Guy: Where have you been all my life?
Girl: Hiding from you.

Guy: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Girl: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Guy: Is this seat empty?
Girl: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Guy: Your place or mine?
Girl: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Guy: So, what do you do for a living?
Girl: I'm a female impersonator.

Guy: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Girl: Do not enter.

Guy: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Girl: But would you stay there?

Guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Girl: Really? 'Cause I'd put f and u together.

Guy:Your eyes they're amazing.
Girl: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Guy: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Girl: It's in the phone book

Guy: But I don't know your name
Girl: That's in the phone book too

Guy: I know how to please a woman
Girl: Then please leave me alone

Guy: I can tell you want me
Girl: Ohhhh, your so right, I want you to leave

Guy: If you were a hamburger at McDonalds you would be McGorgeous
Girl: Would that be under your McLame Burger

Guy: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven
Girl: Not nearly as bad as when you fell on planet rejection

Guy: Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again
Girl: No, but sure...next time just be sure to keep walking

Guy: I want to give myself to you
Girl: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts

The Mark of Athena, the new book we all can't wait for.

Heroes of Olympus must reunite to stop Gaea.

Every body has a fatal flaw.

Perseus Jackson. Savior of Olympus.

Electricity. That's what will shock you if you mess with Thalia Grace.

Riptide. Percy's lethal ballpoint pen.

Clarisse. That's who will go after you if you beat her in a battle. (And you don't want an angry Clarisse. It's bad enough when she's not angry.)

Yellow duffle bags. Helped Percy, Tyson, and Annabeth.

Jason Grace. Thalia's "lost" little brother.

Annabeth Chase. Percy's girlfriend and official architect of Olympus. Who is also the Heroine of Olympus.

Chiron. Trainer of Heroes and the Greek demigods.

Kaleidoscope. What Piper's eyes look like to Jason.

Son of Neptune. The second book in the Hero's of Olympus Series

Olympus. Home of the gods.

Nemesis. Ethan's mother. Don't worry, she's not getting her revenge on his death.

Atlas. Zoe's father.

Never back down. The phrase that reminds me of TLO.

Dionysus. The god of wine. (More like the god of Diet Coke.)

Thalia Grace. Hunter of Artemis and daughter of Zeus.

Hephaestus. The father of Beckendorf and Leo.

Empathy link. What Grover and Percy have. Saved Grover's life a couple of times.

Officers. The immortal skeletons dressed up as officers.

Lupa. The she-wolf, trainer of the roman demigods

Morpheus. The gods of dreams. He put NYC asleep during TLO.

Persephone. The kidnapped wife of Hades. Believes every hero is brave and wants to give them a chance.

Illiterates. Many kids believe some of the demigods are illiterates.

Aphrodite. Promised Percy a hard love life.

Nothing lasts forever. Not Even the gods.

Switched. The leaders of the two camp, Percy and Jason are switched. Jason at CHB, Percy at Camp Jupiter

Percy: This is a PEN!

PJO PLEDGE:

I promise to remember Percy
whenever Im at sea
I promise to remember Annabeth
whenever a spider comes at me
I promise to protect nature
for Grover's sake of course
I promise to remember Luke
when my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Chiron
whenever I see a sign that says ''free pony ride''
I promise to remember Tyson
whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side
I promise to remember Thalia
whenever a friend is scared of heights
I promise to remember Clarisse
whenever I see someone that gives me a fright
I promise to remember Bianca
whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother
I promise to remember Nico
whenever I see someone who doesnt get along with others
I promise to remember Zoe
whenever I watch the stars
I promise to remembe Rachel
whenever a limo passes my car.
yes I promise to remember PJO
wherever I may go

You know you live in 2011 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played Solitaire with real cards for years.

3.) You're shocked when you hear that people CAN actually survive without cable.

4.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screen name or My Space.

6.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.

7.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

8.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

9.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

10.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

11.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

12.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

13.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

Here are some things that don't make sense, and some things that are just plain funny.

If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile!

The Stupidest Things On Products

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Too late!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (As night follows day . . .

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I got to admit, I'm curious

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.)

On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon

On a Myer hairdryer: “Do not use while sleeping."(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: “Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."(Wow. That's really helpful

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly".(Awh, that's the whole purpose of buying the costume!)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals". (Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?

On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions:” Put on fork and eat."(No! Really? We're supposed to eat food?!

On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."(And that would be how??)

On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."(But, it's just a suggestion

You are a...

CHILD OF ZEUS

You like being in charge.
You often wish you could just zap someone with a thunderbolt.
You were voted Class President.
You do what’s best for everyone.
You think you have what it takes to run for President.
You think every problem has a solution.
You love showing off.
You like plane rides
You are hydrophobiac

5/10

CHILD OF POSEIDON

You feel at home in the water.
Your favourite vacation place is at the beach.
You enjoy snorkelling, scuba diving, surfing, etc.
You want to do something about the marine species being abused today.
You visit the local pool on a regular basis.
You swim professionally.
You hate seafood.
You never get seasick.
You’d rather ride a boat than a plane.
You are acrophobiac

2/10

CHILD OF HADES

You’re not that much of a people person.
You like staying in the dark and writing.
You experience bad moods on a regular basis.
You like listening to loud, angry music.
You spend most of your time alone.
You think parties are sometimes loud and annoying.
You like to keep to yourself.
All your closets are padlocked (or you wish they could be)
You write in diary/journal/blog.
You feel most active at night.

8/10

CHILD OF DEMETER

You own a garden.
You like the great outdoors.
You have a green thumb.
You’re an environmentalist.
You have a special connection with animals.
You’re a vegetarian.
You like going hiking, camping, and looking at the natural wonders of the world.
You always check a product if it’s environmentally-friendly.
You love going to flower shops.
You think global warming is a threat that must be dealt with.

4/10

CHILD OF ARES

You often start fights.
You’re a very aggressive type of person.
You like watching wrestling.
You’re competitive.
You like reading about war.
You don’t take crap from anybody.
You have anger management.
You never back away from a fight.
Everyone does what you say.
You don’t always think before you do something.

