Welcome! On this profile, under my favorites list, you can find quite a bit of Sherlock fan fiction, some Harry Potter, a little Merlin, Pride and Prejudice, Vampire Diaries, The Tudors, and Twilight stories (Ah, Twilight, you bring back memories). I favorite authors whose writing is just brilliant, even if I haven't favorite-ed their story. Enjoy!

Directions to Llama-land: Left at the rainbow, Right at the unicorn. And if you've passed the penguin, you've gone too far. (Re-post, and add-on before the 'passing the penguin' part.)

World's Shortest Fairy Tale...

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?'

The girl said: 'NO!'

And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, camping, drank martinis, ate chocolate, always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell she wanted, never argued, didn't get fat, traveled more, had many lovers, didn't save money, and had all the hot water to herself.

She went to the theater, never watched sports, never wore friggin' lacy lingerie that went up her ass, had high self esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked fabulous in sweat pants and was pleasant all the time.

The End. (Not mine. Really funny, though. :P)

If you can't beat 'em, join them.
If you can't join 'em, bribe them.
If you can't bribe 'em, blackmail them.
If you can't blackmail 'em, kill them.
If you can't kill 'em—you're screwed.

10 Facts (About Me):

1. I am a white female living in America (that's as specific as I'll get), though for all you know I'm a black man living in the U.K. Trust is such a beautiful thing.

2. I'm a feminist. In other words, I believe in equal opportunity between the two sexes and any transgender, asexual, he/she individuals. So, a humanist? It really is too bad that feminism has so much stigma surrounding it. I mean, yes, "feminism", "sexism", and "racism" both have the last syllable "ism", but just look up the definitions if you're confused.

3. I am a supporter of gay rights. (Their flag is a rainbow, people! Support the rainbow!-...)

4. I am pro-choice. Sorry anti-abortionists; I'm not anti-life but a fetus has very few rights when taken into consideration that its very existence is dependent upon another person.

5. I am 100% anti any form of racism. Coming from anyone. (*glares-at-racist-grandmother*) Age does not give you a free pass, people. Same thing goes for any old folks harboring sexist/anti-gay sentiments. Keep it to yourself.

6. I sometimes want to cry when faced with ignorant, stupid-people whose narrow-minded views are responsible for all the evil things in this world (read uber-evil people who are anti-gay, anti-equality, and anti-choice).

7. I think "tolerance" is a nasty word ("my job's tolerable" vs. "my job's awesome"), but it's important, people. SO, yeah...

8. I love curse words (not using them -knowing them). F•U•C•K stands for fornification under the crowned king (i.e. sleeping with the king's wife, which was treason and punishable by death. Your welcome).

9. I'm a self-proclaimed nerd, if one such thing exists.

10. I love fan fan fiction. (I am quite obsessed). I will read anything about the stories I love. I've watched a million shows: Doctor Who, Sherlock, The Big Bang Theory, Men at Work, Game of Thrones, True Blood, the Vampire Diaries, etc., and have read a million and one books. I'm going to even try listing them all.

[A mantra of Sorts:

I'm not a book. I won't be read.
I'm not an item. I cannot be bought.
I'm not an outfit. I refuse to be changed.
I'm not a game. I cannot be won.
I'm not an animal. I will not be tamed
I am what I am, and that's all that I am.

People

are just like

apples on trees.

The best of them are all

Located at the highest point.

There are those who are too afraid

To try and reach for the top of the tree

For fear of suddenly falling and getting hurt.

Instead, they settle for the rotten apples below

That have fallen to the ground and are not as good,

But are safer to reach for. Those at the top think

Something is wrong with them, when in reality

They are really & truly spectacular. They just

Need to wait for the right one to

Come along, the one who's

Brave enough to

Climb all

The way

To the top

Of the tree.

Confession: I'm a Dair fan. That means, for all those who've never watched Gossip Girl (a show I've stopped watching), I ship Daniel "Dan" Humphry with Blair Waldorf. Who is this Chuck Bass you speak of? OH! You mean that narcissistic sadistic pig who told Blair she was like a "wet horse than had been ridden well and put away wet"? Yeah, didn't think so!

Kitty:

／l
（ﾟ､ ｡ ７
l、ヽ
じしf,)ノ

My Personal Alternate Names (because I'm also a kid in a grown-ups body):

1. My GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus "izzle") Jenizzle

2. My DETECTIVE NAME: (color and animal) Blue Serpent (sooo tempted to put Pink Panther...)

3. My STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mom's/dad's "maiden" name) Alljeche

4. My SUPERHERO NAME: (color, drink) Pink Sprite

5. My WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mothers middle name) Martha

6. My GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets) Black Duke

7. My ROCK STAR NAME: (fruit, and something that can go wrong) Star Fruit Party

8. My PIRATE NAME: (color, pirate accessory) Navy Eye-Patch

STORIES All's Fair in Love and War: (not posted)

Politics. Money. Power. After a massive world war, everyone is struggling to receive food and water. Still, where there are people, there is love. *AU. Star-crossed lovers theme.

STORIES: Siren Blood: (not posted)

Vampires have enslaved the human race, using shape shifters and werewolves as bodyguards. Witches have been rooted out and burned. More importantly, they have murdered every member of the Siren race. Or so they thought. For five thousand years, the remaining Sirens have lived in the hidden city Atlantis. Now they want revenge on all the races; humans, vampires and shifters alike. Bella and Alice have been chosen as scouts to relay information about two vampire generals, Jasper Whitlock and Edward Cullen.

Animal Safety Notice:

Ask ten friends to each ask a further ten today. The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily so they can meet their quota of getting FREE FOOD donated every day to abused and neglected animals.

It takes less than a minute (about 15 seconds) to go to their site and click on the purple box 'fund food for animals for free'. This doesn't cost you a thing.Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising. Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know: http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/

Child Abuse is a Serious Issue

4 children die as a result of child abuse. 3 of the four children are under the age of four.

Child abuse happens in every socio-economical stand point, educational level, religion, and ethnicity.

Children who have been abused are 2.5 times more likely to abuse alcohol and 3.8 times more likely to abuse drugs.

1/3 of abused and neglected children will end up abusing their own children-- thus continuing this horrid cycle of hate.

Child abuse is never the child's fault. Every day there are well over 9.6 million children in the U.S. alone who suffer silently. Afraid to expose the family secret. If you believe that child abuse is a horrible cycle that must be put to an end, post this on your profile. Let us become the beacon of hope to those children who must fight the silent battle day by day. Together, we can end their suffering. Their lives already have so many strikes against them. Let us fight with them and let them all know that they are not alone and loved. Put this on your profile if you support the end of child abuse.