Name:I'm not telling you

Age: The square root of 361

I have had so many fantasies about some fictions for things that I have had to make fan fictions about them. Thus, I created this profile.

I will update my stories when I have the chance. Unfortunately, I have a pretty busy schedule so I cannot write as often as I'd like. Also, my imagination is wierd and starts at the end of the story leaving me to work towards that. Because of this, I may make changes to previous chapters to fit my new vision of the future.

My pen name originates from the fact that my mind retreats into the darkest places and drags out creations and other things to put in my stories. These creations are often villains. Go figure.

I am an avid plot-analyst and I hate it when I can predict a major point of the plot. I read a lot, too. I play video games and I enjoy things with plot twists that leave the reader thinking "What just happened?"

I'm actually using this site to improve my writing abilities if I ever decide to write the book that has manifested itself in my imagination. Many OC's in my stories are actually rough drafts of some of the characters from this story. So, yeah, that's where they come from.

Currently having trouble with plot bunnies. I have them multiplying at an alarming rate and several of them are for purely original stories. I have tried everything to get rid of them I can think of. Fire, RPG's, grenades, hellfire missiles, and even a nuke. THEY'RE IMPERVIOUS!!!!

For anyone interested in reading my original story, here is a link to it. http://www.fictionpress.com/s/3010613/1/The_bDragons_b_bChild_b Please review it if you read.

Team Alucard. Because vampires are meant to kick ass and kick more ass, not F&$*%#G SPARKLE. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R-WUYhLEWFU&feature=endscreen

I have a lot of my own quotes here. Do you think that means i'm full of myself? I don't want to sound that way.

Quotes of My Own That I Think Are Quite Profound and/or funny:

You should learn to laugh at yourself, that way no one else can because they're all laughing with you.

We all have that place in our imagination that is dark and gory and sad. It's just that some of us have been forced into that place more often than others.

A lot of people tell me I'm missing out on a lot of things. They can't ALL be right!

The more you complain, the worse it gets.

The best way to prepare someone for war is to make them go through Hell before you send them off to it.

Intelligence is necessary, knowledge is secondary.

When life gives you lemons, plant them and grow a lemon tree. Then you can have even more lemons for your lemonade!

I'm lost! I'm lost and I'm in front of my own damn cabin!

Random Quotes and Jokes:

Can't remember name ( the guy I heard joke from): I suffer from ADOS, Attention Deficiet-Ooh, Shiny!!

Mark Twain: Classic- a book that everyone praises and doesn't read.

Edgar Allen Poe: I do not suffer from insanity. I enjoy every moment of it!

Theodore Sturgeon: 90 percent of everything is crap.

Yuri Lowell: set this off in the middle of the monsters, and then watch it go BOOM!

Emil Castagnier: I am Lord Ratatosk!

Chris Rapier: I hate life, I hate death, and everything imbetween just doesn't interest me.

Herbert Hoover: Food will win the war.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitue my own.

Kratos Aurion: Feel the pain (slash) of those inferior beings (slash, followed by Kvar crumpling to the ground. Kratos sheaths sword) as you burn in Hell!

Gravemind: Child of my enemy, why have you come? I offer no forgiveness; A father's sins, passed to his son.

WWI soldier: Water fills the trenches. We have to wade through water up to our chests in some areas. The mud is the worst part of it. It takes shoes and sometimes even people's pants. It sucks them down, never to be seen again. Even worse, it sucks their soul down as well. Hell is not fire, Hell is mud!

Arumat P. Thanatos: You say your infinite? I'll give you infinite destruction! You say your perpetual? I'll bring you perpetual ruin!

Classmate on Old People Day (School spirit day before fall dance): I-I need to go feed the pigeons at three.

Arcturus Mengsk: War is coming. With all its glory... and all its horror.

Foss: Boy, you've got more balls than brains. I like that. Hop in.

Isana: My river.

Joel Wilson: People think cruise liners are useless. In reality, they are the biggest exporters of fat people! (he is fat, so he is allowed to talk)

David Taber: Writer's Block: when the characters go on strike.

