More specifically, three Red Dwarf and one Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Ah, old chum-burger! So nice of you to drop by! My name is Jess... Well, obviously it's Jessica * (the asterisk relating to my surname) but I'm not going to tell you that.

I am now finally thirteen! As some of you may know, I established this account when I was twelve, and Curry, Roast Beef and Smegging Ice-cream, Welcome to Red Dwarf, That's the Answer but what the Zark is the Question? and Would Anybody Like Some Toast? were all written in that lapse of life.

Anway, this is probably the fifth time that I have changed this profile, but I can assure you, you'll like this one and so will I...

Now...

I've made up my mind. It is official. I am no longer a Potterhead. Why? Because every time I think about it, I feel sick, that's why. I do still collect, and I do still like the video-games and the wonderful music that comes with them, but I think the main factor is that I've juiced the orange. There is no longer any more that I could possibly squeeze out of it.

Another thing is probably down to Red Dwarf taking over my life. I put the two in comparison, and Harry Potter just seems a stupid thing to put next to it, so I drop the thought. (I also hope that none of my obsessives from my HP YouTube channel stalks me and finds what I'm writing here. I want to keep that thing going.)

I became a Red Dwarf fan when I was 'round about seven; I can't actually remember, but I know for a fact I was living in Leeds at the time, and it was a while after I became a Dwarfer that we moved to Lincolnshire (at nine years). The very first episode I watched was either Parallel Universe or Better Than Life. I think it was Parallel Universe because I remember staring mesmerized at the Tongue Tied dance scene. But then again, I also remember distinctly the big wooden doors leading into the BTL dimension.

All I know for definite, it was most certainly an episode from series 2.

For a few years, it was kept in my mind as a programme I liked. Whenever it was on, I always asked Dad if I could watch it, and it always seemed to be from the first two series! Then it kicked in.

Dave was doing one of their occasional Dwarf marathons, and I watched it all the way through as best as I could. My mind was being taken over, and that's when it became an official obsession of mine.

I've been the same ever since, but people still don't seem to realize that it is the all-time hands-down favourite thing of mine. They still seem to think it is Harry Potter! I do not like this, so I'm trying my best to make it absolutely clear, even if most of them don't have an iota as to what Red Dwarf is.

Anyhoo, enough of that blabble! I want to make it totally clear that I have Asperger's Syndrome. Please, I cannot be bothered to explain it, so go and look it up and everything will become clear about me. There are other things in my life, such as my OCD which I absolutely hate (extreme hand-washing especially at home, unwanted and distressing thoughts, and horrendous rituals), but I won't go into detail.

Well, I also love the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy; the books, the radio-show, the TV show, the game and even the movie. I just love it all. It is one of my obsessions, but is nowhere near as intense as Red Dwarf, which I think about all the time. I believe I became a fan of that at around the age of six after watching the film, and then getting out the audio books. I do own all the books in physical copy now of course, and soon realized everything to do with them is nothing like the film, but I suppose that's a good thing. And yes, I do support Towel Day!

My musical tastes are extremely different from that of my peers. I love Duran Duran, Dire Straits, Fleetwood Mac, Roxy Music, David Bowie, Guns 'n Roses, and Def Leppard. Again, nobody my age has really heard of these musicians.

I'm getting a little tired now, but I would just like to clarify a few things before I finish.

Firstly, I have a strange crazy thing about Rimmer. It is a mixture of things I suppose; character, just being a hologram alone, how easy it is to laugh at him, uhh - even attractiveness. He is also freakishly similar to myself, which is - well - freaky. I know he's only an imaginary character, but he's smegging cool (and you cannot deny!).

Secondly, I would just like to say that I have indeed read all of the Red Dwarf books, and I do actually own them also (as well as some other additional books). Plus, I do collect RD merchandise.

I don't know why I wanted to say that, however I always feel happy when I do.

Anything else? I don't know. Watch this space either way, because you never know, I might actually do one of those updatey things!

Toodlepipsky then!

RimmerDuranPotter