sneaky lunitic spy
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since: 12-13-10, id: 2654637, Profile Updated: 10-19-12
country: USA
Author has written 5 stories for Vampire, Skulduggery Pleasant series, Misc. Books, and Harry Potter.

You know you've read too much Harry Potter fanfiction when...

1. You start confusing it with the books.

2. You genuinely think that infamous fanfiction characters like the Professor, Henchgirl, and Danger Granger were actually in the books.

3. You believe that Harry and Hermione were canon.

4. You know Charlie Weasley was a main character.

5. And so was Mark Evans.

6. You start using phrases like "Merlin's pants" and "Bloody Hell" on a reglar basis.

7. You see a rat and scream "It's Wormtail!"

8. You see a big black dog and scream "It's a Grim!"

9. You believe that Dumbledore can't be gay because he and McGonagall were meant to be.

10. You know Cedric is still alive because he's too hot to die.

(this happens to me ALL the time...)

Petition

This is one of many petitions. Add your name to this and any others you find. Add your name to this big petition (www. change petitions /fanfiction- net- stop- the- destruction- of- fanfiction- net#). The administrators of are as of June 4th going to be taking down Fics that have lemons or have extreme violence. Now I don't know about you but I think thats stupid. There are many wonderful fics that only have one or two lemons in them yet the plot itself is awesome! You can't just take down a 100,000 word fic just because it has a lemon in a chapter that is only 1000 words long. Now I urge you all to read the petition below, sign it, and repost this to your own fics. Hopefully if we make enough noise everything will return to normal. Thank you.

Greetings to the fine folk that moderate our site.

Myself, along with many, have been writing and posting on your fine site for years now, some of the better examples of up and coming writers out there are now suddenly finding some of the stories we've come to love at risk of being removed without the chance to even rectify our errors.

For some, that means the permanent loss of a story. While I don't have anything that I believe violates your terms of use, there are those out there that are never able to recover a story in its original form, this is something I find to be almost worthy of a legal action, as while we cannot claim ownership of a character, the stories are OURS and simply destroying them is something that is inexcusable.

It's quite easy to simply add an MA rating, additional filters or even a simple requirement for a free membership to read the stories presented here, and would cut down on hateful anonymous reviews and posts at the same time, so I have to question as to why such a thing, in all this time, simply wasn't added.

If you're worried about falsification of a registration then have an appropriate disclaimer and then there can be no dispute, you took your steps and the PARENTS didn't monitor their children, if that is even your concern. If it is more of a personal view or desire then please at least let people know and give them a chance to remove a story that you and yours find offensive, most people on the site are actually rather cordial when it comes to such requests.

While I cannot say for sure if this letter will even reach those that may be willing to listen, of if it's more akin to a wide spectrum purge in preparation for something bigger, please understand that you are going to be losing a LARGE number of your writers, and thus your income from a lack of readers if there is not some level of action taken to help with this situation.

For those that may agree with this, please feel free to sign on and send this to the support server, maybe we can get some movement on this.

ALERT YOUR READERS AND YOUR FAVORITE AUTHORS!!! PM AND REVIEW THE ADMINISTRATORS UNTIL THEY LISTEN!!!

If you get worried add your story here (www . adultfanfiction . net) before they get deleted. Go here to add your name to yet another petition. www. change petitions /fanfiction- net- stop- the- destruction- of- fanfiction- net#

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sneaky lunitic spy

The Idiot's Guide to Flaming -Stolen from Akuma-Death-Child who stole it from Ryu Pendragon

Here it is ladies and gentlemen. I am going to personally hand out some tips on how to properly flame.

Now I will admit that I've only ever been flamed once, but let me tell you that it was a sore disappointment. I was waiting for my first flame and then when it came, it was a complete flop. I've seen an awful lot of poorly executed flames here and there and I think it's about time that people start spreading the word on proper flaming before one of these idiots hurts themselves. So here are the basic rules:

1) Please have a point. I can't stress this enough people. If you think something sucks, there has to be a reason. If you have no point then there's no point in reading your review.

2) Post some literary venture of your own before you attempt a flame. Think of it as your resume. We need to see some credentials damn it! You can't just walk in off the street! How do we know if you're qualified to be making this judgment? We can't let people go around writing these things all willy-nilly. (If nothing else, it's bad form not give us something we can flame you back for.)

3) Check your spelling and grammar. There's nothing worse then making a bunch of grammatical errors right in the middle of telling someone else what's wrong with their writing. You lose all credibility. Yeah... You hear that?... They're laughing at you!

4) Do it with style. You've heard the saying, I'm sure. 'If a thing is worth doing it's worth doing well.' If you're actually going to take the time to cut someone down, the least you could do is get their attention. A simple 'duh... it sucks George' is not gonna cut it. Seriously. If you intend to be mean, then at least try to come off like the villain, and not like one of his nameless henchmen. (think scathing)

5) Read summary warnings. Trust me. You don't want to go ripping on people for content that you were clearly warned about. That honestly only makes you look like an idiot. Wait, what's that?... Oh, they're laughing at you again!

6) Throw in some amusing word play. When you step into the arena baby, you want to show off you're skills. A truly good flame entertains the crowd. That way people don't just plain hate you outright. You want them to almost look forward to more of your acerbic wit.

There they are. Please feel free to rip them off and post them where ever the hell you like. Don't hesitate to let me know if there's anything that you think should be added to the list as well. I may think of some more later myself. Invariably you think of more of them when you happen to see a poorly executed flame. It's a real problem and we need to get people educated on the issue.

Thank you for taking the time to review the facts.

I'd like to finish with a moment of silence for all the poor, lame little flames out there who never really had a chance...

Cinderella walked on broken glass. Sleeping Beauty let a lifetime pass. Belle fell in love with a hideous beast, Princess Jasmine chose a common thief. Ariel walked on land for love. Snow White dreamed a dream undreamed of. It was all about blood, sweat, and tears, because love means facing your BIGGEST fears. We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot.

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask myself random things?')

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone’s liver?')

After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, 'Holy crap, this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Sticks pens off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it would be cool to have A.D.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101(or nearly did :D ).

(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

QUOTES - all Derek Landy :DD

“Doors are for people with no imagination.” - Skulduggery Pleasant

“Are you going to shoot me?' Vengeous sneered. 'I wouldn't be surprised. What would a thing like you know about honor? Only a heathen would bring a gun to a sword fight.'

And only a moron would bring a sword to a gunfight.” - Skulduggery and Vengeous

“We're not retreating, we're advancing in reverse.' --Skulduggery Pleasant”

“Vengeous scowled. 'As you can see,' he said, 'you are vastly outnumbered.'

I usually am.'

Your situation has become quite untenable.'

It usually does.'

You are within moments of being swarmed by these filthy creatures of undeath and torn apart in a maelstrom of pain and fury.'

Skulduggery paused. 'Okay, that's a new one on me.”

“What is it?' Stephanie whispered.
'That, my dear Valkyrie, is what we call a monster.'
She looked at Skulduggery. 'You don't know what it is, do you?'
'I told you what it is, it's a horrible monster. Now shut up before it comes over here and eats us.”

“Stairs," Valkyrie said, disappointed.

"Not just ordinary stairs," Skulduggery told her as he led the way down. "Magic stairs."

"Really?"

"Oh, yes."

She followed him into the darkness. "How are they magic?"

"They just are."

"In what way?"

"In a magicky way."

She glared at the back of his head. "They aren't magic at all, are they?"

"Not really.” - Valkyrie and Skulduggery

“Kindness suits you."

"Really? I think I'm quite allergic to it.”

“Then I reckon we got ourselves a good old-fashioned standoff." Nobody moved, or said anything, for the next few moments.
"Old-fashioned standoffs are mighty borin” - i agree with Sanguine :P

“It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay." - China Sorrows

“So he has no head'
'Thats usually what headless means'
'No head at all?'
'Your really not getting the whole headless thing are you?'
'Its just kind of silly even for us...” - Valkyrie and Gordon

“Well, to put it delicately, she has the power to suck out people's brains.” - Skulduggery Pleasant

“Valkyrie patted Fletcher’s arm. “Don’t worry,” she said. “If the bad man comes, I’ll protect you.”
“If the bad man comes,” Fletcher responded, “I’ll bravely give out a high-pitched scream to distract him. I may even bravely faint, to give him a false sense of security. That will be your signal to strike.”
“We make a great team.”
“Just don’t forget to stand in front of me the whole time,” he said.” - Valkyrie and Fletcher

“Valkrie: You are such a moron
Skulduggery: Don''t be jealous of my genius.”