Tear Grants: If you go and die, I'll never forgive you. Even if the whole world calls you a hero, I'll still hate you, do you understand. I'll never forgive you if you die! (this, my friends and acquiantances, is true love. None of that fire that fades or that passion that dies. Simply caring for someone so much that you can't, and don't want to, imagine a world without them in it.)

Masamune Date: Whether it's cherry blossoms or blood, it's all the same when splattered!

Paul Fix: The only reason people get lost in thought is because it is unfamiliar territory.

John ???: the purpose of studying history is to turn the circle of history into an oval.

Gravemind: I am a timeless chorus. Join your voice with mine and sing victory everlasting!

Yuri Lowell:A villian is someone who doesn't consider defeat a possibility. That's why he thinks the way he does.

William FlameSword (yes, I'm quoting my own character): I wonder what happens when you die in Hell.

Nathan Hale (My former roommate. That is his real name): God was so touched by my act of patriotism and regret that I only had one life to give, he gave me another life to give for my country!

Eris: Oh, us? Staying alive is the easy part for us. It's killing us that's the hard part.

Scott Pilgrim: Quick! What's the address for amazon.ca?

Gravemind: I am a monument to all your sins.

Agon: How do you know when a fight between immortals is supposed to end?

JFK (in CoD:Black Ops Zombies. Dunno if he actually said it while he was alive): Public speaking is the art of diluting a 2 minute idea with a 2 hour vocabulary.

Harvey Dent: You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

Alfred: Some people aren't in it for the money. Some people don't have a reason. Some people... just want to watch the world burn!

Anonymous: Writing is good for the soul.

Madeleine L'Engle: Inspiration usually comes during work, rather than before it.

Gravemind: Do not be afraid. I am peace. I am salvation.

Scott Pilgrim: If I pee my pants will you pretend I got wet from the rain?

Matthew Patel: IT IS I, MATTHEW PATEL!

Alucard (TFS Abridged): Oh, yeah. Forgot about you. Listen, sorry about that whole shooting you thing. But I know that if you look deep into your heart - which is currently all over that tree - that you will find it in yourself to forgive me.

Bane: When the city you love is in ashes, then you have my permission to die.

Random Group Quotes:

(Tales of Vesperia)

Karol Capel: It was awesome! A spear went like 'thunk', the blastia went like 'bang', and then he flew off like 'whoosh'!

Yuri Lowell: Who did what how- huh?

(Tales of Vesperia)

Rita Mordio: Well, go ahead, naming genius. Give this town a name.

Karol Capel: Okay, okay, Scrappy Head-

Rita: (whacks Karol on the head)

Karol: (falls to the ground clutching head) You suck!

(Chemistry)

Mrs. R: Everyone put your books under your table.

(A few moments later)

Mrs. R: Are we there yet?

Dillon: No but we'll be making a bathroom break in the next hour.

(Star Ocean: The Last Hope)

Reimi Saionji: That's why I'm going with you, to make sure you don't do something stupid again!

Edge Maverick: What!? T-That...has been known...to happen.

(Star Ocean: The Last Hope)

Edge Maverick: ...Is this heaven?

Arumat P. Thanatos: No. Not with me around it's not.

(Starcraft 2)

Valerian Mengsk: I want to prove to everyone that I am a greater man than my father.

Jim Raynor: That's not too hard.

(Sawmill Staff Cabin 6B in real life while playing a game)

Preston Moore: Bitch!

-He who shall remain unnamed: Yes?

-(If I say his name, very bad things will happen to me.)

(Sawmill Staff Cabin 6B in real life a few days later)

Preston Moore: Bitch!

He who shall remain unnamed: ...I'm not responding to that.

Me: You just did!

(Cafeteria)

Nathan Hale:Turn that frown upside-down.

Me: but then the rest of my face will be upside-down!

(Overheard conversation)

Guy #1: How about we do a mail check?

Guy#2: (looks down at groin area) Yep, we're both male. Now let's get out of here.

(Blazblue: Continuum Shift II)

Ragna the Bloodedge: Restriction 666 released. Dimensional interference field deployed!

Hazama: We've been through this already! You can't win!

