FanFiction.Net - unleash your imagination| Topaz |
Author has written 17 stories for Harry Potter. Yar. It is I, Topaz, who have [has? there's a sticky grammar predicament] decided to return and redo my bio. Hello, person. Why are you here? I haven't written anything in ages. Go crawl back in your hole.
Here is some basic information about myself.
So how are you? How am I? How is the world? The world's in sucky shape. The screen name I gave is no longer in use, but I'm not giving out my new one because I'm busy being a hermit and not talking to people. So there. :P You can email me at tangtopaz@hotmail.com if there's some pressing need like those men in white coats think you're me or something. I might return someday with another account, but for now . . . Topaz is dead. Dead. Muahaha. A scream echoes far off in the distance. That was quite a loud thud, wasn't it? Little crimson droplets fly through the air. Pretty . . . it's like a fountain! The obligatory "Noooo!" is shrieked by some random observer, who then dives toward the motionless corpse at your feet. Gosh, it smells bad in here. Like blood, y'know? Said corpse staggers to its feet and wanders off, humming happily. | |||||||
1. Hogwarts Sing-A-Long » reviewsHogwarts sing-a-long, join the fun... It's finally finished! A chaptered story that's actually finished...read it now, you know you want to! Oh. Really? Not even a tiny bit? Well, fine, just be that way!Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,290 - Reviews: 110 - Updated: 6-27-01 - Published: 5-19-012. Curses, My Nose Fell Off! » reviewsHow Eloise Midgen cursed her nose off. Note my creative names for the chapters ^_^.Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,175 - Reviews: 88 - Updated: 3-10-01 - Published: 3-5-013. Quicksand reviewsShort, fluffy little R/H fic. I can't believe I wrote this. *cringes*Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 424 - Reviews: 17 - Published: 3-9-014. Mad Libs, Harry Potter Style reviewsYou get to fill in the blanks for both a positive review and a flame. In case you don't know what mad libs are, I included directions. Have fun!Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 518 - Reviews: 78 - Published: 2-20-015. Who's The Perfect One For You? reviewsHarry & friends take a survey to find the perfect guy/girl for them. It's based on a true story ,too... *shudder*Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,298 - Reviews: 106 - Published: 1-31-016. The Unicorn's Horn » reviewsMy version of the fifth book, where 7 American students visit Hogwarts for half the year and 7 Hogwarts students go to America for the second half. I know the American wizarding school thing is WAY overdone, but I've tried to be creative, so please reviewHarry Potter - Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,012 - Reviews: 77 - Updated: 1-29-01 - Published: 1-17-017. Neville Has A Hairy Tongue reviewsA respone to METMA Mandy's challenge. Er... rather strange. (Duh) Please read! Although you will probably be traumatized... ^_^Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,384 - Reviews: 36 - Published: 1-26-018. The Confessions Booth reviews"Bless me, Snape, for I have sinned..."Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,509 - Reviews: 369 - Published: 12-19-009. The Day the Characters Took Over the World reviewsWhen angry characters take over the world, what are the fic authors going to do?! Well, first off, they're going to bash me over the head for writing such a dumb summary...Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,073 - Reviews: 54 - Published: 12-16-0010. It's A Wonderful Life Except In Potions reviewsMy first non-sugar-high fic! Yay! Instead of being insane it's just cheesy...joy.Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,013 - Reviews: 38 - Published: 12-16-0011. Harry Potter And The Standardized Test reviewsUm... look at the title. Also includes the origin of the MCAS (I'll give you a hint: Voldemort).Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 846 - Reviews: 133 - Published: 12-4-0012. Love Potions And Eggnog Cookies Don't Mix reviewsUm... heh heh... sort of D/H emphasis on the words 'sort of'... oh, just read it! Really strange. Kinda scary.Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,632 - Reviews: 66 - Published: 11-27-0013. The Wonderful World Of I Forget The Name reviewsComplete random nonsense. Only to be read if you are on a sugar high. :-)Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,438 - Reviews: 65 - Published: 11-24-00 - Complete14. The Evil Pumpkin Juice reviewsNo particular plot except the one Hermione bought, but everyone ignored that... um, nevermind... a cliche with no self insertion except one little sentence that doesn't really count...Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 543 - Reviews: 47 - Published: 11-22-0015. Song Of the Snorting Hat reviewsThis the the Sorting Hat. This is the Sorting Hat on drugs.Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 159 - Reviews: 188 - Published: 11-20-0016. Mary Sue Returns reviewsAnd our beloved *cough* heroine (not the drug) returns! NOT a chapter, just a sort of sequel. Yah. Sure. ^_^Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 846 - Reviews: 62 - Published: 11-20-0017. Mary Sue Comes To Hogwarts reviewsWell, it's been done a lot by now, but who cares. I present to you...the dreaded...Mary Sue!Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 997 - Reviews: 116 - Published: 11-19-00
