Brief words that describe me:

1. Deadly Poet (according to one of my friends)

2. Psychotic

3. HIGHLY jealous/dangerous (I don't care who you are, if you take something away from me...run)

4. I'm not the forgive & forget type of girl. I'm the type to hold a grudge against someone

5. Boy crazy

6. I LOVE to laugh. so if you got some jokes, here's one person who would enjoy laughing at them

7. Cat lover

8. Insect hater (I HATE BUGS)

9. Social & family outcast (this is very true. i dont quite fit in with my so called family)

10. Hmmm...smarticles!! X3

11. I gots a bit of a sailor's mouth!

NEW! 12. Possibly Bipolar...

Favorite quotes I see on Google or other random places:

1. The bad guys lie to get in your pants & the good guys lie to get in your heart...

2.The weirdest thing happened the other morning... I woke up with tears in my eyes & one rolling down my cheek...& I knew I must have dreaming of you again.

3. I stopped fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now.

4. If Barbie isn't a slut, then why do people have to buy her boyfriends?

5.I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

6. I don't repeat gossip, so listen carefully.

7. Do you have a bandaid? Cause I just scraped my knee falling for you.

8. Stand back! I'm going to try science.

9. Do you believe in love at first sight??? Or should I walk by again?!?!?!

10. Adults are just kids with money.

11. A boss is like a diaper...always on your ass & usually FULL of ...

12. Cute but psycho. Things even out.

13. The police are looking for a suspect described as sexy, funny, & great in bed. Your ugly ass is safe but where should I hide?

14. I don't have a drinking problem...I'm just really thirsty.

15. Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years.

16. The world is going to hell, & I'm driving the bus.

17. I solemnly swear I am up to no good.

18. I'm the kind of girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence at something that happened yesterday.

19. When you're down & out, drag somebody else along with you.

20. 24 hours in a day. 24 beers in a case. Coincedence?

21. Boyfriends are like sticky tape-once you get one you can't seem to shake them off.

22. Operator! Give me the number for 9-1-1!

23. yes...I have a dirty mind...& you're on it.

24. You think I'm screwed up?! You should meet the rest of my family!

25. I need someone really bad...are you really bad?

26. Today I'm wearing the smile that you left me yesterday.

27. Seduce my mind & you can have my body. Find my soul & I'm yours forever.

28. Please God, if you can't make me thin, make my friends fat.

29. Gun control is being able to hit your target!

30. There are a lot of people who call you by your name. But there is only ONE person who can make it sound so damn SPECIAL.

31. I don't wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone.

32. You asked me what was wrong & I smiled & said nothing. Then I turned around & whispered everything.

33. WWJD. Who wants jelly donuts?

34. I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

35. People say you can't live without love...I think oxygen is more important.

36. Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.

37. DO NOT INTERRUPT ME when I am talking to myself.

38. Trust is like a piece of paper. Once it's crumpled it can't be PERFECT.

39. When nothing goes right...go left.

40. Giving up doesn't always mean you're weak. Sometimes it means that you're strong enough to let go.

41. Friends help you with your addiction to crack. BEST friends are the ones that sold it to you.

42. Kiss my neck, bite me, pull my hair, trace my spine, hold me down, use your tongue, make me moan, don't stop til I'm shaking. (hehehehe)

43. Oh why'd you have to be so cute? It's impossible to ignore you.

44. Life is a song, love is the lyrics.

45. If you love something let it go, if it comes back it's yours, if it doesn't, it never was.

46. I was born intelligent but education ruined me.

47. NO TRESPASSING! Violators will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.

48. If it ain't broken, fix it til it is!

49. Facebook is like jail. You sit around, waste time, have a profile picture, write on walls, & get poked by guys you don't really know.

50. We live in an age where pizza gets to your home before the police.

51. Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.

52. The best things in life are free. Like slow, warm, tasty, passionate kisses!

53. I'm a very simple girl. All I really want is EVERYTHING.

54. Places to go. People to annoy.

55. When God made me, He was just showing off.

56. Virginity like bubble, one prick-all gone.

57. Bite me, spank me, scratch me, & kiss me too. (hehehehehe)

58. I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.

59. I lost my teddy, will you sleep with me? (we all know what happens there)

60. I had a party last night. Sorry you couldn't come...but your boyfriend did.

61. Girls look at me up & down & don't have nothing to say...funny how the words come when I walk away.

62. A woman once said that a man is like a deck of playing cards...you need: a heart to love him, a diamond to marry him, a club to smash his fucking head in, & a spade to bury the bastard.

