| Tobias Umbra |
Author has written 6 stories for Batman, and Star Fox. I'm back to writing fanfiction, mainly this StarFox storyline that I just need to get down. So please, take a look at what I wrote, or go to my Myspace/Facebook page if you wanna read some of my original stuff. Enjoy! Stereotype Copy and Paste? I have SerpentPanda to thank for this, because this actually is sort of funny. At any rate, bold the ones that apply to you. I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists. I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun. I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz. I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed. I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat. I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy. I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS. I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape. I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist. I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch. I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat. I'm ATHEIST so i MUST hate the world. I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals. I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people. I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible. I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay. I'm (a Philly kid now, but born and raised) SOUTHERN so I MUST be white trash. I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy. I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants. (This may be true) I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem. I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store. I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage. I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore... I'm a DANCER, So I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore. I wear SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut. I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs. I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob. I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo. I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend. I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars. I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy. I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore. I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut. (Psyche! Just kidding) I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals. I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big DICK. I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!! I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin. I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life. I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I'm (marginally) INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual. I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist. What do you put if you have an unexplainable hate for vegetarians (well, vegans really)? I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay. I have BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe. I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer. I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll. I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi. I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO. I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT. I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited. I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13. I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy. I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas. I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction. I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude. I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so i must be violent. I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy. I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid. I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot. I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat. I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly. I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7. I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals. I'm MIXED so I must be fucked up. (This, too, may be true) I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist. I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork. I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA. I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect. I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil. | |||||||
1. The Haunting of CRV Starghast » reviewsOn a secretive corporate research vessel, something has gone horribly wrong. When the newly-reformed Team StarFox is hired to investigate, they encounter terrors beyond their imagination. What started as a simple contract is now a fight to survive the night...and prevent the extermination of all life in the Lylat System. What is dead can never die.Star Fox - Rated: T - English - Horror/Suspense - Chapters: 10 - Words: 96,048 - Reviews: 78 - Updated: 6-13-13 - Published: 10-7-12 - Fox M. & Krystal2. A Cold Night in Hell » reviewsIn this sequel to "A Great Day to Die", Fox McCloud tries to put his team and his life back together and Wolf starts to question his choices as both become tangled in a web of intrigue surrounding a long-lost battleship and a vigilante known as "Kursed"Star Fox - Rated: T - English - Crime/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 244,880 - Reviews: 144 - Updated: 3-19-12 - Published: 1-15-10 - Fox M. & Wolf O'D. - Complete3. War Stories » reviewsThe Lylat War seen in StarFox 64 was a conflict of heroes, villains, ideas and emotions. In three stories from the war, see the conflict through the eyes of those that suffered and fought in it, from the dark beginning to the triumphant end.Star Fox - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 121,302 - Reviews: 55 - Updated: 7-11-09 - Published: 1-15-09 - Fox M. & Wolf O'D. - Complete4. Cubs » reviewsHow did Fox become Fox? How did Wolf become Wolf? And how did a scientist known as Andross come to threaten the freedom of an entire galaxy? A darker perspective on what happened before the Lylat Wars that shaped two cubs that would become bitter rivals.Star Fox - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 8 - Words: 41,576 - Reviews: 43 - Updated: 1-13-09 - Published: 11-7-08 - Fox M. & Wolf O'D. - Complete5. A Great Day to Die » reviewsIn a time when Fox has pushed away all of the people important to him, a deadly encounter with Wolf may cost Fox both his sanity and his life. A look into the minds of both Fox McCloud and Wolf O'Donnell.Star Fox - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 43,606 - Reviews: 61 - Updated: 6-11-08 - Published: 5-9-08 - Fox M. & Wolf O'D. - Complete6. A Gothamite's Tale » reviewsAn average teenager living in Gotham becomes involved in a conspiracy that could threaten not only Batman and Robin, but all of Gotham City. Please review!Batman - Rated: T - English - Crime/Mystery - Chapters: 7 - Words: 38,631 - Reviews: 15 - Updated: 4-25-08 - Published: 1-17-08