.

Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn.

Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!"

Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!"

Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"

Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can hear it, like when the killer's name is going to be said.

Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.

Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.

Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.

Pass by a room that's showing a movie you've already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the end

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Having the love of your life say, "we can still be friends", is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

The dinosaurs extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.

Its not until you're broken that you know what you're made of.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

People say "Guns don't kill people, People kill people!" Well, I think guns help. If you stood there and yelled Bang, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eyes.

When life give you lemons, make apple juice and let the world wonder how you did it.

Everyone has a wild side--me and my friends just prefer to make them public.

EMO=Extravagantly Made Oragami

Labels are for cans. And in case you haven't noticed--Im not a can.

Normal is just a setting on washing machines.

When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns...but the bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all goth again

PONDER THIS

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk, I have a work station..
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why do so many old people eat at cafeterias?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?

Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numerals?

(x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking.

(x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking.

(x) You have run into a glass/screen door.

(x) You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.

(x) You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.

~total so far= 5~

(x) You have run into a tree.

(x) It IS possible to lick your elbow

(x) You just tried to lick your elbow.

(x) You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star have the same rhythm.

(x) You just tried to sing them.

() You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.

(x) You have choked on your own spit.

() You have seen the the Matrix and still don’t get it.

(x) You didn’t notice that in the last question “the” was spelled twice

(x) You just looked at it.

() Your hair is blonde/dirty blonde/has blonde in it.

() People have called you slow.

~total so far= 13~

() You have accidentally caught something on fire

() You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes/cheek.

(x) You have caught yourself drooling.

() You’ve fallen asleep in class

() If someone says “fart” you laugh.

() You just laughed.

~total so far= 14~

(x) Sometimes you just stop thinking

(x) You tell a story and forget what you were talking about

() People are often shaking their heads and walking away from you

() You are often told to use your “inside voice”.

() You use your fingers to do simple math.

~total so far= 16~

() You have eaten a bug.

(x) You are taking this test when you should be doing something important

(x) You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn’t realize it

(x) You’ve looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand, pocket, head, etc.

~total so far= 19~

() You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don’t even when you know it won’t happen to you.

() You break a lot of things.

() Your friends know not to use big words around you

(x) You sometimes tilt your head when you’re confused

(X) You have fallen out of your chair before

(x) When you’re lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling

PONDER THIS ALSO!

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.

98 percent of teens can walk without running into walls. If you're in the 2 percent that can't, post this in your profile.

98 of the internet population has a Myspace. If you're part of the 2 that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!!

Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

There was a blonde who found herself sitting next to a Lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer just kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence. Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, and said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions, she owed him 5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her 50. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?"

Without saying a word the blonde handed him 5. then the blonde asked, "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?"

Well, the lawyer looked puzzled. He took several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde 50.

The blonde put the 50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, "What is the answer to your question?"

Without saying a word, the blonde handed him a 5.

Forever isn't as long as it use to be.

My knight in shining armour turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Before you critisize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door.

An apple away keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

You're intoxocated by my very presence

Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

Life was so simple when boys had cooties

I stay as confused as a gangster with a skateboard

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

I ran with scissors, and lived!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor

Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days"

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

Your eyebrows are as beautiful as an enormus caterpillar.

When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

My friend's the kind of person that breaks the silence at a funeral by screaming "KUNG POW CHICKEN"

I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

Fergie taught me how to spell delicious and glamorous. But not so much tastey!

P.S I never changed, I just got tired of pretending I was happy.

-Did you just call me a bitch? Well a bitch is a dog, and dogs bark, bark is on trees, trees are part of nature, nature is beautiful. So yeah, thanks for the compliment.

-BRB, I'm busy trying to jump off the roof with the kitchen broom.

-Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS

-BE nice to losers. one day they might be cool!

- There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

-Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. -

- What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'

- "Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss."

- Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

- You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.

- A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

- Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.

- The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

- He who laughs last didn't get it.

- When there's a will, I want to be in it.

-Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself

-The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.

- When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

-Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

- I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

- Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.

Spell out yer N-A-M-E and see what it means.! :
A: hot
B: loves people
C: good kisser
D: makes people laugh
E: Has gorgeous eyes
F: people wild and crazy adore you
G: very outgoing
H: easy to fall in love with
I: loves to laugh and smile
J: is really sweet
K: really silly
L: smile to die for
M: makes dating fun
N: can kick the socks off of you
O: has one of the best personalities ever
P: popular with all types of people
Q: a hypocrite
R: good boyfriend or girlfriend
S: cute
T: very good kisser
U: is very nice
V:not judgmental
W: very broad minded
X: never let people tell you what to do
Y: is loved by every1
Z: can be funny and dumb at times

Some funny stuff...

Being mature is overrated.

Being weird is like being normal, only better.

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.

Boys are like Slinky's... useless, but fun to watch fall downstairs

There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is full.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

When you get caught looking at him just remember he was looking back.

One day, will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.

I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?

As you make your way through this hectic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day. At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver

Make a man a fire, keep him warm for a day. Set a man on fire, keep him warm for life

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world wonder how you did it.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk

I'm not littering...I'm donating to the Earth

I've got A.D.D and magic markers, oh the thrills I will have! ( I don't really have ADD )

Life is like a pack of gum... I've yet to figure out why.

Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hates that.

Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out

Last night I looked up at the stars and matched each star to a reason I loved you. I was doing fine till I ran out of stars.

To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff

It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it?

Person #1: Happiness is just around the corner!
Person #2: Too bad the world is round!

Growing old is mandatory...growing up is optional...

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three

I'm so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.

We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls our good at 2 things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do criticize them, you're a mile away and have their shoes

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it

Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.

I'm not random, i just have many tho- OH A SQUIRREL!

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you
would have produced
enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

(Hardly seems worth it.)
--

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months,
enough gas is produced
to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

(Now that's more like it!)
--

The human heart creates enough pressure when it
pumps out to the body to
squirt blood 30 feet.

(O.M.G.!) Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a
hour

(Don't try this at home, maybe at work) An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.) Starfish have no brains

(I know some people like that too.)

And last but not least:

Never take a sleeping pill and a laxative in the same night.

You're a winner! You read all of it! Yay! Now bi bi!