“I need a weapon,” Valkyrie muttered.
“You’re an Elemental with a Necromancer ring, trained in
a variety of martial arts by some of the best fighters in the world,” Skulduggery pointed out. “I’m fairly certain that makes you a weapon.”
“I mean a weapon you hold. You have a gun, Tanith has a sword... I want a stick.”
“I’ll buy you a stick for Christmas.” - Valkyrie and Skulduggery

“Are you taking my hat hostage?” - Skulduggery Pleasant

“You think Bernadette Maguire killed him?”
“Uh… no. She’s, like I said, she’s old.”
“Old people can kill people too.”
“I know, but…”
“She could be a ninja.”
“She’s not a ninja, for God’s sake. She’s somebody’s great grandmother.”
“I want you to think carefully about this, Kenny. Have you ever seen her with a sword?”
“What?”
“How about throwing stars?”
“This is ridiculous.”
“Have you ever seen her dressed up as a ninja? That would have been my first clue.”
The girl sucked in her cheeks so she wouldn't laugh out loud.” - Skulduggery and Kenny

“We punch people, Valkyrie. That’s who we are. Embrace your inner lunatic. Fun times guaranteed.” - Skulduggery

“Come and have a go, if you think you're hard enough” - Tanith

“tanith: have you called the police?
fergus: they, uh, they said theyd call by this afternoon.
tanith: tell them not to bother... im his doctor.
beryl: what kind of doctor dresses in brown leather?
tanith: the kind that looks good init”

HI my nick name is Liz. i am slitly okay totaly insane and sneaky. my fav book series are as follows vampire academy,Skullduggery plesant, harry potter, septimus heap thats all folks(Well acctually ther are many more i just cant think of them). (you may call me any thing I dont care as long as its is funny or insane) insanely awesome by p.s. im sneaky im a lunitic and im a spy i know were u live! i just want u to know 1 more thing bout me I'm one of those people who break out laughing in complete silence and I'm a retard at times

I must say the story I most respect is a Harry Potter one called Killing Is Not The Answer by writertron I love this story and i'm giving it an imaginary award of repectiness and epicness

i love vampire academy

but i am obsesed with skulduggery plaesant and a very strong valduggery supporter so all fans for flecher and val u r sick...jk jk i like them to just not as much

thats all for now but i will be random at times

cheese or pizza witch is better let me know

"so now that we're mad,why dont we go enjoy it?" if u think like this copy and paste it in your profile

do you know what time you were born and wear: i shale find out

1.write the name of a person the oppisite sex: Chris

2.which is your fav color out of red,black,blue,green,or yellow:Blue (fav since as long as i remember)

3.your first initils?EB your month of birth:March

5.which color do you like more,Black or White:Black

6.name a person of the same sex as yours:Lucy

7.your fav number:22

8.do you like califonia or florida more:California

9.do you like the lake or the ocean more:Ocean

10.write down a wish (a relistic one):I wish that i could have a manson filled with every book in the world(i know book aholic)

Are you done? Huh?

If so scroll down (Dont cheat!)

THE ANSWERS

1.You are compleatly in love with this person (yup hes my friend though he doesn't date friends)

2.If you chose

Red: You are arlert and your life is full of love

Black: You are conservitive and aggressive

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back (funny i am laid back...on my bed)

Blue: You are spontanious and love kisses and affection from the one you love (awsome now i know why i love this color)

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down

3. If you initils are

A-K You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R You/ trie to live life to its fullest and your love life is sure to blossem

S-Z You like to help others and your futer love life looks very good

5. If you were born in

Jan.-Mar.: Your year will go very well for you and you will dicover that you fall in love with someone toattly unexpected

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relation ship that will not last long but the memories will last forever

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experiance for the good

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be great, And you will go through lots of drama and heart break, But eventually you will find your soul mate.

6.If you choose

Black: Your life will take on in a diffrent direction,it will seem hard at times but it will be the best thing for you,and you will be glad for the change

White: You will have friend who compleatly confides in you and would do anything for you,But may not relize it

7.This person is your best friend(yup lll)

8. This is how many close friends you will have in a ife time(awsome 22 close friends)

9. If you choose

Califonia: you like adventure (hell ya i do best part of life)

Flordia: you are a laid back person(on my bed i am and not that way)

10. If you choose

Lake:you are loyal to your friends and your love and you are very reseved

Ocean: you are spontanious and like to please people(again not that way!)

11. This wish will only come true if you RE-POST THIS BULLITIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday

time for the quiz section

The sorting hat says that I belong in Slytherin!

Said Slytherin, "We'll teach just those whose ancestry is purest."

Slytherin students are typically cunning and hungry for power. Important members include Draco Malfoy (Harry's nemesis), Professor Severus Snape (head of Slytherin), and Lord Voldemort (Tom Marvolo Riddle).

Take the most scientific Harry Potter Quiz ever created.

Get Sorted Now!

Full Blood Vampire

You were born a vampire meaning no bite marks for you. Some say you are the direct descendent of a demon from hell, while others say you are descended from Vlad Tempish, also known as Dracula. Your skills are more powerful than a regular vampire's, the difference being impossible for humans to comprehend. It is said you can even call shadows to help you. You also have age control, meaning you may be 10,000 years old but can look 10 or 100 depending on what you like.

My Patronus is a Stag

Your patronus takes the form of a Stag. A stag is proud and strong, which is characteristic of your personality. You have a powerful and compassionate heart. You find strength in protecting others, particularly friends and family, or those who are weak. Your patronus is shared by one of the most famous wizards ever, Harry Potter. You have little to no trouble conjuring a patronus because your desire to defend yourself and others outweighs your fears and allows you to focus on the task at hand.

What wand would you have in the harry potter books?

Dragon Heartstring

If you were a Harry Potter character, the core of your wand would be made of runespoor fang. This means you are clever, inventive, and creative, but can also be mean and demanding, put yourself first, and are good at insults.

I Would Survive a Horror Movie

Congratulations! You survived! You made it through our maze of horror without getting yourself killed...though I gotta say, you do look a little worse for the wear. Celebrate and enjoy your victory over evil! You've won...this time. Just be careful because you may not be so lucky in the sequel.

Multiple Personalities

Hello, and hello, oh! and hello to you, too. Now all of you have done a great job taking this quiz, but it's not as impressive as your ability to play Poker against yourself. Just remember to hold hands while crossing the street to the mental institution. Everyone find a buddy!

You are You Belong with Me

"You Belong with Me" is one of the most classic love stories. You love someone who is with someone else, even though you know that you are the right person for your love. After all, no one will understand that person the way that you do. Have patience! You will get your love in the end, because you are true to yourself. Being 100% real is so much more important than being trendy and popular.

I am Annabeth Chase

You are Annabeth Chase, the intelligent, loyal, and tough girl who rules Camp Half-Blood. Like Annabeth, you have a good head on your shoulders. In a fight, everyone would want you on their side because you are a force to be reckoned with. You are a good friend and an attractive girl.

January 29

2023: Asphyxiating on your own farts.You are looking to lose some weight and your friend recommends an all cabbage diet. For the past month you've been eating nothing but cabbage. While leaving work late one evening, the elevator gets stuck with you inside it. You're alone and call for help. The rescue team is across town helping with another emergency, so the operator tells you that you have to wait. Ten hours go by and your, um..."gas emissions" fill the elevator with noxious fumes. You pass out and suffocate.

You are stupid.

You have passed the stupid test with flying colors. That is to say, you are completely stupid.

Stewie Griffin

You are Stewie Griffin! You're an evil genius with a strong desire to, shall we say, 'eliminate' certain people, including your mother Lois. You are intelligent, calculating and bossy, yet still possess a childish manner. You love your teddy bear Rupert, are fascinated by Teletubbies and enjoy making fun of your father Peter. World domination could be yours...so go for it!

Hell

I hope you like things hot, stuffy, and agonizing, because you're well on your way to Hotel Hell - where you don't ever check out and the TV is stuck on Teletubbies. May I suggest canceling your reservation with a good deed or two? Maybe join the boy scouts, or help that old lady with her groceries...hmm?

You were Vlad the Impaler

You were Vlad the Impaler, you mass murdering maniac, you! Known for impaling his enemies, his opposition to the Ottoman Empire, and his supposed inspiration for Bram Stoker's Dracula, Vlad Dracula was a force to be reckoned with. Like Vlad, you want what you want, when you want it, and you won't settle for anything less. You are a powerful person, with a strong will and an iron fist. You have a well-known reputation, and probably a nasty one at that. I wouldn't want to meet you in a dark alley.

I Would Be an Amazing US President

Hail to the Chief! Following in the footsteps of presidential greats like Abraham Lincoln and George Washington, you are someone who is smart, open-minded, engaging and approachable. You believe in a strong foreign policy, upholding human rights and that education is America's greatest investment in its future. Kudos to you Mr. or Ms. President. Let's just hope you run for re-election!

I am Mrs. Jasper Hale

You are perfect for Jasper. You are caring and whimsical and have a strong personality. You can be passionate, and dramatic, but that's okay, since Jasper knows exactly how to calm you down

I Smell Like the Ocean to Edward Cullen

Your unique and adventurous spirit comes through in your scent. You smell wild and fresh, and Edward thinks you smell like the Ocean. Your scent surprises him. He's never smelled someone so lovely.

Four-Leaf Clover

I love luck and luck loves me. Luck is on my side, and I'm going to do what I can to keep it that way.

I am who in the twilight books

You're Carlisle Cullen - You are very intelligent and have high moral standards. You truly care about people and helping them. Your knack for solving problems and pleasing two warring sides makes you unique and a desirable friend to have, even if sometimes you have to tell people what they might not like hearing.

I got Draco:)!

