duchessofdisaster
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since: 05-10-11, id: 2910371, Profile Updated: 10-23-12
country: Australia
Author has written 44 stories for Vampire Diaries, Supernatural, True Blood, Revenge, and Captain America.

Why, hello there.

When I'm not the Duchess, I am pleasebekidding (AO3, Twitter and livejournal). Also please-be-kidding on tumblr.

(Toes the dust with my crappy sneakers).

Do you like stuff? Yeah? Me too.

24 October 2012 I haven't been as active for a couple of reasons; one is a pile of unfinished stories that just mock and mock me, the other is that I am trying to withdraw from fandom somewhat and focus on my original work. Ill be publishing a couple of stories this weekend and then disappearing for NaNoWriMo. Wish me luck!

However I have not given up on my beautiful boys. I will be continuing with 'The next hundred years or so - horribly blocked on a chapter right now and I will stop doing a story for every year, soon, since I never intended it to be 100 chapters long (oh god, that would kill me).

If you need posy 4.02 hugs - here, let me give them to you.

28/5 Rumours abound... FFN may be in the process of another cull of ex pl ic it content. If your favourite story vanishes (I have 36 stories here right now - less than that and there's stuff missing) you will always be able to find me at Archive of our own (google it if you don't know it - can't put urls here), where my name is pleasebekidding. Or find my livejournal where all my fics (including drabbles not here) are indexed. Same username. x