Ragna the Bloodedge: Idea Engine activate!

Hazama: What?

Ragna the Bloodedge: It's time I showed you the TRUE power of the Azure! Blazblue, ACTIVATE! Time to die, you degenerate son of a BITCH!

(Bleach)

Ichimaru Gin: Here I thought you were an interestin' kid, but it turns out you're just creepy.

Kurosaki Ichigo: ... Like you have any right to talk.

(Scott Pilgrim vs. The World (movie))

Roxanne Ricther: Oh, I'd love to reschedule, darling, but I just cashed my last rain cheque!

Scott Pilgrim: What's that from?

Roxanne: My brain!!

(Scott Pilgrim Vol. 4 (Graphic Novel))

Roxanne Richter: Any last words?

Scott Pilgrim: Stop killing me!

(Real life, dorm bathroom)

Me: (walks out of stall after taking a dump)

Brandon Hellwig: Dude, why does your poop smell so bad?

Me: Is poop supposed to smell good?

Brandon Hellwig: No, but it's supposed to at least be identifiable as human! I should smell it and be like "Aw, that human poop smells so bad!". I shouldn't smell it and think "Holy crap, why is there an alien pooping in the bathroom? Why is every single alien concurrently taking a dump in that single stall?!" Seriously, dude!

Me: (dying several times over from laughter)

(Tales of Vesperia)

Yuri Lowell: Our weapons are...!

Raven: Youth!

Karol Capel: Bravery!

Judith: Modesty.

Yuri: ...Like any of you have those!

(Tales of the Abyss)

Luke fon Fabre: Yeah! I was awesome! did ya see me?

Tear Grants: Your footwork was sloppy; you missed the vital points. You were a mess.

(Tales of the Abyss)

Luke fon Fabre: I think I did alright.

Tear Grants: You hesistated too much. Don't think, just react.

Luke: You never let up...

How to know if you're an author

You would rather talk to the voices in your head than the person sitting next to you. Well, it's not my fault that they're better conversationalists. Oh wait, it is...

You know the research librarian’s office, cell, and home phone numbers but can’t remember your own.

Some of the letters on your keyboard are completely worn off. Sorry, it's a new laptop. I haven't had enough time to do that yet.

You would rather write than go out. The outside world is boring. well, the world outside my head.

Your/you’re and their/there/they’re errors send you into an apocaleptic fit. ... maybe. Your not going to say their are any problems with that, are you?

You get cranky if you don’t get to write. Screw not getting to write, I'm more cranky when the voices don't shut up and let me sleep!

You’ve ever said, “The voices are getting louder; I must go write.” not in so many words, but basically, yeah.

When talking with others, you mentally edit their dialogue and compose tags and beats. WTF? Beats? Did 'author' become synonymous to 'rapper' without anyone telling me?

You’ve heard/seen something and thought, I need to write that down. ask me if the sky is blue, you'll get the same response.

You’ve ever written a scene, outline, synopsis, or character sketch on a restaurant napkin . . . and it wasn’t a paper napkin.

You wake up in the middle of the night and scrabble for the pen and paper you keep next to your bed to write down a scene to make the voices be quiet so you can get some sleep. That happens before I go to sleep. If they wake me up then I go in there and kick all their butts and go back to sleep. I usually have to go to class by the time I'm done.

You end an argument with your boyfriend/girlfriend by saying, “Oh, wait, I have to write this down–this is the perfect conflict for my characters! Now, repeat what you just yelled.” nine out of ten times, the relationship ends. I've only had nine... okay, so I've never had a girlfriend. What of it?

Getting the scene finished is more important than food, coffee, or the bathroom. There should be the word sleep in there somewhere.

You have a momentary reality lapse and mention your characters’ situation as a prayer request in Sunday school. Please, I'm not that absent-minded... I think.

A blank wall becomes the screen where the scene you’re writing takes place right in front of your eyes. Usually the wall is red by the end of it, too.

The easiest way for you to deal with conflict is to go home and write it into your story. Mainly because the things I would like to do to people are generally very, um... let's go with horrific.

You purposely eavesdrop when out in public. I do not eavesdrop... I overhear.