Name: Aaliyah Smith
Age-16/17
Year-Same as the Golden Trio
House-Syltherin
Best Friends-Draco Malfoy, Gregory Goyle, Vincent Crabbe and Pansy Parkinson
Boyfriend-Draco Malfoy
Ex Boyfriend-Harry Potter
Patronus-Rabbit
Appearance-Long, Dark Brown hair, and Brown eyes
Blood-Half Blood
Background-You have a little sister called Amy, and she isnt a wizard, it's just you and your mum. When your dad found out your mum was a witch he nearly fainted but because he loved you all so much he decided to stay with you. You were brought up in Wales and you still live there and you love it, you had a boyfriend there called Brad and every time you come back from Hogwarts he comes to your house and pelts your windows with stones, to find out where you've been and why you broke up with him. You tell him the same story every single time. You go to a boarding school so a long distance relationship won't work for you:P
Opinions:
Gryffindor
Harry-She's nice and very pretty, but she broke up with me for Malfoy don't know what she sees in him:/
Ron- She's such a nice girl, why is she in Slytherin again?
Hermione-She's very bright:) and kind.
Gryffindor Boys-She's fit!!!
Gryffindor Girls-She's so nice and kind and very pretty.
HufflePuff Boys-She's alright.
HufflePuff Girls- She's nice and pretty.
Cedric- She stunning, can I say this? I'm gonna say it anyway, she has a nice bottom:L
Susan Bones-She helped me with my DADA homework. Genius!...
Ravenclaw Boys-She's pretty and kind:)
Ravenclaw Girls-She is dead nice and always looking out for so many people.
Luna-She is very kind and sweet, she comes to the forbidden forest and hangs out ei the Thestrals with me. Also since she's been with Draco he's never mean to me, and doesn't hex me anymore:) which is always a good sign.
Cho-Well I'm happy she and Harry broke up he's mine... So she scored major bonus friend points by doing that. And she's pretty and very friendly.
Slytherin Boys-She's a fit Slytherin
Slythering Girls-Well we like her, she's so nice and funny and stunning.
Draco-I love her to pieces she's so amazing, and brilliant :)
Your love story-
You were in the Slytherin common room and everyone was playing seven minutes in heaven. You were studying, but Draco was forcing you to play one round. So you got out of you chair, and went to sit by Draco. You pulled out a name from the hat and it happened to be Draco, inside you were secretly happy. You two walked towards the closet slowly before Crabbe pushed you two in. You landed face to face.
"Aaliyah, how do you feel about me? Because I really like you,"
"Errrr... Let me explain," you grabbed onto his neck.
"This should answer your question," you said smiling. You started to kiss hi, with turned into full snogging. You were in there for 8minutes until Goyle opened the door.
"Opppss..." he laughed and you to left the closet.
"Aaliyah will you be my girlfriend," he asked.
"Of course," you answered and you started to kiss again.
"Ooooo..." everyone oooed.
"This is such a rubbish game," Pansy shouted storming out the room.
Draco smiled and so did everyone else.

What do your eyes say about you

Deep...deeeepp

Your eyes are so deep, you could get lost in them! You are constantly calm, and your eyes totally say that about you! Just dont be surprised if the opposite sex is always trying to get you to look their way, cause when you look at people, all their problems melt away!

What Secret Are you Hiding

The secret your keeping is that you would rather be alone than in a big group.

This is not a bad secret! So if your thinking that it is, stop thinking that! Your more of the kind of person who would rather be writing, reading, or maybe even drawing, than out at a party or at the movies. This isn't a bad thing, it just means that your maybe a little shy, or you don't feel like doing other things. But many of people are hiding the same secret so your not alone! =)

Month one

Mommy I am only 8 inches long but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy I'm a boy!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. He is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped. Two more eyes that will never see. Two more hands that will never touch. Two more legs that will never run. One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

God totally owns fanfiction, everyone on it, every thought concerning it, every thought otherwise in the world, every particle in the world and universe, Is and loving and amazingly forgiving (takes a dramatic gasp of air and continues) has power and wisdom beyond even our wildest dreams, and DOES EXIST. If you agree, please, do copy and paste.

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you can read that please put it in your profile.

TRAGIC POEM:

Her name was Auroura She was only five This is what happened When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk her mom was an addict her parents kept her Locked in an attic

Her only friend was a little toy bear It was old and worn out and had patches of hair

She always talked to it when no one's around She lays there and hugs it not a peep of sound

Until her parents unlock the door some more and more pain she’ll have to endure

A bruise on her leg a scar on her face why would she be in such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear And softly cries She loves her parents But they want her to die

She sits in the corner Quiet but thinking, " God, why? Why is My life always sinking? "

Such a bad life For a sad little kid She'd get beaten and beaten For anything she did

Then one night Her mom came home high The poor child was hit and slapped As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly Grabbed for a blade It was sharp and pointy One that she made

She thrusted the blade Right in her chest, " You deserve to die You worthless pest! "

The mom walked out Leaving the girl slowly dying She grabbed her bear And again started crying

Police showed up At the small little house They quickly barged in Everything was as quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly Opened a door To find the sad little girl Lying on the floor

It must have been bad To go through so much harm But at least she died With her best friend in her arms

If you hate child abuse then repost this on your profile. If you don't then you have no soul!!

I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back.

The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The Cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."

Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''

The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''

Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas.

She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."

His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''

My heart nearly stopped.

The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall."

Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me."

"I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."

Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''

"OK" he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.

The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"

Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!''

"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''

"My mommy loves white roses."

A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.

Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.

The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma.

Was this the family of the little boy?

Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away.

I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.

She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.

I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine.

HOMOPHOBIA IS GAY

I am the boy who never finished school because I was called a fag everyday.

I am the girl who got kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I was a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because no one will hire a transseaxual.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they wouldn't allow my partner of 27 years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up to the nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family i have ever had. I wished they could adopt me.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before my high school graduation. It was just too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one bedroom for two men.

I am the one person who does not know which bathroom to use so the management doesn't come for me.

I am the mother who is not even allowed to see the children I bore, nursed and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the father who never hugged my son because I grew up afraid to show affection to males.

I am the Home Ec teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians could teach it.

I am the woman who died when the EMTs stopped treating me as soon as they realized i was transsexual.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because i don't believe, but because they closed the doors to my kind.

I am the girl ashamed to tell my own friends that I am a lesbian because they make fun of them.

I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men said they needed to 'teach me a lesson'.

I am the person who needs to hide what this world needs the most: love.

IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG- REPOST THIS

O_O_O_O_O_O It's wrong to do this to people! And it's wrong for people to feel this way!

V_V_V_V_V_V_V Don't judge people by their sexual preference :c Tis not right!

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr./Mrs.

REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn … we really messed up … but that sure was fun!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.

REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it’s yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.

REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.

REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.

REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what’s wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE FRIENDS: Make you say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.

REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore this.

REAL FRIENDS: Will repost

My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend than copy this to your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different which is the same as unique, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it copy and paste this into your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

if you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever said something that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull (or vice versa) copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you've ever walked into a door (or lampost) copy this onto your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile :D

If you have ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile.

92 percent of American teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch/American Eagle told them it was uncool to breathe. If you are one of the 8 percent who would stand there and laugh, copy this into your profile.

65 percent of Teenagers spend more time watching TV rather then read,.If you are part of the 35 percent who read more that watch TV then cut and paste this to your Profile.

A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know ands wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

(although sometimes I accidentally find myself spell your and not you're but I do fix it because I know the difference!)

If you think Preps travel in packs, copy and paste this into your profile

(its so beautiful What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:

When she walks away from you mad, follow her
When she stares at your mouth, Kiss her
When she pushes you or hit's you, Grab her and don't let go
When she starts cussing at you, Kiss her and tell her you love her
When she's quiet, Ask her what's wrong
When she ignores you, Give her your attention
When she pulls away, Pull her back
When you see her at her worst, Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying, Just hold her and don't say a word
When you see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared, Protect her
When she lays her head on your shoulder, Tilt her head up and kiss her
When she steals your favorite hat, Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
When she teases you, Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesn't answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay
When she looks at you with doubt, Back yourself up
When she says that she likes you, she really does more than you could understand
When she grabs at your hands, Hold hers' and play with her fingers
When she bumps into you, bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does
When she misses you, she's hurting inside
When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away
When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers
When she repost this bulletin, she wants you to read it
Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.
When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
Tease her and let her tease you back
Stay up all night with her when she's sick
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
Give her the world
Let her wear your clothes
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her
Let her know she's important
Kiss her in the pouring rain
When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking babe?"

Girls are like apples

on trees. The best ones

are at the top of the tree.

The boys don't want to reach

for the good ones because they

are afraid of falling and getting hurt.

Instead, they just get the rotten apples

from the ground that aren't as good,

but easy. So the apples at the top think

something is wrong with them, when in

reality, they're amazing. They just

have to wait for the right boy to

come along, the one who's

brave enough to

climb all

the way

to the top

of the tree

all girls copy and paste

If you think that it's not fair that the guys in manga and anime are almost always better than the guys in the real world, copy and paste this in your profile! Then add your name. List: Mit-chan007, Ni-Chan, vampgirl8, Setsuki Angel Princess, KatiechanXoxoXSesshoukun, DarkGoddessKagome, Ryu Pendragon, Akuma-Death-Child,Sneaky Lunitic Spy

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

If you've ever tripped on your own two feet copy and paste this in your profile.

If you hate obnoxious ,snobby people PLEASE copy and paste this in your profile.

