|Kiwi and a Random Penguin|
Poll: Do you often come up with ideas, but rarely stick with them? Vote Now!
Author has written 11 stories for Mario, Pokémon, Misc. Games, Death Note, Disgaea, and Legend of Zelda.
All fics are now updated spontaneously. Sorry guys, it's just that I can't get myself to finish a story most of the time once I started. Feel free to bash me for my laziness. I deserve it.
I'm Kiwi, the self-proclaimed queen of random. Sup. I'm a spazztistic author who has a penguin assistant, is extremely lazy, and likes to write cracky fics just to make people's days. Serious fic? Eh, they'll write themselves up occasionally.
Ahem, anyway, welcome to my profile. Though, it's more of something to pass the time. Feel free to look around. Though I don't recommend it. This profile is my personality all barfed onto one page.
Hey, ya know...Pairing wars are like the game Battleship. Each side is trying to destroy each other, and each pairing is a different type of ship...
The huge OTPs that would be an ass to kill, those pairings that are just...there, with a moderate amount of fans (and usually have a 'rival' pairing, and those weird pairings you rarely see...usually the one like no one supports...
So, here's a game. List your fav parings and see what kind of 'ship' they are. Do you prefer the OTPs? Or those less supported, but also logical ones...? Or crack pairings? Or are you a melting pot? (Hopefully not literally.)
Here's your ship selection.
Passenger Ship/Titanic- OTPs. Basically, one of the most widely supported ships in the fandom.
Submarine- One of those hard-to-find pairings at first, but then once you ship it you realize how big the fandom for it actually is.
Lifeboat- Extremely rare pairing. Usually crack pairings or crossover pairings.
Cargo Ship- Widely supported pairing, but not as much as the OTP. May or may not have a rival pairing. Usually in wars with other Cargo Ships in the fandom whenever they share a character.
Put this game and your list on your profile with pride if you're awesome enough. If you did, sign your name in the list next to the "X".
X-Kiwi and a Random Penguin (Creator),
Don't worry broz, I won't bite!...Unless you're made out of candy.
ATTENTION TO ALL OKAMI FANS: I have recently heard that Clover was, in fact, originally planning to create an Okami sequel. You know, actually starring Amaterasu! If you love Okami, and miss Ammy, Issun (and his pervyness), Waka not being a jerkass, Oki, and a crudload of other Okami charactes; and would love for Capcom to rejuvenate and release this unborn sequel, copy and paste this onto your profile. Or make a petition. DO SOMETHING. Oh, and add your name to this list, and SPREAD THE WORD!: Kiwi and a Random Penguin,
In case if you didn't know, I do favor some pairings over others. But that's not an excuse to flame or threaten someone just because they don't agree with YOUR pairings. Everyone has their own opinions. I mean, if all romance fics were Zelink or Mario x Peach, wouldn't that get kinda BORING? Honestly! There's nothing wrong with yaoi/yuri pairings, but you shouldn't hate on straight parings either! Seriously, fangirls/fanboys! WHAT THE FUCK?
Current Ideas (WARNING: Titles might suck.):
Disgaea 5.3: Perverts and Insane Vampires Don't Mix (Note to Self: must shorten title)
Takes place after Disgaea 5: The Start of an Old Life. Well, Valzy got pissed at Keanna, so he sends her to Evil Academy get her straightened out! But it looks like he forgot about that pervert known as Mao...and said Overlord seems to be acting even weirder than usual. Will Keanna *coughcoughandalmazcough* figure this out? Will Plot successfully avoid being chainsawed by Sapphire? Does Valzy even give a fuck about this? Why do I like asking questions I know the answers of so much?
Edible Mirror (Kirby)
Kirby returns to the Mirror World along with his three clones to find that now all of the areas except Rainbow Route is made of food! Uh oh. Uuuuuh oh.
Beginner's Luck? (Yu-gi-oh! All 3 seasons crossover)
Let's face it. Hakuma has absolutely no skill when it comes to Yu-gi-oh! duels. Sure, she has 2 Light End dragons and this other big epic light dragon of destruction, but her lack of strategy doesn't help. So, what happens when she's invited to a rather sketchy tournament that defies time?
This Isn't Supposed to Work Out (My first attempt at a romance fic, therefore, it will probably suds. Badly) (Vocaloid!)
Meiko refuses to admit her feelings. Kaito's to shy to admit he likes Meiko back. And with Miku and the twins trying to meddle, this may as well be the matchmaking attempt to be told for the ages. Tsundere!Meiko x Toeto!Kaito.
Just Another Stupid Story (Misc.)
Let's face it. There are a LOT of video game characters to this day. And unfortunately, it's getting a bit too much to handle for their companies. That's when YOU step in! Join Kiwi and the other fangirls/fanboys of Video Game Facfiction as they try to handle all video game characters today! Can YOU survive the stupidity?