2/10

CHILD OF ATHENA

You have an insatiable thirst for knowledge.
You’re probably the only person who visit the library on a regularbasis.
Half of your Christmas presents last year were books.
You like reading about war, mostly about the reasons and controversies behind it.
You’re the valedictorian in your class.
You’ve never gotten a grade below 80 in your report card.
You get political jokes without asking people to explain them.
You think it would be better if you were the President. (No way...if that happened the world would end up getting blown up...)
You have a huge shelf of books at home.
You think vinyl pocket protectors are useful

8/10

CHILD OF APOLLO

You’re very creative and artistic.
You like listening to all kinds of music in general.
You always feel sunny and optimistic.
You are talented at drawing.
You like writing poetry.
You can play at least 3 musical instruments.
You like going to art museums.
You almost always win 1st Place in Art Contests.
You have straight A's in Art on your report card.
Your school notebook has more doodles than notes.

8/10

HUNTER OF ARTEMIS

You dislike boys in general.
A deer is one of your favorite animals
You can shoot targets
You like silver.
You like the moon better than the sun
Zoe Nightshade is awesome
You love wild animals
You spend most of your time outdoors.
You love to move around the place
Hunting is not cruel, if it's to hunt down monsters

8/10

CHILD OF HEPHAESTUS

You have a way with tools.
You build awesome things during your free time.
You’re the best at Woodshop in your class.
Metalworking is your forte.
You have your own toolbox.
You often search the Internet to look for pictures of robots.
You’re a techie.
You often have carpentry projects.
You dream of being a carpenter.
You aren’t afraid of fire.

2/10

CHILD OF APHRODITE

Every guy/girl swoons for you.
You like putting on makeup.
You naturally smell good.
You never experience a bad hair day.
Your favorrite activity is clothes-shopping.
You’re always at the front of every trend.
You’re the popular girl/guy at your school.
You’re often invited to parties.
Your motto is ‘It’s never a party without me.”
You look at yourself in the mirror on a regular basis.

2/10

CHILD OF HERMES

You like pickpocketing your friends.
You’re a prankster.
You’re a speed demon.
You consider yourself restless.
You’re the best speaker in the class.
You like thinking on your feet and using your wits.
You’re inventive and resourceful.
You often start arguments.
You’ve never lost a debate.
You like making witty and sarcastic statements.

7/10

CHILD OF DIONYSUS

You’re the life of the party.
You like wine.
You’ve probably tasted every alcoholic drink out there.
You can finish a martini in less than a minute..
You have a happy, cheerful disposition.
You’re a foodie.
You like going to social events and mingling with people.
You like trying out new food.
You feel that you’re abundant in life.
You think that too much of anything is bad.

UPCOMING STORIES:

Starstruck: Percy id the hot teen sensation to everyone on the planet except.. Annabeth Chase. He will try everything to win her heart. But it's not just her heart he will change. But his as well. Release date:March 7th

ºø„ „øº„øº

ºø„ PERCY JACKSON „øº

„øº IS AWESOME!!! ºø„

„øº„øººø„ºø„

You say vampires, I say DEMIGODS!
You say Rob Pattinson, I say LOGAN LERMAN!
You say Bella and Edward, I say PERCY AND ANNABETH!
You say Team Edward, I say TEAM PERCY!
You say Bella, I say ANNABETH!
You say Jacob, I say NICO!
You say Jasper, I say LUKE!
You say Alice, I say THALIA!
You say Rosalie, I say SILENA!
You say the wolf pack, I say THE STOLLS!
You say Emmett, I say BECKENDORF!
You say Carlisle, I say CHIRON!
You say Esme, I say ZOE!
You say Forks, I say CAMP HALF-BLOOD! (NOT TO MENTION THE OTHER CAMP!)
You say Twilight, I say...PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BEAT THAT, TWILIGHT FANS!
PERCY JACKSON PWNZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE ADDICTED TO PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS WHEN...