Chocolate chip cookies are the best! If you agree C&P!!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy and paste

20 Things to do at Wal-Mart

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera; & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "go, pikachu, go!"

17. Challenge people to duels in the back aisles with wrapping paper tubes.

18. Have a conversation with yourself loud enough so that people in the other aisles can hear you.

19. Throw things over one aisle into another one.

20. Mark out price tags with a sharpie.

(\ _ /)
(O.o )

This is Bunny.
Copy Bunny into your
profile to help him on his way to world domination

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Archangel's Requiem, Lady Sakura of the Fated,Soul Stance, Raven Wolfmoon, iheartmwpp, dracosnumber1girl, SMARTALIENQT, Luthien Saralonde, Xiaahandrus, Zenerific1, narutoyaoifan(everyday for the last 3 months), Ryu Pendragon, Akuma-Death-Child,Sneaky Lunitic Spy

Repost this if you laughed...
"Everywhere we go
Everywhere we go
People wanna know
People wanna know
Who we are
Who we are
So we kill them
So we kill them
We’re Akatsuki
We’re Akatsuki
The Mighty Akatsuki
The Mighty Akatsuki
We’re GRRRRREAT!"- a naruto fanfiction

If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile.

If you think that Sasuke from Naruto completely has to have the nick-name ‘Duck Butt Hair Dude', copy this to your profile while laughing your butt off.

If you have ever wanted to kill someone (albeit a man in a purple and green dinosaur suit known as 'Barney the Dinosaur', any sound-nin from Naruto, George Bush, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, or any other fool) then realized murder is illegal then copy and paste this into your profile.

I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it. If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile.

There are three kinds of people: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen, and those who don't know what the heck is happening.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried slamming a revolving door...

It takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes four to extend my middle finger and tell you to bite me

If you have ever fallen up the stairs, copy this into your profile.

If you ever forgot your name, copy and paste this into your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone.

Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever pushed on a door marked pull or vice versa, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile.

If you have embarrasing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.

Oposites attract and artists belong together. Copy and paste this into your profile if you believe in SasoXDei.

At random moments, I tack "un" on the end of my sentences

If you have ever burned any sort of food in the microwave, oven, toaster, or on the stove, copy and paste this into your profile.

I bet 93 of you people that read this won't repost

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

Love vs. Sex

A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit
some friends one
evening
and time passed quickly as each shared
their
various experiences of the past year.

She ended up staying longer than
planned,
and
had to walk home alone. She wasn't
afraid
because it was a small town and she lived
only
a
few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm
trees,
Diane asked God to keep her safe from
harm
and
danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a
short
cut to her house, she decided to take it.

However, halfway down the alley she
noticed
a
man standing at the end as though he
were
waiting
for her.

She became uneasy and began to pray,
asking
for
God's protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
and
security wrapped round her, she felt as
though
someone was walking with her.

When she reached the end of the alley,
she
walked right past the man and arrived
home
safely.

The following day, she read in the
newspaper
that
a young girl had been raped in the same
alley
just
twenty minutes after she had been there.

Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and
the
fact
that it could have been her, she began to
weep.

Thanking the Lord for her safety and to
help
this
young woman, she decided to go to the
police
station.

She felt she could recognize the man, so
she
told
them her story.

The police asked her if she would be
willing to
look
at a lineup to see if she could identify
him.

She agreed and immediately pointed out
the
man
she had seen in the alley the night
before.

When the man was told he had been
identified,
he
immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked Diane for her bravery
and
asked if there was anything they could do
for
her.

She asked if they would ask the man one
question.

Diane was curious as to why he had not
attacked
her.

When the policeman asked him, he
answered, "Because she wasn't alone.
She
had
two tall men walking on either side of
her."

Amazingly, whether you believe or not,
you're
never alone. Did you know that 98 of
teenagers
will not stand up for God?

Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly
believe
in
God..

PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you
no matter what...and if you stand up for him he will
stand up for you. I bet 93 of you people that read this won't repost

A ninja waits until the dead of night, when the enemy sleeps and drops his guard, when his weapons lie forgotten in the stillness of the night, that is the moment for a ninja to strike. Copy this into your profile if you're a Ninja!

The right guy is the guy who...

calls you beautiful instead of hot,

who calls you back when you hang up on him,

who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.

Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy that kisses your forhead,

who keeps your picture in his wallet,

who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,

who holds your hand in front of all his freinds,

who thinks your beautiful without makeup,

one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,

THE one who turns to his friends and says THATS HER!

So, here's how it works:

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend your cool... and alot of the songs fit with the setting

Opening Credits: 15 minuets-Rodney Atkins

Waking Up: the ballad of resurrection Joe and Rosa whore-Rob Zombie

First Day At School:she used to be mine-Brooks and Dunn

Falling In Love:Fergalicious-Fergie

Fight Song:Nasty Girl-Destiny's Child

Breaking Up:I Wanna Talk About Me-Toby Kieth

Prom night:My Alien-Simple PLan

Life:Are we the waiting-Green day

Mental Breakdown:April 29, 1992 (Miami)-Sublime

Driving:Dangerously in love-Destiny's Child

Flashback:When Moonshine And dynamite collide-Jackyl

Getting back together:The Gambler-Kenny Rogers

Wedding: Courtesy Of The Red, White And Blue (The Angry American)-Toby Kieth

Birth of Child:Baby Boy-Beyonce

Final Battle:Burritos-Sublime

Funeral Song:Don't Let Me Be The Last To Know-Britney Spears *please make sure im one of the first =)*

Final Credits: Under My Voodoo-Sublime

some of theses don't make sense *shakes head in bewilderment* but knowing me they are true...=)

YOU'RE A 90'S KID IF:

You can finish this 'ice ice _'
You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World, Felix the cat, The Tick...AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."
You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not
If you remember seeing hot tub bubbles make bubbly sounds before every music video on VH1.
when everything was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.
You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.
"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.
Captain Planet. He's a Hero.

You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.
You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.
You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.
You remember those Where's Waldo books.

You remember eating Warheads.
You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.
You remember Ring Pops.
You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.
If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"
When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.

Making those little paper cootie-catcher things, and then predicting your life with them.
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere.
. . . Furbies
Saved By The Bell was the coolest show ever!
You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.
And Windows 95 was the best.
You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.
Michael Jordan was a king.
YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!

All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.
You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.
You collected those Beanie Babies.
Mortal Kombat was awesome--the game and the movie

Carebears
Gak was the coolest stuff invented.
Lambchop's song never ended.
The old dollar bills.
Silver dollars, which were cool to have.
You remember a time before the WB.

You collected all the Troll dolls
You had to read Weekly Reader's in class.
If you even know what an original walkman is.
You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it?!"
You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!

You remember Highlight's magazine.
You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.
You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.
Before the MySpace frenzy . . .
Before the Internet & text messaging . . .

Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .
Before MIKE JONES . . .
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .
Before Spongebob . . .

Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was The new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off of our walkmans.
When gameboy was a brick.
You did MASH to figure out your future
When you weren't cool unless you had a Starter jacket.
Way back.
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!!

Post this in your profile if you remember these days . . . .

Girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of brake failure.

Two people were on it and only one survived.

The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his brakes weren't working but he didn't want the girl to know.

Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him.

Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died.

Copy this into your profile if you would do this for someone you love.

She said that she wanted to get high- he took her to the tallest hill in town.

She said that she wanted to stay up all night & drink- he gave her a 12 pack of caffeinated pepsi & said ‘drink up’
She said that she wanted to shoot herself- he gave her a water gun, put her finger on the trigger & aimed it at her face.
She said that she wanted to cut herself up- he took a polaroid of her, handed it to her along with scissors & had her cut it up.
She said that she wanted to see her blood- he took her to get her ears pierced.
She said that she wanted to cry herself to sleep- he had her watch a sad romantic movie before bed.
She said that she wanted to be alone- he gave her a nametag that sad "my name is: ALONE."
She said that she wanted to have someone there to take care of her, always; he asked her when he wasn't

Sweet

Words that fix the deepest hurts
tender thoughts that assures self worth
holding on to the one letting go
never allowing alone to hurt
tender caresses and worthwhile hope

Nothing

Bitter regrets of a life in scorn
Tarnished lies leaving broken and torn
promising everything and leaving nothing
take what wanted not whats given
bleeding and bruised cracked and shredded

SweetNothing

pushing deep until complete
hurting and loving embracing everything
penetrating and destroying the mask of fear
erasing the past smashing the present coveting the future
holding on when there's nothing left to hold

LOVE is just a four letter LIE!

I’m a tear.
I’ve been here before.
I know her perfumed fingers.
I know the cold floor.
Every time you leave her;
Every time you don’t call...
When she can’t help herself,
it’s my job to fall.

An unfortunate truth was that the things we want most could come at the wrong times.
If we're lucky, we find them again a second time.
If not, we live with the past and hope for a brighter future.

I'm sorry if I...

CRY too much
SMILE too big
LAUGH alot
SING in the car
DANCE in the rain
SLEEP on the floor
TALK too loud
TRY too hard

Just remember I'm me not you.

95 percent of teenagers would be crying if Miley Cyrus was on the edge of the Rialto Tower.
Paste this to your profile if you are 1 of the 5 percent saying "JUMP BITCH!"

