Beard.

I like to read edward/bella fanfics, and ones where Bella is a baby/toddler/little child and Edward helps her with a lot of things while growing up. I also like other stories, but mostly Twilight ones.

MY LIFE IN MUSIC MOVIE:

Opening Credits: Pour Some Sugar On Me ~ Def Leppard(lol)

Birth: Feeling Sorry ~ Paramore

First day at school: Welcome To Mystery ~ Plain White T's (Wow XD)

Falling in Love: Do You Like Waffles? ~ Parry Gripp (really? XD)

Fight Song: Pitter Pat ~ Erin McCarley

Breaking Up: If We Ever Meet Again ~ Timberland

Prom: Long live ~ Taylor Swift

Life: Mean ~ Taylor Swift (haha XD)

Mental Breakdown: Your Love Is My Drug ~ Ke$ha (hahaha XD)

Driving: King Of Anything ~ Sara Barielles

Flashback: Impossible ~ Shontelle (wow...)

Wedding: Enchanted ~ Taylor Swift (I love Taylor Swift XD)

Birth Of Child: Lovesick Mistake ~ Erin McCarley (._.)

INTERMISSION

Final Battle: Dear John ~ Taylor Swift

Death Scene: Blah Blah Blah ~ Ke$ha

Funeral: In The End ~ Linkin Park (O_O)

End Credits: Goofy Goober Rock ~ Spongebob (Lol xD)

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Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have Edward Cullen)

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cellphone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn't care if people call her weird (it's a compliment),who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.:HarryArtemis1220, edwardcullenissosexy, all-hail-the-jello, Karren1109, maddythetwilightfreak, WritingDog, xoxM'N'Mxox, Melanie S., The Amazing Sydney, twilightparty

95 percent of teens would cry if they saw the Jonas Brothers at the top of a skyscraper about to jump. Copy and paste this EVERYWHERE if you are in the 5 percent that would shout "Jump! Jump!"

Mommy, Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,

Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

YOUR REAL NAME:
Kit

YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle.)
Kitizzle

YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal)
Blue Snow Leopard

YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and street you live on)
Eveleen Jackson

YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters Of your first name)
Ailki (Sweet xD)

YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (Your 2nd favorite color, and favorite drink)
Black Cocoa

YOUR ARABIC NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, 1st letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of you dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, and last letter of your moms middle name)
Ileiime (O_O How do you even say it? XD)

YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your pets):
Black Shadow (wow... it sounds dark :P)

25 Reasons Why I Owe My Mother

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and then you'll understand."

Mental Hospital Phone Menu:

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital!

Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.

Never knock on Death's door - ring the bell and run away. Death really hates that.

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

I'm not littering...I'm donating to the Earth.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every-time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Procrastinate NOW!

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t either.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.

Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door.

Boys are like Slinky's, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.

Basic Definitions of Science: If it's green or wiggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it's not.

Why do they use sterilized needles for lethal injections?

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Isn't it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honour" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.

Man: Have I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours and I go to mine.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: If I could see you naked I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked I'd die laughing.

Man: So what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u next to i
Woman: Really? I'd put f and u together.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic ... maybe we should have amateurs build everything.

One way to figure out how things work: push all the buttons!

I smile because I have no idea what's going on.

Life was so simple when boys had cooties.

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends.

I ran with scissors and lived!

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.

Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not.

I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Somebody needs a Happy Meal.

Twilight Oath

I promise to remember Bella

Each time I carelessly fall down

And I promise to remember Edward

Whenever I'm out of town

I promise to obey traffic laws

For Charlie's sake of course

And I promise to remember Jacob

When my heart fills with remorse

I promise to remember Carlisle

Whenever I am in the emergency room

And I promise to remember Emmett

Everytime there's a huge boom

I promise to to remember Rose

Whenever I see something that holds pure beauty

And I promise to remember Alice

When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me

I promise to remember Nessie

When I see that beautiful bronze hair

And I promise to remember Esme

When someone tells me they care

I promise to remember Jasper

Whenever my stomach isn't curled

And I promise to remember the Volturi

When someone speaks of dominating the world

Yes, I promise to love Twilight

Wherever I may go

So that all may see my obsession

Because I know what the Twilighters know