"Me: Can I come in? My friend Ryan: What's the magic word? Me: Please? Ryan: *opens door* No, Abracadabra!"-Real life I got thoroughly pwned.
"Tristan (my cousin, after we ate some s'mores): We'd like s'more, please. *Me, my little sis, and Tristan laugh stupidly, while me and Tristan hive-five*"-Real life We actually got s'more! :D
"Oh shi- *get pied*-Meta Knight, Hoshi no Kaabii That scene was so close to getting deleted by 4Kids
"PO-TA-TOES. Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew!" Sam Gamgee, Lord of the Rings I found this on another profile. That is all
"*Is fighting Bowser X, with only Luigi* Me: No...I will not die...I SHALL STRIVE FOR SUCCESS! *runs out of turns* Me:...Damn. At least I didn't die." Now I am glad I equipped the Bro Socks.
"*Once more, fighting Bowser X* Me: Ugh...this isn't gonna end...I'm gonna run out of turns... *kills Bowser from counterattack* Me: Whut? Did I just...win...? *stares in awe for a sec* Me: YES! YES! I DID IT! *plays Guile's Theme in head and dances*" Victory!
"*while playing Disgaea 4, my mushroom guy is attacking those dang bouncers* CMON! GII CAN DO IT-OH HEY, UNINTENTIONAL PUN!* Why yes. All of this was yelled. But NO ONE GETS THE REFERENCE.
"Friend: You know K, I was talking to my brother about how I get shy around T, and he says that when my face turns purple, I'm actually blushing...DON'T GET THE WRONG IDEA! Me: *Gets wrong idea* Wait, so does that mean you a les- Friend: NO! IT'S NOT LIKE THAT! >:(" Trolololo.
"*Bored at Wal-mart* My little sis: Well, you're sooo ugly! *Didn't really mean it, we were just screwing around* Me: Well...*randomly looks at T-shirt* YOU'RE AN UGLY T-SHIRT! Sis: You're an uglier T-shirt! Me: You are the most ugliest T-shirt!" Do YOU know any ugly T-shirts?
"*Sees Elmo on TV* OH! I REMEMBER HIM! BA BA BABA, BA BA BABA, ELMO'S WORLD! ...Wait, I can't remember yesterday's homework, but I can remember a song I heard over five years ago?" Self-Explanitory.
"PRAAAAAAIISSSSEEEE THE SUUUUUUUUUUUUN!"-Some random raged gamer on Youtube. Apparently, this guy hates Dark Souls. I don't care. PRAISE THE SUN!
"Why yes, I love to read. Problem? Cuz I already know and am proud of being a hyperactive-nerd perfectionist." -Le me. I FLIPPING LOOOOOOVE TO READ. GO BOOKS!
I can make my crap explode!"-Ume, Mutt Camp by twilitprincess If you love crackfics, Okami, the Canine Warriors, Oki, or all of the above, then read this. YOU WILL LAUGH YOUR AZZ OFF. 'Nuff said.
"Uh...what? Oh, sorry. I was too busy not paying attention." -My typical response to people I ignore for a reason.
"Have you ever had a dreams...that...dat...you um you had, you...you would you could you do...you wit you want you...you could do so...you...you do...you could...you...you wanted...you want him to do you so much you could do anything? :D" -Kid Totally nailed it.
"Um...okay...there a dude playing the flute in a forest..um...he's in a tree? This is Naruto? Oh, he's French too. Trufax, Issun. Oh, now he's on the water. He really is a nin-HOLY BALLS TO PULLED OUT A LIGHTSABER?! HE'S A JEDI NINJA! What...OH, SO YOU HAVE A SWORD TOO? That's so unnecessary! Oh, you wanna g-YA WANNA GO? COME AT ME, BRO. -My first reaction to Waka from Okami.
"Oh my gosh...are you serious? CMON...CMON! ACCEPT MY KANJI, DAMMIT! SERIOUSLY? Ya know what? Screw the Demon Trial Gates, screw Yami, screw Mr. Fucking Dream and Ballos, THIS is hard! I mean, drawing kanji for a designer...THIS IS SERIOUSLY HARD SHIT. AGGGH. AGGGGH. ACCEPT. MY. FUCKING. KANJI. -Me, doing the endlessly frustrating sidequest for Stray Bead #48 sidequest. Okami players know what I'm talking about.
Things I Hate About Fanfiction
-Stories with obvious grammatical and spelling errors.
-Stories that have almost no plot, unless it's a troll/crackfic.
-People who just take obvious trollfics way too seriously.
-Le flamers. ALL OF THEM.
-Author's notes that are so long they take up half of the story.
-EXTREMELY long chapters. I get a headache by the time I'm done with them. Such colornessnesss! IT BURNSSS.