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?" copy this into your profile

92 percent of the teen population would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch or Hollister said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Repost if your one if the 8 percent who would be laughing your ass off.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? People call me crazy, which I am, but I'm also random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you ever started an argument with yourself and lost copy this into your profile.

I'm Perfectly N.O.R.M.A.L:

Not

Ordinary

Rarely

Mean

Always

Loud

My NORMAL... Your Insanity

Awesome Quotes:

Life sucks and then you die.

Bite me.

Having the love of your life say, 'we can still be friends', is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them. (hell yea!)

Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES.

I stay as confused as a gangster with a skateboard.

Ran with scissors, and lived!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 muscles to smile, but only 4 muscles to reach out and slap someone.

It doesn't matter whether the glass is half empty or half full, just drink it and get it over with.

I'm not afraid of Death. What's he gonna do, kill me?

You've got questions. We've got dancing paperclips.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?

He who laughs last didn't get it.

Dear Heart, I met a boy today. Prepare to shatter.

I'm not afraid of death; I'm afraid of something much worse... my mother"

This is a quote I found on gay marriage:

"And yet to me this vote is horrible. Horrible. Because this isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics. This is about the human heart, and if that sounds corny, so be it. Why does this matter to you? What is it to you? In a time of impermanence and fly-by-night relationships, these people over here want the same chance at permanence and happiness that is your option. They don't want to deny you yours. They don't want to take anything away from you. They want what you want—a chance to be a little less alone in the world.

Only now you are saying to them—no. You can't have it on these terms. Maybe something similar. If they behave. If they don't cause too much trouble. You'll even give them all the same legal rights—even as you're taking away the legal right, which they already had. A world around them, still anchored in love and marriage, and you are saying, no, you can't marry. What if somebody passed a law that said you couldn't marry?

I keep hearing this term "re-defining" marriage. If this country hadn't re-defined marriage, black people still couldn't marry white people. Sixteen states had laws on the books which made that illegal in 1967. 1967...

You know, just like marriages today in California are not legally recognized, if the people are gay.

And uncountable in our history are the number of men and women, forced by society into marrying the opposite sex, in sham marriages, or marriages of convenience, or just marriages of not knowing, centuries of men and women who have lived their lives in shame and unhappiness, and who have, through a lie to themselves or others, broken countless other lives, of spouses and children, all because we said a man couldn't marry another man, or a woman couldn't marry another woman. The sanctity of marriage.

How many marriages like that have there been and how on earth do they increase the "sanctity" of marriage rather than render the term, meaningless?

What is this, to you? Nobody is asking you to embrace their expression of love. But don't you, as human beings, have to embrace... that love? The world is barren enough...

And here are people overjoyed at the prospect of just that chance, and that work, just for the hope of having that feeling. With so much hate in the world, with so much meaningless division, and people pitted against people for no good reason, this is what your religion tells you to do? With your experience of life and this world and all its sadness’s, this is what your conscience tells you to do?... This is the second time in ten days I find myself concluding by turning to, of all things, the closing plea for mercy by Clarence Darrow in a murder trial.

But what he said fits what is really at the heart of this:

"I was reading last night of the aspiration of the old Persian poet, Omar-Khayyam," he told the judge. It appealed to me as the highest that I can vision. I wish it was in my heart, and I wish it was in the hearts of all: So I be written in the Book of Love; I do not care about that Book above. Erase my name, or write it as you will, So I am written in the Book of Love."- Keith Olbermann on the Prop 8 issue

If you believe in God, but think a lot of stuff in the Bible is contradictory bull, post this to your profile.

If you believe God doesn't give a crap whether you screw guys, girls or ducks, post this to your profile because LOVE IS LOVE!

If you believe Allah, Brahma, God, Yahweh, Shiva, and the Absolute are all just synonyms for the same divine presence, post this to your profile.

If you think extremists should get the sticks out of their asses and check into mental health clinics, post this to your profile.

If you believe that no one is born evil, but that evil is very real, post this to your profile.

If you hate what abortion is, but understand that sometimes it's just necessary (i.e. when the mom could die), post this to your profile.

I am a firm believer in complete equality for everyone. Haters can go fuck themselves. Being gay, transsexual, or bisexual doesn't mean you're a bad person or that something's wrong with you. All it means is that you have different tastes and preferences. The same goes for people of different skin colors, people of various religions, and people of various paths of life.

Stop the hate!

I found this on Twicked's profile, and yeah, I cried.

Try Not to Cry:

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, and I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know it’s true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,
Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on, Maybe people will cry, Just keep this in your heart, For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as
"Try Not To Cry"
2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how
cold-hearted you really are...

Like I said, I cried. Thanks though, whoever started that. I appreciate it, and I hope others do too.

To Those Who Were Lost, rest in peace.

Hopefully this will cheer you up some. It did for me.

One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers

I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I called your boyfriend gay, and he hit me with his purse.

Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hates that.

friends are God's way of apologizing for family

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

He who laughs last didn't get it.

All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down, stay put and shut up.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.

People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door.

my friends say 'look a birdie' behind me in the lunch room then my goldfish are gone!!

people like u r the reasons we have middle fingers

you’re a great friend but, if zombies are chasing us I’m tripping you...

But if vampires r chasing us, trip me, I’ll b fine!

good friends don’t let you do stupid things...alone

No, I won't go to Hell! It has a restraining order against me

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

Life isn’t passing me by; it's trying to run me over

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking creatures?

The statistics of insanity is that 1 of every 4 people have a mental illness. Look at your three best friends; if they're okay, then it's you

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive

It doesn't matter what temperature the room is. It's always room-temperature.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

If you can keep your head while other people are losing theirs, you probably don't fully understand the situation.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.

-Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience

I'm not afraid of Death, what's it gonna do kill me?

It's always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I've found it?

My friends and I went to Hell once, just to see if we could. Then we got kicked out for pranking everyone and beating up the Devil. Pfft, crybabies.

When the world ends in 2012, most people will go to either heaven or hell. People like me and my friends will still be on Earth partying.

Some people were just born to confuse the world (more than it already is). We take our job very seriously.

I have a ton of friends, Mom! 70% are inanimate objects, 10% are fictional people, and the last 20% are psychopaths.

Best Quotes:

Me: When we were born, we confused the world

Stormy: Please, the world was already confused before we were born.

Me: Yes, but when we were born we confused it even more"

1111111111111111111111111111111111111

Me: So I'm watching SchoolHouse Rock and they mentioned a grandmother from Russia and a grandfather from Italy coming to America and getting together. What does that make us, Italy?

Italy: *holds up jar labeled Vodka Pasta Sauce* THAT is what it makes us."

Me: Oh my god!"

1111111111111111111111111111111111111

Me: Women have hips.

Austria: Way to point out the obvious.

Me: No, no, listen. Women have hips, men do not. Men are just... Straight.

Stormy: Really? (sarcasm) Are you saying that... what, men are just columns, only there for structural support?

Me: Yes! Men are rectangles. Like cabinets.

Stormy: (conceding) Or possibly circles.

Me: True, but circular guys are rectangular deep down. Then you get the guys with pot bellies that are rectangles with tumors.

Stormy: Rectangles with tumors?

Me: Yes, cancerous rectangles.

I got these from another writer's profile, which asked me to post them in my profile, so here:

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you and/or your best friend is insane, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile.

If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile.

If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you think everyone's out of their minds, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever conversed out loud with the voices in your head and had people look at you like you were insane, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are like me and totally support homosexuals, copy and paste this into your profile. They are people just like you and me, so don't hate them just because their sexuality is different.

85 percent of the people who read Harry Potter think Luna Lovegood is crazy. If you are part of the 15 percent that think she rules, copy this into your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Wicked that you randomly start quoting it, copy this into your profile! (Randomness rules!)

If hearing the opening music for Wicked gave you shivers, copy this into your profile.

If you cried when you saw For Good, copy this into your profile. (Both times!)

If you've ever felt hopelessly misunderstood due to your obsession with wicked, copy this into your profile.

If you think Elphaba really is beautiful, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you talk to yourself or fictional characters copy/paste this into your profile (I spend all my spare time hanging out with fictional characters)

If you ever wondered who made up all the 'copy this into your profile' thingies then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile

If you are as wicked as Elphaba, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions when you probably should be doing something else, copy this onto your profile

If your response to that is “You say that like it’s a bad thing,” copy paste this into your profile

-You can relate almost anything to Wicked, even if it is distant.

If you've ever seen Wicked live, copy and paste this in your profile.

-You wish you had a Goat teacher like Doctor Dillamond.

-You refer to the Scarecrow and the Wicked Witch of the West as Fiyero and Elphaba

If you hate that little brat from Kansas and her dog, Dodo, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you like singing songs at random points in the day, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects, copy and paste this into your profile

92% of teens have moved on to rap! if your still one of the 8 that still listens to REAL music then put this on ur profile

Imagine this!

Nessa, Boq, Galinda, Fiyero, and Elphaba are all sitting at a table at dinner.

Nessa looks at Boq.

Boq looks at Galinda.

Galinda looks at Fiyero.

Fiyero looks at Elphaba.

Elphaba looks at a book

What we have here is a love pentagon!

If you are crazy and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

93 percent of teenagers would have an emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you are part of the 7 percent that would say "What was your first clue, Sherlock?” copy this onto your profile.

