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duj
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since: 08-24-02, id: 257907, Profile edited: 04-30-08
Author has written 26 stories for Harry Potter.

I'm a Snape-aholic stay-at-home mother of six who has been writing fanfic in my head for decades but only started writing it down this century. In general, my stories are an N/S3 zone, ie, no slash, no swearing, no sex, but there is an occasional kiss and "Dreams" glances obliquely at the marriage bed. I do explore parental-guidance issues like self-harm, guilt and shame, and occasionally find it necessary to lightly touch on violence.

I've noticed that my favourite fandom characters, such as Snape and Percy and Neville, are all under-appreciated and male. Perhaps they symbolise my autistic sons, and society's tendency to dismiss disabled people as being worth less than "normal" people.

What draws adults like myself to Snape is not "bad boy appeal" (I find the very suggestion ludicrous, frankly), but hurt/comfort or identification; we recognised early on that Snape was a profoundly unhappy man, trapped by duty and obligation into a dead-end job/life. "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation" (Henry David Thoreau) - only for Snape, despair is a more accurate word.

As I wrote back in 2004 in "Everything", ch 5: "Miserable. Yes, that was it, he was miserable. Under that cold, grim mask, he’d probably been grieving almost since before she was born, grieving in silence because whom could a spy confide in? ... Ron wasn’t the only person who wouldn’t forgive him. She was sure he’d never forgiven himself."

The books show him almost entirely through the eyes of Gryffindor students, and even the authorial voice is a Harry-echo - to the detriment of the series, in my opinion. To redress the balance, I tend to give a Snape-eyed view of events and characters. (This leads some readers to assume I'm fully in agreement with him, when all I'm really doing is presenting the opposing argument.) I've extended this to include SSHG romance and mentor-fics because they play well off each other and give me an opportunity to explore unresolved issues from canon or life.

I will not be changing any previous stories to conform to DH. It has now been confirmed which side Snape was on and that some generally-loved characters were indeed grubby-grey, as I believed. Nevertheless, I found the final book a profound disappointment on almost every level - even worse than my rather low expectations - and the author's apparent vision and morality abhorrent. (There is a coherent under-story that tells a better tale, but her interview comments show little awareness of its existence.) I still intend to finish my WIPs, but updates will be irregular and I don't promise to start any new stories.

I'd like to acknowledge some particular influences: Dzeytoun, ReeratheRed and Whitehound, whose fics have strongly coloured some of my Snape-views, Lady Claudia's site, whysnape, for extracting and analysing all the Snape sections part in JK's books, Harry Potter Lexicon, for their vast repository of information, Little Tigger, for persuading me to post, and Bellegeste and Cecelle, my previewers, whose searching questions and criticisms greatly improve the finished product.

A note to flamers: Piggybacking on someone else's reputation is not a good way to get your existence noticed. It works, yes, but only in the way we notice if we step on something stinky in the street. A momentary annoyance as we pull out the scrub brush...




