Author has written 6 stories for Morganville Vampires, and Mortal Instruments.
Hey the names Hannah people!!
Im 16 years old and apparently im weird?
whats that? you'd like to know a bit about me? well ok then.
Im really irritated at some of the casting for the City of Bones movie. I mean I get that a lot of people like it but I don't. I don't like who they have for Alec, Jace and Magnus (Godfrey Gao is so not my choice for Magnus, just sayin'). Don't get me wrong they're great actors but they are wrong for the parts!! Sorry, rant over. Please continue reading :D
My hopes and dreams are for me to be able to move to New York and my second language is Albanain and my third is French. My dads side of the family are from Kosovo (and yes that is a real country).
im very bad at updating mainly due to the fact that im sitting 5 highers this year!(very important people! so if youre in the same boat as me, get yo ass studyin'!) and the fact that I have no willpower WHATSOEVER!!! im better at posting oneshots because there is no pressure to update. i also live in a fantasy world but Shhhh! its a secret, people might think im weird! (hehe woops to late!)
i have a little brother named Adem (and yes its an E not an A, cos its an albanian name. sigh, i wish i had an Albanian name, i think they are soo cool x)
I totally love Adam Lambert!! like really love him!! to the point of obsession :) isn't that right Kayleigh?
well thats bout it people x im not all that interesting but hey, what can ya do? we all cant have the glamours life we all hope and dream for. And the most important thing about me you should know? im in love with my Favourite book charecter Roarke.(Sigh) My Aingeal (My Angel)
(Gaelic)Feisigh do thoin fein( yeah you dont get to know what this means) but for those of you whose speak gaelic you probaby know what it means. A favourite book charecter of mine said it (Roarke obviously) and when i found out what it meant i laughed so hard i fell of my bed.
My beta is hearts a heavy burden x, she rocks and is absolutly brilliant!
oh! and im not always a dork...sometimes i sleep.
Funny stuff that makes me laugh:
"Some days the supply of available curse words is insufficient to meet my demands"
Please Note: CHRISTMAS IS CANCELLED... apparently you told Santa that you have been good this year...he died laughing.
When someone touches my phone I automatically turn into a NINJA!!
An English professor wrote the words: "A woman without her man is nothing" on the chalkboard and asked his students to punctuate it correctly. All the males in the class wrote: "A woman, without her man, is nothing". All the females in the class wrote: "A woman: with out her, man Is nothing" PUNCTUATION IS POWERFUL!
Dear Karma, I have a list of people you missed.
"Do you ever get the feeling you're being watched? Because if its bothering you, I'll stop"
The awkward moment when you finish watching a TV series and you don't know what to do with you life any more.
My life is a constant battle between my love of food and not wanting to get fat.
SARCASM: Just one of the many services I offer.
We're friends. You laugh. I laugh. You cry. I cry. You jump off a bridge. I get on my boat and save your retarded ass.
Don't grow up! its a trap.
I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.
Why do Banks keep their pens on a chain? I trust them with my money, I think they can trust me with their pen.
I love how in scary movies the person yells out "Hello?" as if the killer is going to be like "Yeah im in the kitchen, want a sandwich?"
When you're home alone & someone knocks on your door 10% say "Who is it?", 64% look through the peephole, 25% open the door, 1% crawl around on the ground like a ninja and look through the window very quietly to make sure it isn't a masked murderer. Repost this if you're that 1%.
You know when you walk into a room and forget why you went in there? That's God playing Sims, he just cancelled your action.
Does anyone else listen to their music and imagine an epic story to go with it with yourself as the main character? Or is that just me?
Im the kind of girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence at something that happened yesterday.
Don't just laugh! answer the pepperoni!
When I don't feel like talking, I put my headphones in and hope people get the hint.
Enjoy life, there's plenty of time to be dead.
Coffee is God. ( I don't actually like coffee but my favourite book character worships it (Eve Dallas, Roarke's wife) and when I read this it made me chuckle because I thought of her)
Im lazy and I know it.
A rabbit runs, jumps and lives for only 15 years. A turtle doesn't run and does nothing, yet lives for 300 years. Morale: exercise is hell. Sleep well!
Do NOT interrupt me when im TALKING to myself!
Life always offers you a second chance: its called Tomorrow.
You never know what you have...Until you clean your room.
Funny how I have a better conversation in my head with myself than I do with most people.
If each day is a gift, id like to know where I can return Mondays.
Girls are superhero's! Because who else could bleed for 5 days and not die?
No matter how old, or how bad ass you think you are, when a toddler hands your their ringing toy phone, you answer it.
I dream of a better world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned.
Good friends don't let you do stupid things...Alone.
He said..."I don't know why you wear a bra; you've nothing to put in it" She said..."You wear pants don't you?"
When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in peoples eyes.
Please God- if you cant make me thin...make all my friends fat!!
Hey You. Yeah you. No, not you...That other guy. You right there! Yes, you. Do you like tacos?
God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things...Right now Im so far behind I'll never die.