I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge; I get a paddle boat and save your sorry butt.

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that stuff up in two seconds. That's why when I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you"

If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever wanted to just SLAP someone, copy this into your profile.

95% of the teenage population would be in a crisis if Miley Cyrus, Justin Beiber, the Jonas Brothers, and Selena Gomez were on top of a 5 story building. Copy and paste this into your profile if you're one of the 5% that would be screaming into a bullhorn, "JUMP, BITCHES, JUMP!!!"

Stop the Pairing Wars!

By copying and pasting this in your profile, you vow to respect other pairings and the people that like them.

You shalt not insult them, explain why they can't be together, or say that they would rather be with someone else.

You shalt have your opinions but shalt not insult pairings.You shalt avoid them if you hate them.

You shalt keep an open mind about stories even if you despise the pairing.

You shalt paste this in your profile.

How to Know if You're Addicted to Fanfiction

10. You no longer refer to comments as "comments." They are now known only as "reviews."

9. Pens are for idiots and you wouldn't be caught dead with one. How on earth are you supposed to erase when you want to rewrite?

8. You start laughing at the most inopportune times because you remembered something funny from a fanfic.

7. You pretend to take notes, but really you're getting a head start on your latest ficlet.

6. Short disclaimers are for losers. Whoever thinks up the craziest (or goriest O.O) gets a cookie.

5. You can't write for English class because you've used up all your ideas for fanfiction.

4. A story idea isn't a story idea. It's a plot bunny.

3. You hear people talking about a ship (the water variety), and you frenchin jump, like, five feet in the air and act like you've never heard the word used outside of the fanfiction context.

2. Whenever something inspiring happens, you screech, "Ooh! Fanfic idea!" and then immerse yourself in writing for the next three hours.

1. You repost this onto your profile! :)

Its official people, I'm ADDICTED TO FANFICTION.NET!!

Elphaba rules!! SHE JUST DOES, AND ANYONE WHO DENIES IT IS FREAKIFIED!!

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

REASONS TO JOIN THE DARK SIDE (If you wish to join add this list to your profile):

1. We have cookies (last I checked there was hot chocolate too)

2. Meet the recruitment bunny!

3. You get a cool dark cape that covers your whole body!

4. You get a really cool crazy laugh! Practice with me people: MWAHAHAHAHA cough cough!

5. You get to walk out of shadows mysteriously and freak out the good guy!

6. One word: UNDERLINGS! Someone to get things for you when you're too lazy to do them yourself... Now that's the life

7. Money Money Money: Ever notice that we are usually much richer than the good guys?

The Six Truths of Life:

1. You can't lick all of your teeth with your tongue.

2. You just tried to do the above.

3. The first truth is a lie.

4. You're smiling now because you're realizing you're an idiot.

5. You'll copy this into your profile for some other sucker to read it.

6. There's still a stupid smile on your face.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.

TO ALL THOSE WHO THINK HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG AND WANT TO FIGHT FOR A BETTER FUTURE FOR OUR GAY AND LESBIAN FRIENDS, PLEASE REPOST THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE.

I am the girl who got kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
-I am the prostitute working on the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
-I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful tear-filled nights.
-I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
-I am the foster-child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had.
-I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that put me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
-I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating from high-school. It was just too much to bear.
-We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
-I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting management called on me.
-I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
-I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system suddenly grow cold and distant when they found out that my abusive partner is also a woman.
-I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support to turn to because I am male.
-I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
-I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me only lesbians do that.
-I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
-I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not alwyas have to deal with society hating me.
-I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
-I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most; love.
-I am the son who is afraid of telling his loving, Christian parents I love another male.

Stupid Labels

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

Copy & Paste this to your profile if you think those are all extremely stupid labels

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Ask for something to eat when over your place
BEST FRIENDS: Raid your fridge

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "THAT WAS AWSOME! LET'S DO IT AGAIN!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Won’t tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when you’re not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when you've been dumped
BEST FRIENDS: Have a shovel at the ready

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your shit and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story, with real quotes!

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS:Would ignore this letter
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crappp!

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"

24 things to do in an elevator

1. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead while muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
4. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go 'plink' at the bottom.
9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
10. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, no, not now, bleeped motion sickness!"
11. Meow occasionally.
12. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
13. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
14. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
15. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to the other passengers 'through' it.
16. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"
17. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
18. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push the red buttons.
19. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
20. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your 'personal space.'
21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
22. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
23. Wear 'X-Ray Specs' and leer suggestively at other passengers.
24. Stop at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on.

19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Drugs".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. dont use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE :
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION - RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

I gave up Jesus for lent

I never finish anyth

Have a nice cup of shut the hell up

I love math- 11=11

Trust me. I'm a Jedi.

Jesus Saves- passes to Noah- He shoots! He scooores!

Bad spellers of the world, UNTIE!

I reject your reality and substitute my own

Im not short! Just fun size.

Welcome to the dark side. Why are you surprised we lied about the cookies?

Global warming killed Frosty

Screw world peace- I want a pony

The police never think its as funny as we do

Forget love- I'd rather fall in chocolate

Dyslexics have more nuf

I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minuet of it.

I don't get drunk, I get awesome

That's what she said

I love cats. But I can't eat a whole one.

“Be yourself, don't take anyone's shit, and never let them take you alive.”

"Don't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling."

“Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything's different.”

“Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music.”

“We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”

“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.”

"The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them”

"If you’re feeling alone, know that the world can be a lonely place but it would be lonelier without you in it."

"Anderson, don't talk out loud. You lower the IQ of the whole street."

"Falling is just like flying, but with a more permanent destination."

"The man with the key is king, and honey you should see me in a crown."

"We can't giggle, it's a crime scene."

The SLOGAN meme!

Put your name in, and generate slogan after each question. Generator here! http://thesurrealist.co.uk/slogan.cgi?word=

So Easy, No Wonder Sneaky Lunitic Spy is #1.

1. What do you say to yourself every morning?
The Sneaky Lunitic Spy is Mightier than the Sword.

Hell Yes!

2. What do you want other people to say about you?
Look,Ma, No Sneaky Lunitic Spy!

Umm but don't i want to be there...

3. Someone asked you out, your answer is...
You Press the Sneaky Lunitic Spy, We Do the Rest.

Um cool i guess...

4. How would you answer a booty call?
Where Do You Want Sneaky Lunitic Spy To Go Today?

Yup I would

5. How would you introduce yourself to someone you really like?
Tonight, Let It Be Sneaky Lunitic Spy.

I would say that

6. To someone you dislike?
My Goodness, My Sneaky Lunitic Spy!

Um No just no

7. You're in a conversation and you suddenly feel the need to pee, how would you excuse yourself?
Nobody Better Lay a Finger on my Sneaky Lunitic Spy.

Um yes if i was eating

8. Your parents ask you why you got home late, you say...
All The Sneaky Lunitic Spy That's Fit To Print.

Yup And then i get in the newspaper =D

9. You're failing a subject, you say...
This Is Not Your Father's Sneaky Lunitic Spy.

aaaahhh ummm no!

10. The love of your life asks you to marry him/her, what do you say?
Snap into a Sneaky Lunitic Spy!

hehe Dirty thought

11. Your bf/gf is breaking up with you, you tell him/her...
Every Sneaky Lunitic Spy Helps.

Um No comment

12. Someone told you you're a jerk, you tell them...
Let Your Fingers Do the Walking Through the Sneaky Lunitic Spy.

Major Dirty thought HAHA

13. What are the best words to describe you?
Thank Sneaky Lunitic Spy It's Friday.

Yes thank me that its Friday the day I'm doing this.

14. If you're going to have a movie about your life, the title is...
The Joy of Sneaky Lunitic Spy.

Not bad, not bad

15. Your last words before you die...
Solutions For a Small Sneaky Lunitic Spy.

um yea death solves everything.

16. Your message to a special someone..
Don't You Just Love Being In Sneaky Lunitic Spy?

No Comment!

17. Title of this post will be...
So Easy, No Wonder Sneaky Lunitic Spy is #1.

1. Severus Snape
2. Harry Potter
3. Albus Dumbldore
4. Minerva McGonagall
5. Voldemort
6. Lily Evans
7. Peter Pettigrew
8. Ron Weasly
9. Remus Lupin
10. Hermione Granger
11. Draco Malfoy
12.Sirius Black

1) Have you read a five/ten fic before?
No, time to go look for one...

2) Do you think three is hot? How hot?
NO HE IS A OLD PERVERT!

3) What would happen if six got one pregnant?
No Sev gets Lily pregnant, NOT Lily getting Sev pregnant

4) Do you recall any good fics about nine?
Yes

5) Would seven and two make a good couple?
If you want it to be abusive then yes, if not then no

6) Four/eight or four/nine?
Niether

7) What would happen if seven discovered three and eight in a secret relationship?
Hope he was never taken along

8) Make a summary of at least twenty words for a two/six fic.
Harry wanted some thing more from life, some thing he wasn't getting in his time. Harry goes to the marauder's area, And is Harry, Harry's dad? Madness ensures.

9). Is there such a thing as a four/ten romantic fluff story?
I think there might be one...

