Just a guy who likes yaoi

So many great writers here whose stories really make you feel.

I like jazz. I'm pro-choice and I'm against intolerance in all forms whether it be from religion to sexual orientation. I'm an atheist, who is moral, good, fair, and am against the stereotype of atheist being immoral, evil, hateful people.

I'm an up & coming writer. I write when I want to and when I have to.

Here's some of my writing: Please tell me what you think of these.

As the mirror shatters:

As the mirror shatters, the glass falling like rain. So beautiful, So sharp. Like nothing I’ve ever seen. I lose myself, as it cuts me a shower of crimson blood. I don’t notice the pain as I see you over there my perfect angel. You walk over and protect me from the rain. As I see your blood I cry, my perfect angel in pain for me. You hold me tight as I cry in your arms; you’re always there for me. I try to push you away. You’re too good for me. You deserve someone ...better, but you just hold me tighter. You say "You'll love me forever.", and I want to believe. As the rain lets up and I can see your beauty. As I look in to your face I can see the truth. We stayed there til you feel asleep. I picked you up and carried you away with me forever.

"Why?":

Why do you let me hit you. How can you say you still love me. I don’t deserve you, or your love. Why do you still keep forgiving me. It kills me to run, and leave you all alone. As I leave you standing there thinking,” what did I do wrong”, but you know I still love you, and I just want what’s best. I don’t care if it’s killing me, I need to know you’re safe. You come looking for me, and I just try to hide. As you find me, I try to run, but you catch me and say it’s alright. I hit you and tried to run, and you’re left crying there. I go to you,you run from me. Apologies don’t cut it anymore. I’m left standing there thinking all I do is wrong, I need to prove myself. As I say I still love you, I need you in my arms. I will control myself, so you’re not left alone. As I go chasing after you. I find you on a cliff. You step forward, as I run to you screaming out my love. I catch you before you fall, and I hold you in my arms. You struggle and try to run, but I won’t let you go. I’m still in love with you, I need to let you know…. TBC.

"Lost in the fog":

Lost in the fog, always falling, walking blind, lost between the lines. When you fall there’s no one there to catch you. The pain only last a moment, but it lingers forever. You feel it and then you go numb. You forget what it is to feel. You’re cut off heartbroken and alone. Death waits for you, like a predator stalking its prey. No one there to stop, walking blind in to deaths open arms. You fall and break the fragile ice. The pain is sharp and fast, like pin pricks everywhere. The slightest movement causes you to fall. You see someone approach. You cry out for help, but your pleas fall on deaf ears. As he stands above you glaring down. All you can ask him is “why won’t you help me” and all he says is “you’re not wroth it”, and as he walks back into the fog, all you feel is deaths icy embrace, your eyes start to close. Your thoughts start to fall away, like leaves in the wind. One final thought keeps running through your mind, as you slip into deaths loving embrace “you’re not worth it”.

Thanks for reading! Remember to message and tell me what you think. Thanks.

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.

I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz

I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.

I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.

I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.

I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.

I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.

I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.

I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.

I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.

I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.

I'm a NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.

I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.

I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.

I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth or emo.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.

I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.

I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.

I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.

I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".

I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!

I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.

I HAVE STRAIGHT B'S, so I MUST have almost no social life.

I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.

I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.

I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.

I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.

I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.

I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO.

I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.

I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.

I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.

I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.

I’m a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.

I’m a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.

I'm STRAIGHT EDGE, so I MUST be violent.

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.

I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and Kool-Aid.

I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.

I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff

I'm a PUNK, so I MUST only wear black clothes and date other punks.

I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7

I'm CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hate HOMOSEXUALS.

I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.

I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.

I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.

I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA

I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect

I'm WHITE and have BLACK FRIENDS, so I MUST think I'm black.

I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.

I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.

I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.

I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self-control.

I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.

I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.

I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.

I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.

I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon

I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot

I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.

I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.

I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.

I don't like the SUN, so I MUST be an albino.