I.) You have sudden crazy urges to jump into the sea and see if you can breathe underwater.
II.) You have a dream about Percy and Annabeth running around camp in swimming suits.
III.) You think that the Achilles' Curse is worth getting so that you'll be invulnerable for eternity.
IV.) Monster Chickens start attacking.
V.) Your favorite word becomes "antidisestablishmentarianism".
VI.) You watch YouTube videos featuring (kinda lame) The Sea of Monsters teaser trailers.
VII.) Artemis comes busting down your door so that:
A.) If you're a girl, she'll turn you into a jackolope.
B.) If you're a boy, she'll turn you into a jackolope.
VIII.) You attack random people with knives, hoping that they're actually monsters and you're a demigod who has slew a monster without proper training.
IX.) When the only thing you write about (well, if you're not writing an assignment) is either pure Percy Jackson and the Olympians, related to Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Percy Jackson and the Olympians is mentioned, or a crossover with Percy Jackson and the Olympians. Heroes of Olympus included.
X.) You pledge that the only things you'll write on FanFiction.Net will be in the Percy Jackson and the Olympians category or a crossover with Percy Jackson and the Olympians. Heroes of Olympus included.
XI.) When you start writing down Roman numerals at a furious rate. You know...in your math binder, so that if your math teacher finds out, you have an excuse because it's "math-related".
XII.) When you have drawn a pencil drawing of The Lost Hero's cover decently and have done it at least two times.
XIII.) If you're going crazy because you have a lot more time before The Son of Neptune comes out.
XIV.) If you have read The Lightning Thief over eight times.
XV.) If you have read The Sea of Monsters over eight times.
XVI.) If you have read The Titan's Curse over eight times.
XVII.) If you have read The Battle of the Labyrinth over eight times.
XVIII.) If you have read The Last Olympian over eight times.
XIX.) If you have read The Lost Hero over eight times.
XX.) If you have read The Son of Neptune's preview (both of them) over eight times. Oh, and if you have heard the third preview over eight times. YAY!
XXI.) If you like cheeseburgers.
XXII.) If you think that Riptide is one of the most awesome weapons in the world.
XXIII.) If you think Chiron should fall in love with a lady centaur. You know, it's about time...
XXIV.) When Camp Half-Blood and Camp Jupiter throws a huge, blowout party in the Big House.
XXV.) Mentally-distorted llamas attack with water balloons and Tutu the Owl. (See my Pet Failures of the Demigod Gang, although that's after Bubble the Goldfish...oh, well.)
XXVI.) When you customize your Gmail (if you have a Gmail) background to Percy Jackson themed.
XXVII.) You immediately start dancing the "Chicken Dance" when Lady Gaga comes on.
XXVIII.) You make your parents buy all the Percy Jackson and the Olympians and Heroes of Olympus books as soon as they come out.
XXIX.) You scream, "I DON'T WANNA READ CLASSICS! THEY'RE BORING!"
XXX.) You read every single Greek mythology book you can lay your hands on.
XXXI.) You read the whole Percy Jackson and the Olympians in less then four hours. The Lost Hero included.
XXXII.) You go on FanFiction.Net a lot so that you can work on your Percy Jackson and the Olympians fanfiction.
XXXIII.) You believe that Percabeth rocks like crazy!
XXXIV.) You know when Percy gets swallowed by a normal-sized pelican. Tee-hee.
XXXV.) Nico starts tending plants.
XXXVI.) You think that Jason and Piper should go together or Jason and Reyna. Nobody else.
XXXVII.) You think that Rick Riordan should make an epilogue like, ten years later...Percy and Annabeth are married and have children. They live happily ever after. The end.
XXXVIII.) Demeter comes down from Olympus and offers you 100% whole-grain cereal.
XXXIX.) Poseidon sends you flying horsies. Oh, not to mention stinging horseflies as well!
XL.) Zeus goes crazy and starts smooching Hera on the cheek.
XLI.) You wish that everything in your life was Percy Jackson and the Olympians related.
XLII.) You have posters of Percy Jackson and the Olympians plastered all over your bedroom.
XLIII.) You kill every plant you touch.
XLIV.) Hellhounds start licking you on the cheek.
XLV.) You receive either a Celestial Bronze sword or Imperial Gold javelin. Either is good!
XLVI.) You have an orange Camp Half-Blood tee.
XLVII.) You memorized every single thing there is to The Lightning Thief.
XLVIII.) You memorized every single thing there is to The Sea of Monsters.
XLIX.) You memorized every single thing there is to The Titan's Curse.
L.) You memorized every single thing there is to The Battle of the Labyrinth.
LI.) You memorized every single thing there is to The Last Olympian.
LII.) You memorized every single thing there is to The Lost Hero.
LIII.) You memorized every single thing there is to The Son of Neptune.
LIV.) You have an account of Camp Half-Blood Wiki and edit at least one hundred edits in a day.
LV.) You like the color blue.
LVI.) You have made a Percy Jackson and the Olympians JEOPARDY! on Microsoft PowerPoint.
LVII.) You know the color of Piper's eyes.
LVIII.) You know how many scales Festus has on his wings. (Careful. This one is tricky...ha, Festus doesn't have any scales on his wings!)
LIX.) You have gone to sleep away camp in a different state.
LX.) A big, flying lady boar comes and demolishes your house.
LXI.) You believe in the Greek and Roman gods.
LXII.) You wished that you had ADHD or dyslexia.
LXIII.) You have seen a satyr playing billiards with a centipede.
LXIV.) A centaur offers you a sandwich.
LXV.) You're there at the wedding when Juniper the tree nymph and Grover get married.
LXVI.) You know that Bob the Zit exists.
LXVII.) You think that Poseidon is awesomeness.
LXVIII.) You swing around tridents for fun and blast thunderbolts from your brain.
LXIX.) You love listening to classical music.
LXX.) You have been to Peru and know how vicious llamas actually are.
LXXI.) You are a non-believer in archaeology.
LXXII.) You think that Kronos being sucked into a black hole is ponage.
LXXIII.) A baby comes up to you and asks for a diaper along with The Lightning Thief. He won't destroy it.
LXXIV.) A baby satyr comes up to you and asks for a milk bottle with The Sea of Monsters.
LXXV.) A certain Medea comes up to you and asks for a dance with The Titan's Curse.
LXXVI.) Joe Bob the Cannibal Giant wears a tutu and asks for The Battle of the Labyrinth.
LXXVII.) Marrow Sucker drinks blood and starts waltzing with The Last Olympian. No, not Hestia, the book itself. It just proves that Laistrygonian giants are completely cuckoo in the head.
LXXVIII.) You are a suspect in a lineup because the police thinks that you swallowed Percy's shoes.
LXXIX.) You have edited your profile today and it has something to do with Percy Jackson and the Olympians.
LXXX.) You have recently drunk a bottle of Poland Spring water.
LXXXI.) Your mom is yelling at you because you have to practice piano now.
LXXXII.) You look down at a Twilight series book and throw it in the pond because you know that Percy Jackson and the Olympians is so much better then Twilight, Eclipse, New Moon, and Breaking Dawn.
LXXXIII.) Ares loses his fuzzy dice and goes on a temper tantrum. A.K.A., World War III starts

Friends/Best Friends

Friends: Will comfort you when he rejects you

Best Friends: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

Friends: Will be there for you when he breaks your heart

Best Friends: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

Friends: Will help you up when you fall

Best Friends: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, Dumb ass?"

Friends: Helps you find your prince

Best Friends: Kidnaps him and brings him to you

Friends: Will pass you a soda

Best Friends: Will dump theirs on you

Friends: Will help you learn to drive

Best Friends: Will help you roll the car into the lake so you can collect insurance

Friends: Will help you move

Best Friends: Will help you move the bodies

Friends: Will hide you from the cops

Best Friends: Are probably the reason they're after you in the first place

Friends: Never ask for anything to eat or drink

Best Friends: Are the reason you have no food (im that kind of bff but she puts up with me)

Friends: Will help you find your way when you're lost

Best Friends: Will be the one messing with your compass, stealing your map and giving you bad directions

Friends: Asks you to write down your number

Best Friends: Has you on speed dial

Friends: Borrows your stuff for a few days and then gives it back

Best Friends: Loses you stuff and says, "My bad...here's a tissue"

Friends: Only know a few things about you

Best Friends: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life...

