"Fuck off with your sofa units and strine green stripe patterns
I say never be complete
I say stop being perfect
I say let... let's evolve, let the chips fall where they may."

--Tyler Durden

Name: Raikune Real name: Alex
Age: 22 (sulk)
Occupation : wiseass
Location: England
Interests : Reading writing fanfiction manga anime Fight Club Tyler Durden Lord of the Rings Legend of Zelda Phantom of the Opera art drawing cartoons comics gamecube stealing icons sleeping late eating chocolate shounen-ai/slash/ boy's love/boypron/ boysex Pirates of the Carribean Captain Jack Sparrow Jean-Paul Sartre Vladimir Nabokov anarchy T.S. Eliot cats BLEACH Saiyuki Cowboy Bebop Gankutsuou: Count of Monte Cristo Fruits Basket Angel Sanctuary horror fiction science fiction fantasy fiction Harry Potter Discworld Naruto The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy His Dark Materials Futurama The Simpsons The Venture Brothers Prince of Tennis The Dark Tower The Dark Knight The West Wing

Stats to boost my ego:

I am on the favs list of 52 members
I am on the author alert list of 54 members
The longest fic I've written is 29,585 words
Various stories have been placed on 13 C2 comms
I have made 8 friends through my writing :) ...and that's the only statistic I care about.

ma linkz to ma othur stuff:

i.write.original.fiction.omgz

News:

2/16/09 Am taking a full-time intensive design course. Expect minimal updates. That is all.

8/14/08. Beta-reader status: full. No longer accepting any new requests. Thx.

IM ME: lordelrond34 (aol), MSN/Windows Live: Cowboybebop2005@hotmail.co.uk. I welcome everyone!

Supported Yaoi/Slash pairings:

Animanga:
Bleach:
Byakuya/Renji, Byakuya/Ichigo, Ichigo/Hitsugaya, Hollow!Ichigo/Ichigo (HichiIchi). I REALLY like uke!Ichigo as well 8D Kenpachi/Byakuya CTP!!, Ikkaku/Keigo (SHUDDUP), Keigo/Ichigo,
Naruto:
Kakashi/Sasuke, Kakashi/Naruto, GaaraxNaruto, NarutoxSasuke, Suigetsu/Sasuke, Suigetsu/Sasuke/Juugo, Itachi/Sasuke, Itachi/Kakashi, Itachi/Kakashi/Sasuke, Deidara/Tobi, Yondaime/Kakashi, Madara/Itachi
TV:
Smallville:
Clark Kent/Lex Luthor
LOST:
Jack/Sawyer, Ben/Locke, Desmond/Charlie
House MD:
House/Wilson
Movies:
Fight Club:
Tyler/Jack
The Dark Knight:
Batman/Joker, kid!Bruce Wayne/kid!Joker, Joker/Harvey, Harvey Dent/Two-Face selfcest, Batman/Harvey, Bruce Wayne/Harvey

Supported Het Pairings:
Stark/Lilinette, Byakuya/Yoruichi, Byakuya/Rukia, Kakashi/Rin

//////SHOWCASE: ORIGINAL FICTION BY RAIKUNE!

'SINFUL LOVE' -
-this story has been updated (ch. 14) as of 10/6/07-

- (contains language, blasphemy, and hot yaoi!Not for people who are devoutly religiousy!Rated M!PH34R!)

Featuring:

Mephisto, a lascivious demon who had one job to do: steal a quality soul for Hell so his superiors wouldn't kick him out, but ended up falling for
Nemphis, a messenger angel who Mephisto met in a pub, sent to Earth to lie low after spilling coffee all over Jesus Christ. He also catches the attraction of
Lucifer, the smexy Lord of Darkness who wants Nemphis for Himself, but ends up fighting for the angel's soul with
Michael, the fiery angelic warrior, Commander of the Angel Army, who ALSO wants Nemphis (in a totally non-sexual way) and would do anything to free him from Lucifer's thrall. However, Nemphis is taken into Heaven away from everyone's clutches, and Mephisto must enlist the help of
Sunday, the sunglass-wearin' fallen angel and Deep Lord of Misrule who thinks Mephisto's a dumbass, but who he helps anyway by forcing two angels to help Mephisto reach Heaven, namely:
Azirefel, the aloof, haughty, and cold-eyed Angel of Winter who isn't happy with the situation thank-you-very-much, and
Samael, the freakishly tall and tremendously scary three-winged Good & Evil angel, lieutenant of Heaven's Special Angelic Forces,whose hidden agenda includes stopping the mad angel
Reichiel, a general who plans to seize control of Heaven and overthrow the power of God and Metatron!

...co-stars many other angels and demons! Just read it already, and review!

And now for some QUOTES:

"I don't need first-aid, Hank, I need you to stop choking me and hitting me with fire extinguishers." -- Dr. Venture (The Venture Bros)

Bender: You know, I was God once.
God : Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died. -- (Futurama)

"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." - Douglas Adams

"Far back in the mists of ancient time, in the great and glorious days of the former Galactic Empire, life was wild, rich and largely tax-free." --The Hitchhikher's Guide to the Galaxy

"Day One:
Went to Council of Elrond. Was prettiest person there. Agreed to follow some tiny little man to Mordor to throw ring into volcano. Very important mission - gold ring so tacky." - Legolas (Lord of the Rings: The Very Secret Diaries)(again)

"One should always try to be a little improbable." - Wilde

"Pleasure is the only thing one should live for. Nothing ages like happiness." - Wilde

"Those who see a difference between body and soul have neither." - Wilde

"Art is the only serious thing in the world. And the artist is the only person who is never serious." - Wilde

"Friendship is far more tragic then love. It lasts longer." - Oscar Wilde

"When I get a little money, I buy books. And if there is any left over, I buy food." - Erasmus (my sentiments exactly)

"Listen up, maggots. You are not special. You are not a unique or beautiful snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everyone else. We are the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world." - Tyler Durden (Fight Club)

When you've been a wizard as long as I have, my boy, you'll learn that as soon as you find anything that offers amazing possibilities for the improvement of the human condition it's best to put the lid back on and pretend it never happened. - The Last Continent (A Discworld novel)

Nil ego contulerim iucundo sanus amico: While I am sane I shall compare nothing to the joy of a friend. - Horace (Satires, I. v. 44)

'One of things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit of continually stating and repeating the very very obvious, as in It's a nice day, or You're very tall, or Oh dear, you seem to have fallen down a thirty-foot well, are you all right?' - (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

'Please feel free to blither now.' (Mostly Harmless)

""Now I want you to listen very carefully to what I am about to say...otherwise you will die. In an interesting fashion. Over a period. Please stop fidgeting like that." - Lord Vetinari (Discworld series)

"What raging fire shall flood the soul? What rich desire unlocks its doors? What sweet seduction lies before us...?" - The Phantom (ALW)