-People who refuse to update unless they get _ amount of reviews. Seriously, what if your readers are just socially awkward?
-People who just don't give a crap about grammar, punctuation, and spelling (aka mechanics)
-Pairing Wars, fangirls/fanboys who flame every romance story that doesn't contain their pairing. *obviously exaggerated*
-People who bash all of the girls in the story, regardless of their canon personality, just so they can 'justify' their pairing. That's just Kira-like...
-When authors don't give a f* about constructive criticism. It's there for a reason, you know.
-When people don't put crossovers in the crossover section. SERIOUSLY, WHUT. THE FOLDER'S THERE FOR A REASON.
-When people don't bother getting their facts right.
-People over-bashing critics. They're tolerable, and their just trying to help. And death threats don't help.
-When critics delete stories. Um, hello, freedom of the press? And they might be rewriting it as you delete. Give them a chance.
-When people talk like'OMG!!111!1!' or 'ur storie iz Dee bezt in the wOrld1!!1 Moore plez' all the time (aka text talk). Learn to spell, dammit. Unless it's a trollfic. That's the only exception.
-When people don't sort things in general (forums, stories, crossovers, etc.) Seriously, if you're OCD-ish like me, stuff like that is going to nag you for a long time.
-Those dang authors with just WAY to much ego. AGGGGHH. I WANNA THROW A PIANO IN THEIR FACES. AND THEN THROW THEM INTO A PIT OF SPIKY STICKS.
-Chapters that only contain a single event. (Such as 'He dodged an arrow and a mysterious shadow appears! OMG! AN: Kay, that's all for today!')
If you think Meta Knight, Sword, and Blade need way more attention in the anime because they are friggin awsome, copy and paste this to your profile
If you read your own stories or profile just for the heck of it,copy and paste this to your profile
If you think too much swearing is unnecessary,copy and paste this to your profile
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile
If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like to write, copy/paste this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile
If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you like to read what people put in their profiles, and you like Copy & Paste stuff,copy and paste this into your profile.
90 of teens today would die if Myspace had a system failure and was completely destroyed. If you are one of the 10 that would be laughing, copy and paste this to your profile.
If one part of you is calm and the other part like to stand on their head and sing theme songs,copy and paste this to your profile
If you have authors you respect,copy and paste this to your profile
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile!
If you're both insane,copy this into your profile.
If you're a huge fan of Kirby, copy and paste this into your profile.
You know what Mommy
You went to the doctor today.
I can hear that doctor again.
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
Before you take the life of your baby, really consider all your options. Would you rather be fat for a while, or kill your child?
Her dad was a drunk
Her only friend
She always talked to it
Until her parents
A bruise on her leg
But she grabs her bear
She sits in the corner
Such a bad life
Then one night
Then her mom suddenly
She thrusted the blade
The mom walked out
Police showed up
One officer slowly
It must have been bad
(add this to your profile if your against child abuse) (Me: D':)
A Flame Poem-By Meta Knight LOVER
Don't you understand?
Meanwhile, the sweet young author,
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
"Can you raed tihs? Olny srmat poelpe can. I cdnuol't blveiee taht I cluod aulactly uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rsceearch at Cmabridge Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. If you can raed tihs, cpoy and ptsae tihs itno your pofirle."
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded
DON'T READ THIS UNLESS YOU WANT TO BE SCARED OUT OF YOUR MIND!!
there were 3 girls. They were looking through peoples'
SatanStalker: So how do u like my
XxLoVemExX: Who is this anyway??
SatanStalker: Well, you should know;
XxLoVemExX: How do you know that im looking at ur pro??
SatanStalker:I know when people look at my MySpace.
XxLoVemExX: What? That doesnt make
SatanStalker: I just do.
Satanstalker: Especially to pretty girls like you.
Satanstalker: With very nice legs I might say.
At the time the girl was wearing high
She started to pull them down a little bit to cover what
XxLoVemExX: Ok whatever man youre starting to scare the living sht out of me.
SatanStalker: You should be afraid.
SatanStalker: You wouldnt want an ugly guy like me touching your legs huh? I mean thats what you
They were in shock.
Her friend: Holy crap man just block him
The girl: Ok holy crap, you think hes
SatanStalker: I am.
SatanStalker: Well it wouldnt really
XxLoVemExX: What? My house?
SatanStalker: Yeah, youre alone so its
XxLoVemExX: Ok I think Im going to leave now because youre freaking me out.
SatanStalker: Your screen name says
SatanStalker has just signed off.
The girl and her friend were really
Girls friend: Whatever lets just go upstairs trust me I doubt hes really coming. Its just a joke from someone.