10) Suggest a title for a one/five Hurt/Comfort fic.
"Evil Need Comfort Too" Yup sounds good for a one-shot

Anybody uses this let me know so i can read it

11. What kind of plot would you use for a three/eleven fic?
Draco finally accepts a Lemon Drop.

12. Does anyone on your friends list read number seven het? What about nine slash?
9 Slash i think so the other no or i hope not...

13. Would one want to have sex with twelve?
Who know Severus is a complex man and the line between Love and Hate is VERY thin.

14. If you wrote a two/three/six fic, what would the warning be?
K For extreme Crazyness

15. What pick-up line might eight use on five?
I think Voldemort would kill Ron before he even got a chance to think one up.

16. Challenge: Write a drabblefic for ten/eight.
easy

"I miss Harry, Ron." Hermione said to her best friend and lover. Harry had just been found dead yesterday. Ron sighed and said "I do to Moine. he was my best mate."

the end shortest drabble ever

17) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
Peter would stare in shock that Sirius is Having Sex with Harry.

18) What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One?
Drunken = Madness

19) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
I dunno

20) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
I hope not!

21) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
I'm pretty sure there is one or two...

23) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
RON! HARRY! SEVERUS!

you know the names of people she's having sex with...

24) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
30 minuets ago on 6/8/2012 4:53 P.M.

25) What is Six's super-secret kink?
Dirty talk

26) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
yes sober if he was his mate.

27) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
0.0 NO JUST NO!

28) "One (Severus) and Nine (Remus) are in a happy relationship until Nine (Remus) suddenly runs off with Four (Minerva). One (Severus), broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven (Draco) and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve (Sirius), then follows the wise advice of Five (Voldemort ((would it be wise?)) and finds true love with Two (Harry)." What title would you give this fic?
"True Love Always Wins"

29) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Sick to my stomache

You guy's should do this it is fun and twisted just change charecters and all that!

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping, and you are woken up, shout, "AMEN!"

5.Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to Espresso.

6.In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks Write: For Marijuana

7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.

9. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play Tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

20 And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity ...Copy and Paste this To Make People who read bios Smile.

(Because if there was no insanity, there would be no authors, and we'd have to find some other site to visit.)

WARNING: Do not click on these links if you have a tendency to break things when you run out of patience. Just saying.

Check out this link it is funny but annoying

Check this one out

Not my problem if your mom's favorite antique vase is broken now.

If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but rhetar the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile!

If 75 percent or more of the time you're on Fanfiction instead of studying for tests copy this onto your Profile and add your Name : Natalie668, Brea45, yamiyugi23, PaddyGurl, MischievousCuriosity, Sneaky Lunitic Spy

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever pushed on a door marked pull or vice versa, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the fun of it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are against child abuse, you should copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that hasn't, put this in your profile.

If you've ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy and paste this into your profile.

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't do drugs and never will, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are against animal cruelty put this in your profile.

If you liked Snape after Deathly Hallows copy and paste this in your profile.

If you get too excited for books, movies, etc. to come out copy and paste this in your profile.

If you feel the need to read through someone's profile even when you don't know them, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you miss Fred Weasley from Harry Potter, put this in your profile

If you have ever seen a movie or read a book so many times that you can quote it word for word, and do so at random moments, copy and past this to your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things in your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects, copy this into your profile

If you have a tendency to talk to your self, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think that life without computers is useless, copy and paste this to your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If reality continues to ruin your life, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you believe that fan clubs are the legal way to stalk someone, copy and paste this into your profile

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile

You have said somthing you were thinking out loud without knowing, copy this into your profile.

You have sung stupid/funny songs out loud, while skipping too. Copy and add this into your profile.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.

If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile.

Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If, for no reason, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile (I do this a lot).

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.

If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile. (and in my iPod, and in my CD player, and on the radio. Music is everywhere)

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!

If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who gets excited when you see just two reviews, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like filling your profile with 'copy and paste this into your profile' thingys, then COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

YOUR GUY SIDE:

You love hoodies.
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt

You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.

Sad movies suck.

You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth. (only as i swallow though!)
Sleep with your socks on at night

Total: 13

Your Girl Side

You wear lip gloss/stick.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink.

Go to your mom for advice.
You consider cheerleading a sport.
You hate wearing the color black.
You like hanging out at the mall.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up. (But almost 30 min. of that is trying to get myself awake ;)
You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes. (I don't wear most of them, though)
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it
Like being the star of every thing

Total: 4

I'm more Guy then Girl, and i am a girl, well i am a big tomboy...

Promise to Remember

I promise to remember Harry,

When someone grows up with no love.

I promise to remember Ron,

When someone is jealous.

I promise to remember Hermione,

When I meet someone with wisdom beyond their years.

I promise to remember James and Lily,

when someone dies before their time.

I promise to remember Dumbledore,

At the thought of the greater good.

I promise to "Solemely Swear That I Am Up To No Good",

for Gred, Forge, and Padfoot, of course.

I promise to remember Moony,

And fight for human rights.

I promise to remember Snape,

When my heart fills with remorse.

I promise to remember Narcissa,

When I'd do anything for family.

I promise to remember Dora Tonks,

When someone is over-excited and proud of it.

I promise to remember Hedwig,

who lived and died soaring.

I promise to remember Draco,

When someone is forced to action against their will.

I promise to remember Percy,

When ambition gets the best of me.

I promise to be careful,

For Moody's sake, of course.

I promise to remember Hagrid,

When one is wrongly blamed.

I promise to remember Neville,

when I stand up for what is right.

I promise to remember the Marauders,

When a friend says "Call me and I'll be there."

Yes I promise that I will remember Harry Potter.

Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff.

Slytherins … will push someone else off.

Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase.

Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet.

Stop the Pairing Wars!
By copying and pasting this in your profile, you vow to respect other pairings and the people that like them.
You shalt not insult them, explain why they can't be together, or say that they would rather be with someone else.
You shalt have your opinions but shalt not insult pairings.You shalt avoid them if you hate them.
You shalt keep an open mind about stories even if you despise the pairing.
You shalt paste this in your profile.

RACISM IS WRONG!

Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message.

I AM THE GIRL

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, Twitter, Facebook because i just don't see the appeal. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment),who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one else seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Harry Potter, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her (yet it would be nice) and knows the importance of the little things.

Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: HarryArtemis1220, edwardcullenissosexy, Pixel Alice, ME LOVEY JAZZY, Gandalf the Grey-Edelwiess, DoYouReallySeeMe, Potter's Angels, CelticHeiressFiona, The Love Dragon, I-am-a-slash-addict, Nikkii-Love706, sneaky lunitic spy,

This is a true story. All schools have a class clown, someone that gets on everyones nerves and that no one likes. There was one of these boys in this one school. Nobody liked him at all. He had no friends, the teachers hated him for his disruptiveness, and the students found him annoying beyond belief. He never seemed to care. One day, he had finally stepped on his teachers last nerve. What the teacher did was make everyone in the class stand up and tell the boy something they didn't like about him. As each of the thirty students stood up and said something about him they didn't like, he only sat and didn't seem to mind. All of the students did it.

That day, when school was out, the boy went home, grabbed his dads gun, and shot himself in the head.

If you think that the teacher was to blame, and that what she did was morally wrong and completely shameful, copy and paste this into your profile. Then, if you would have been the one to stand up and say "I'm not going to do this" then add your username to the list. Antire5, EmoWolves of Shadow, Killercat-nya, Juura99, demon-in-training, sneaky lunitic spy,

Take 3 minutes and try this...it will freak you out...BUT NO CHEATING!

This game has a funny/spooky outcome.

Don't read ahead...just do it in order! It's worth a try.

First..get a pen and paper. When you actually choose names, make sure it's people you actually know and go with your first instinct.

Scroll down one line at a time...and don't read ahead or you'll ruin it!

1. First, write the numbers 1 through 11 in a column.

2. Then, beside numbers 1 and 2, write down any two numbers you want.

3. Beside the 3 and 7, write down the names of members of the opposite sex.

4. Write anyone's name (like friends or family...) in the 4th, 5th, and 6th spots.

5. Write down four song titles in 8,9,10, and 11. (Go with your instincts!)

6. Finally, make a wish.

And now the key for the game...

1. You must tell (the number in space 2) people about this game.

2. The person in space 3 is the one that you love.

3. The person in 7 is one you like but can't work out.

4. You care most about the person you put in 4.

5. The person you name in number 5 is the one who knows you very well.

6. The person you name in 6 is your lucky star.

7. The song in 8 is the song that matches with the person in number 3.

8. The title in 9 is the song for the person in 7.

9. The tenth space is the song that tells you most about YOUR mind.

10. 11 is the song telling you how you feel about life

GIRLS DON’T REALIZE THESE THINGS:

I'm sorry
That I bought you roses—to tell you that I like you.

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect—not to sleep with you when you were drunk.

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough to—"satisfy" your wants.

I'm sorry
That I open your car door and pull out your chair—like I was raised.

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough—to be "your guy".

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice—not a jerk.

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account—to buy you expensive things.

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home cuddling with you—instead of at a club.

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you—than just screw you like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to—but never good enough to date.

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car—but when we went out you went home with another guy.

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere—but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend.

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat—only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around.

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours—instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work.

I'm sorry
That you can't realize…I've been the one all along…

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this—but don't care

But most of all…

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it—I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you—instead of spending time with my family.

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you—and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right—and nothing that I do is good enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am—that you want me to be something better.