For all those men who say, "Why buy the whole cow when you can get the milk for free"... Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realise its not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage...
Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday to near Monday?
Im not clumsy. its just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies and the walls get in the way.
Oh, im sorry. I forgot, I only exist when you need something.
Oh, so you wanna argue? BRING IT! I got my CAPS LOCK ON!
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted then used against you.
I pretend idiots are really intellectuals being cuttingly sarcastic... the world is suddenly a better place.
The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.
I don't think I could ever stab someone. I mean, lets be honest here. I can barely get the straw through the Capri Sun.
When life hands you lemons, make Grape Juice. Then sit back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.
I find a duck's opinion of me is very much influenced by whether or not I have bread.
I stopped fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now.
Some people are only alive because it is illegal to kill.
I hate nerds that cover up their answers. Come on, lets work together bro.
In case of Emergency...Run like Hell.
Beware of the dog...The cat is not trustworthy either.
Woman: "If you were my husband, I'd poison your coffee" Man:" If you were my wife I'd drink it" Marriage: the only war where you sleep with the enemy.
Humanity is losing its geniuses. Aristotle died, Newton passed away, Einstein died and im not feeling well today.
I keep trying to kidnap Jasper but Alice is always at his window with a bat waiting for me, how does she kn-Ohh, Rightt...
Smile, it confuses people.
I was born intelligent, but education ruined me.
Out of my mind...Back in 5 minutes.
I hate when people see me at the supermarket and they are like: "hey what are you doing here?" and im just like: "Oh you know, hunting elephants"
When im bored, I text a random number saying "I hid the body...now what?"
Take revenge...Crap on a pigeon.
When food falls on the floor. Little germs: "Lets get it!" King Germs: "No! We must wait for 5 seconds!"
FACEBOOK is like jail. you sit around, waste time, have a profile picture, write on walls and get poked by guys you really don't know.
You're 90% of the reason I get up each morning. The other 10% is because I have to pee.
Every time I feel the urge to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.
I smile because I have no idea what's going on.
Common sense is not a gift, its a punishment. Because you have to deal with everyone who doesn't have it.
3 am phone call.. "Hey are you asleep??"..."No im skydiving"
If the world really ends in 2012, iv just wasted my whole life in school. Lovely.
My Favourite books are ( and im going to list them all, well what i can remember. because im that sad and have absolutley no life whatsoever) :
Any book written by Nora Roberts/J.D.Robb
The Mortal Instruments series
Under the never sky
The Infernal Devices series
The In Death Series
The Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy
The Demon Traper series
The Weather Warden series
The Unbound series
The Hunger Games
The Soul Screamer Series
The Chicagoland Vampires series (Ethan is not dead!)
The House of Night series
The Night Hunter series
The Morganville vampires series
The Mercy series
The Night World series
Die for me
The body Finder series
The Fallen series ( thats with Daniel and Luce BTW)
Raised by Wolves series
The Hollow series
The Splendour Falls
Die for Me series
Hush Hush series
The Dark Divine series
If i stay & Where she Went
And many more. sorry its late and i cant remember any more of the top of my head.
Now on to T.V shows!!!:
Rizzoli and Isles
Once Upon A Time
The Good Wife
Waking the Dead
The Body Farm
Mrs Brown's Boys
The Secret Circle ( and no i have not read the books! )
10 Commandments of a Teenager
1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia
girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love
"They hurt her..."
About six years ago in India, Carmen Winstead was pushed down a sewer opening by five girls in her school, trying to embarrass her in front of her school during a firedrill. When she didn't submerge, the police were called. They went down and brought up 17-year-old Carmen Winstead's body, with her neck broken from hitting the ladder, then the cement at the bottom. The girls told every one she fell... they believed them.
Fact: About two months later, 16-year-old David Gregory read this post and didn't repost it. when he went to take a shower he heard laughter, started freaking out, and went to his computer to repost it. He said goodnight to his mom and went to sleep, but five hours later, his mom woke up in the middle of the night from a loud noise and David was gone. A few hours later the police found him in the sewer with a broken neck and the skin on his face peeled off.
Even google her name - you'll find this to be true.
If you don't say "they hurt her," Carmen will get you, either from the sewer, the toilet, the shower, or when you go to sleep, you'll wake up in the sewer, in the dark, then Carmen will come and kill you.
Good friends knock on your door. Best friends walk into your house and yell "I'm home."
I thought they were really sad . Read them and see what you think. Warning! The poems may make you cry!
“Her hair was up in a ponytail
"I went to a party,
A STORY OF A SAD GIRL..
Her name was Abby
Her dad was a drunk
Her only friend
She always talked to it
Until her parents
A bruise on her leg
But she grabs her bear
She sits in the corner
Such a bad life
Then one night
Then her mom suddenly
She thrusted the blade
The mom walked out
Police showed up
One officer slowly
It must have been bad
Post This On Your Profile If Your Against Child Abuse
My name is Tiffany
I am three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren’t ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can’t do a wrong
I can’t speak at all
Or else im locked up
All day long.