1. Unexpected » reviews
SSHG, WIP, not HBPcompatible. '...sometimes people say things they don’t mean or that they’re sorry about later...'
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 24 - Words: 14,561 - Reviews: 743 - Updated: 6-10-08 - Published: 3-20-07
2. In Your Dreams » reviews
SSHG, WIP, not HBP or DH compatible. Complete. Circumventing a prophecy is not that easy...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 32 - Words: 85,126 - Reviews: 1531 - Updated: 3-18-08 - Published: 2-25-07
3. Into the Ether » reviews
WIP, SSHG, DH spoilers but not DHcompatible. 'He's back and I am alive... Cruciatus only seems endless. The pain goes and the body barely remembers, but for the injuries selfinflicted under its influence...'
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General/Friendship - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,127 - Reviews: 117 - Updated: 10-23-07 - Published: 6-24-07
4. In the Light reviews
DHandHBP oneshot, character death. So much blood. It came out, gushing, from two small wounds in the white neck, and Hermione knew immediately that this was a much worse bite than Harry’s had been – and that had been hard enough to heal...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,114 - Reviews: 54 - Updated: 8-20-07 - Published: 8-20-07
5. The Percy Papers reviews
A set of nine 55word drabbles about Percy's journey, OotP to HBP. Hands still trembling, Percy packed his clothes and papers and other assorted possessions...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 533 - Reviews: 14 - Updated: 7-19-07 - Published: 7-19-07
6. Tell Naught But Lies » reviews
Alternative DH. They turned as one, suddenly aware that Harry had dropped out of the conversation and was staring again at the eaglehead of the key, studying its fierce eyes as if he could see into them. He didn’t notice them noticing him...
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 29,281 - Reviews: 178 - Updated: 7-18-07 - Published: 1-4-07
7. Turncoat reviews
Two doubledrabbles, inspired by the DoM fight: Evil Lupin, Good Lucius... Someone had to do it. Lupinlovers, you have been warned. Enter at own risk.
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 715 - Reviews: 31 - Updated: 7-16-07 - Published: 7-16-07
8. Betrayals » reviews
WIP, edited to be HBPcompatible. The Gryffindor gits came in then, followed closely by Slughorn, and the lesson started. They were preparing the base for Eckhart’s Elixir today...
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 9 - Words: 12,675 - Reviews: 137 - Updated: 6-20-07 - Published: 10-5-04
9. The Brightness of Candles reviews
HBP Spoilers. Nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweak... You probably thought it didn't mean anything, just four words plucked at random ...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,310 - Reviews: 66 - Updated: 11-28-06 - Published: 11-28-06
10. Everything I've Ever Done: Reunion » reviews
SSHG sequel to Everything I've Ever Done, with new Percy arc. Epilogue: It was a very Weasley wedding...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 9 - Words: 36,083 - Reviews: 173 - Updated: 11-15-06 - Published: 5-2-06
11. Attribute:A Tribute reviews
Companion poem to Borolin's Lost and Found, with apologies to Emily Dickinson
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 178 - Reviews: 10 - Updated: 5-25-06 - Published: 5-25-06
12. Risk » reviews
HBP Spoilers! Rita shook her QuickQuotes Quill. “Is it true that famed recluse and warhero, Severus Snape, head of fastgrowing Potions company, Snape Enterprises, is here under cover of Polyjuice?” Thanks to HermioneGranger91 for the inspiration.
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 3,051 - Reviews: 130 - Updated: 5-24-06 - Published: 11-8-05
13. Crabbe's Poetry Book » reviews
HBP spoilers. COMPLETE. Crabbe writes poetry. Who knew? Third chapter, Bottoms and beetles and digging holes...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K - English - General/Poetry - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,848 - Reviews: 78 - Updated: 5-18-06 - Published: 2-6-05
14. Who Lives in Disguise » reviews
HBPconcurrent and compatible, SPOILERS, COMPLETE! It was the longest, shortest trip back from Hogwarts ever. Nominated in Fifth Multifaceteds
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 16 - Words: 49,766 - Reviews: 475 - Updated: 5-4-06 - Published: 11-3-05
15. Everything I've ever done » reviews
COMPLETE! There were likely to be enough cross words when they finally met. For seven years of his teaching, Hermione had had nothing but cross words from him... Life was a puzzle sometimes. SSHG, Nominated for 4th Multifaceteds and Moste Potente Passions
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 49,853 - Reviews: 782 - Updated: 4-27-06 - Published: 10-25-04
16. Post mort » reviews
Complete, AU since HBP. How long Hermione lay there grieving she didn't know, nor did she notice when she first felt a heart thudding under her cheek and arms reaching to hold her... Then a familiar voice said the unthinkable. SSHG, character death
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 13,548 - Reviews: 341 - Updated: 10-9-05 - Published: 7-10-05
17. How Dumb Were You? » reviews
WARNING, SPOILERS FOR HBP. Was Dumbledore dumb? Harry hasty? Hermione hokey? WonWon wanton? And what did Fred and George have to do with it? More: Sluggish Slughorn, halfhearted halfblood prince, delinquent Draco, repetitive Riddle, go getter Ginny
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Tragedy - Chapters: 10 - Words: 4,133 - Reviews: 284 - Updated: 8-30-05 - Published: 7-17-05
18. Dumbledore's Man reviews
HBP spoilers, Character death. Harry stood up slowly, shaking off the ashes of a dead dark lord... A few feet away a long blackclad body lay prone where it had fallen after shielding him from an organripping curse...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,876 - Reviews: 80 - Updated: 8-9-05 - Published: 8-9-05
19. Wrong » reviews
Oneshot that grew. How thick do they think I am Peter's perspective after the pensieve incident...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,002 - Reviews: 55 - Updated: 1-26-05 - Published: 1-4-05
20. Fates and Fortunes reviews
A collection of ten fairly light-hearted 55-word drabbles that explore in chronological order the possible fates of some of our favourite characters.
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 591 - Reviews: 55 - Updated: 12-18-04 - Published: 12-18-04
21. Breaking point » reviews
WIP "The night would bring him neither rest nor comfort till he’d spoken to Albus so he might as well get it over with..."
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,769 - Reviews: 42 - Updated: 11-15-04 - Published: 11-11-04
22. A Bludger to the Gut reviews
One shot. Snape's thoughts on learning that Lupin has been employed as the DADA teacher. Some things can never be forgotten... the perpetual flinch of knowing they were waiting to hex me...
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,026 - Reviews: 39 - Updated: 10-17-04 - Published: 10-17-04
23. Backbone reviews
One shot. "Dangling upside down and wandless in front of that git Potter, Severus had only one weapon left. Time to use it then."
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 878 - Reviews: 45 - Updated: 10-14-04 - Published: 10-14-04
24. The Old Anger reviews
One shot. "Unfortunately Potter was called away before he could have the instructive opportunity of ingesting poison..." slight SSHG implied
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,025 - Reviews: 22 - Updated: 10-12-04 - Published: 10-12-04
25. Levels of Stupidity reviews
One-shot. A Snape-eye view of Harry's Sorting and first Potions lesson.
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,915 - Reviews: 48 - Updated: 10-11-04 - Published: 10-11-04
26. Snape dialogues reviews
One shot. Snape-eye view of events at Hogwarts from Harry's first year till after the final battle, told in 8 55-word snippets of dialogue.
Complete - Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 716 - Reviews: 49 - Updated: 10-3-04 - Published: 10-3-04
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