| Raindog Bride |
Author has written 21 stories for Labyrinth, Legend of Dragoon, Berserk, Bleach, and Avatar: Last Airbender. The Raindog Bride is, by all accounts, into tastelessly loud music and low-cut shirts. Its native habitat is the rolling hills surrounding Lake Baikal, and its diet consists mainly of sturgeon eggs and unstarched venison. It has no known natural predators, and may in fact be an invasive alien species, much like the Pacific Scotch Broom, and the East Coast varient of Kudzu. All tried and tested extermination techniques have proved ineffective, however, the Raindog Bride has shown a remarkable distaste for any and all references to Article 58 of the Soviet Constitution. Attempts to drive away the Raindog Bride by holding it briskly before oneself in both hands and striding confidently towards the subject have proved successful. The Raindog Bride is noted as having a capricious temperment, and a lofty attitude, but can be quickly calmed by the swift application of any nearby frozen portions of the genus Magnifera. However, the Raindog Bride is to be by no accounts approached idly, or with any signs of hostility, for it can reach landspeeds of upwards to sixty miles an hour in under seven minutes. The Raindog Bride is attracted to stories of doomed love and tragic circumstances, but is mostly drawn to those that show adequate awareness of plot pacing and structure, as well as aherance to the parameters of the original incarnation of the story. Deviations thereof will provoke extreme indifference in the Raindog Bride, as well as changes in overall coat pattern and genetic makeup. Failure to provide sufficient amounts of well-written prose will cause outbreaks of mange and dysentary, leading to an eventual state of perpetual ennui. At this point, the Raindog Bride will retire to any nearby fainting couch and not emerge until it has withered away entirely from consumption. Approach with caution, ply with expensive alcohol, and never remove your eyes from the Raindog Bride. | |||||||||||||
1. Stones For Your Passage reviewsSmellerbee and Longshot:: Years before she was a stripe-faced, raspy-voiced freedom fighter with a chip on her shoulder the size of Omashu, a girl was walking to Bah Sing Se. ::Oneshot:: ::Gen::Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,656 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7-28-09 - Smellerbee & Longshot2. Black Heart Stomp » reviewsFollow the myriad adventures of a certain foul-mouthed runaway from the Rouge Isles and how she met a eleven-thousand-year-old drifter with bad joints. Claire and Zieg, a lot of bad coffee, and a story that's never been told.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 65,739 - Reviews: 27 - Updated: 7-21-09 - Published: 1-21-08 - Claire F. & Zieg F.3. Cinders and Smoke reviewsThey say not to go to the caves north of the city. ::Drake and Lenus and what may or may not be Mayfil.:: :Gen. Rated T for, well, Lenus.:Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,097 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5-13-09 - Drake & Lenus - Complete4. Five Things That Never Happened reviewsCrack pairings, odd happenings, and non-existent conversations. Should-haves, would-haves, and never-beens.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,507 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 12-11-08 - Complete5. City of Misfortune » reviewsAfter the fall of the Moon, Mille Seseau is on the mend after the attacks on the capital, and Neet is finally being rebuilt. Wink sets out to get her life back, as well as the respect of her peers. Gehrich? He's just out for revenge. A farce in many acts.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 11,421 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 12-8-08 - Published: 7-31-08 - Wink6. Elements and Memory » reviewsSnapshots, one shots, crack pairings, and character explorations. A collection of scenes that take place before, during, and after the game. Part thirteen up- and it's entirely innapropriate!Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 13 - Words: 9,858 - Reviews: 21 - Updated: 9-18-08 - Published: 11-12-067. True Love and High Adventure reviewsThe timeless tale of Buttercup and Wesley's quest for True Love, with a twist. [Princess Bride x Bleach] [Pure crack.]Bleach - Rated: T - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,077 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 9-17-07 - Complete8. Intimately Rearranged reviewsShe’s a nasty shrew at heart, but it’s nice to pretend that she isn’t, that she’s just nervous and scared about being in a dress in a large crowd without a sword knocking against her hip. [Guts and Caska and a certain ballroom.]Berserk - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 487 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 9-14-07 - Complete9. Gather up our Bones » reviewsIt's years later after the fall of the Moon. Seles is rebuilt, Dart got a haircut, and Meru saved coming to him for last. A story in many small snippets in which no one is happy. ::COMPLETE:: What happens to a world not saved.