1. Here, have some Alaric Saltzman - Steve Rogers crackship fic reviews
Having interrogated Alaric gently about his nine deaths and subsequent resurrection, Phil Coulson offers Alaric Saltzman the chance to get away from Mystic Falls and vampires forever, as the history and politics tutor to a recently defrosted Steve Rogers.
Crossover - Vampire Diaries & Captain America - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,613 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5-16-13 - Alaric S. & Steve R./Capt. America
2. We did it when we were young reviews
All human AU. Alaric has been dragged to Mystic Falls for senior year. He meets Damon Salvatore and the rest is history. (Trigger warning for abuse against Damon by his father - non graphic, only the results are described.)
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,596 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 5-16-13 - Damon S. & Alaric S. - Complete
3. Veil Alaric reviews
Episode tag for 4.22. With a few hours to kill before Alaric disappears again he and Damon head to the loft to recreate their best moments.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,855 - Reviews: 14 - Published: 5-16-13 - Damon S. & Alaric S. - Complete
4. Memory rests reviews
Alaric has been dead for four years, so Damon is somewhat surprised to find him tending bar, with no idea of who he is or where he came from. They collide like galaxies.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 18,073 - Reviews: 17 - Published: 1-12-13 - Alaric S. & Damon S.
5. The place we need to have reviews
New Year's Eve, not that there's much to celebrate. Stupid sire bond. And grief hanging around the boarding house like a thick, ugly fog, choking everyone. After listening to Damon talk to Alaric's grave, Elena decides she'd not ready to give up on him, not yet.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,677 - Reviews: 21 - Published: 1-3-13 - Elena G. & Damon S.
6. Auld Lang Syne my ass reviews
Damon/Elena/Stefan OT3. Slashy so published under Defan. Very naughty. Choosing is boring. Damon's never been a fan. He's entirely keen to make sure Elena knows she doesn't have to choose either.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,984 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 1-2-13 - Damon S. & Stefan S. - Complete
7. Have yourself a merry little Christmas reviews
Damon/Alaric/Elena. Listed in the Dalaric tag because your average Delena fan doesn't tend to like slash too much. Elena and Damon are living where Elena goes to college. When they come home for Christmas, Alaric seems sad, and lonely, and Elena decides she and Damon should spend Christmas Eve with him. Smut ensues.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,105 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 1-1-13 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
8. I will follow you into the dark reviews
It's in May that the last of Castiel's Grace shatters. In the next few weeks Castiel learns a lot. In November, Castiel goes home, and it is Alaric who leads him there.
Crossover - Supernatural & Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,298 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 12-1-12 - Castiel & Alaric S.
9. Alaric Saltzman and the Vampiric Potions Partner reviews
When Damon Salvatore came back to Hogwarts in seventh year, there was something different about him... This is not a crossover so much as it is a High School AU with my favorite boys attending Hogwarts. Slash, Dalaric, don't even ask me what I was thinking. Really, don't.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 24,464 - Reviews: 16 - Published: 10-20-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S.
10. The next hundred years or so » reviews
The next 100 years of life for Alaric and Damon after Alaric goes vamp. AU from the middle of S3. A series of one-shots which will reveal multiple character arcs over time. Dalaric slash with other pairings along the way. Multiple genres. Subscribe!
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 16 - Words: 121,290 - Reviews: 159 - Updated: 8-5-12 - Published: 5-1-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S.
11. Head is a jungle, heart is an empty room » reviews
This is the story of Isobel Flemming's life from the age of thirteen, visiting Mystic Falls during her summer holidays, through to the moment she died burning in the Grove Hills cemetery. Various pairings Isobel with John, Alaric, Damon . Warnings on individual chapters.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Drama/Supernatural - Chapters: 8 - Words: 68,636 - Reviews: 24 - Published: 7-14-12 - Isobel F. & Alaric S. - Complete
12. Circles around me reviews
So Elena's a vampire. That's great. Damon is sure she and Stefan will be very happy together. Totally awesome. Since Damon's last, best shot at happiness just died in his arms.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,395 - Reviews: 25 - Published: 5-30-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
13. It's the dog that does it reviews
When Sammy dies, and Emily cries into Jack's shoulder, she realizes she can't do it any more. Jack/Emily/Nolan, polyamory, slash. Spoilers for 1.21-22.
Revenge - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,409 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 5-26-12 - Nolan R. & Jack P. - Complete
14. Home reviews
Alaric is five years dead, at Damon and Bonnie's hands, when he shows up outside the crypt. Alt reality for all Dalaric shippers instead of 3.22. Slash duh , Damon being a changed man because he's been heartbroken five years, Elijah being awesome.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 24,333 - Reviews: 21 - Published: 5-12-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
15. North of the snow line reviews
After Evilaric makes an attempt on Elijah's life, after ep 3.18, Elijah takes him away for some research and rehab. Despite Elijah's olde-worlde sensibilities, things get heated. Slash.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 15,291 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 5-2-12 - Alaric S. & Elijah - Complete
16. Be still reviews
Missing scene from 3.20. There's not a lot of time to say the things that need to be said, but Damon will try.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,195 - Reviews: 11 - Published: 4-27-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
17. The thunderstorm reviews
Jeremy and Tyler have been dancing around this for years. Jeremy's sick of pretending. Consensual underage slash, first time, adorableness.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,251 - Reviews: 16 - Published: 4-10-12 - Jeremy G. & Tyler L. - Complete
18. House arrest, lite reviews
"Let's just say you've got an alter-ego hell bent on killing council members. So we're gonna pack up some of your stuff, go to the loft, just for a little bit. You know. It's like house arrest. Lite." mild slash, episode tag. Spoilers for 3.17.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,236 - Reviews: 21 - Published: 3-24-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
19. Indian head penny reviews
Sometimes Alaric wakes with a penny in his pocket and no vampires in his life; sometimes he wakes on the right side of the world. Slash, AU.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,420 - Reviews: 19 - Published: 3-24-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
20. Lapis and bourbon, amen » reviews