Friends: Would knock on your front door

Best Friends: Would walk right in and say, "I'M HOME!"

Friends: You have to tell them not to tell anyone

Best Friends: Already know not to tell

Friends: Are only through school/college

Best Friends: Are for life

Friends: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough

Best Friend: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say, "Girl drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste"

Friends: Would ignore this

Best Friends: Will re-post this shit

Friends: comfort you when you fight with your boyfriend

Best Friends: go over to his house and kick his ass

Friends: bail you outta jail

Best Friends: sit next to you singing the jail song

Friends: tell you to forget it when you say you want to vandalize a guy's house

Best Friends: are the ones getting fined by the police with you

Friends: Think your insane for jumping off a roof onto a trampoline

Best Friends: Are jumping right after you

Friends: come over every couple of months for a sleepover

Best Friends: are your weekend boarders

Friends: are offended when you make fun of them

Best Friends: kick your ass and all's forgiven

Friends: are shy around your boyfriend

Best Friends: will tease him till he blushes redder than a fire engine

Friends: don't see you if you're sick

Best Friends: are why you're sitting in bed under a blanket with a thermometer, book, and your phone

Friends: dare you to scream into the street

Best Friends: dare you to go streaking

Friends: call you retarded for running threw bleachers yelling "IT'S PICKLE TIME!"

Best Friends: are screaming and running with you

Friends: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

Best Friends: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

Friends: Bring you a tissue to dry your tears.

Best Friends: Have a shovel ready to bury the asshole who did this to you.

Friends: Help you with your addiction to crack.

Best Friends: Are the one's that sold it to you.

Friends: never ask anything to eat or drink

Best Friends: Help themselves and is the reason you never have any food

Friends:Call your parents M. Mrs and grandma and grandpa

Best Friends: Call your parents MOM and DAD GRAMS AND GRANDPA

Friends: Would bail you out of jail

Best Friends: Would be sitting next to you saying DAMN we screwed up

Friends: Never seen you cry

Best Friends: Wont tell anyone else you cry... just laugh about it when your not down anymore

Friends: gives you their umbrella in the rain

Best Friends: takes yours and says, "RUN, -BEEP- RUN!"

Friends: will bail you out of jail

Best Friends: would be in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS AWESOME, LETS DO IT AGAIN!!"

Friends: Will leave you behind if thats what everyone else is doing

Best Friends: Will kick the whole crowd asses that left you

Friends: have to tell them not to tell

Best Friends: Already know not to tell

Friends: Are through high school /college (drinking buddies)

Best Friends: Are for life

Friends: Would ignore this

Best Friends: Will re-post this shit

YOU KNOW YOU'RE OBSESSED WITH PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS WHEN:

1.You buy everything you see with an owl or trident on it.

2.You yell “Burrito Fight!” whenever you’re in a Mexican restaurant.

3.You checked to make sure your vice-principal doesn’t have a tail.

4.You know which pages the good parts are on.

5.You suddenly hate thunderstorms.

6.You start hearing Percabeth in every song you hear.

7.You started calling your dog Mrs. O’Leary.

8.You start figuring out who your godly parent is.

9.You never looked at a ballpoint pen the same way again.

10.You have a plan to get out of school early on May 5th so you can buy The Last Olympian, read it, and still have time to do your homework.

11.You ask the cashier at the store if they stock Mythomagic cards.

12.You start doing pro/con lists in your head. During Math. When you’re supposed to be taking notes.

13.You start spelling character names out of your spelling words.

14.You start loving blue plastic hairbrushes and anyone who wields them.

15.Each day you check every fan site you know of for new information.

16.You try to figure out how much food dye you need to turn chocolate chip cookies blue.

17.You make references to it in school reports and/or to friends that haven’t read it.

18.The first thing you ask someone when you meet them is, “Have you read PJO?”

19.On your trip to Washington D.C. you thought of Annabeth every time you saw a monument.

20.You yell “Mizzenmast!” whenever you enter a boat.

21.You dream about PJO every night.

22.You curse a god/goddess a lot.

23.You have one (Or more) pictures relating to PJO in your room

24.You know PJO better then most sane people

25.You have links to every great PJO site

26.You add things to the list every day

27.You know what you would do if you were Percy

28.You argue with your friends about if Nico should turn evil or not (NO! Nico don't turn evil!!)

29.At least half of your friends have read all the PJO, or are going to in the very near future

30.You wish you could find a rainbow to see if Iris messages work

31.For April Fools, you put a piece of paper over a card/cards and told your friends that they were Myth-O-Magic cards and they understood

32.Your friends all have a godly parent, and so do you, and your family, and your extended family, and your far, far, far away cuzs'

33.You are trying to learn Greek

34.You keep thinking about one of the PJO books when you go on a trip.

35.Every language you know is some form of Ancient greek.

36.You shriek everytime you see a guy with black hair and green eyes

37.You have an instant crush on Nico!

38.You just have to research more about greek mythology

39.You call up the Camp Half Blood number in LT.

40.You want to learn Latin

42.You copy/paste this onto your profile

43.About 75-100 of your fics are PJO related, even if it is a cross over

44.You have taken every test you can find about what demigodly parent you would/do/should have, and your friends have as well or are going to

45.You make sure all of your friends (Or most of them), have an idea about what you say when talking about PJO

46.Your friends (At least one), think you are obbsessed with PJO, and you agree

47.A friend (or more), think you should start taking pills and/or going to a mental doctor, because you are so obsessed

48.You have one or more things related to PJO on your school stuff, and if someone asks you why, you tell them

49.You have something on your school things (Or home things), that says 'Daughter (Or son if you're a guy) of God/goddess', and you don't even try to hide it, even if it says daughter of Name of unliked god.goddess

50.You’re nodding and smiling when you read this

51.You were so busy reading that you missed number 41

52.You are planning on adding a lot more things to this list

53.You have done at least 15 (Or more) of the above things

54.You are so obessed with PJO and the couple Percy-Annabeth, that you are proud to call yourselves supporters of Percabeth!!!