At parties, your method of making conversation is to discover people in the room with interesting occupations (preferably your hero’s or heroine’s) so you can conduct research.

You listen to the writer’s commentary on every DVD so that you can analyze his/her writing process. I don't have the attention span for that.

You enjoy to read mostly so you can analyze the author's writing style and use it to work on your own style.

You have a favorite line from every movie you’ve seen. How does that make me an author? Doesn't everyone?

You can’t write because you’re mad at one of your characters. Sometimes it happens because they're mad at me. -_-'

You argue with said character (and even lose sometimes). Actually, they've tried to kill me on several occasions. It was rather traumatic.

You have a folder on your computer labeled “Ideas.” Some of the files within this folder have only one or two words or sentences and while they made perfect sense fifteen years ago, between the software changes in that period of time garbling half the words and your own faulty memory, you have no idea what it means or where you were going with it. But you keep it anyway because you never know, you might remember it eventually. No, I actually use a little book to keep such things, much more reliable. But the same concept applies.

Copied and pasted from Tiger002's profile without his permission, though I doubt he cares. Commentary has been edited to be my own.

92 percent of the teen population would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch or Hollister said it wasn't cool to breath anymore. Re-post if your one if the 8 percent who would be laughing your butt off.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929,SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin,The Komodo Dragon Phoenix,Bust_A_Groover, Tecna, Triggonseed, The Only Innocent Writer Here-Yumi, EstellaB, NarnianMelody, tookieclothespen, bellabookworm9, GoodyGoody23, EdwardIsMyLover, Iluvedward4ever, Amuto Forever, Sasunaru101, Itanaru101, Queen of the Keyblade, Storyteller of Darkness

THE CAGED BIRD

You squat there, singing sadly in your cage,

As I calmy turn onto a newer page.

I hear your song, mournful and clear.

The sorrow is so great, yet I do not shed a tear.

I turn to look upon you as you sing

and hold up to my eyes a key upon a ring.

What if I were to turn the key?

What would it be that happens to me?

How would I feel if you flew away

And left me here to never see the light of day?

I do not know, but still I put on this show

As if I do not care, and the fear continues to grow.

I do not know, I DO NOT KNOW!

That is what truly frightens me so.

I do not know how I would feel,

So my mind continues to reel.

My thoughts are clear,

My heart does not beat frantically in fear.

And then I realize something and I shed a tear.

I am afraid to be the one that frees you here.

I know now what it is I must do!

I must break the lock that shackles you!

But I am afraid of what you'll do outside that cage.

Will you fall upon me in a rage,

Angered by how long you've been hidden away,

Singing your mournful song every single day?

Will you fly away and be gone?

Will I never again hear your song?

Perhaps you will one day return,

Though that thought makes my stomach churn.

If you come back you will have changed,

You'll no longer be the one that I estranged.

No! I will think of these things no more!

I shove the key into the door.

Before I can doubt what I'll do again,

I turn the key and you fly, freer than you've ever been.

I fall to my knees as I begin to mourn.

My soul feels better, though now my heart is torn.

Sadly I watch as you fly away.

I wonder if you'll return one day.

If you do, what will you be?

Perhaps an eagle come to rescue me?

Or will you be a crow, come to eat my rotting flesh?

I shed my tears. You're gone, and I feel blessed.

I decide it's best not to think of it,

Of how your freedom healed me not one bit.

I instead think of the one you'll aid,

Your lamenting song now a soothing serenade.

Human

I saw a man who would perform the wickedest of deeds.

He did what he saw without a care in the world.

I felt anger and hate towards this man; then I realized, that it was me.

-written by Joel Wilson

Triple Filter Test story.-- One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance who ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students?"

"Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."

"Triple filter?" asked the man.

"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my student let's take a moment to filter what you're going to say. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it."

"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?"

"No, on the contrary ...".

"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him, even though you're not certain it's true?".

The man shrugged, a little embarrassed. Socrates continued." You may still pass the test though, because there is a third filter - the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really..."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even Useful, why tell it to me at all?"
Have you ever tried living up to it? Do you believe people can?

Amen, Socrates, amen.