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - Drama/General - Chapters: 18 - Words: 10,928 - Reviews: 24 - Updated: 8-8-07 - Published: 5-5-07 - Dart F. & Meru - Complete10. A Miranda Tale reviewsA classic fairy story about a benevolent Queen, some devoted sisters, a brave heroine, and her quest for adventure. And a nonkosher cottage with an evil witch and lots of swearing. Miranda. With humor. XDLegend of Dragoon - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,062 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 7-9-07 - Complete11. Tundra Rose reviewsDragon Campaign. Of Manor houses and drafty halls and old stories from a dead people. Of blue eyed prisoners and the quietest planned rebellion ever heard of. Zieg and Rose and the wolf eyed Moon.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - General/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,846 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 12-13-06 - Rose & Zieg F. - Complete12. Till we all fall down reviewsToothy grins and a red bandana. A girl who fought her way into a starring role in his life. Blue spirits and killer last words.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,844 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 10-21-06 - Lenus & Llyod - Complete13. Crash and Burn reviewsBlasted off a cliff and a long fall down. A moment in the game that shouldn't have happened and probably didn't. Dart and Rose.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - General/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,577 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 8-24-06 - Dart F. & Rose - Complete14. The Edge Life reviewsShameless LloydWink fluff set after his defeat in Kashua Glacier. Because the game didn't give these two enough.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,624 - Reviews: 10 - Published: 7-25-06 - Llyod & Wink - Complete15. The Great Battle reviewsThe dramatic fight between our heroes and the terrifying Divine Dragon. As presented by an idiot with a suprising amount of spare time. Now with puns and references!Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,146 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 7-5-06 - Complete16. Discontent reviewsShe wasn't who she should have been, and never would be. Mirandafocus, midgame.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,496 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 3-12-06 - Complete17. Conversation in Ulara reviewsWhen in Ulara, Dart and Rose head to the bar after speaking with Charle. There, Dart and Haschel drink, and Miranda and Rose have a much anticipated conversation.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: M - English - General/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,397 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 5-22-0518. Battledances and Heartsinging » reviewsA series of oneshots focusing on the Dragoon warrior's battle dances. They are short and swift, but more poetry than anything. You didn't really think they didn't enjoy the blood they spilled? Kongol's up.Legend of Dragoon - Rated: T - English - Drama/Poetry - Chapters: 8 - Words: 2,592 - Reviews: 34 - Updated: 9-18-04 - Published: 3-29-04 - Complete19. But that's how it is reviewsSarah is on her deathbed, old, and very sick, and she asks just one favor of the Goblin King before she dies. Warning- character death and no muppets involved to add comic relief.Labyrinth - Rated: K+ - English - General/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,351 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 6-22-0420. Through Hardships Unnumbered » reviewsSarah has been unkowingly blocked from her Labyrinth friends by Jareth, and without them, begins to go down a bad road. While she struggles in the mortal world, Hoggle, Didymus, and Ludo, try to correct it, while the Goblin King looks on.Labyrinth - Rated: T - English - General/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 17,384 - Reviews: 87 - Updated: 4-6-04 - Published: 9-20-0321. Toadstools and Smoke reviews(What happens when one falls in love with the ff.net review bot.) A short, sweet one shot, focusing one Jareth and Sarah when he stops in for an unforseen, and unseen visit.Labyrinth - Rated: K+ - English - General/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,280 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 10-7-03 - Complete