I'm sorry
That I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different—but never judge you.

I'm sorry
That I cared.

And I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head, "WHY WON’T YOU JUST GIVE ME A CHANCE?!".

Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'.

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'.

SAD STUFF :'(

A little girl holding the hand of her orphanage nanny looks up at the sky and asks "What are those little lights in the sky?"

Two figures stand in front of a little girl's grave, crying over their dead daughter.

A sister shields her little brother from her father's drunken rage. Her brother runs away on the day of her funeral.

A man getting on a bus walks under a black sky, the stars hidden by light pollution. He has only seen stars in movies and pictures.

A little boy holds his mother, trying to keep her warm and dry from the rain dripping into their cardboard box.

A girl stands on the street in front of her house in the snow because she told her parents that she was lesbian.

A Jewish man hides his face in public from fear of getting harmed.

The neighbors hear screaming and crying in the apartment beside them, and had seen the woman with an empty bottle of alcohol walking towards the room, but they just pull their blankets tighter around them.

A girl sleeps on a park bench because she got pregnant and let her parents know.

Someone kicks mud in the face of a man asking for a spare bit of change. The man couldn't get a job because he was gay.

An African American woman stops going to church because they don't accept her race.

A mother cries as the police drag her sobbing daughter away. Her wife comes outside and hugs her. The police had said she was an unfit mother because she was lesbian.

Did you know...

kissing is healthy.

bananas are good for period pain.

it's good to cry.

chicken soup actually makes you feel better.

94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.

lying is actually unhealthy.

you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.

89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.

it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.

chocolate will make you feel better.

most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

a good friend never judges.

a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.

boys aren't worth your tears.

we all love surprises.

Now... make a wish.

Wish REALLY hard!

WISH WISH WISH WISH

Your wish has just been received.

Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...

Your wish will be granted.

Giving Up On A Dream Doesn't Hurt As Much When You Do It For Someone You Love...Unknown

One Must Dare To Be Himself, However Frightening Or Strange That Self May Prove To Be...Unknown

It's Not Paranoia If They Really Are Out To Get You...Henry Kissinger

You Can't Steal Second Base and Keep One Foot On First...Unknown

Silence is Golden, but Duct Tape is Silver...Unknown

Those Who Laugh Last, Think Slowest...Unknown

You Know, Nasty Little Fellows Such As Yourself Always Get Their Comeuppance...Evelyn...The Mummy

Patience is a Virtue...Not Right Now It isn't...Evelyn, Rick...The Mummy

To Be Prepared For War is One of The Most Effectual Means of Preserving Peace...President George Washington

I Believe There Are More Instances of the Abridgement of the Freedom of the People by Gradual and Silent Encroachments of Those in Power Than by Violent and Sudden Usurpations...President James Madison

It is Easier To Do a Job Right Than To Explain Why You Didn't...President Martin Van Buren

An Honorable Defeat is Better Than a Dishonorable Victory...President Millard Fillmore

A Man is Known By the Company He Keeps, And Also By the Company From Which He is Kept Out...President Stephen Grover Cleveland

Above All, Tell the Truth...President Stephen Grover Cleveland

That's All a Man Can Hope For During His Lifetime - To Set an Example - And When He is Dead, To Be an Inspiration For History...President William McKinley

In the Time of Darkest Defeat, Victory May Be Nearest...President William McKinley

Speak Softly and Carry a Big Stick...President Theodore Roosevelt

Some People Call Me an Idealist. Well, That is the Way I Know I Am an American. America is the Only Idealistic Nation In the World...President Thomas Woodrow Wilson

We Grow Great By Dreams. All Big Men are Dreamers...President Thomas Woodrow Wilson

The Only Thing We Have To Fear is Fear Itself...President Franklin Delano Roosevelt

Happiness Lies In the Joy of Achievement And the Thrill of Creative Effort...President Franklin Delano Roosevelt

A Pessimist is One Who Makes Difficulties of His Opportunities And an Optimist is One Who Makes Opportunities of His Difficulties...President Harry S. Truman

I Never Saw a Pessimistic General Win a Battle...President Dwight D. Eisenhower

Always Give Your Best, Never Get Discouraged, Never Be Petty; Always Remember, Others May Hate You. Those Who Hate You Don't Win Unless You Hate Them. And Then You Destroy Yourself...President Richard Nixon

We Must Adjust To Changing Times And Still Hold To Unchanging Principles...President James Carter Jr.

If You Don't Feel Something Strongly You're Not Going To Achieve...President George W. Bush

A Woman is Like a Teabag - You Never Know How Strong She is Until She Gets In Hot Water...Eleanor Roosevelt

Do What You Feel In Your Heart To Be Right - For You'll Be Criticized Anyway. You'll Be Damned if You Do, And Damned if You Don't...Eleanor Roosevelt

Great Minds Discuss Ideas; Average Minds Discuss Events; Small Minds Discuss People...Eleanor Roosevelt

Learn From the Mistakes of Others. You Can't Live Long Enough To Make Them All Yourself...Eleanor Roosevelt

No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Consent...Eleanor Roosevelt

Never Bend Your Head. Hold It High. Look the World Straight In the Eye...Helen Keller

One Can Never Consent To Creep When One Feels an Impulse To Soar...Helen Keller

The Best And Most Beautiful Things In the World Cannot Be Seen or Even Touched. They Must Be Felt Within the Heart...Helen Keller

I Am Not Afraid of Storms, For I Am Learning How To Sail My Ship...Louisa May Alcott

Courage is Being Scared To Death But Saddling Up Anyway...John Wayne

Life is Hard; It's Harder If You're Stupid...John Wayne

A Man Ought To Do What He Thinks is Right...John Wayne

If Everything isn't Black And White, I Say, "Why the Hell Not?"...John Wayne

A Learned Blockhead is a Greater Blockhead Than an Ignorant One...Benjamin Franklin

Education Without Values, as Useful as It is, Seems Rather To Make a Man a More Clever Devil...C.S. Lewis

Experience: That Most Brutal of Teachers. But You Learn, My God Do You Learn...C.S. Lewis

It is the Job That is Never Started That Takes Longest To Finish...J.R.R. Tolkien

The Wise Speak Only of What They Know...J.R.R. Tolkien

You Can Only Come To the Morning Through the Shadows...J.R.R. Tolkien

I Don't Know Half of You Half as Well as I Should Like; And I Like Less Than Half of You Half as Well as You Deserve...J.R.R. Tolkien

Courage is Found in Unlikely Places...J.R.R. Tolkien

Fair Speech May Hide a Foul Heart...J.R.R. Tolkien

Many That Live Deserve Death. And Some That Die Deserve Life. Can You Give It To Them? Then Do Not Be Too Eager To Deal Out Death In Judgement. For Even the Very Wise Cannot See All Ends...J.R.R. Tolkien

Faithless is He That Says Farewell When the Road Darkens...J.R.R. Tolkien

All We Have To Decide is What To Do With the Time That is Given To Us...J.R.R. Tolkien

It Takes a Great Deal of Courage To Stand Up To Your Enemies, But Even More To Stand Up To Your Friends...J.K. Rowling

It is Our Choices That Show What We Truly Are, Far More Than Our Abilities...J.K. Rowling

The Best of Us Must Sometimes Eat Our Words...J.K. Rowling

It Matters Not What Someone is Born, But What They Grow To Be...J.K. Rowling

What's Comin' Will Come And We'll Meet It When It Does...J.K. Rowling

You Sort of Start Thinking Anything's Possible If You've Got Enough Nerve...J.K. Rowling

Fear of a Name Only Increases Fear of the Thing Itself...J.K. Rowling

It Does Not Do To Dwell on Dreams And Forget To Live...J.K. Rowling


1. Harry's get together lesson
this is well you have to read it, 'cause i suck at summaries and i typed it in like 20 minutes . So go ahead and read it has Harry playing an instrument in it and singing. I own none of the songs.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,135 - Published: 5-29-13 - Harry P. & Severus S. - Complete
2. Broken » reviews
Broken and desperate, Harry confronted Voldemort about his point of view of the world. Will Voldemort grant Harry his wish or will Harry have to continue facing the cruelties of the world? Summary given to me by: Seirei Nightlord05 Talks about attempted suicide,if this may trigger you please don't read it. One-Shot Second chapter is the improved version.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,219 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 1-30-13 - Published: 11-11-12 - Harry P. & Voldemort - Complete
3. Read and be enlightened
Read this and learn about some going on's and hopefully you will help spread the word.
Misc. Books - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 938 - Published: 6-20-12 - Complete
4. Val Who? » reviews
Tital suggested by AngelOfTheUndead2. And if you want more it will be one shots just let me know if you want a sequel to one and I will try to write one kk. are we clear on that good read!
Skulduggery Pleasant series - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,372 - Reviews: 14 - Updated: 6-4-12 - Published: 3-3-11 - B-R. Sanguine & Fletcher R.
5. Truth or dare insane va style » reviews
the tital says it all need improvment tell meeee! VAMPIRE ACADEMY ROCKS! vote on my poll i need inspriation and soon. and lets all give a round of applause for my new beta MissBiPolarBOTDF this will be the only one of my two storys betaed the other isfine
Vampire - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,687 - Reviews: 19 - Updated: 1-29-12 - Published: 12-15-10