55. You try to convince your friends to read PJO ( Lol, i do that all the time...)

Know You’re Obsessed With Percy Jackson When…

-You go to the Empire State Building and you ask for the 600th Floor.

-There’s a thunderstorm going on and you scream, “CALM DOWN, ZEUS!”

-Every time you use the Internet, you thank Hermes.

-When you see Harry Potter, you think of Percy with glasses.

-You burn food to see if it smells good.

-You see an owl, you go, “Hi Athena!”

-Everyone else is creating a Twilightfamily and you create a PJO family.

-You go on a cruise and you hope the boat isn’t The Princess Andromeda…

-You sometimes try to control water.

-You don't read anything but PJO for 3 months.

-You've gone to Google maps and looked up Camp Half-Blood’s address.

-Even though notdiagnosed, you claim you have ADHD or dyslexia and blame it on your God parent.

-You yell "Annabeth!" everytime you see a NY Yankees hat.

-You make the PJO characters on Sims, as Miis on the Wii, and other video games.

-Anytime you see an orange shirt, you look at the front of it to see if it is a Camp shirt.

-You are a PJO character for Halloween.

-Recite lines randomly from the books.

-When you see/hear about anything myhtology-related, you talk about how it was in PJO (what page, book, etc.) and what happened to it.(all the time!)

-Buy anything New York or San Francisco-related.

-You are suddenly obsessed with Adidas shoes because they have the Hermes symbol.

-You claim that Percy IS real and lives in New York no matter how much your friends argue with you.

-You have dreams about PJO characters/events

-You carry a ballpoint pen in your pocket.

-That everytime you pick up a pen, you think it'll turn into a sword.

-In the beginning of your first History class, you burst out "Will we be studying Greek mythology?!"

-You pretend (or actually) faint when someone asks "Who's Percy?"

-When someone mentions the name Percy (like Percy Weasley) you scream "JACKSON!"

-You are known to scream names of the characters at random times.

-You've got any copy of any book in all your backpacks/binders incase of emergencies

-And when you flunk said test, you blame her irritation on Percabeth.

You say vampires, I say DEMIGODS!

You say Rob Pattinson, I say LOGAN LERMAN!

You say Bella and Edward, I say PERCY AND ANNABETH

You say Team Edward, I say TEAM PERCY!

You say Bella, I say ANNABETH!

You say Jacob, I say NICO!

You say Jasper, I say LUKE!

You say Alice, I say THALIA!

You say Rosalie, I say SILENA!

You say the wolf pack, I say THE STOLLS!

You say Emmett, I say BECKENDORF!

You say Carlisle, I say CHIRON!

You say Esme, I say ZOE!

You say Forks, I say CAMP HALF-BLOOD!

You say Twilight, I say...PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS BABY!!!!!!!

BEAT THAT TWILIGHT FANS!

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

If you can keep your head while other people are losing theirs, you probably don't fully understand the situation.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.

I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.

I will temporarily rule the world, forever.

Lottery: a tax on people who don’t understand statistics.

If I could get a firm grip on reality, I'd choke it.

Chaos, panic, and disorder. My work here is done.

The problem with reality is a lack of background music.

I laugh in the face of death...maybe not laugh more like a snicker...a quiet snicker, and I wouldn't do it directly in death's face so, it's more like a quiet snicker behind death's back.

I know at least three people who would love to push me down the stairs.

Crashing through the snow on an automation horse draw sleigh,

Over the shields we go, Kronos' minions exploding away,

Bells on Blackjack's wing, Riptide shining bright,

What fun it is to slash and swing our clubs and swords tonight,

Oh! Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Percy's on his way,

Fighting lots of monsters as he comes to save the day, Hey!

Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Mrs. O' Leary's come to play,

Chewing the heads off monsters as she comes to Percy's aid,

A dream or two ago, I saw a rising tide,

a horse and eagle fight,

a thunder bolt by my side,

the eagle got hit and sank,

some time the horse had bought,

Poseidon's face turned blank,

as he foiled Zeus' plot,

Oh! Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Percy's on his way,

fighting lots of monsters as he comes to save the day, Hey!

Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Mrs. O' Leary's come to play,

Chewing the heads off monsters as she comes to Percy's aid, Yay!

Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Percy's on his way,

fighting lots of monsters as he comes to save the day, Hey!

Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Mrs. O' Leary's come to play,

Chewing the heads off monsters as she comes to Percy's aid.

Ten Things I Do When I'm Bored:

Read

Write Stories

Day Dream

Practice Archery

Improving Hand-Eye Coordination

Run

Go Swimming

Hang Out With Friends

Draw Random Pictures

What I Hate:

Waiting in Line

Admitting Defeat

People Telling Me What To Do

People Helping Me

Falling Asleep During Class

What I Like:

Making Someone Proud

Walking On The Beach

Time To Myself

Staying Up Late At Night

Being With My Friends

Favorite Places:

The Beach

The Garden Of The Gods

Washington D.C.

Greece

Least Favorite Places:

School (Enough said)

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Percy Jackson, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, ihatejacob1, Blondejoke101 MyBFCanSparkle, Rockyrocks919 xXxDaughterofAthenaxXx, daughterofhades5565,darkangelxx22xx,Thalia101,Aguilita Cruz, Daughter of Poseidon 1217

"People often ignore the simple things in life. If someone really annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown. On the other hand, it only takes 4 muscles to reach over and bitch slap that mother fucker upside the head!!!!"

If Fanfiction is your way of escaping reality and the rest of the boring people in the world and truly "unleashing your imagination" then paste this in your profile and add your name: Emerald Princess 14, StardustFromThePlanetGallifrey, NarnianLady, KingdomHeartsNerd, Lady Alice101, TheOnlyMarauderette, GodofAWSOMEstuff, Katerina Riley, Aguilita Cruz,Daughter of Poseidon 1217,
Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!
Everyone is entitled to being stupid, but you just abuse the privilege.
I would say "screw you" but I think too many people already have.
If FanFiction to you is what Facebook is to other people, copy this into your profile.
Don't follow in my footsteps. I run into walls.
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"
Officer, I Swear To Drunk, I'm Not God!
There's Nothing Wrong With Arguing With Yourself. Its When You Argue With Yourself And LOSE When Its Weird
You Know Its Gonna Be A Bad Day When You Fall Out Of Bed And Miss The Floor
I've Got ADD And Magic Markers. Oh The Fun I Will Have!( I swear, I really do!)
I'm Not Paranoid... WHICH OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS?!
The Surest Sign Of Intelligent Life Out There Is That None Of Them Has Ever Tried To Contact Us
Why Is It Necessary To Nail Down The Lid Of A Coffin?

