The sorting hat says that I belong in Hufflepuff!

Said Hufflepuff, "I'll teach the lot, and treat them just the same."

Hufflepuff students are friendly, fair-minded, modest, and hard-working. A well-known member was Cedric Diggory, who represented Hogwarts in the most recent Triwizard Tournament.

Take the most scientific Harry Potter
Quiz ever created.

Get Sorted Now!

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2531708/The-Scarlett-Ribbon

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7350901/1/Persona

You are a Clueless Uke!

Having a good time is what you're all about. You're satisfied just to have someone to eat hamburgers and play video games with, and are completely oblivious to other's manipulative behavior. You don't expect much, and that can be a good thing. You're perfect prey for the Opportunist Seme, who might take advantage of you, but you probably won't even notice, or really care, as long as you're enjoying yourself.

Most compatible with: Opportunist Seme, Romantic Seme Least compatible with: Sadistic Seme, Don't Fuck With Me Seme

http://www.semeuke.com/

(\ _ /)
(O.o )

This is Bunny.
Copy Bunny on your profile to help him on his quest for world domination

Things I'm Not Allowed to Do in Hogwarts (just to list a few):
I will not call Professor McGonagall “McGoogles”.
I am not to Owl copies of the Evil Overlord List to suspected Death Eaters.
I will stop referring to Hufflepuffs as "cannon fodder."
Lucius Malfoy is not my "sugar daddy" and I will not claim he is
I also will not refer to Dumbledore as my "pimpmasta".
I am not to sing 'We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz!' when sent to the Headmaster's office.
The song "Ding Dong, The Witch is Dead" is never, ever appropriate.
I will not refer to Professor Lupin as a nice doggy.
I will not use Slytherin and Gryffindor first years as Christmas decorations.
I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class.

OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

RIP We shall remember

Sephiroth Memorial Escape Clause Any misdeed up to and including multiple genocide is forgiveable if you're cool enough. --The Grand List of Console Role Playing Games Cliches

Quotes:

"God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts." -Unknown

"Sex could kill you. Do you know what the human body goes through when you have sex? Pupils dilate, arteries constrict, core temperature rises, heart races, blood pressure skyrockets, respiration becomes rapid and shallow, the brain fires bursts of electrical impulses from nowhere to nowhere, secretions spit out of every gland and the muscles tense and spasm like you're lifting three times your body wight. It's violent, it's ugly and it's messy. And if God hadn't made it unbelievably fun, the human race would have died out eons ago. Men are lucky they can only have one orgasm. Do you know that women can have an hour long orgasm?" -Dr. Allison Cameron, House, M.D.

"Life with men is like a deck of cards... You need a Heart to love them, a Diamond to marry them, a Club to beat them, and a Spade to bury the bastards." -Unknown

"A pro isn't someone who sacrifices themselves for a job. That's just a fool." -Reno, Final Fantasy VII

Kagura: You don't know what a woman feels like when she's in love!
Shigure: Oh, yes I do! Or at least I've felt enough women to venture a guess.
-Kagura & Shigure, Fruits Basket

"We have just witnessed a classic example of what I like to call 'misdirected rage.' I believe the technical term is 'being an ass'." -Sohma Shigure, Fruits Basket

Reno: Hey, partner... /holds up bomb and shakes it slightly/ This thing... uh... got any bite to it?
Rude: Shin-Ra technology at its finest.
Reno: Oh, so you made it?
Rude: If nothing else, it's... flashy.
Reno: /smiles naughtily/ Oh, good...
Rude: You love it, I know.
-Reno and Rude, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children

"I think that one possible definition of our modern culture is that it is one in which nine-tenths of our intellectuals can't read any poetry." -Randall Jarrell

"Books are the carriers of civilization. Without books, history is silent, literature dumb, science crippled, thought and speculation at a standstill. I think that there is nothing, not even crime, more opposed to poetry, to philosophy, ay, to life itself than this incessant business." -Henry David Thoreau