Alaric's got something on his mind, but he's not talking. There are clues, though. Slash.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 17,391 - Reviews: 34 - Published: 3-10-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
21. If I just lay here » reviews
Having been killed by Damon one time too many, Alaric hits the road. Looking for somewhere he can settle without having to think about vampires any more. Unfortunately for Ric, his car breaks down just outside of Bon Temps. Slash.
Crossover - True Blood & Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 4 - Words: 14,462 - Reviews: 11 - Published: 3-10-12 - Sam M. & Alaric S. - Complete
22. Lessons reviews
Elena keeps telling herself she has no choice; she is weak and human, and Katherine is strong. So why is she wearing that lingerie? femslash, dub-con, humiliation.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,068 - Reviews: 18 - Published: 3-10-12 - Elena G. & Katherine - Complete
23. Nine lives reviews
Alaric's ring has a shelf life: nine lives. How many times has it been used? Slash.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,955 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 3-10-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
24. Almost lover reviews
Every day Alaric thinks about leaving Mystic Falls for good, and every night he opens the door to Damon. For now, it's enough. A very strange AU in which Damon and Alaric are not the blissfully happy couple we know them to be.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,173 - Reviews: 14 - Published: 2-18-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
25. I will be the one to gaze on you discreetly reviews
Damon and Alaric can't keep their eyes off Elijah, and he can't keep his eyes off them. Threesome slash. Smutty as all getout.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,908 - Reviews: 19 - Published: 2-9-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
26. Bloody Handprints reviews
Alaric died. Again. Damon wasn't there. And Alaric's washing his own blood off the walls and floor of the Gilbert house.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,849 - Reviews: 16 - Published: 2-3-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
27. The claim reviews
They've been having messy, enthusiastic sex for a few months now, but Damon's never bitten Alaric.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,705 - Reviews: 25 - Published: 2-2-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
28. I die a little death on each St Valentine's reviews
Alaric may be the worst guardian ever but when he hears Elena crying in her bedroom, he vows to do his best. Smut ensues. don't blame Alaric. Blame ME
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,698 - Reviews: 21 - Published: 2-1-12 - Alaric S. & Elena G. - Complete
29. Five more minutes reviews
A significant problem with relying on a human to satisfy your sexual needs on an ongoing basis is that they need to sleep, for hours at a time, when there are orgasms to be had.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,985 - Reviews: 15 - Published: 1-24-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
30. It's okay reviews
Drabble. Mystic Falls is crawling with hybrids, and Alaric and Damon top the hit list.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 683 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 1-23-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
31. In the interests of full disclosure reviews
Alaric and Damon have to come clean to Elena, before she gets any more attached. Present for SummerFairy.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,458 - Reviews: 27 - Published: 1-19-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
32. To Sir with love, undead edition reviews
Alaric has work to do. Damon has Alaric to do. PWP oneshot for Saltzatore.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,149 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 1-17-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
33. No one together » reviews
Once upon a time, Alaric Saltzman was impractical, and prone to making bad decisions. And then a vampire killed his wife. John Winchester was a legendary vampire hunter, and Alaric was desperate to learn. Dalaric in the end.
Crossover - Supernatural & Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 12 - Words: 40,845 - Reviews: 37 - Published: 1-15-12 - John W. & Alaric S. - Complete
34. Dr Damon saves the day reviews
We saw the wrong kiss in the episode, so I wrote the right one. Spoilers for 3.10!
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 594 - Reviews: 12 - Published: 1-6-12 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
35. Something we need to talk about reviews
Damon wants Alaric to become a vampire and he's prepared to do pretty much anything to convince him. Smutty oneshot.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,091 - Reviews: 14 - Published: 12-31-11 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
36. All the miles that separate reviews
Damon and Alaric will do anything for the ones they care about - even if they really don't want to.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,695 - Reviews: 15 - Published: 12-29-11 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
37. The Edge of the Deep Green Sea » reviews
Damon Salvatore had spent the better part of the last two years trying to convince Alaric Saltzman to let him turn him into a vampire. He'd been holding out, being a good boyfriend and now it was all going to hell.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 7 - Words: 17,485 - Reviews: 32 - Published: 12-20-11 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
38. Sundae Session reviews
Food fight? That's how Damon apologises? Takes place after 3x07, Ghost World.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,961 - Reviews: 20 - Published: 12-1-11 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
39. Standing Invitation » reviews
Stefan's dead, Klaus is dead, and everyone runs from Mystic Falls except Elena and Alaric. They just want Damon to come back.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,130 - Reviews: 37 - Published: 11-24-11 - Alaric S. & Elena G. - Complete
40. Thanksgiving reviews
Elena feels she doesn't have much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving, so Damon tries to give her a reason.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,988 - Reviews: 16 - Published: 11-17-11 - Elena G. & Damon S. - Complete
41. Cherryflavoured lip gloss reviews
Rebekah just likes to have fun.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,080 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 11-14-11 - Elena G. & Rebekah - Complete
42. The seventeenth day reviews
Alaric shows up with newspapers, ideas, and no idea how to just ask.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,514 - Reviews: 25 - Published: 11-13-11 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete
43. Two things that should have happened reviews
"That's the way to a vampire's heart." What would have happened if Elena had just leaned into Damon?
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,064 - Reviews: 12 - Published: 11-11-11 - Damon S. & Elena G. - Complete
44. Things he doesn't have to do reviews
Sometimes Damon does things he doesn't have to do. Sometimes he apologises afterwards.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,166 - Reviews: 16 - Published: 11-11-11 - Alaric S. & Damon S. - Complete