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy and paste this into your profile
Justin Bieber falls off a building. 90% of the girls are crying. 9% are watching while eating popcorn. 1% are pushing Justin off the building. If you are part of that 9 or 1%, copy and paste this into your profile. (I'm Part of the 1%)
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.
If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile
If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever wondered who made up all the 'copy this into your profile' thingies then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you:

love to read and act crazy,
laugh and have fun,
ignore people who call you names or think you are less than them,
are always there to help your friend in their greatest time of need,
run bare foot through the grass just for the joy of the sea of cold green that tickles your feet,
spend as much time outside as you do reading or on the computer,
are a night owl who hardly sleeps,
act weird and crazy just to scare other people or make them laugh with you,
then we would be great friends. :D Copy and paste this in your profile if this is you.

FOR ALL OF THOSE OUT THERE THAT HAVE A 'DISORDER' OR HAS BEEN LABELED IN ANY WAY-

You don't have a conduct disorder, you're a revolutionary

You don't have a personality disorder, you're a philosopher

You aren't bipolar, you're an artist

You don't have an attachment disorder, you're a healer

You're not ADD, you're an inventor

You don't have a general anxiety disorder, you're an activist

You don't have an oppositional defiant disorder, you're a leader

You don't have a social anxiety disorder, you're a humanitarian

You're not ADHD, you're a KID!!!

Copy and paste if you hate being labeled and having people say things about your mind just to get money. Copy and paste if you want to be who you are and add your name to this ongoing list: Girl on Fire 75, Aguilita Cruz

Annabeth: Do I ever cross your mind?
Percy: No
Annabeth: Do you like me?
Percy: No
Annabeth: Do you want me?
Percy: No
Annabeth:Would you cry if I left?
Percy: No
Annabeth: Would you live for me?
Percy: No
Annabeth:Would you do anything for me?
Percy: No
Annabeth: Choose--me or your life
Percy: My life
Annabeth runs away in shock and pain and Percy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life

I'm the kind of girl who will burst out laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.

My best friends are the kind that if my house were on fire, they'd be roasting marsh mellows and flirting with the firemen.

THINGS YOU NEVER WANT TO HEAR WHILE UNDERGOING SURGERY:

1. "Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy."

2. "Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop."

3. "Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"

4. "Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!"

5. "Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?"

6. "Hand me that...uh...that uh...thingy."

7. "Oh no! I just lost my Rolex."

8. "Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?"

9. "Damn, there go the lights again..."

10. "Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of them."

11. "What do you mean you want a divorce?"

12. "Ooooops!"