"One of the most obvious facts about grownups to a child is that they have forgotten what it is like to be a child." Randall Jarrell

"Literature is an occupation in which you have to keep proving your talent to people who have none." -Jules Renard

"You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus." -Mark Twain

"I have not lost my mind - it's backed up on disk somewhere." -Unknown

"Turns out if you never lie, there's always someone mad at you." Scott Westerfeld

"A sale? That means I'll go broke saving money." -Michael Greene

"I'm not short. I just live in a big world." -Edward Elric, Full Metal Alchemist

"Me and Cloud here are both backwater experts. Oh yeah!"
-Zack , Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core

“Evil beware. We have waffles.”-Raven, Teen Titans

“Therapy is expensive, popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.”-Anonymous

“A clear conscience is usually a sign of bad memory.”-Anonymous

“Men are 44 percent muscle, 53 percent fat and 3 percent brain. This explains a lot of things.”- Anonymous

"I believe in dragons, unicorns, good men and other mythical creatures." Anonymous

"You talk to God, you're religious. God talks to you, you're psychotic." -Doris Egan

"Ah, yes, divorce. From the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet." -Robin Williams

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

"We're all gonna do three things in life: We're all gonna lie; we're all gonna cry; and we're all gonna take painful shits." -Dane Cook

"Some people are like slinkies--Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs."

“Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.” – Isaac Asimov

“Dying is easy, comedy is hard.”- George Bernard Shaw

"Ah! What should I do? There is no electricity and it's a f-ing sunshiny day! Better call my mom..." Anonymous

"Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of its head with a note that says 'You.' After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done." -Jack Handy

"What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick." -Anonymous

"I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three." -Elayne Boosler

"You can't have everything... where would you put it?" -Steven Wright

"Lead me not into temptation; I can find the way myself." Rita Mae Brown

"Just remember, if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off." -unknown

"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together." -Carl Zwanzig

"Remember to always be yourself...unless you suck." - Joss Whedon

"Love is the breakdown of one's mind … it is the sudden rush that occurs in your heart that leads to unusual behavior and irrational actions. It also decreases your reaction time and lowers your pace in a certain amount of degree. If this happens to you, then you've fallen for it, you're in love." -Mark Aaron

"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain." -Lily Tomlin

"I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another matter." -Winston Churchill

“The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, "You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.” -George Carlin

"...and then Buffy staked Edward. The End." -Hot Topic T-shirt

"You have the right to remain silent. What you lack is the capacity." -Shrek, Shrek 2

"What would I do if I only had six months to live? I'd type faster." -Issac Asimov

"If I didn't have writing, I would be running down the street hurling grenades in people's faces." -Paul Fussel

A ninja waits until the dead of night, when the enemy sleeps and drops his guard, when his weapons lie forgotten in the stillness of the night, that is the moment for a ninja to strike. Copy this into your profile if you're a Ninja or a fan of Naruto manga!

http://areopage.net/atxtheb/Henoch.pdf

http://ecmarsh.com/crl/enoch/enoch1_01.htm

Character Images:

The Moon's Halves (Tsukuyo): http://konachan.com/post/show/126839/blue_eyes-bouno_satoshi-close-hat-original

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6820210/26/Contracted

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4230258/22/Memories_of_May

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2929610/4/Anomie

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1917996/3/Shattered-Illusions

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7523099/1/The-Best-Night-Ever

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8520509/19/The-Unexplainable

Remember to review my stories!

My images are provided by a friend, who has an enormous stock of them. So no, I do not know where they come from, or at least, most of them. She is the one who plays with the pictures, and photoshops stuff until she's satisfied. I generally go to her for pictures.

Autophobia has recently been updated. The next update, will probably be in may.

For the other stories, know that I plan to finish Autophobia before updating them. I don't want to have too much on my plate.

BITCH has been erased by FF.net for it's title! And they bloody had to do it when I already had seven chapters out!(!)