I have ALOT OF FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.

I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.

I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.

I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.

I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.

I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.

I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.

I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.

I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.

My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.

I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.

I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs

I READ COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.

I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.

I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse

I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.

I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak

I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.

I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.

I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.

I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak

I am an AMERICAN, so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.

I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep

I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirt (It's actually called a kilt)

I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.

I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.

I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.

I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.

I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.

I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.

I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.

I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.

I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and be A MURDERER!

I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea, and have bad teeth.

I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.

I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE

I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser

I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy

I have a FAN CHARACTER so I MUST be an annoying Mary-Sue

I CHAT; I MUST be having cyber-sex.

I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins

I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan

I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion

I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.

I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.

I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.

I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.

I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.

I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.

I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.

I am a WITCH, so I MUST be an OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.

I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.

I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED

I DON'T CURSE (much), so I MUST be an outcast

I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish

I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.

I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.

I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.

I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.

I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s

I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times

I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.

I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.

I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.

I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.

I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.

I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.

I CRY EASILY, so I MUST be a wimp.

I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist

I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake

I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems

I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist.

I like to make jokes, so I must be stupid and immature.

I'm a teenager, so I MUST be irresponsible, moody, and constantly disobedient.

Pluto was no longer declared a planet on August 27 of 2006 just because it was "Too small" and "Off it's orbit" for a couple scientists’ likings. If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO

If you're always tripping over non-existent objects, imaginary objects, air, grass, and paper clips (to put it simply, if you're a klutz) copy and paste this on your profile

If you think that the book Twilight is better than the movie, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy this into your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freaking Trix, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you listen to music when reading fan fiction post this on your profile

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile

If you walk and trip or stumble because your too busy reading a book copy and paste this into your profile

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your pro

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile

If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then copy and paste this into your profile

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think the Cocoa puffs Turkey Bird thing should go the rehab, copy this onto your profile

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

If you've ever read started to read a chapter in a fanfiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile

My best friend is insane! If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, then copy this to your profile

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites, copy this in your profile

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile

If someone gave you money for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or The O.C. or the Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile

If you like Jacob Black better than Edward Cullen, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever stood straight up, then fell down for no apperent reason, copy this to your profile

If you've ever had a conversation with yourself, copy this to your profile

If you've ever lost a bet to yourself, copy this to your profile

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile

If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc, and the people who kill the animals don't use the meat, copy and paste this into your profile

If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!! XD

If you have ever wondered why the heck Canadians and Americans have to spell 'colour' differently, and use different units of measurement, copy this to your profile

If you found out about fan fiction on a Google search like I did post this on your profile

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile

If you can't stand preppy people who talk like this: "I like, can't believe, I like, chipped my manicure!!", copy and paste this into your profile

98% of teens would scream if they saw the Jonas Brothers on a roof top. Post this if you are part of the 2% that would shout JUMP

If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile

If you love reading really long books just for the heck of it, copy and paste this into your profile

5 Truths of Life.
1. You cannot touch all of your teeth with your tongue
2. All idiots, after reading the first truth, try it
3. The first truth is a lie
4. You're smiling right now because you know you fell for it... (Idiot!)
5. You still have a stupid smile lingering on your face
Now, if you fell for it (I KNOW you did), copy & paste this into your profile

If you have ever had a crush on a fictional character, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile

You know you live in 2010 when...
1. You go to a party, sit down and take Facebook pics
2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years
3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/Facebook
4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV
6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer
7. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling
8. You think about how stupid you are for reading this
9. You were too busy to notice number five
10. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five
11. And now you're laughing at your stupidity
12. Put this in your profile if you fell for it. You know you did

If you can see that freezer door, tell yourself to duck, and then walk into it anyway, paste this in your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction, post this

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever tripped UP stairs, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa, copy and paste this into your profile

98 of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa
BEST FRIENDS:Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail
BEST FRIENDS:Would be sitting next to you saying "THAT WAS FRICKING AWESOME!!"

