A self-proclaimed and critically acclaimed insensitive bastard—but hey, I yam what I yam—currently struggling to write anything more than one chapter long. Unfortunately, life would beg to differ.

Apologies if I don't answer your emails. Most of what is sent to me gets diverted to my junk mail box, so if you really want my attention, put something in the subject heading that won't blend in with all the spam telling me to get a bigger debt and consolidate my penis (or is it the other way around?). Something regarding fanfiction or FF.net is a good idea, or you can reach me on my AIM screenname, ShadowCell2. Otherwise, see my favorites list for some recommended reads.

My past fanfiction works, no longer on this website, that people may ask about:

Forgive Me (Yu-Gi-Oh!): An incredibly angsty fanfic I wrote during my depressive 13-year-old "cocoon of self-pity" phase. It's basically about Seto Kaiba hating himself and committing suicide. FF.net removed it because, according to them, it wasn't a story. Whatever. That's where it went. It's better off dead. Y'know. LIKE KAIBA'S SOUL.

The Imperial Matchmaker (Star Wars): It was basically about Grand Admiral Thrawn, Ysanne Isard, and Captain Pellaeon retiring from the Empire and getting an apartment on Coruscant. Pellaeon ends up having to try to fix the critically-damaged relationship between Thrawn and Isard, for the sake of his own sanity if nothing else. Taken down because the idea well went dry and the muse went on strike.

There is No Happy Ending / Ever After (Star Fox): A Star Fox fic I tried to write during my Gundam fic under the name "There is No Happy Ending," but it went to hell when my idea well went completely dry, so I took it down. I then tried to rejuvenate it a while later as "Ever After," but that didn't go too well either. In retrospect, they're better off dead, and so dead they shall stay.

Slave (Jackie Chan Adventures): Romance? Action? Both? It was everything and it was nothing. It's gone. In retrospect, I think it sucks, so I didn't want it here attributed to my name, and I'm pretty sure everyone who did want to read it has read it by now anyways. If you really want to read it, you can ask me, I guess (and provide some form of tribute--sexy redheaded and/or brunette lovers are always a surefire way to get on my good side), but be forewarned that it was written by a version of myself that was quite younger than the current version, and I don't find it to be an accurate reflection of my current writing skills.

Fun on Vjun (Star Wars: Jedi Academy): A short little fanfic about what's going through the minds of those video game characters that we, the players, control--and how our figuring out that hey, those spinning fan blades hurt usually comes at the dire expense of the character on whom those spinning fan blades are inflicting catastrophic damage. Taken down, because Jedi Academy decided it didn't want to let me play it anymore, and it's kind of hard to write a snarky fanfic about a video game when you can't play the video game.

Underwater (Mobile Suit Gundam SEED): Romance? Eh, not really. More like lust and detail. Taken down because I wasn't all too thrilled with it in retrospect--and certain events in Gundam SEED DESTINY rendered it oblong and obsolete.

The Eternal Mistake (New Mobile Report Gundam Wing): What started as a mysterious trip to the remote colonies of Jupiter undertaken by one Mr. Zechs Marquise turned into a massive and bloated crossover of just about everything in the Gundam metaverse, and it just kept going for a while on its own momentum, until it finally ran aground on the cold hard truth of "hey, you don't know where you're going, do you?" It's gone, and I discovered the virtue of planning what the hell your story is going to be about before you start writing it.

Allenby's Dating Adventures (Mobile Fighter G Gundam): A lonely Allenby Beardsley is subjected to the classified ads of the Neo Japanese newspapers, and all the creepy weirdos that come with them. Taken down, because shockingly enough, I ran out of suitable creepy weirdos. However, my mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives, so it might someday make a comeback in a new and improved form. Maybe. And if you can get the reference I just made there, then you just might be awesome.

Lest you get the wrong idea from this litany of failed fanfiction, I don't completely suck at this! Well. I think.

And, believe it or not, I still do this "fanfiction" thing from time to time. So, some future works:

Mobile Suit Gundam SEED TWILIGHT / Mobile Suit Gundam SEED ETERNITY (Mobile Suit Gundam SEED / Mobile Suit Gundam SEED DESTINY): Sequel to the above-mentioned new version of DESTINY, all I'll reveal thus far is that it features a new main character and a deeper look at the world of the Cosmic Era, now that I've totally screwed it up. No idea when it will show up, though it definitely won't be until I'm done posting the rewritten DESTINY.