63. boy: she's hot.

girl: she's a bitch.

girl: he's hot

boy: he's gay

64. I called your boyfriend gay so he slapped me with his purse.

65. Best friends are sisters Destiny forgot to give you.

66. Good friends don't let you do stupid things...alone.

67. I'm lost. Please take me home with you?

68. LOVE: a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise, and lips to pucker.

69. I tried smelling coke once but the ice cubes kept getting stuck in my nose!

70. you promised that you'd never leave. where are you now?

71. I'm not Barbie! that bitch has everything.

72. Fate controls who walks into your life, but you decide who you let walk out, who you let stay, & who you refuse to let go.

73. ok i admit it...I think of you every second of everyday. you are my favorite subject to talk about. when you hug me, I never want to let go. almost all of my dreams have you in them, and I get so excited when I see you. and I'm completely in love with you.

74. If you dislike the police...the next time you're in trouble call a hippie!

75. I love you with all my butt, I would say heart but my butt is bigger.

76. there should be a relationship status that says,"I don't even know whats going on."

77...and then Buffy staked Edward. THE END

78. I dream of a better world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned

79. I'm not evil. I'm good...with a twist

80. team guy who almost hit Bella with a car!

81. I taught your boyfriend that thing you like ;)

82. 3 a.m. phone call..."hey you asleep??"..."no I'm skydiving."

83. "did you fall?"

"no. I attacked the floor."

"backwards?"

"I'm freaking talented!"

84. when life gives you lemons, squeeze them in people's eyes!

85. if gossip were beer, our whole school would be wasted

86. Dear movies about high school, who the heck actually hangs a picture of their crush on their locker?! Sincerely, Yeah I'm not that much of a stalker

87. i don't hate you...but lets put it this way, if i had a bucket of water...and you were on fire, i'd drink the water.

88.going to school is like fake dog poop. its amusing to some, pointless to others, but in the end its nothing more than a pile of crap!

89.I am the author of my own life. Unfortunately i'm writing in pen and can't erase my mistakes.

90. S.C.H.O.O.L = seven crappy hours of our life.

C.L.A.S.S= come late and start sleeping.

F.I.N.A.L.S= fuck i never actually learned shit

91. WARNING: i'm sarcastic. i hurt people's feelings...SUCK IT UP!

92. of course women don't work as hard as men...THEY GET IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME.

93. PMS- pass my shotgun

94. shut up voices!! or i'll poke you with a q-tip again!

95. 99% of guys are hot. the other 1% go to my school

96. me: hey dad can you bring some lunch for me today?

hello?

are you ignoring me?

i'm pregnant.

dad: what the hell?!?!?!?!

me: just kidding, i just wanted to get your attention. bring me food!!

97. me: hey dad can i have money for some coke?

dad: uh sure...is $60 enough??

me: dad its only $1.35

dad: wow the price sure went down from when i was your age...

me: dad, coca-cola?!?!

dad: oh...thats what you mean

98. Bf: hey baby, wanna come over tonight?

Gf: sure babes! wat do u wanna do?

Bf: :P hint: it involves pillows & blankets ;)

Gf: OMG!!!! WE'RE GONNA BUILD A FORT?!!!!!???? :D

Bf: ...*face palm*...

99. If Barbie's so popular, why do we have to buy her friends?

100. Smart, good looking, and Mexican. It just doesn't get any better than this!

101. It's hard to find a friend that's...96% funky, 98% sexy, 100% sweet. So don't lose me!

102. wife: are you coming to bed?

husband: i can't this is important

wife: what?

husband: someone is wrong on the internet!!

103. A man asked a fairy to make him desirable & irresistable to all women...she turned him into a credit card :)

104. Your face, my ass, what's the difference?

105. the people who know the least about you always have the most to say

106. Boys think of girls just like books; if the cover doesn't catch their eyes, they won't even bother to read what's inside

107. Someone told me that it's illegal to kill someone because they piss you off...crap...

108. If everyone agreed with me, they'd all be right.

109. Falling in love is like jumping off a really tall building. Your brain tells you it's not a good idea, but your heart tells you, you can fly.

110. After twelve years of therapy, my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo Ingles."

111. Curiosity killed your virginity

112. When boys get jealous, it's kinda cute. When girls get jealous, World War lll is about to start.

113. A friend told me I was delusional. I almost fell off my unicorn!

114. That awkward moment when you have a better chance at finding Waldo than a boyfriend. (am I the only one who agrees with this quote?)