They went upstairs and were having a pillow fight.All of a sudden the girls friend said she had to go to the bathroom. The girl said ok.Ten minutes later the girl noticed that her friend was still in the bathroom and was wondering what was up.She goes and knocks but no one said
One scary way to break up
I feel so bad for this girl...don't read it if you're superstitious or get scared easily:
A SCARY WAY TO BREAK UP!! DO NOT stop reading this or something bad will happen!! One day, Sarah was walking home from school when her boyfriend drove by and honked at her to get in. She got in his car and he drove her to the lake. Her boyfriend said he was going to tell her something very important. Sarah could have sworn he was going to propose. However, he flicked her off, pushed her in the lake and yelled, "I am breaking up with you, you awful ...!! I hate you and I think that maybe you should just end your ... life! DUMB ...!!" He laughed and drove off. It was a very cold day. Sarah climbed out of the lake, freezing cold, and feeling the worst she had in her entire life. She got home went in a hot bath, and slit her wrists and died in the bathtub. Her parents yelled and screamed at her to get out until they finally broke the door down. They saw no body, but the entire bathroom was dripping with her blood. Her mom went insane and killed herself three days later, her dad is in prison, accused of murder. Later that week, Sarah's exboyfriend was taking a shower when she came from the drain, rotting and bloody, with a razor in her hand and said "Goodbye Jason." She cut his throat before he could scream. If you do not repost this with the title "1 scary way to break up", you are a heartless ...and Sarah come to you in the shower from the drain, and will kill you the same way she killed her boyfriend. 24 ppl have broken this chain and died you have 13 minutes! Repost this or you will die!add a description
If you're a girl who's tired of people assuming that just because you're a girl you love pink and can't fight to save your life, put this into your profile.
Spread the love with the wonderful PIE! If you like pie and want to share it with others (As long as you still have a piece), copy and paste!
If you consider yourself a WRITER rather than just an AUTHOR, put this in your profile. Writers put emotion into their work. Authors do it for the money.
If you're one of those people who realizes that a frying pan is actually a sufficient weapon, copy and paste this onto your profile.
You can't buy happiness, but you can buy ice cream, and they're pretty much the same thing.
If you are a serial killer, GET THE HECK AWAY FROM ME. If you are a cereal killer, GET THE HECK AWAY FROM MY FRUIT LOOPS.
"Some see the glass half full, some see it half empty. Me? I just want to know who the heck is drinking my dang soda"
It takes 47 muscles to frown, 17 to smile but it doesn't take any to sit there with a dumb look on your face.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile
If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this onto your profile.
If you see no point in making the bed because you are just going to unmake it, copy and paste this into your profile,
A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.
If you believe every child deserves a chance to grow up and go to school, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think it's stupid that girls are associated with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile.
I don't write slash! If you don't write slash, copy and paste this into your profile.
What would you do-OOO-oo for a Klondike Bar? Well, If you're like Princess Leia, you would shoot a bunch of Stormtroppers who just happen to have some.
Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?
Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cacao beans, and all beans are a vegetable?
This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and even if you don't.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t re-post it?
Re-post this if you truly believe in God, and even if you don't.
F is for friends who do stuff together
U is for you and me
N is for anywhere and any time at all down here in the deep blue sea
COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE IF YOU THINK SPONGEBOB ROCKS!!!!
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.
I'm the kind of girl who walks into a door and apologizes.
I'm the kind of girl who would rather act stupid than smart.
I'm the kind of girl who would burst out laughing in a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
I'm the kind of girl who would get fired at the M&M's company for throwing out the W's.
I'm the kind of girl who gets drunk off soda and loves every minute of it
My name is Tiffany
I am three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren’t ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can’t do a wrong
I can’t speak at all
Or else im locked up
All day long.
When im awake im all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren’t home
When my mommy does come home
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe ill just get
One whipping tonight.
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie’s bar.
I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself
Against the wall
I try to hide
From his evil eyes
I’m so afraid now
I’m starting to cry
He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault
He suffers at work.
He slaps and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And run to the door
He’s already locked it
And i start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken,
"I’m sorry!", I scream
But its now much to late
His face has been twisted
Into a unimaginable shape
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
O please God, have mercy!
O please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door
While i lay there motionless
Brawled on the floor
My name is tiffany
I am three,
Tonight my daddy
And you can help
Sickens me top the soul,
And if you read this
and don’t pass it on
I pray for your forgiveness
Because you would have to be
One heartless person
To not be effected
By this Poem
And because you are effected,
Do something about it!
So all i ask you to do
Is pass this on!IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE
getting HIGH meant swinging at the playground?
the worst thing you could get from boys was c0oties?
'm 0 m' (was your hero)
and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?
and your WORST ENEMIES were your siblings
and race issues were about who ran the fastest?
when-WAR-was a card game
and life was simple and carefree?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?
Put this in your profile if you're still 5 inside...no matter how old you are.
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love!
Stop the Pairing Wars!
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.
Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong! Please do your part to end it!
If you don't do drugs (They are nasty), copy/paste this into your profile.
If you want a game/cartoon/anime/OC character to be real, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think you might be slightly psychotic, copy this on your profile
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, post this in your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile
List your favorite characters in no particular order and act as if you were actually in the game, then ask the following questions:
4. Luigi (he deserves respect!)
6. Light (the innocent one)
9. The Great Mighty Poo (he's hilarious!)
What would you do if Number 1 woke you up in the middle of the night?
Eh. Mello probably ruined his Lego tower or something.
Number 3 walked into the bathroom while you're showering?
GET THE HELL OUT OR I'LL BLAST YOU INTO A MILLION PIECES, YOU PERVERT!
Number 4 announced he/she's going to marry 9 tomorrow?
Number 5 cooked you dinner?
It's probably cake. Yummy!
Number 6 was lying next to you on the beach, sleeping?
pokes* L, what did you do?
Number 7 suddenly confessed to be part of your family?
So, I'm basically an Overlord? Cool! Where's the realm I rule over? ARE THERE DRAGONS?
Number 8 got into the hospital somehow?
Kirby, I told you not to eat my explosive pies...
Number 9 made fun of your friends?
Conker, can I borrow some toilet paper?
Number 10 ignored you all the time?
Huh. Maybe I'm causing him to get visions.
Two serial killers are hunting you down. What will 1 do?
He'd hunt them down and arrest them. Simple.
You're on a vacation with 2 and manage to break your leg. What does 2 do?
He would tell his minions to carry me, cause I like helping him hunt down Mario (as long as he doesn't go too far)
It's your birthday. What does 3 get you?
Probably some sciency thing. Honestly, I don't wanna know.
You're stuck in a house that's on fire. What does 4 do?
He would panic, run around the house, and scream, "MAAAARIIOOOO!"
You're about to do something that'll make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will 5 do?
Watch while eating cake.
You're about to marry number 10. What's 1's reaction?
Near: Isn't he kinda old for you? Me: Yeah, we're just doing this to ambush Freeza and finish him once and for all.
You got dumped by someone. How will 7 cheer you up?
He would laugh at my misery. Then Flonne would scold him for being a meanie. :D
You compete in a tournament. How does 9 support you?
He would sing a song about me and throw poo at the other contestants.
You can't stop laughing. What will 10 do?
Lol with me, cause we finally destroyed Freeza! VICTORY!
Number 1 is all you've ever dreamed of. Why?
I always thought he might be a shinigami...it explains the no eating/sleeping thing...
Number 2 tells you about his/her deeply hidden love for number 9.
Bowser, how hard did Mario hit you? Or did someone finally get a concussion after all that go-karting?
You're dating 3 and he/she introduces you to her parents. Would you get along?
Mao is an orphan. Besides, he loves Raspberyl. We all know that.
Will number 5 and 6 ever kiss?
Well LxLight is one of the only gay pairings I support...
Number 6 appears to be a player, breaking many hearts. What do you do?
Ugh, looks like Kira took over again. *splits personalities and puts them into different bodies*
You had a haircut and 7 can't stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?
You know, you can't be the only one with cool hair, Laharl.
Number 8 thinks he/she’ll never get a girl/boyfriend. What will you tell him/her?
pushes Kirby toward Jigglypuff*
Number 9 is too shy to face you and confesses their love by sending an email. Now what?
Please stop trolling people. Nobody will listen to your songs.
You spot 10 kissing 1. How do you react?
Near: What a terrible movie... Me: I know, right? Bardock: What's the director's name again? Me: No! Bad Bardock! No killing!
You notice that 3 and 4 have been inside that hotel room for MORE than a few hours. What are you thinking?
MAO! YOU BETTER BE PLAYING VIDEO GAMES WITH HIM!
Could 1 and 6 be soul mates?
Light belongs with L, silly!
Would 2 trust 5?
No. Carnivores and sugar addicts don't mix well.
Number 4 is bored and pokes 10. What happens after that?
Bardock: What? Is there a ghost behind me or something? Luigi: *takes out Poltergust 3000*
If 5 and 1 are forced to go back to school together. What study will they pick?
Something to do with crime solving. Is there a class for that?
If 6 and 3 cooked dinner what would they make?
Light would probably be doing all the work while Mao plays his Slaystation.
If 7 and 9 apply for a job. What job?
The Poo would probably sign up as Laharl's servant.
If 8 gives 5 a haircut. Is that okay?
Kirby's arms are too stubby. He would try a few times, then inhale all of L's sweets and run.
If 9 sketches what 6's perfect girl/boyfriend should look like, will 6 be happy?
The drawing would be hard to see, cause it would be covered in poo.
10 and 9 are blushing while they talk. What is their conversation about?
What would happen if 1 accidentally kicked 10?
Bardock:...really kid? Really? Near: But you took my Legos...
If 2 sent a message to his/her Bf/Gf but 9 got it. What would happen?
Poo: YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?! Bowser: I know. The King of Awesome was too awesome for her.
If 5 and 6 did a workout together?
FOOD FIIGHT!...Wait, what?
If 6 noticed he/she wasn't invited to your birthday?
Me: Sorry, Light. Wait, any Death Notes? Light: *checks pockets and watch* Nope. Me: Kay, you're invited, come in please!
If 7 won the lottery?
Laharl: HELL YEAH!
If 8 had quite a big secret?
Me: YOU'RE BULIMIC?!?!?! Kirby: Poyo... :'(
If 9 became a singer?
Isn't he already one?
If 10 got a daughter?
Bardock: Kakkarot, Raditz, meet your sister.
What would 1 think of 2?
Near: I don't approve of your ways. (yeah...idk.)
How would 3 greet 4?
Mao: Fuck off. Luigi: Wah!
What would 4 envy about 5?
Luigi: Wow, this guy has a lot of respect...
What dream would 5 have about 6?
Light cooking a giant strawberry cheesecake for L.
What do 6 and 7 have in common?
Uh...they're names both start with L? Oh, and they both have a mean and a nice side too.
What would make 7 angry at 8?
Laharl: NO! RIGHT WHEN I GOT ETNA'S PUDDING!
Where would 8 meet 9?
In the shitmountain.
What would 9 never dare to tell 10?
He was tempted to throw poo at him.
What would make 10 scared of 1?
Bardock: This guy...he wears so much white...he MUST be hiding something...
Is 3 Gay?
Nah, I don't...hm...maybe...uh...
OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense,who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common sense let out tears of pain when a teacher get's 6 months of jail for asking other teachers to lead a prayer, yet a drug dealer gets 3 days, a spouse beater get's 3 months, and assault gets you 1 month.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion, or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
If you will stick up for your friends (fanfic friends count) no matter what, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are one of the few that actually has any regard to the rules of FanFiction.Net, copy and paste this into your profile.
I have pride in my writing. This means that I will not use my age, disability, or lack of spell check as an excuse for poor writing. Even if English is not my first language, I will not use this fact as a shield against criticism. If you have pride in your writing, copy and paste this into your profile.
Just wanted to try this out...
YOUR GUY SIDE:
You love hoodies.
YOUR GIRL SIDE:
You wear lip gloss/stick.
You wear eyeliner.
Total: 2 (Lol, what a fail.)
If you think the first 8 seconds of Twilight is torture, and if you couldn't make it through the whole thing, and you wish that you could forget it all, copy and paste this into your profile.
No event is complete without theme music. If you have ever started humming/singing your own theme music, copy and paste this into your profile.
99.5 of teenagers don't understand that love can be used non-romantically. If you are the .5 that knows love has a romantic and only-friendly meaning, copy and paste it into your profile.
If you are one of the proud teens/adults who have a v-o-c-a-b-u-l-a-r-y and do not limit themselves to "omg!" and "Like, that is, like, so, like, totally awsome...!". copy and paste this into your profile.
If you beat the Subspace Emissary, copy and paste this to your profile!
If you are part of the .0000001 percent of people who don't have a MySpace, copy this onto your profile.
98 of teenagers say "I Love You" and don't mean it. If you are one of the 2 that means it, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you don't think werewolves MUST be evil, copy and paste it into your profile! (they can be tsunderes though)
Most People think Peach can do better... this is WRONG because love chooses who they want. Appearances do not count in love. Mario and Peach are pure souls literally made for each other. Copy and Paste this if you think the original nintendo couple should stay as it is.
Mario also doesn't get a lot of attention. Luigi and Bowser do... if you check most fanfics it is about those two. Mario is getting rejected and I hate that. I have nothing against Luigi or Bowser, just that they are always with Peach and people say they get less attention. Mario is going into extinction. Copy and Paste this if you don't want this plumber to die!
If you enjoy watching people get kicked in the groin, copy this onto your profile.
98 percent of teenagers drink or have been around alcohol, put this in your profile if you like MUFFINS!
If you are a Nintendo fan to your very core, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think Ike isn't cheap, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think Mr. Game and Watch IS cheap, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you love animals, copy and paste this into your profile
98 percent of teens have been drunk or high. Paste this into your profile if you like bagels. to the list: GiratinaB, golfer, Kiwipichu890
If you like to read what people put in their profiles, And you like Copy & Paste stuff, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile.
That same 98 would probably turn suicidal if Myspace was down for 48 hours. If you're part of the 2 that would laugh their asses off at their pain, copy and paste this into your profile.
I just saw a video, made secretly, of dogs, racoons, etc, being skinned alive in china. I could only watch the begining, of a racoon pup and its mum, being smacked in the face, with a log.YOU HEAR ME?! A LOG! How cruel is that? Who could be so dead inside, to have to hurt a pup,or any animal! If you agree with me, to have a stop to animal abuse of any kind, please, copy & paist this into your profile. (The bible says we hold dominion over animals. It means we take care of them. Not abuse them!)
If you probably need a life but have no intentions of getting one, put it on your profile.
If you would love someone because of their personality but not because of their looks, put this in your profile.
Crud on the Dark side! So what if they have cookies? Come and join the LIGHT side! Why? Here's why!
1. WE have waffles! Do you like waffles?
2. Dang their recruitment bunny! WE have TEXT KIRBY! Copy and Paste him to achive world domination! c('.'c)
3. Okay, I don't care really, but to those who do, we have Edward Cullen, Zack Efron, and Chuck Norris.
4. WE GET WHITE ROBES OF EPICNESS! The Dark side have stupid black blankies.
5. We get to come down from the heavens with shiny lights to make us awesome and cryptic!
6. And they need servants to do their bidding? How lazy! Have you ever seen a fat person on the light side? We get a free health club too!
7. And they have money. Big. Whoop. Have you ever noticed how loved people are when they save people from the bad guys? The government normally gives them a ton of doe afterwards.
8. When you save the world, people like you more, they don't curse your name, you get a fun job, and they normally grant you free property, rendering how taking over the world is pointless. And the bad guys never really win.
9. Oh, and WE have cute puffballs! Wanna hug Metty? (Holds up Meta knight)
If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile
If you don't know why people can't get it through their heads that members of the opposite gender can just be friends, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever spent a long amount of time looking for something that you were holding/wearing, copy this to your profile
If you have ever swore, copy and paste this to your profile
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile (for me, it was the bible. Seriously.)
Girls don't realize these things
But most of all
Most Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with jerks who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'
If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BRAINS AND A HEART to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things' I really wish that more guys were like this, and I bet alot of girls do too.
If you are a Christian, copy and paste this into your profile,If you aren't a Christian, copy and paste this into your profile anyways, We are good peoples! And I won't bug you about anything! I'm here to write stories, not tell you you need to live the way I do!! And if you have a problem, I will (Me: What happened to the rest of this? :l)
Why do they call me gay?
I fell in love with a wonderful girl when my life wasn't a war.
Her name was Sheeda, and she was so beautiful.
I loved her very much, and I think she loved me back.
But then, she was killed, her last word was my name.
I cried until my eyes ran dry.
My sister and I were both in danger, she knew she was going to die, but she didn't tell me.
She simply gave me her tiara and said to remeber her. And then she left me like Sheeda did.
I wear it to remind myself of her, and I don't cut my hair as a sign of remeberance.
Yet even though I try to be a good man, everyone laughs at me.
They tease me for my sister's crown. They call me gay, or tease me for my name by calling me "Martha".
They treat me like a freak because they don't know my past.
Did I do something wrong?
Did I make them mad?
If I did, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry my hair isn't short like other boys.
I'm sorry that I'm sensitive because I don't want to turn bitter.
I'm sorry that I have my own identity, and that It's not good enough for you.
Why do they call me a wuss?
I was brave, until my mother, who died and left my brother and I to fend for oursleves.
Animals were my only comfort. One of my best friends was a dog named Boney.
My life went up in flames when I was forced to kill the only person that I loved and cared about me.
I had to kill my own brother to save everyone. So now no one that I loved is left besides the creatures that cared about me.
Even though I try to be stronger, everyone hates me.
They tease me for the day I was with Ness, My only other friend. When Wario came and took him. I was scared and worried, and didn't know what to do.
I ran so I wouldn't have to see Ness leave me Like my Mother and Brother.
But now everyone calls me a wuss.
They call me a horrible word that I don't want to ever let come from my mouth.
They call me it because I don't want to fight.
Was I being a bad person?
Was there anything else I could do?
If there was, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that no one taught me to be brave.
I'm sorry no one loved me.
I'm sorry that the only thing I could do was run away.
I'm sorry that no one could help me to be the person you want me to be.
Why do they call me a clone?
I can't control what I do in a game.
I'm not the one who wanted to have it be this way.
I didn't want it like this!
If I had it how I wanted, no one would be hurt! The planet would never have fighting! Peace would be the only thing to spread! And I could be who I want to!
I wouldn't be forgotten.
I wouldn't be a copy.
I wouldn't be someone's puppet.
When I was somewhat cared about, was I not good enough?
When I was in a Super smash bros game, was I not doing my best?
If I wasn't I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I don't get a say in anything I do.
I'm sorry I'm just a play-thing to you.
I'm sorry I can't have one unique thing about me to please you.
Meta knight's story
Why do they call me cold?
I used to open and friendly had a friend who treated me like a living being with feelings and a heart.
His Name was Jerca, and he saw something in me.
He cared about me and he felt like a brother to me. We were both in the army, and fought side by side.
But then, when true danger struck across our homeland, he was captured and I was left to feel like I was the cause of his death.
But then, he came back, and I was overly joyful. . .until I saw that our enemy had turned him into a monster.
I couldn't stand to see him like this.
I had to do the one thing that I swore I never wanted to do.
In no time, my sword had gone through his chest.
He gained some sense and while his heart pumped just a few more beats, he put something in my trembling glove. A locket, when I opened it, it was a picture of a baby. He breathed out that it was his son, his love for the baby was what set him free of the curse.
Then he died.
I didn't want that to ever happen to anyone I knew or cared about ever again. So I decided not to love anymore.
I don't want to be left hurting like that again.
Does that make me cold-hearted?
Does that mean you think I'm being mean?
If it does, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that you didn't know that when no one's around, I cry like a baby, wishing someone would hold me.
I'm sorry I was never shown not to feel this way.
I'm sorry that you don't understand, and that you don't look at me like Jerca did.
Why? They call me evil.
Even though some characters aren't real, people treat them like trash. If you know that the stuff said about these characters in this poem is true, put this in your profile. Oh, and you have to C/P ALL of it. NOT just part of it! Either you agree that people are mean, or don't agree people are mean.
If you like the rain copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile
If you know our society is moving in the wrong direction, copy and paste this into your profile.
"When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand oranges."
If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away then remebered, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.
95 percent of teen & pre-teen girls would have a nervous breakdown if Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers were standing on the edge of a tower, ready to jump. Copy and paste this onto your profile if you're part of the 5 percent of people yelling "Jump, Bitches!"
Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27, 2006, because it was "too small" and "off its orbit" for some scientists' likings. If you think Pluto should still be a planet, copy and paste this to your profile.
THE Pledge of Dragon Ball/Z/GT/Kai
Dragon Ball Pact:
IF YOU THINK THAT DRAGONBALL/Z/GT IS MORE AWESOME THAN NARUTO REPOST THIS IN YOUR PROFILE!
99.8 percent of anime fans are obsessing over Naruto. If you are the last few of the clan who can think up three better animes than this, paste this on your profile. (Let's see, DBZ, Death Note, and season 0 of YGO.)
If one part of you is calm and the other part like to stand on their head and sing theme songs,copy and paste this to your profile
Normal people VS. YuGiOh fans
Normal people: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast.
Normal people: say OMG!
NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or I'll tell on you!
Normal people: Think bad guys are very ugly
Normal people: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!
Normal People: get nervous or scared during thunderstorms.
Normal People: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation.
Normal people: Would be scared when they see people in purple cloaks chasing them.
Normal people: Get freaked out when they see scary people on motorcycles
Normal people: Think YuGiOh is just a stupid children’s card game.
Normal people: Think little people are stupid.
Normal people: Would never go to an orphanage.
Normal people: Think Egypt is stupid.
Normal people: Would never buy too expensive things because they might become out of money.
Normal People: Solve all their problems by suing people.
Copy and paste this into your profile if you love Yu-Gi-Oh!
If you come up with most of your fanfic ideas by laying in bed staring at the moon, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name; Medalis, Starbrook, PitFTW, green-girl09, Kiwipichu890
Okay, take 3 minutes and try this...it will freak you out...BUT NO CHEATING!
This game has a funny/spooky outcome.
Don't read ahead...just do it in order! It's worth a try.
First..get a pen and paper. When you actually choose names, make sure it's people you actually know and go with your first instinct.
Scroll down one line at a time...and don't read ahead or you'll ruin it!
1. First, write the numbers 1 through 11 in a column.
2. Then, beside numbers 1 and 2, write down any two numbers you want.
3. Beside the 3 and 7, write down the names of members of the opposite sex.
4. Write anyone's name (like friends or family...) in the 4th, 5th, and 6th spots.
5. Write down four song titles in 8,9,10, and 11. (Go with your instincts!)
6. Finally, make a wish.
And now the key for the game...
1. You must tell (the number in space 2) people about this game.
2. The person in space 3 is the one that you love.
3. The person in 7 is one you like but can't work out.
4. You care most about the person you put in 4.
5. The person you name in number 5 is the one who knows you very well.
6. The person you name in 6 is your lucky star.
7. The song in 8 is the song that matches with the person in number 3.
8. The title in 9 is the song for the person in 7.
9. The tenth space is the song that tells you most about YOUR mind.
10. 11 is the song telling you how you feel about life
NOW...post this bulletin (don't reply) within the hour. IF you do, your wish will come true...
If you don't it will become the opposite.
If you get tons of ideas, but end up throwing most of them out because they eventually sound stupid, copy and paste this onto your profile.
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