FRIENDS:Have never seen you cry
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore

FRIENDS: Ask you to write down your number
BEST FRIENDS: Have you on speed dial

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then give it back
BEST FRIENDS: Lose your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS:Only know a few things about you
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
BEST FRIENDS:Will kick the whole crowds' ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life

Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic

People who say it can't be done should not interrupt those of us who are doing it

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Why is it that some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

You call me a bitch?
Well a bitch is a dog,
Dogs bark,
Bark is on trees,
Trees are a part of nature,
And nature is beautiful,
So thanks for the compliment. :)

It is wise to walk a mile in a man's shoes before judging him... That way you're a mile away and you have his shoes

I don't obsess, I think intensely

People that don't know me think I'm quiet. People that do wish I was

You love hoodies.
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt.
You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night.

Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day but set the man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life

.:LEARN JAPANESE IN 5 MINUTES:.
Say the words out loud.
1) That's not right... ...Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive? ...Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP... ...Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man... ... Dum Fuk
5) Small Horse... ...Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the Beach?...Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table...Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
8) I think you need a face lift...Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here...Wao So Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet...Wai Yu Mun Ching
11) This is a tow away zone...,No Pah King
12) Our meeting is next week...Wai Yu Kum Nao
13) Staying out of sight...Le i Ying Lo
14) He's cleaning his automobile...Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odor is offensive...Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great... ...Fa Kin Su Pah
(I got this from LoveOfMyLifeIs.'s profile;)

Education is important, school however, is another matter

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you.

Flying is simple, just through yourself at the ground and miss

HE: Can I buy you a drink?
SHE: Actually, I'd rather have the money.
HE:I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.
HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.
HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must've been given your share.
HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.
HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.
HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
SHE: Okay, get out.
HE: I think I could make you very happy.
SHE: Why? Are you leaving?
HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.
HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?
HE: Shall we go see a movie?
SHE: I've already seen it.
HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Hiding from you.
HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.
HE: Is this seat empty?
SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
HE: So, what do you do for a living?
SHE: I'm a female impersonator.
HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
SHE: Do not enter.
HE: Your body is like a temple.
SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.
HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing
HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life: in your wildest dreams.
HE: Your place or mine?
SHE: Both, you go to yours and I'll go to mine.
HE:Does beauty run in your family?
SHE: Well it obviously doesn't run in yours.
HE: I can see forever in your eyes.
SHE: But all I can see is never in yours.
HE: I looked up beatiful today in the thesaurus and your name was included.
SHE: Thanks! I saw your name next to jerk.
HE: You're like a dream.
SHE: Go back to sleep.
HE: What do I have to give you for one little kiss?
SHE: Chloroform.
HE: I want to give myself to you.
SHE: Sorry, but I don't accept cheap gifts.
HE: Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again?
SHE: Yeah, but this time, don't stop.
HE: I think you're th best looking girl here.
SHE: Really? Well, I'd better go find the best looking guy then.
HE: Can I buy you a drink?
SHE: Sure, but only if you buy my girlfriend one too.

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why.
"5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

IF YOUR LIFE WERE A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool.
Opening Credits: N apostrophe T – Tom Lehrer
Waking Up: Day Tripper – The Beatles
First Day At School: Knights of Cydonia – Muse
Making Your New Best Friend: My Home Town – Tom Lehrer
Falling In Love: We will all go together when we go – Tom Lehrer (lol)
Breaking Up: End of Line – Daft Punk – Tron Legacy

Prom: The Son of Flynn- Daft Punk – Tron Legacy
Graduation: Who next? – Tom Lehrer
Life's Okay: Stakes and Torches – Voltaire – To The Bottom Of The Sea
Death Of A Close Friend: The Sentinel – Judas Priest
Mental Breakdown: Give it Up – Dr. Michael White (I wonder…)
Driving: Superheroes – Daft Punk
Flashback: Nocturne - Daft Punk – Tron Legacy
Getting Back Together: National brotherhood week – Tom Lehrer (I get it!!!)
Birth Of A Child: No Shelter – Rage Against The Machine
Wedding Scene: Mayday!!! – Flobots – Fight With Tools