115. Arguing with a woman is like getting arrested. Everything you say can and will be used against you.

116. My level of immaturity changes depending on who I am with.

117. That moment when your teacher says 'Pick a partner' And you give your best friend the sexiest pedophile look ever.

118. During a two hour movie with a forty second sex scene, guess which part your parents walk in?

119. I hate how after an argument I think of really clever stuff to say.

120. Stalking my crush is such a strong accusation. I prefer 'intense research on an individual'.

121. When I die, I'm going to become a ghost and watch attractive people shower.

122. I'm a leader not a follower, unless it's a dark alley. Then you're going first.

123. I've always wanted to go into an elevator full of strangers and say, "I bet you're wondering why I've gathered you all here today."

124. Rule of algebra: If it seems easy, you're probably doing it wrong.

125. I'm in love with my bed. We're perfect for each other, but my alarm clock doesn't want us together. That jealous whore.

126. That awkward moment when you walk out of your bedroom in your pajamas and there's a guest in your house.

127. Most teenagers take drugs, alcohol, and have sex. Honestly, all I really want is a fast internet connection.

128. A man came to my door and asked if I could donate to the local school's swimming pool. I came back with a glass of water. Is that so wrong?

129. Being a virgin these days is something to be proud of, because it's so rare. You're like a freaking unicorn!

130. Whenever a piece of food falls on the floor...Little Germs: Let's get it!

King Germ: NO! We must wait five seconds...

131. Sitting in the class wondering who would die if one of the fans fell

132. 3 words, 8 letters that give you instant popularity, "I HAVE GUM"

133. Checking behind the shower curtain before you pee to make sure there are no serial killers

132. I hate thinking I found a parking spot, and it turns out to be a small car.

133. If stress burned calories, I'd be a super model.

134. Only in math problems, it is completely normal to go to the store and buy 90 watermelons

135. The biggest lie online: 'I have read and agreed to the terms of this use'

136. I don't need to flirt. I will seduce with my awkwardness!

137. If you see a plate of bacon running down the street screaming 'HELP ME', please return it. It's totally overreacting.

138. I may look calm, but in my head I've killed you 3 times

139. A jealous woman does better research than the FBI

140.What is sexy? Sexy is standing in the rain as you push me up against the hood of your car, tearing my shirt, as you kiss me with the intent to never stop

141. I'm not saying I hate you. I'm just saying that if you get hit by a bus, I'd be driving that bus.

142. Dear sleep, I know we had problems when I was younger; but I love you now.

143. In 1,000 years, archeologists will find tanning beds and think that we fried people as punishment.

144. Since sex got easier to get, love got harder to find.

145. We are best friends. Always remember that when you fall, I'll be there to pick you up...after I finish laughing.

146. My bed is so much more comfortable when I'm not supposed to be in it.

147. I don't have a short temper...I just have a quick reaction to bullshit.

148. I don't have a dirty mind...I just have a sexy imagination

149. Sluts fuck; good girls make love (I CAME UP WITH THIS ONE!!!!)

150. When I get old, I'm not going to knit. I'm gonna keep pressing my life alert button to see how many hot firemen I can get to show up.

151. Wouldn't it be the perfect crime if you stole my heart and you stole mine?

152. Every time I look at the keyboard, I see that U and I are always together.

153. I love you pillow, you understand me

154. You look at a teacher's hand, you see a ring and you think "Who would marry YOU?"

What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:

When she walks away from you mad Follow her

When she stares at your mouth Kiss her

When she pushes you or hits you Grab her and don't let go

When she starts cussing at you Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet Ask her whats wrong

When she ignores you Give her your attention

When she pulls away Pull her back

When you see her at her worst Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying Just hold her and don't say a word

When you see her walking Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared Protect her

When she lays her head on your shoulder Tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steals your favorite hat Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn't answer for a long time Reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt Back yourself up

When she says that she likes you she really does more than you could understand

When she grabs at your hands Hold hers and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes don't look away until she does

When she misses you she's hurting inside

When you break her heart the pain never really goes away

When she says its over she still wants you to be hers

When she repost this bulletin she wants you to read it -

Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.-

When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you-

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-

Treat her like she's all that matters to you.-

Tease her and let her tease you back.-

Stay up all night with her when she's sick.-

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.-

Give her the world.-

Let her wear your clothes.-

When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.-

Let her know she's important.-

Kiss her in the pouring rain.-

When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's ass am I kicking?"

If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :

Call you.

Kiss you.

Love you.

Text you.