When im awake im all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren’t home
When my mommy does come home
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe ill just get
One whipping tonight.
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie’s bar.
I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself
Against the wall
I try to hide
From his evil eyes
I’m so afraid now
I’m starting to cry
He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault
He suffers at work.
He slaps and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And run to the door
He’s already locked it
And i start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken,
"I’m sorry!", I scream
But its now much to late
His face has been twisted
Into a unimaginable shape
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
O please God, have mercy!
O please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door
While i lay there motionless
Brawled on the floor
My name is tiffany
I am three,
Tonight my daddy
And you can help, Sickens me top the soul,
And if you read this and don’t pass it on. I pray for your forgiveness. Because you would have to be. One heartless person. To not be affected. By this Poem. And because you are affected. Do something about it! So all i ask you to do.Is pass this on!
IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE
poem about suicide:
I'm Going To Draw A Picture,
A Picture With A Twist;
I'll Draw It With A Razor Blade,
I'll Draw It On My Wrist.
And As I Draw This Picture,
A Fountain Will Appear;
And As This Fountain Flows,
My Troubles Dissapear...
WHAT A KISS MEANS
Kiss on the stomach = "I'm ready"
What the gesture means...
If you LIKE, LOVE, OR MISS someone right now
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile
Check this out...
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a
rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling
was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
If you could read that put it in your profile.
just want to thank some of my bestest friends who have been completely awesome you guys know who you are but for those of you who are thick and dont realise i think youre awesome im gonna list you:
Melissa: my sarcastic and funny friend who has the same book interests as me.
Rebecca: my quiet yet understanding chemistry and biology buddy!
Trixie: the one who puts up with me on a daily basis and dosnt complain once about it!
Kayleigh: the one i bounce fanfic ideas of and my music twin!
Madison: Who makes fun of Big Wendy G! and makes me laugh.
Rosie: who is always smiling.
P.S Melissa i know a lot of those jokes on your profile are about me! i aint as thick as you seem to think i am. hurtfull so and so :P
A man buys a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie. he decides to test it at dinner. Dad: son where were you today during school hours? Son: At School( robot slaps son) okay! i went to the movies! Dad: which one? Son: Harry Potter.(robot slaps son again!) ok i was watching porn. Dad: What? when i was your age i didnt even know what porn was! (Robot slaps dad) Mom: Hahaha! After all he is your son! (Robot slaps mom)
cop on a horse says to a girl on a bike "Did santa get you that?" "Yes" replies the little girl "well tell him to put a reflector light on it next year!" says the cop and fines her £5. the little girl looks up at the cop and says "Nice horse you've got there, did santa bring you that?" the cop chuckles and replies "he sure did!" "well" says the little girl "Next year tell santa that the d*ck goes under the horse not on top of it!"
A mother askes her son to go the shop to buy a bag of cherries to bake into her cake. he goes to the shop and buys the cherrys. but on the way home he accidentally ate them, he thought to himself "oh crap iv ate all the cherries and have no money buy more" so he goes to his room and brings out his marbles and paints them red. he gives them to his mother who bakes them into a cake for dinner. later at dinner the mother asks "Who wants cake?" everyone raises their hands. later that night the dad comes out of the toilet and says "i just done a poo and cracked the pan" the daughter the says "If you think thats bad, earlier i farted and shot the dog"
There once was a dragon and this dragon had an unusul fasination with the queen's breasts. one day the dragon let slip to the doctor of his fasination. the doctor said "i will help you touch the Queen's breasts if you will pay me 2000 pounds" the dragon quikly agreed. the next day while the queen was bathing the doctor sliped itching powder into the queens bra. the queen called for the doctor and the doctor said that the only cure for the itching was dragons saliva. the queen then called for the dragon to come to her chambers and sort her problem. later the doctor asked the dragon for his payment and the dragon refused "you have already helped me therefore i do not need to help you because if you tell anyone you will get into trouble as well" the next day the doctor slipped the itching powder into the king's loincloth and so the king then called for the dragon.
what did the dragon say to the night in shinning armour? Oh no not another canned meal.
Boy: Hey babe, you wanna come over?
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Man: Is this seat empty?
Man: Your place or mine?
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Man: IfI could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost
Don’t mess with me! I have a stick! (literally)
Some people need to be given a high five... in the face...with a brick.
Wow, you actually made it to the bottom? im impressed, really I am. I rarely ever make it here myself. im sorry if I bored ya because really I was just rambling hoping to make it seem like im actually an interesting person when Im really not. oh well, if you were bored its your own fault anyway for continuing to read :D
"I didn't LOSE my marbles, exactly...I just sold 'em. On EBay!"
(Gaelic) Ta cion agam ort always, (shQip) edhe te dua shum, Hannah. ( I love you always, and love you loads Hannah)
(Gaelic)A grha ( My Love )
(Italian)Ciao X ( Bye )
P.S always remember-(Latin) Omnia causa fiunt! ( everything happens for a reason )
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