You Know You’re Obsessed With Percy Jackson When…

You go to the Empire State Building and you ask for the 600th Floor.
There’s a thunderstorm going on and you scream, “CALM DOWN, ZEUS!”
Every time you use the Internet, you thank Hermes.
When you see Harry Potter, you think of Percy with glasses.
You burn food to see if it smells good.
You see an owl, you go, “Hi Athena!”
You’re in a running/swimming race and you’re praying and sacrificing to Hermes/Poseidon.
You think that your favorite singer is a child of Apollo.
Someone close to you dies and you give them money (LOTS of it) just in case…
Everyone else is creating a Twilight family and you create a PJO family.
You go on a cruise and you hope the boat isn’t The Princess Andromeda…
You’re on a boat and you pray that Poseidon is in a good mood.
You’re in the air (hang-gliding, cliff-diving, bungee jumping, flying, in a plane, etc.) and you hope Zeus is in a good mood and won’t blast you out of the air.
You go to Aunty Em’s and say you’re camera shy.
You find your true love and thank Aphrodite for sending him/her to you.
You think George Bush is a son of Ares (he’s dumb and violent you know!).
You know eventually, you will meet Percy.
Bring a blue plastic hairbrush with you everywhere.
When it gets really cold randomly, blame Kronos.
You get a Greek mythology calendar for Christmas.
You get really mad at Hades when a family member dies.
You sometimes try to control water.
You don't read anything but PJO for 3 months.
You've gone to Google maps and looked up Camp Half-Blood’s address.
Even though not diagnosed, you claim you have ADHD or dyslexia and blame it
on your God parent.
You yell "Annabeth!" everytime you see a NY Yankees hat.
You make the PJO characters on Sims, as Miis on the Wii, and other video
games.
Anytime you see an orange shirt, you look at the front of it to see if it is
a Camp shirt.
You are a PJO character for Halloween.
Recite lines randomly from the books.
When you see/hear about anything myhtology-related, you talk about how it
was in PJO (what page, book, etc.) and what happened to it.
Buy anything New York or San Francisco-related.
You are going to the Camp Half-Blood in Texas (I'm not).
You are suddenly obsessed with Adidas shoes because they have the Hermes
symbol.
You claim that Percy IS real and lives in New York no matter how much your friends argue with you.
You have dreams about PJO characters/events
You carry a ballpoint pen in your pocket.
That everytime you pick up a pen, you think it'll turn into a sword.
Everytime you play dodgeball, you worry about the strangley huge guys
You go to San Fransisco looking for the Old Sea Man.
You find yourself praying to Poseidon for rain.
Whenever your internet slows down, you yell at the sky and say "HERMES! WHY
DO YOU LOVE ANNOYING ME?!"
You stuff your (ahem) Harry Potter books in the back of your closet so you
have some more places for your PJ&O stuff.
When someone gets married, you say: "I hope you shall not anger Hera"
In the beginning of your first History class, you burst out "Will we be
studying Greek mythology?!"
You pretend (or actually) faint when someone asks "Who's Percy?"
When someone mentions the name Percy (like Percy Weasley) you scream
"JACKSON!"
When someone dies, you pray to Hades to allow them to go across Styx for
free, because they don't have drachmas anymore.
You are known to scream names of the characters at random times.
You've got any copy of any book in all your backpacks/binders incase of
emergencies
You pray to Athena when you don’t study for a math test.
And when you flunk said test, you blame her irritation on Percabeth.
When you steal your friend's pen you believe it's justified because your dad is the god of thieves, and you thought it was Riptide and had to check to make sure Percy was still alive.
You write PJO fanfiction constantly, even when you're not at your computer.
When your mom grounds you from the computer, you blame it on a combination of Nemesis, Hera and Hermes' little joke.
You want Hephaestus to fix your iPod when it breaks.
You give all your siblings god parents (Poseidon, Zeus, Hades.)
You call the "Ares kids", or school bullies, Martians.
You quiz fellow fans on the minor gods and win.
You spend time doing pointless research at , just because Rick Riordan linked it on his site.
You think Harry Potter can suck Percy's balls.
You hate all romans.
You imagine the gods alone, and what they really do on the Superbowl.
You think Percy's extended family needs therapy.
You want Kronos buried under Witchita, Kansas in a safe deposit toothpick box. No one will ever look there, and hopefully he'll be too tiny to bother the locals.
Your mother thinks you need to get a girlfriend, as does your father to cure your obsession.
You blame your little brother's desire to turn off your Internet in the middle of this review on Hermes' anger that you've joked about all of them.
You imagine random unwritten PJO moments during class and laugh. When one brave soul unaware of your obsession broaches the question of why you were laughing, you try to explain.
They think you are nuts because you are laughing at Hades' wild card of Nico.
You think of creative names for Percy besides Seaweed Brain, such as kelphead16 because his head is full of kelp and there's an 85 chance he'll die at the age of sixteen.
You wonder if you'll be able to drive a car come your 16, provided Percy saves the world, because of that.
You know you're obsessed when you lose something, and say, "Come on Hermes!
Give it back!!
You think all the popular girls at your school are children of Aphrodite. And say to all the braniacs at your school if Athena is okay. (Don’t hurt me Athena).
You go on YouTube and look at PJO themes for characters.
You read page 287 of BotL over and over again or say the lines in your head (this is for Nico-obsessed people. I am not one of
them!)
Your internet homepage is Rick Riordan's blog.
You and your other PJO obsessed friend cracks up if any one mentions the word
Canada or Canadians.
You and your PJO obsessed friend start a fan club with only you two in it.
You get other people obsessed.
You have constant vivid dreams about the fifth book.
You spend most of your time thinking what will happen in the next book.
You jump up and down at the idea of LT becoming another & completely better movie.
You know exactly what someone means when they say LT, SoM, TC, BotL, PJO and
use it in conversations.
Your favorite quote of all time comes from PJO.
You and your friend has "diss-wars" using PJO CHARACTERS
When someone dies, you give them a sack of red rubber balls for Cerberus. o
Every time you see a guy in a wheelchair you think "Chiron!!”
You find yourself saying things like "Oh my gods!" and "What the Hades?"
When your girlfriend dumps you and pray to Zeus to kill her (not that I
have any experience.)
When you burn yourself, you curse Hephaestus/Hestia.
You put an offering to Demeter next to your garden.
You go up to a teacher in a wheelchair and say, "I know who you really are, Chiron…"
You say "Maia!" when you are wearing shoes.
You checked to make sure your principal doesn’t have a tail.
You know which pages the good parts are on.
You suddenly hate thunderstorms.
You start hearing Percabeth in every song you hear.
You started calling your dog Mrs. O’Leary.
You start figuring out who your godly parent is.
You never looked at a ballpoint pen the same way again.
You ask the cashier at the store if they stock Mythomagic cards.
You start doing pro/con lists in your head. During Math. When you’re supposed to be taking notes.
Each day you check every fan site you know of for new information.
You try to figure out how much food dye you need to turn chocolate chip cookies blue.
You make references to it in school reports and/or to friends that haven’t read it.
The first thing you ask someone when you meet them is, “Have you read PJO?”
You think your math teacher is a evil monster.
You curse a god/goddess a lot. (I say, "Oh my Gods" and "What in Hades name are you doing?" and "What in Hades name am I doing" a lot)
You have at least one (Or more) pictures relating to PJO in your room
You know PJO better then most sane people
You have links to every great PJO site
You add things to the list every day
You know what you would do if you were Percy
You argue with your friends about if Nico should turn evil or not(Absaloutly NOT!)
At least half of your friends have read all the PJO, or are going to in the very near future
You wish you could find a rainbow to see if Iris messages work(although i dont have a golden drachama)
You give friends and youself a godly parent,
You are trying to learn Greek
You keep thinking about one of the PJO books when you go on a trip.
You think of percy every time you see a dark haried green-eyed boy
You have an instant crush on Nico(girls)/Thalia(guys)!!
You just have to research more about greek mythology
You want to learn Latin
You copy/paste this onto your profile
Most of your fics are PJO related, even if it is a cross over, if not all
You have taken every test you can find about what demigodly parent you would/do/should have, and your trying to get your friends to
You make sure all of your friends (Or most of them), have an idea about what you say when talking about PJO
Your friends (At least one), think you are obbsessed with PJO, and you agree
You have one or more things related to PJO on your school stuff, and if someone asks you why, you tell them
You try to find camp half blood.
You’re nodding and smiling when you read this
You own every single book
You have total nervous breakdowns when you have just finished the last book and cannot wait until fall for the next
You are planning on adding a lot more things to this list
You call yourself a demigod
You wish with every fibre of your being that the first page of The Lightning Theif told the truth, and the PJO series is real
You find yourself praying to a random god when you didn't study for a math test because you were too busy reading PJO
You've called someone you know a satyr
Yuo plan to name your children after the PJO characters

Girl: just so you know i am extremely mad at you
boy: well just so you know...
i like your face.
love your eyes.
and when you laugh i get butterflies.
girl: still angry.
boy: still in love

"Don't worry, I'm so over him. I honestly don't ca--"
he walks by
"Oh my gosh, he's gorgeous..."