Car Accident: One More Time – Daft Punk (How many times will this happen?!?!?!?)
Final Battle: Alejandro – Lady Gaga

Death Scene: Take A Bow - Muse
Funeral Song: Derezzed - Daft Punk – Tron Legacy (Ha!!!)
End Credits: Microphone Fiend – Rage Against The Machine
Deleted Scenes: Viva La Vida - Coldplay

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

1994: Do YOU remember the 90s??
Just because you were born in '97 doesn't mean you're a 90's kid. It's not like you could remember the original Simpsons. I am sorry but three conscious years of the 90's just wont cut it.
You're a 90's kid if You remember watching -Doug -Ren & Stimpy -Pinky and the Brain -AAAAAAAH Real Monsters! -Rockos modern Life. -Animaniacs -Gargoyles
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You just cant resist finishing this . . . "in west Philadelphia born and raised . . ."
You remember -Step by Step -Family Matters -Dinosaurs -Boy Meets World
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not
When everything was settled by -rock paper scissors or -bubble gum bubble gum in a dish or -ms. mary mack
When football was a daily activity.
When we used to obey our parents.
You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time on a tape.
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.
You remember The Original Game Boy.
You always wanted to send in a tape to You’ve Been Framed...but never taped anything funny.
You remember watching -The Magic School Bus -Wishbone -Reading Rainbow -and Ghostwriter on CBBC.
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.
You remember those Where's Wally books.
You remember eating Warheads and Splashers Gum.
You remember watching -the 1st Batman -Aladdin -Ninja Turtles -ghost busters
You remember Ring Pops.
If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.
Making those little paper fortune things, and then predicting your life with them.
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere.
One word...trolls
Windows 95 was the best.
You watched the original cartoons of -Rugrats -Wild Thornberry's -Power Ra ngers -Rocket Power.
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.
You collected those Beanie Babies.
Carebears Lambchop's song never ended.
Silver dollars, which were cool to have.
Everyone watched the WB.
If you even know what an original walkman is.
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand"...enough said
You went to McDonald's to play in the play area.
You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.
Before the MySpace frenzy...Before the Internet & text messaging...Before Sidekicks & iPods...Before PlayStation3 or X-BOX 360...Before Spongebob.
Before Tupac was shot.
When light up trainers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 45p a litre
When we recorded stuff on VCRs.
You had slap bracelets!
You actually played outside until it was dark! Way back.
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.Post this in your bulletin if you remember these days... Highlight the ones that apply to you!

Do it one by one, don't look ahead
1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex
Jenny
2. Which is your favourite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow
Black
3. Your first initial
K
4. Your month of birth
July
5. Which color do you like more, black or white
White
6. Name a person of the same sex as yours
Kevin
7. Your favourite number
57
8. Do you like California or Florida more
California
9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more
Ocean
10. Write down a wish (a realistic one)
I find THE one
Are you done?
If so, scroll down
(don't cheat--)
THE ANSWERS
1. You are completely in love with this person
2. If you choose:
Red: You are alert and your life is full of love
Black: You are conservative and aggressive
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back
Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love
Yellow:You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down
3. If your initial is:
A-K:You have a lot of love and friendships in your life
L-R:You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good
4. If you were born in:
Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected
Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that won't last long but the memories will last forever
July-Sept.: You will have a great year and experience a major life changing experience for the good
Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soulmate
5. If you choose..
Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change
White:You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do and will do anything for you, but you may not realize it
6. This person is your best friend
7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime
8. If you choose..
California: You like an adventure
Florida:You are a laidback person
9. If you choose..
Lake:You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved
Ocean:You are spontaneous and like to please people
10. This wish will come true if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday