Author has written 2 stories for Naruto.
Well, currently I am working on my story called Well, This is New. I'm putting my complete focus on it and all other ideas I've thought of are being summarized and written in my notebook!
A quick warning, most of my stories will be about my OCs and my stories will most likely contain malexmale pairings or no pairings.
Just to let you all know that I'm not changing anything about the stories I write. If you don't like what happened or think something different than what I had planned should happen in future chapters, well...all I can say that I will ignore all of those type of reviews.
To those of you who review my stories, I would like to thank you. All and every reviews lifts me into a writing mood and encourages me to write chapters faster which means faster updates.
To those of you who flames me about mistakes in the story, I would like to thank you. I know that not all reviews are nice and good, that there will be some that point out mistakes in my stories and I would like to thank you for taking the time to point out my mistakes.
To those of you who flames for no reason at all, stop reading my stories. If you don't like what happens or just don't like it at all, then leave. No one is making you read my stories, unless you were dared to.
That's all I have to say! Read, Enjoy, and Review my stories! *waves*
The sorting hat says that I belong in...Slytherinr!
Gryffindor: 65%, Ravenclaw: 62%, Hufflepuff: 52%, and Slytherin: 72%
Said Slytherin, "We'll teach you just these whose ancestry is purest."
Name: used to be shi-no-tenshi01, then quiet-yaoi-fangirl...now I am Lady Arachne
Looks: I have mid-night, black hair that reaches down to the back of my neck and dark brown eyes. I am mixed with mexican and african-american so my skin is like a soft chocolate brown color.
Personality:I tend to be the wallflower whenever I'm in public, mainly because I like to daydream. I am a daydreamer so I tend to blank out in the middle of something. When I am with my friends or family I am a loud, short-temperd person. I like to stick with the group and try to keep up with things. I tend to make 'gah' noises when I either drop something or trip. I love animals and nature, I wish to be a veternarian(sp?) and join a save the planet program. My favorite animals are white tigers, lions, and wolves. My favorite food are pizza, nachos, taco, hamburgers, hot dogs, and inchaladas(sp?). My favorite people from animes are the Akatsuki, Suigetsu, Juugo, Gaara, Lee, Sesshomaru, Naraku, Hakudoshi, Konna, Kimimaru, Zero, Aido, Ikuto and Yuro, Utua, Kukai, Nadeshiko(and her boy self), Reborn, and Hibari.
DOB: April, 12
Hobbies: Reading, Drawing, Reading fanfictions, thinking of fanfictions to write, playing outside with my friends, looking at clouds and stars, and randomly staring into space.
Favortite animes: Naruto, Inuyasha, Elfen Lied, Bleach, Shugo Chara, Eureka Seven, Abenobashi Mahou Shotengai, Fullmetal Alchemist, Death Note, Vampire Knight, Katekyo Hitman Reborn, Hellsing, Soul Eater
Favorite Songs: Time to Fly by Hilary Duff, This is Halloween by Marylin Manson, Eye to Eye by A Goofy Movie, Stand Out by A Goofy Movie, American Pyscho by Treble Charger, Triple baka by Vocaloid, Alice of human sacrifice by Vocaloid
Current Obession:Harry Potter, especially Harry Potter slash stories.
SeverusHarry(I love this pairing. I think that Severus could use some loving!)
LuciusHarry(Kind of a hot pairing, on the top of my favorite Harry Potter pairings)
TomHarry(Not the bartender Tom, Tom Marvollo Riddle! I love it when these two are paired together!)
VoldemortHarry(Yeah, most people don't like this pairing, with him having a snake face. But I like it!)
FredHarryGeorge(I love this pairing!! I don't mind is they're all together or just one of the twins being paired with Harry!)
DracoHarry(This is a more common Harry Potter slash pairing, but I like it!)
LuciusSeverus(I love it when these two are paired together. I love it even more when the story is about them still in school!)
TomSeverus(I only read one story with this pairing, and I think the author discontinued it *pouts*. I would love to read more fanfics of this pairing! So to the people who are reading this, if you know of a story that has Tom Marvollo Riddle paired with Sever please PM me the title and/or the author who wrote it!!)
SiriusSeverus(I like this pairing, but I love it even more when it is written in the Maruader's(sp?) Era!!!!)
RemusSeverus (I adore this pairing!! Especially when it is written in the Maruader's Era!!! To the people who are reading this, if you know a story with this pairing and it is set in the Maruader's Era, please tell me!!!!)
RemusSirius(Not my most favorite, but I still like it!!)
JamesLily(Yeah, that's right! I can like het pairings!! But only a few, not that much)
FredGeorge(Gotta love the twincest!!)
LuciusArthur(I only read one story with this pairing, but I like it!!!)
FredDracoGeorge (I would love to read more about these three!!!)
KyuuNaru(Not female!Kyuubi, male!Kyuubi!!!! I love this pairing!)
ItaNaru(This pairing is interesting!)
SasuNaru(Another common yaoi pairing, but it is good!)
AkatsukiNaruto(Meaning that I like it when Naruto is paired with one of the Akatsuki members, except Konan.)
GaaNaru (I love this pairing!! I really love it when they are paired before the Chuunin Exams!!! Gaara being cold and a killer, but shows emotions only to Naruto!!! To the people that are reading this, if you know of a story with this pairing like this, please PM me tell!!!!)
I have joined the Review Revolution.
I, Lady Arachne, do solemnly swear to review all the fics I read, regardless of the number of reviews, its age, or anything else. I have joined the Review Revolution. Because real authors alwaysleave reviews! Copy and Paste this onto your profile to join the Revolution.
10 Reasons Gay Marriage is wrong!
1.Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, birth control and air conditioning.
2.Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3.Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4.Marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all: women are property, matches are arranged in childhood, blacks can't marry whites, Catholics can't marry Jews, divorce is illegal, and adultery is punishable by death
5.Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6.Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7.Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8.Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9.If we look to the word of God, His punishment for sexual immorality is equal to that of murder. Therefore, teaching kids to tolerate homosexuality is equal to teaching them to tolerate murder.
10. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
If you support gay marriage and want to show it, paste this into your profile.
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
Post this in your profile if you believe Homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it.
We've got an educational system that's in the shitter, we've got a war going on, there's on thing after another, and what did our President think was important? Queers. That's what's important! That somehow, if we could stop the gays from getting married, everything else would turn out just fine! Everything would change - there'd besolar energy! The Sunni's and the Shiite's would lay down their arms: "He stopped the Queers! I love you too."
Ibelieve that the reason that it's difficult for the gay community to be integrated into this society at large, the way they should be, is because there are no champions for them in Congress or in the White House. And that is the way that every group of people has basically been integrated into society. That's the way it works.
Instead, you have people like Rick Santorum, a senator from Pennsylvania, who says things that he should think and...shut his fucking mouth. You can go ahead and think it, that's fine, but you don't say aloud that homosexuality is a threat to the American family. Because that's prejudice. That's complete and utter prejudice and ignorance, on a level that is staggering at this point in time. It's very similar to the prejudice that the Jews faced when it was thought that during the first night of Passover that we would go into the Christian community and kidnap the firstborn of Christian families and kill it! And that, for those of you who don't realize, is bullshit! We would've kidnapped the child and made him work for us, and that's a big difference.
Homosexuality is a threat to the American family, are you kidding me? How? No one ever explains it. How? It's like there's a Jehovah's Witnesses of Gaydom! "Hi, we're here and we're Queer, we're here and we're Queer!" "I brought swatches, I brought swatches!"
But maybe I'm wrong! Maybe there are a group of Gay Banditos! Who get into a van everyday and wander from village to dell. And as night begins to fall, they go back into a suburban neighborhood, to that cul de sac, where only one house stands. And in the window, a young American family is just sitting down for their first meal. And these Queers...theseQueers...don their black cloaks and hoods and matching pumps - very tasteful - and they charcoal up their faces and they sneak up to that house and open the door and start: FUCKING EACH OTHER IN THE ASS!!
And another American family is destroyed!
Lewis Black, Red White & Screwed Performance(If you think Lewis Black is a genius, post this in your profile.)
1. Flame me because I write gay pairings, and I'll tear your ego into tiny little bits. I can do it, trust me.
"Yeah, Yeah I got it! No wait, I lost it."- Tyler from fight club
"Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever, you keep on talking."-Anonymous
"The best liar is the liar who hardly lies."-JUCHKO
"I've been to the dark side man...they don't have cookies...T.T."
"Of course I'm out of my mind...it's dark and scary in there."
"Note to self: it's illegal to stab people for being stupid."
"Courage is what it takes to stand up and talk; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen."-Winston Churchill
"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."
"There are three kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't."
"Don't run in my footsteps, I run into walls."
"If first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried."
"1 in every 4 people is insane. Look at your three best friends; if it's not them, it's you."
"What if everyone else is weid and I'm the one that's normal?"
"When life hands you donuts, you eat them."
"I didn't trip, I was testing gravity...it still works."
"A best friend is the best weapon you have on the battlefield."
"Why am I afraid of the dark? Because of the inherent absence of light."
"Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was frames."
" I used all my sick days, so I called in dead."
"No, I won't go to hell! It has a restraining order on me."
"Yeah I'm a loser, but the coolest loser you'll ever meet."
"You're jealous because the voices only talk to me."
"When life gives you lemons, throw them back because, really? Who likes lemons?"
"When life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's face and see how Life likes lemons then."
"Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up to."
"Dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all comitted suicide."
"Your'e weirdness is creeping out my imaginary friend."
"I used to be normal...until I met those freaks called my friends."
"Don't worry about the world ending today; it's already tomorrow in Australia."
"When it rains on my party, I whip out a slip 'n slide."
"There is no 'I' in TEAM, but there is an 'I' in PIE and there is also an 'I' in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM."
"If your heart was really broken, you'd be dead, so shut up."
"I'm telling you this because you don't get it. You think you get it, which isn't the same as actually getting it, get it?"-Kakashi!
"I'm a ninja." "No you aren't." "Did you see that?" "See what?" "Exactly."
"I'm not cheating; I'm effectively giving myseld the advantage."
"That which does not kill me better run fast!"
"Guys...just because you have one doesn't mean you have to be one."
"I'm not clusmy, the floor just hates me."
"The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on."
"Smirk, it makes people wonder what you're up to, while scarying the shit out of them at the same time."
"Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over. So I'm immortal."
"You're wrong. Just stand there in your wrongness and be wrong!"
"There is nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and lose is when it's weird."
"It's always the last place you look. Of course it is. Why would you keep looking when you already found it?"
"Never knock on Death's door. Ring the door bell and run like hell. He hates that."
"I'm not littering, I'm donating to the Earth."
"The newscaster is the person who says 'Good Morning' and then tells you why it isn't."
"Want to know who your real friends are? Mess up and see who is still there."
"Don't look at me with that tone of voice."
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and notices he was the only black man there. As he sat down he noticed a white man behind him. The white man said, "Colored people aren't aloud here." The black man turned around and said, "When I was born I was black, when I grew up I was black, when I'm sick I am black, when I'm cold I am black and when I die I will be black. But you sir...when you're born you're pink, when you grow up you're white, when you're sick, you're green, when you go into the sun you're red and when you're cold you turn blue and when you die you'll turn purple. And you have the nerve to call me colored." The black man turned back around and the white man walked away.
"Huh? Sorry, my ears don't respond to bitches."
"Death is Life's way of saying you're fired."
"Dam you to hell."
"You know, logic has a brother. His name is SHUT THE HELL UP."
"The only thing to fear is feari itself...and spiders."
"Rules are made to be broken, bounds are made to be tested, and if it comes down to following the rules or doing what is right, I'll break these so called rules that stand in my way."
"Blame everything on your mood, but add that it's the truth."
"Are you rasing your voice to me?" "No, I'm rasing my voice to this fucking spoon in my hand!"
"I get plenty of exercise: jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck, and dodging deadlines."
"Life is a bitch because if it were a slut it'd be easy."
"Someone shoed me a glass of water half-full and asked me if it was half-full or half-emtpy? So I drank the water. No more problem."
"To live a creative lifr, we must lose our fear in being wrong."
"I don't agree with a word you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."-Voltaire
"One thing I only know, and that is that I know nothing."-Socrates
"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."
"I'm trying to think, don't confuse me with facts."-Plato
"Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity."
"I'm knot a blonde! I'm knot, I'm knot, I'm knot!"
"No guy is worth your tears and the one that is won't make you cry."
"Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm."
"Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence."
"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing!"
"My loyalty cannot be bought, however, it can be rented."
"I don't believe in plastic surgery, but in your case, go ahead."
"Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."
"I’m impressed, I’ve never met such a small mind inside such a big head before."
"I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here."
"A man likes his wife to be just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness, and just stupid enough to admire it."
"Copying from a single source is called plagiarism, copying from multiple sources is called research."
"Always forgive your enemies, but never forget their names."
"Money can’t buy you happiness, but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery."
"Push will get a person almost anywhere-except through a door marked “pull.”"
"The two most common elements in the world are hydrogen and stupidity."
"The worst way to miss someone is to have them sitting right next to you and you know you can never have them."
"Adults are just kids with money."
"Men are like roses: watch out for all of the pricks."
"I am a nice shark, not a mindless eating machine. If I am to change this image, I must first change myself. Fish are friends, not food!"
"You've got two legs and a heartbeat, what's stopping you?"
"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."
"Letting go doesn’t mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be."
"It is impossible to discourage the true writers--they don't give a damn about what you think; they're just going to write."
"Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far."
"Nice sword, wanna slash?"
"The most determined apples are always eatin' first"
"Almost every problem in life can be solved with a FIST TA THA FAYCE!! Just not yours or mine."
"The right to swing my fist ends where the others face begins"
"Personal opinions are to be shoved up your personal ass"
For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
If you love Naruto so much you wish the characters were real so you coud be one of them, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever dreamed about being an Anime Character, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you avoid teen fads and don't live your life according to others copy and paste this.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have your own little world & like it that way, Copy & paste this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more then five consecutive minutes, Copy & paste this into your profile.
If you have ever burst out laughing in an empty room, paste this on your profile.
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Maximum Ride, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone:Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager, AliceDaSpaz, Skittle.Rocker, Fangalicious, Bellafan123, Vampire-cutie18,Maru-chan 101, White Rose Of Oddity, Naruhinagirl94, SammywithSwagger, Tsuki Kiba Kummori, Kakashi Forever, Aristotle29, Lady Arachne.
Anime is Life. Manga is life. Life is good. Parents suck for not buying you more life. If you agree, copy and paste this to your profile.
Reviews are always welcomed, even if you don't like the story. It is always good to know how to improve on my stories and how to make them better. Good? Bad? Grammar issues? Boring? Annoying? Something I missed? You get the idea, but as I said ... I love reviews!!! And I give away cookies to those who do!! *cough*notrealcookies*cough*...
number your 12 favourite Naruto charakters (in no order) and answer the questions:
1.)Have you ever read a 6./11. fanfiction before?
2.)Do you think 4. is hot? How hot?
Kakuzu, short of..
3.)What would happen if 12. got 8. pregnant?
Gaara got Pein pregnant? Shouldn't it be the other way around?
4)Do. you recall any fics about 9.?
Itachi, only a thousand times! All yaoi!!
5.)Would 2. and 6. make a good cuple?
Deidara/Kakashi, I guess they would
6.)5./9. or 5./10.?
Hidan/Itachi or Hidan/Konan, both are good pairings, but I'm going to go with Hidan/Itachi!!
7.)What would happen if 7. walked in on 2. and 12. doing it?
Zetsu walks in on Deidara and Gaara doing it...licks his lips then descends into the ground.
8.)Make up a summary of a 3./10. fanfiction.
Sasori/Konan, Summary: Being an artist can be tough when one loses their muse. Will Sasori learn that a special someone will help him in more ways than one?
9.)Is there any such thing as a 1./8. fluff?
Tobi/Pein, hell yeah!
10.)Suggest a title for a 7./12. fanfiction.
Zetsu/Gaara, Of Plants and Sand
11.)What kind of plot would you use if you wanted 4. to deflower 1.?
Kakuzu/Tobi, won't happen..Tobi's too innocent and Zetsu won't allow it.
12.)does anyoune of your friends know who 3. is?
Sasori, they don't even know Naruto even exists.
13.)has anyone of your friends drawn 11.?
Kisame, look above
14.)would anyone of your friends like 2./4./5.?
Deidara/Kakazu/Hidan, don't know
15.)What might 10. scream at a moment of great passion?
Konan, don't know...and will never want to!!
16.)If you wrote a 1./6./12. fic, what would the warning be?
Tobi/Kakashi/Gaara, don't know
17.)If you wrote a song-fic about 8., what song would you chose?
Pein, "Pain" by Three Days Grace
18.)What might be a good pick up line for 10. to use on 2.?
Konan on Deidara, I can do better than your hands *wink wink*
19.)How might 11. describe relationship between 2. and 8.?
Kisame describing relationship between Deidara and Pein, weird yet somewhat funny.
20.)how emo is 7.?
Zetsu, he isn't.
37 Things to do in an Elevator
1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
I don't care if you're gay or straight,everybody needs love.
I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday
I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends I'm a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.
I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to "teach me a lesson" --IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG... REPOST THIS--
If you are part of the unanimous club of Sakura-bitch haters, copy and paste this to your profile
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the fsrit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed this psas it on.
This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?
Repost this if you truly believe in God.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
Try Not To Cry
Mommy... Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great, huge crack.
Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!
When I went to school that day,
I never said good-bye.
I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.
When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,
And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.
Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,
And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.
And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,
And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best
Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest
Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass
Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.
But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.
But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.
I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.
Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest
When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could
please listen to me if you would,
I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.
But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,
Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I had to cancel the date.
I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true
And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"
In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech Students Who Were Lost
Please if you would, Don't smash this on the ground.
If you pass this on,
Maybe people will cry,
Just keep this in your heart,
For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".
If you think male Harem should be a genre choice paste this on your profile and put your name at the end. Lady Arachne,
15 Things to do when you're in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look."
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!
15.Grap alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"
IN THE CINEMA: Wait for it to go quiet and then stand up loudly and yell "I can't find the remote to change the channel!"
Friend: Will bail me out of jail
Friend: Will comfort me when he breaks up with me
Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
Friend: Will help me learn to drive
Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away
Friend: Will help me up when I fall down
Friend: Will go to a concert with me
Friend: Will comfort me when he breaks my heart
Friend: Calls your parents by Mr. and Mrs.
Friend: Has never seen you cry
Friend: Never asks for anything to eat or drink
Friend: Asks you to write down your number.
Friend: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back
Friend: Only knows a few things about you
Friend: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
Friend: Will help you find your prince.
Friend: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
Friend: Will offer you a soda.
Friend: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.
Friend: Will give you their umbrella in the rain.
Friend: Will help you move.
Friend: Will console you when you house catches on fire.
Friend: Will ask why you're crying.
Friend: Will tell you she knows how you feel.
Friend: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
Friend: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
Friend: Will never ask for food.
Friend: Will knock on your front door.
Friend: Will say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.
Friend: Will say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.
Friend: Hides me from the cops
Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public
One of my best friends died recently; I'm really upset. He was such a great guy and I miss him. Maybe you knew of him. Most people did. I hope it wasn't you who contributed to his death, otherwise I shall dispatch a vicious band of lions to disembowel you. Okay, I don't have a troupe of lions at my disposal, but I can find one, trust me. My friend was a paragon of amazing. His name was Common Sense. I am sorry to inform you of his demise. Mourn with me.
Dearly beloved…we gather here to say our goodbyes. Here he lies…
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.
Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate and teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student; but, could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm a Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
Rest In Peace, my old friend.
Put this song on if you love Humor,Dark Side and have no sanity.
Dashing through the sand...
With a bomb strapped to my back...
I have a nasty plan...
For Christmas in Iraq!
I got through check point A
But not through check point B
That's when I got shot in the ass by the U.S Military!
If you are Harry Potter obsessed, copy this into you profile and add your name: Ga Nat Nat, Evil Older Sister, Frozenfan, Emerald Bear, Kyprioths Shadow, Faia Sakura, dan4eva, Lord Lugos, Dark Serpent Cat,Emo Doppelganger Alchemist, Lady Arachne
Reasons why girls are the best
1.We got off the Titanic first
2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.
4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.
7. Taxis stop for us.
8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).
11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.
15. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
16. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.
17. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.
18. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
19. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
20. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
21. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
22. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.
23. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
24. We'll never regret piercing our ears.
25. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
26. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark
If you rearrange the following words, you'll find that the same letters spell the given definition. Someone out there either has too much spare time, or is really good at Scrabble.
Dormitory: Dirty room
Astronomer: Moon starer
George Bush: He bugs Gore
The eyes: They see
Slot machine: Cash lost in me
Desperation: A rope ends it
Presbyterian: Best in prayer
Election results: Lies! Let's recount
Snooze alarm: Alas! no more z's
Eleven plus two: Twelve plus one
Mother in law: Woman Hitler
The Morse code: Here come dots
A decimal point: I'm a dot in place
98 percent of teens can walk without running into walls. If you're in the 2 percent that can't, post this in your profile.
Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic
Her only friend was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair
She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound
Until her parents unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure
A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?
But she grabs her bear
And softly cries
She loves her parents
But they want her to die
She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"Please God, why is
My life always sinking? "
Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did
Then one night
Her mom came home high
And the poor child was beaten
As hours went by
Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made
She thrust the blade
Right in her chest, "You deserve to die
You worthless pest!"
The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dieing
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying
Police showed up
At the small little house
Then quickly barged in
Everything quiet as a mouse
One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the little girl
Lying on the floor
It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms
Copy and paste this onto your profile if you have a heart.
If you believe in Jesus Christ, put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says, 'If you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.'
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