I didnt fall for him...
my best friend pushed me

When you find a real man...
Ask him if he has a SINGLE brother!

Him: What time should i ask to be home?
Her: Never.
Him: Deal. . . think mom'll go for it?
Her: If not, i'll kidnap you.
Him: Its not kidnapping if i go willingly
Her:...pretend to fight me then!

Trying love a second time is like eating a hamburger, throwing it up, and then eating it again. (Hmmmmm . . . who tried that?)

Girl: your amazing
Boy: why's that?
Girl: because your the only thing that keeps me sane
Boy: really because your the only thing that drives me crazy

Boy: who do you like
girl: some guy that doesnt like me
boy: well then he is missing out
girl: who do you like?
Boy: some girl who likes some guy whos missing out

Guys are horrible creatures
They break our hearts
And never bother to mend it
But yet we love them so

Love is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it but only you can feel it's true warmth.

Ohh my, you clearly are oblivious to the fact that your eyes do so much damage.

I love him,
oh yes
i
do..
He's for
me
and not for
you
so if by chance
you
take
my place...
i'll take
my
fist and smash
your
face

Love is a stalker, it just never leaves you alone.

I was sad when i found out that you were taken...
but then i saw her and laughed cause she was UGLY!!

They say kissing is the language of love. Care to indulge in a little convo?

Men make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.

I didn't fall for you... You tripped me.

We have a communication problem and I don't wanna talk about it.

Its hard to pretend you love someone when you dont but its even harder to pretend you dont love someone when you really do

I just want one guy to come up and say to me "sorry my whole entire gender sucks" ( that would be hilarious if someone did that! )

He broke my heart...So I broke his JAW!!

I wish they sold hearts at walmart. I would buy them in bulk so when one gets broken I can shug it off and say it's ok I got more... then I would never feel this pain again. (Cheesy, yes. True? Yes.)

"Guys are like babies, you never really know exactly what they want, but we can make a pretty good guess."

Pass the liquor.. the boy is still ugly!

he Said "i love you" and i sneezed and said "ohh sorry;; But im Alergic to :.B.u.l.l.s.h.i.t.

Every time i walk pass you my words jummble into something stupid ...so i come out with somthing like...i like your phone...it's very small..(ackward silence)

I have skittles in my mouth... wanna taste the rainbow?

Virginity is like a bubble, one tiny prick and it's gone.

.heres to the guys that have us.the losers that lost us.& the lucky b-astards that will meet us.

Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes.
There's too much fraternizing with the enemy.

Boys are like trees, they take 50 years to grow up.

GUY: you look familiar
GIRL:really?
GUY:yeah but idk where i saw you
GIRL:oh you probably just looked up beautiful in the dictionary

If nothing lasts forever, can i be your nothing?

Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.

Men are like roses, you got to watch out for all the pricks.

When life gives you lemons trade them for guys.

Friends aren't suppose to be jealous
when you meet a new guy;
they're suppose to ask if they have a
brother!

A secret admirier is only a stalker with stationary.

Girls don't make mistakes, we date them.

The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else.

Don't be suprised if a fat guy in a red suit stuffs u in a bag in the middle of the niight because i asked for you for christmas

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST be WEAK.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a FEMALE, so I MUST not SWEAR.
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist.
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake.
I DON"T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border. (well...)

A Hunger Games Addict’s Prayer
I promise to remember Rue
When mockingbirds’ songs wake me
I’ll think of Foxface every time
I eat a strange new berry

If my little sister pets a goat
I promise to think of Prim
And if my best friend acts depressed
Then Gale; I’ll think of him

When I toss some wood in the fire
I’ll think of Katniss every time
And I’ll always think of Peeta
When my birthday cake’s sublime

The Capitol will cross my mind
When someone is unfair
I’ll be sure to think of Clove
Each time I pretend to care

I’ll always think of Glimmer
If someone’s pretty, but a dunce
And Thresh will occupy my mind
If I spare someone, something... Once

Whenever I watch a reality show
I will think of the Hunger Games
I’ll sure imagine Haymitch
If someone calls me names

I swear to think of Cato
When I’m homicidally inclined
I’ll make sure I think of Effie
When there’s nothing on my mind

I swear to remember the Hunger Games
And Catching Fire too
It’s important to think of the characters
They’re NOT mine (So, Collins, don’t sue!)

A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.

Kids Are Quick

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

TEACHER: Glen, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLEN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLEN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher.

Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely, Google

Dear 6,
Please stop spreading rumors about me eating 9. You shouldn't be talking. I hear you guys do some pretty nasty things.
Sincerely, 7

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely, Unicorns

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely, Canada

Dear Impossible,
Screw you. I just made a campfire underwater.
Sincerely,
Spongebob

Remember in third grade when the teachers said we need to learn cursive because we're going to use it for the rest of our lives? Haha they lied

God created men first because you always make a rough draft before a masterpiece.

FANFICTION: MY ANTI-DRUG. because, who has time for drugs if you're reading and plotting and writing and checking reviews? If this is true for you, copy and paste this to your profile.

Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing".

Man: "So, want to go back to my place?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not enter"

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

NORMAL PEOPLE AND PJO FANS

NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast
PJO FANS:will tell Zeus to make it rain

NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG!
PJO FANS: say OH MY GODS!

NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings
PJO FANS:won't go to one because they will take away their awesome demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or i'll tell on you!
PJO FANS: say shut up or my godly parent will vaporize you!

NORMAL PEOPLE: think that PJO fans are stupid
PJO FANS: know that normal people are stupid

NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!
PJO FANS: when being chased use their awesome demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms
PJO FANS: yell at Zeus to calm down

NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation
PJO FANS: would try and find Camp Half Blood

NORMAL PEOPLE:don't have this on their profile
PJO FANS: MUST have this on their profile

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. (my favorite)My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to stay that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

"Dear math I don't want to solve your problems I have my own to solve."

"Some people need a high five... in the face... with a chair."

"It's a beautiful day, now watch some idiot screw it up."

"Algebra I'm not going to find your X she's not coming back!"

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, "THAT WAS FRICKING AWESOME!"

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.