SLASH.

GAY SEX.

MEN (or man-shaped beings, eh, Crowley? Darth Maul? Dark elves?) HAVING SEX, as in INTERCOURSE, and occasionally ROMANTIC RELATIONS.

GAAAAAAAY POOOORN.

Consider yourself fucking warned. YES, I also think QUI-GON is doing THE GAY with OBI-WAN. Who's also GAY. GAAAAAAAAAY. Good kind of gay.

...yes, even Qui-Gon Jinn. Watch me destroy your innocent childhood. Mwahaha. -_-

I hope that got the point across as to what I write. I do not, DO NOT want to get another "i didnt even read this rly but u r liek so sick for making quigon/raine/entreri/whoever gay, cos liek zomg, dey r so NOT. u suck." Slash is being warned in front of each story I write (except one where it is actually canon. A damn yaoi manga. K? K.). If that's not your thing, do not waste space on my already too-empty review page. Call me immature for ranting, but I'm pissed off. Just don't spam me. Am I leaving flames on Suefics, as much as they bug me? No. Kthx.

(Nod of respect, though, to the one reviewer who phrased a similar sentiment as above in a sort of polite way, and had the guts to sign. You, of course, are not addressed.)

PS: and if you are actually well-meaning and really REALLY want to point out the error of my ways, you can reach me over PM, or email, or as an anon in my livejournal, if you're SUCH a chicken. Gah. Rant over.

Update: 25. October 2009

Nari is still full-force into INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS! Whooo, new fandom... recently joined by 17 moments of spring, a wonderful old Russian mini-series about a Sowjet spy in Nazi Germany. James Bond's and Landa's bastard child. EEEEE and his boss is so gay for him my god my god always leaning closer and then the movie cuts to a bloody lovesong. OMG. OMG, Schellenberg you pervy lil cute Nazi. Stop looking like a younger Christoph Waltz, dammit. ARGH. You can't even call that crossover, since it's both in the same setting... GOD, slash.

I barely got over True Blood (OMG OMG GODRIC returns for a flashback in season three OMG!!)... where, unfortunately, half of the pairing I wanted to write died after two episodes. Naatch. The Basterds helped me get over it. Whooooooo, languages!! 4 in one movie, 2 out of which I actually speak. French... I might've got the gist of it. Maybe. The general idea.

Before that, there was a brief stint into Star Wars, which planted an epic crossover with Death Gate Cycle in my head. Sith and Patryns is just general OTP.

And, even before that, when I was still active - kinda - in FR, see squee below - I also plotted an epic tale of King Gareth of Damarra. What's up with me and abandoned unknown little characters AND wanting to write epics about them? Same fandom, Rai'gy and Kimmuriel? Anyone knows these guys at all? Siiigh.

Nariel, also known as Nari, is an obsessed fangirl of the awesome, marvellous, sexy, cool, kickass, leather-attired and SEXY Artemis Entreri... yes, obsessed. The fangirling builds up, and sometimes vents into a fic. Which is rare.

Someday, I want to write a multi-chaptered fic and finish it.

What else? English is my third-and-a-half language, beside German, Russian and some Ucrainian, and I'm studying it right now, too, in a hopeless attempt to achieve native-level.

Current music: Inglourious Basterds Soundtrack. Trying NOT to listen to The Producers. It makes it impossible to write serious fic...

Projects: (order in likelihood of being finished... never mind, started.)

A Moment Of Spring - You Russians out there. Didn't you expect Stierlitz to pop up at Operation Kino? DO WANT. So far I have only vague ideas. Just want to put him in Basterds-verse. Either Operation Kino, or mind-dueling with Landa - or bending Hellstrom over the table. Ach, why not all three... Although it looks like Stierlitz/Schellenberg, right now. GOD, Schellenberg you boytoy. GUH.

The Diverging Path - long and epic Alternate Reality of Star Wars/Death Gate Cycle(which is the awesomest fantasy series that ever awesomed). The Sith and the Patryns ally to change the history of the Galactic Republic - for good, or for bad... Qui, Obi, Ani, Yoda and Windu are hard-pressed to stay alive in a Galaxy that hunts Jedi. Misunderstandings of doom. Ice cream. And a dog.

Damarran Tales - Salvatore's Sellswords. The story of King Gareth, and his friends. Beginning with their first adventures, Riordan's and Celedon's brotherly-cousinly love, Gareth's not very brotherly nor very cousinly fascination with Riordan, his rise as an unwilling hero, and later, King, and, eventually, Denial - the story of how Artemis Entreri broke into his world with a bang. Of course, it's all Jarlaxle's fault.

... and various untitled cute Eric/Godric fic and Nazi porn. Damn you, Tarantino... Damn you, Linndechir. Giving me the idea of Entreri/Gareth does not excuse you planting Nazi porn in my head. ARGH.

Oh, and then there is RPS. Shame on me. I blame this entirely on Linn, ASkars' hotness and Allan Hyde's forbidden cuteness. (And Eli, dammit. ) So damn cute. Fuck. FUCK. Somebody spank this out of me.